A BUDDHIST NUN

and AMERICAN INMATES

 Bhikṣuṇī T.N. Giới Hương

Foreword by

Tojin Douglas Stream

  

Hong Duc Publishing

 

Huong Sen Buddhist Temple

19865 Seaton Avenue, Perris, CA 92570, USA Tel: (951) 657-7272, Cell: (951) 616-8620

Email: This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. https://www.facebook.com/Huong.Sen.Riverside/ Web: www.huongsentemple.com

Copyright 2025 by Huong Sen Buddhist Temple in the United States.

 

Iron bars hold still

Yet the dawn whispers through

Quiet mends my soul.

                                ***

 

 

CONTENTS

Preface - Thích Nữ Giới Hương                                                    17

Foreword - Tojin Douglas Stream                                                19

Introduction - Thích Nữ Giới Hương                                            23

Chapter 1: REFLECTING ON THE BEAUTIFUL MINDS                 27

• Introducing Wisconsin 27
• Wisconsin Correctional Camps 29
• Religious Practice in Prisons 31
• Preparing for Visits 32
• Reflecting on the Beautiful Minds 40
  • Robert Trokan - Buddhist name, Tochiku 40
  • James Lala 57
  • David Rustad 58
  • Pete McCredie 64
  • Daniel Kevin Dannells - Buddhist name, Tosetsu 66
  • John Halka 68
  • Douglas Stream - Buddhist name, Tojin 70

Chapter 2: HATE AND DISCRIMINATION                                  94

• The Cultural Bias - Venerable TN Giới Hương 98
• Gender Discrimination - Venerable TN Giới Hương 99
• Blind About Religion - Venerable TN Giới Hương 101
• Love, Compassion, and Peace - Blake 102
• The Dark Moment - Jonathan 103

• Intimate Call - P. 105
• Racial Color Blindness - Tojin 115
• Gang Discrimination - Tojin 122

Chapter 3: THE HARM OF CRIMINALS                                    133

• The Contributing Factors - Venerable TN Giới Hương 133
• The Consequences - Venerable TN Giới Hương 134
• Increased Crime - Venerable TN Giới Hương 135
• Solitary Confinement - Tojin 137
• Rape - Venerable TN Giới Hương 138
• Influences From Childhood - Venerable TN Giới Hương 140
• Violence or Nonviolence - Thomas Joachim 142
• Causes of the Crime - Andrew Berns 143
• Unfortunate - David 144
• Irrigation of Seeds - Alfredo O’Kray 145
• Prisoners Are Humans - Venerable TN Giới Hương 148
• Eliminating Wrath - Venerable TN Giới Hương 150
• Harm - Joshua 152
• Away From the Flame of Anger - Jayden 153
• Hunted Animal - Daniel 153
• Death Penalty- Alexander 154
• Letter From a Death-Row Prisoner- Amos Lee King 156
• Letter to a Ten-Year-Old Boy - Amos Lee King 159
• Consequences of Crime for Victims - Ronald Clements 162

Chapter 4: THE CHANTING RITUAL                                       172

• Practicing Rules 174

• Precepts 176
• The Chanting Ritual in Wisconsin Prisons 177
  • Praising the Triple Gem 177
  • Prayers 178
  • The Discourse on Loving-kindness (Metta Sutta) 178
  • Heart of Great Perfect Wisdom Sutra 179
  • The Confession 181
  • The Four Great Vows 181
  • Closing Verse 182
  • Returning Merit 182
• Refuge Ceremony 182
• The Five Precepts - Nathaniel 185
• Benefits of Meditation - Venerable TN Giới Hương 186
• Results of the Retreat - Diego 189
• The Ultimate Story of Meditation - Anthony Baez 191
• Fear - Anthony Baez 195
• Having a Religion in Life - Casey Rogers 200

Chapter 5: THE PRISON WORLD                                            202

• Impermanent - Venerable TN Giới Hương 212
• Various Ranks of Prisoners - Tojin 213
• The Prison’s Culture - Matthew 216
• Rise Up - Nelson Mandela 216
• Little Squirrel - Alexander Buczko 217
• Choice and Change - Anthony 218
• Crazy Story in the New Year - Tojin 219

• Going Home to Funerals - William 221
• New Year’s Gifts - John 222
• Effect of the Teaching - Tojin 223
• Deer - Bo Flack 226
• Understand and Love - Brian Locks 229
• Fear of Overwhelming - Tojin 230
• Prison and Prayer - Ryan 232
• Competing for the Bathroom -Tojin 238
• Freedom of Religion - Nicholas 239
• To Live in Prison - Tyler 240
• Upset - Tojin 240
• Revenge - Kenvin 242
• Blame - James 242
• Don’t Criticize - David 243
• Walking in the Downtown - Paul 246
• Steal - John 247
• Suicidal - Nathan 248
• Moribund - Michael 250
• Compassionate Warmth - Samuel 250
• The Hell Realms - Christian 251
• Quietly Leaving - Noah 252
• Practice - Dylan 252
• The Noisy World - Benjamin 253
• Stand Up After Falling - Logan 255
• Money - Brandon 256
• Patience - Zachary 258

• Situation in Prison - Elijah 259
• Gluttony - Rustad 262
• Let Go of Grasping - Kenvin 263
• Prison of the Mind - Angel 264
• Pure Silence - Susan 266
• A Corner of the Cell - Jack 268
• Prisoners Have Too Many Privileges - Caleb 270
• Joy in Prison - Randy 272
• The Fellow Inmate - Jacky 273
• Advantages - Harry 275
• Hunger Strike - Justin 276
• Live in the Here and Now - Austin 277
• Uposatha Day - Tojin 278
• Depending Upon Beings - Tojin 279
• A Good Chance - Robert 280
• The Art of Living in Prison - Luke 281
• Which Prisoner Demonstrates the Greatest Growth? - Andy 283
• Working - Venerable TN Giới Hương 285
• Meditation - Aidan 287
• Smoking - Gavin 287
• Difficulty - Scott Louis 288
• Life in Jail - Terrell McCraw 289
• A Quilt of Compassion - Leighton Bates 295
• Doing Well Whatever the Circumstance - Bubba 300
• Life Prisoners Offer Scholarships - Cadence 301
• Change in the Prison World - Cadence 303

• Every Phenomenon Has Its Cause - Mason 303
• Regret - Jordan 305
• Challenges of the Positive Vow - Jackson 306
• Lucky - Tojin 307

Chapter 6: THE SUPPORT OF DHARMA                                  309

• Conversation Between Chaplain Joseph Baker

and Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

- Venerable T.N. Giới Hương                                               309

• Those Seek Religion - Kowach 315
• Entering the Prison - Amanda 316
• My Mind, My Name - Tojin 316
• The Miraculous Buddha’s Teaching - Helene 318
• Craving - John 319
• Ignorance and Anger - Susan 322
• Keeping Balance - Peppers 324
• Convert - Diana 326
• Free - Andreas 327
• Avoid Discussing Human Error - Tojin 328
• Secular - Jack 329
• Dharma Instrument - Ansley 330
• Anxious to See the Results of Practice - Samantha 332
• A Fellow Buddhist - Tojin 333
• My Life - Brian Locks 335
• Awakening - Steven 336
• Labels - Charles 338
• Friendship - Brandon 339

• Karma - Gabriel 341
• Solitary Confinement - Anonymous 342
• It’s Their Fault - Robert 344
• Read Between the Lines - Ryan Kelsheineir 347
• Challenging the Bodhisattva Vow - James 348
• Tiger Inside the Mind - Sebastian 350
• Where Does the Fear Come From? - Sebastian 351
• Four Noble Truths and Buddha Nature - Devin 351
• Holding the Dharma - Antonia 354
• Mutual Respect - Richard 355
• Few Lines - Tojin 356
• Overcoming Disappointment and Anxiety - Miguel 357
• Ineptitude and Potato Chips - Jeffrey Bell 358
• Reunion - Julian 361
• Self-Devils - Sean 364
• Buddha Nature - Hilzarie 365
• Do No Harm - Salome M. Fonseca 366
• Seeds - Douglas Stream - Tojin 367
• Compassion Sutra - Colin 369
• The Miracle of Kwan Yin Bodhisattva - Cong Tran 370
• Life Change - Devin 373
• Meditation - Sebastian 375
• What Brings Happiness - Wyatt 376
• Praying With the Hospice Patients - Nathaniel 378
• Lonely - Luis 380
• Goodness - Calix 382

• Accusation - Logan 382
• Practicing in Prison - Calypso 384
• My Life Has Meaning - Totsesu 384
• Clinging - Romijin 386
• The Vajrayana Retreat - Cairistiona 387
• Inmates and Buddhism - Tojin 388
• Equal Compassion - Tojin 390

Chapter 7: THE BUDDHA‘S TEACHING

ON THE DEATH PENALTY                                    393

• The Five Precepts 394
• The First Precept 394
• Compassion 396
• Buddhata (innate goodness of the mind) 397
• Do Not Kill Animals 398
• Vegetarianism 399

7. 7. A Form of Revenge 400
8. 8. Psychology 400
9. 9. Law of Karma 401

7. Buddhist Texts 403
   1. Theravada Suttas 403
      • Dhammapada 403
      • Jatakas 403
      • Majjhima Nikaya 407
   2. Mahayana Sutras 408
      • Avatamsaka Sutra 408

• Brahma Net Sutra 408

1. Mahayana Treatise 409
   • Rajaparikatha-Ratnamala 409
   • Buddhist Kings in India 410
     1. Buddhist King (Northern India) 410
     2. Buddhist King (Mid-India) 412

• Buddhist King (Central India) 413

1. Buddhist King (West India) 413

• King in Japan 413
• Dalai Lama in Tibet 414
• Practical Application 414

Chapter 8: ADDICTION                                                         422

• Choice and Consequences - Bo Flack 424
• Happiness and Joy - Sylvia B 431
• Hold on for Life - Habiba 433
• Fighting Addiction - Bill 433
• The Flow - Elijah 434
• Smoke From a Coffee Cup - Amy 436
• Overcome Your Alcoholic Error - Alberto 438
• Drug Rehabilitation Center - P. 440
• A Funny Story About Saving Beings - David 445
• Intoxicants - L. 446
• Who’s Poisoning Me? - P. 448
• Compassion at a Juvenile Reformatory in Michoacan, Mexico - Zopa Herron 451

• Addiction and the Four Noble Truths - Akasha 453
• Awakening Ignorance - Rock and Roll 455

Chapter 9: LIFE AFTER PRISON                                             457

• Probably Worse - Abbott 459
• Detention and Freedom - Andrew 460
• Fear of Progress - Sophia 463
• Peace in Prison - William 467
• Finding Happiness - Andrew 468
• Prisoners - TN Giới Hương 469
• Nervous - Anthony 470
• Release from Prison - Sahirah 471
• Worry - Mitch Medford 472
• The Same Circumstance - Bryan 477
• How to Live - Matthew 479
• The Gratitude - Dianne 480
• The Liberation Prison Project - Arturo Esquer 482
• Tie a Yellow Ribbon Around the Old Oak Tree

- Irwin Levine and L. Russell Brown                                    486

Chapter 10: CONCLUSION                                                     489

Reference                                                                          502

Bảo Anh Lạc Bookshelf                                                          504

                                       ***

PREFACE

T

his is a revised and enlarged edition of A Buddhist Nun and American Inmates, which was   first published fifteen years ago in the Vietnamese language in 2010. Seven editions were printed in 2010, 2012, 2014,

2016, 2018, 2020, and 2025 at Phương Đông and Hồng Đức Publishing, Sàigòn, Việt Nam.

This present seventh edition has been translated into English from the Vietnamese verson. Unfortunately, the orginal English letters were lost when moving from Wisconsin to California. In presenting this seventh edition at Hồng Đức Publishing House, Sàigòn, Việt Nam, I have preserved the original versions from the first edition. However, for the sake of clarity, a few changes have been made, errors have been corrected for ease of reading, the coding numbers in the subheadings of each chapter have been included and the two volumes are combined into one.

I would like to gratefully acknowledge with special thanks Pamela Kirby and inmate Douglas Stream (Tojin), (English editors who worked as my assistants for English translating and proofreading), Rev. T.N. Vien Nhuan and Mr. Vu Dinh Trong who helps us design, permit, and publish.

We rejoice in introducing readers near and far to the Dharma and invite corrections and comments from our readers to be incorporated into future printings. We look forward to hearing from you.

Spring at Hương Sen Temple,

January 15, 2025

Bhikṣuṇī T.N. Giới Hương

 

FOREWORD

By Tojin—Douglas Stream

  

W

hen Bhiksuni T.N. Giới Hương requested that I write the foreword for A Buddhist Nun and American Inmates, I was honored to do so. This book has been reprinted seven times in Vietnam with Dong Phuong and Hong Duc Publishers. It was only on this seventh occasion that she had the time to release her work in English. I considered it a great honor and an even greater responsibility.

There are so many lives at stake within the prison system and by the very nature and reality of interconnectedness many more lives are at stake on the outside. Prison can be a hopeless place bursting at the seams with violence, ignorance, hatred, and fear. This book seeks to balance some of those long—held beliefs and feelings and guide prisoners to practice.

I first met Bhiksuni TN Giới Hương in 2007 when I was thirty—two years old and in a maximum security prison with parole eligibility forty—four years away. It is now 2020; I am forty—five years old and received a

sentence modification in 2016. I am awaiting transfer to a minimum—security facility and I will seek parole for the third time two weeks from now.

Inmate Tojin (Douglas Stream) in the visitor room of Kettle Moraine Correctional Institution, Wisconsin

 It is within this frame of mind that I contribute this foreword. I mentioned my current circumstances because that is all we really ever have—the present moment. Many of the original contributors, myself included, ended up in prison because of decisions we made at what was once a present moment in our lives.

What I have tried to do with my contributions to this book is share my story to demonstrate for others that despite horrible decisions that alter the course of one’s life, there is hope for redemption. Every human being, including every prisoner, has redemptive qualities.

There couldn’t be a better time for the translation and re—publication of this book. The current atmosphere surrounding the justice system in this country and specifically the prison system, with what has become known as “mass incarceration,” has to be addressed.

The letter and stories that Bhiksuni TN Giới Hương has compiled offer a clear snapshot of how inmates exposed to the Buddha’s teaching can change.

This book, A Buddhist Nun and American Inmates, puts a human face to the causes of crime, living with the consequences of those crimes and finding a purpose to life within the aftermath, all through the teachings of Buddha.

Inmates are very often overlooked simply because of the label, “inmate.” What Bhiksuni TN Giới Hương has done here is turn that stereotype on its head, and through her compassion, given us a voice to share with the world. She has shown that we matter to the world.

The people in this book are real with their actual names or pseudonyms. It shows what is possible when someone adapts the simple teachings of the Buddha to their life.

Many people had a hand in presenting this volume of work but it cannot be stressed enough that this wouldn’t be possible without the hard work, kindness, and determination of Bhiksuni TN Giới Hương. She came from Vietnam, a different country with a different culture. She spoke a different language and was determined to help those whom most of society ignored or didn’t have time to care for. That compassion and direct action is what the Buddha’s teachings are all about.

May the merit of this work extend universally to all who read it.

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Kettle Moraine Correctional Institution Wisconsin, August 29, 2020 Triple bow with deep respect,

Tojin — Douglas Stream

                                                          ***

INTRODUCTION

By Thích Nữ Giới Hương

 

T

enzin Gyatso, His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama

said, “We are all potential criminals, and those who we have put into prison are no worse, deep down, than any one of us. They have succumbed to ignorance, desire, and anger, ailments that we all suffer from but to different degrees. Our duty is to help them.”

I had been in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA, for more than four years (2006—2010) and during that time, I had several good conditions arise which allowed me to visit many correctional institutions through Wisconsin.

During this time I also watched television, read American newspapers, observed social realities, and most importantly, had extensive contact with numerous American inmates. I listened to their belated repentance, and what they learned firsthand about the formidable consequences of evil, such as greed, anger, delusion, selfishness, jealousy, hate, and discrimination.

I was shocked to see the current scenes of reincarnation and realized what the Buddha taught about the transformation of the flow of good and bad of the mind is right. They (good or bad) are only separated by a second, by one decision or choice, the results of which can be beneficial or harmful.

The teachings of the Buddha are simple and accurate:

1. Mind is the forerunner of all evil states Mind is chief; mind—made are they

If one speaks or acts with wicked mind

Because of that, suffering follows one

Even as the wheel follows the hoof of the draught—ox.

(Dhammapada, Verse 1)¹

2. Mind is the forerunner of all good states Mind is chief; mind—made are they

If one speaks or acts with pure mind Because of that, happiness follows one Even as one’s shadow that never leaves. (Dhammapada, Verse 2)²

In 2005, before leaving India for America after ten years of studying (1995—2005), I wrote the book, Ban Mai Xứ Ấn (Dawn in India, three volumes). Now, after

 

1. Dhammapada, Verses 1 and 2. Ven. Thích Minh Châu translated into Vietnamese Buddhist Research Institute, 1994. Việt Nam. http:// www.buddhismtoday.com/viet/kinh/pali/phapcu1.htm

four years of serving Buddhism in the snowy land of Milwaukee, Wisconsin (2006—2010), before moving to California to continue my studies, I felt the urge to pick up my pen once again and create a new book, Nữ Tu Và Tù Nhân Hoa Kỳ. The English version is A Buddhist Nun and American Inmates.

The general content of the work reports my visits and the collected Buddhist letters exchanged between US prisoners at a number of Wisconsin prisons, and the author, a Vietnamese nun, Bhiksuni T.N. Giới Hương. These characters are real with some using pseudonyms. These American Buddhist prisoners and the author would like to share their thoughts from a Buddhist perspective on the phenomenon of social violence, the cause of imprisonment which comes from ignorance and anger. With hope, we can skillfully control our mind, not engage in greed, anger, and delusion that leads to bad results, creates suffering for many, and burdens families, society, and country.

The author has received hundreds of letters from offenders. In each letter, every life has drawn a picture of suffering in this United States. However, each letter also draws on the beauty of a good mind, trying to rise up like a lotus beyond the black mud. According to the contents of the letters, the author divided them into chapters to contribute to this book.

The Buddha taught us to sit under a tree, even if only for three days. Many prisoners have lived in prison for longer than three days, and sometimes for life. As a result, there are countless stories of bitterness, joy, suffering, patience, hate, and love in the prison. Various everyday life stories have illustrated the world of prisoners behind bars, as well as the way inmates embrace the Buddhist spiritual life—a practical and transformative path that can be applied anywhere.

Sincere gratitude for the support and contribution of Venerable Bhiksuni Tonen Sara O’Connor (Abbess of Milwaukee Meditation Center and President of Sōsaku Newspaper),³ Mr. Phúc Hòa (Chairman of Phước Hậu Temple), prisoner Douglas Stream whose Dharma name is Tojin), inmate and editor of the quarterly Sōsaku Newspaper,⁴ the prisoners of Tochiku (Robert), Tosetsu (Daniel Kevin Dannells), James Lala, David Rustad, Pete McCredie, John Halk and many other prisoners who wrote letters and contributed to the completion of this collection.

Writing about this area of inmates is a new step. I look forward to the guidance of friends and readers for future editions to make the book more complete. Thank you very much.

May the Buddha bless you all.

Summer in Milwaukee, March 16, 2010 With love and respect,

Thích Nữ Giới Hương

 

3. Reverend Tonen O’Connor, Resident Priest, Milwaukee Zen Center. She is currently the Resident Priest Emerita. Among her numerous du- ties and workload as a Soto Zen Priest, she oversees the publication and distribution of the Sōsaku Newsletter.
4. Douglas Stream (Buddhist name Tojin), inmate and editor of the quar- terly Buddhist newsletter, Sōsaku, which is written by and for the Bud- dhist practitioners within the Wisconsin prison system. Sōsaku is pub- lished by the Milwaukee Zen Center.

                                                                                                                              ***

Chapter 1

REFLECTING ON THE BEAUTIFUL MINDS

1.1.    Introducing Wisconsin

The contents in this book take place in the state of Wisconsin,¹ the twenty—third largest of the fifty states⁵ in the United States. Wisconsin is located in latitude N44° 56’ 43.044, W91° 59’ 44.6676” and longitude 88.7879° W.

The area is 65,503 square miles. Wisconsin is known for being bordered by two of the great lakes, Lake Michigan

5. Fifty States of America: 1. Alabama, 2. Alaska, 3. Arizona, 4.Arkan- sas, California, 6. Colorado, 7. Connecticut, 8. Delaware, 9. Florida,
6. Georgia, 11. Hawaii, 12. Idaho, 13. Illinois, 14. Indiana, 15. Iowa,
7. Kansas, 17. Kentucky, 18. Louisiana, 19. Maine, twenty. Maryland,
8. Massachusetts, 22. Michigan, 23 .Minnesota, 24. Mississippi, 25.

Missouri, 26. Montana, 27. Nebraska, 28. Nevada, 29. New Hampshire,

30. New Jersey, 31. New Mexico, 32. New York, 33. North Carolina, 34. North Dakota, 35. Ohio, 36. Oklahoma, 37. Oregon, 38. Pennsylvania,
31. Rhode Island, 40. South Carolina, 41. South Dakota, 42. Tennessee,
32. Texas, 44. Utah, 45. Vermont, 46. Virginia, 47. Washington, 48. West Virginia, 49. Wisconsin, 50. Wyoming (www.50state.com/us.htm)

and Lake Superior. These two lakes belong to the system of the world’s largest Great lakes. The entire eastern coast of Wisconsin is bordered by Lake Michigan and many cities and towns are located along the coast.⁶

Map of Wisconsin (Google)⁷

 Wisconsin has four distinct seasons: spring, summer, autumn, and winter. During my time in Wisconsin, I lived in the city of Milwaukee. I observed the seasons change from the trees in spring sprouting their beautiful leaves, turning the entire city green, to the hot and sultry summer with winds blowing off Lake Michigan. The autumn is short but beautiful with the leaves falling to the ground in a poetic array of colors from yellow to orange to red. The winter finds the city covered with white snowflakes and makes the city appear silently frozen under the snow.

6. The Five Great http://www.50states.coxm/wisconsin.htm
7. https://www.google.com/

The Vietnamese population in Milwaukee is relatively small, totaling about 3,000 (all religions). This is due in part to the snow and cold. Just to the south, the state of Illinois has a Vietnamese population of about 10,000.

In 2005, after attending a conference in the US, I was invited by the late Most Venerable Mãn Giác to become the abbess of the Phước Hậu Buddhist Temple, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. I remained there for four years. Buddhists often come to pray at Phước Hậu Temple, the only temple in the state. The gatherings have numbered up to 200 during the big festivals.

                                                  

1.2.                                Wisconsin Correctional Camps

American crime is one of the biggest problems in the world today. According to research,⁸ from 1970—2000 the number of inmates in each state increased by 50 percent. The number of inmates increased by 20 percent in Wisconsin between 2000—2008.

In Wisconsin, more than half of the 24,000 inmates are between the ages of sixteen and thirty—five. Terms of imprisonment can vary from six months to life, depending on the severity of the crime—less time for misdemeanors and more time for felonies.

Many inmates have as part of their sentence what is called parole, probation, or extended supervision. A high percentage of inmates return to prison many times.

8. “Incarceration Trends in Wisconsin.” Vera Institute of Justice. https://www.vera.org/downloads/pdfdownloads/state—incarceration— trends—wisconsin.pdf.

“Tracking State Prison Growth in 50 States”

https://www.prisonpolicy.org/reports/overtime.html

They either commit new crimes or violate the terms of their parole, probation, or extended supervision. This can extend the sentence longer than what was originally intended.

I was able to visit many prisons in Wisconsin and had the opportunity to meet and talk with numerous prisoners, especially through letters. The number of male prisoners is higher than that of females, thus requiring more prisons for males.

In general, the motivation for these inmates to commit crimes is to serve their need for money to satisfy their addictions. These addictions vary from drugs, gambling, sex, luxurious lifestyles that they couldn’t otherwise afford, and other assorted debts. The crimes that manifest from these addictions vary from fraud, theft, armed robbery, sexual assault, and murder.

Most prisoners have admitted to using drugs like marijuana and alcohol at an early age. These things have brought out the worst in them—greed, lewdness, anger, ignorance, and confusion which in turn led them to fall into dishonesty and the violation of social laws.

Some teenagers and many adults have to live in prison for years, including some for the rest of their lives because of their immorality and moral abuse.

Some states still have the death penalty, however, Wisconsin is not one of them. In Wisconsin there are about twenty adult prisons and several juvenile prisons.

1.3.    Religious Practice In Prisons

Prisoners belong to many different religions; some are even atheists. The chaplains, those overseeing the chapels, also belong to or practice different religions, including Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Hinduism, and Buddhism. In fact, the chaplain working at the Jackson Correctional Institution in Black River Falls, Wisconsin, is a Buddhist. The main duty of the chaplain is to help prisoners meet their spiritual guide so they can practice their religious rituals.

The prisons⁹ I was able to visit were:

1. Racine Correctional Institution, Medium Security, Sturtevant, Wisconsin
2. Oshkosh Correctional     Institution,     Medium Security, Oshkosh, Wisconsin
3. Taycheedah Correctional Institution, Maximum/ Medium, Fon du lac, Wisconsin
4. Green Bay Correctional Institution, Maximum, Green Bay, Wisconsin
5. Waupun Correctional    Institution,    Maximum, Waupun, Wisconsin
6. Dodge Correctional Institution, Maximum (the state’s intake prison), Waupun, Wisconsin

• Fox Lake Correctional Institution, Medium, Fox Lake, Wisconsin\This book was originally intended for a Vietnamese audience and as such, descriptions and explanations of locations and other sorted facts were meant to offer some background information to the Vietnamese reader and to let them know what the environment was like where the Venerable N. Giới Hương lived and what she was experiencing.

8. Redgranite Correctional   Institution,   Medium, Redgranite, Wisconsin
9. Wisconsin Secure    Program    Facility,   Super Maximum, Boscobel, Wisconsin
10. New Lisbon Correctional Institution, Medium, New Lisbon, Wisconsin
11. Kettle Moraine Correctional Institution, Medium, Kettle Moraine, Wisconsin
12. Wisconsin Resource Center, (for emotionally disturbed prisoners), Winnebago, Wisconsin

1.4.    Preparing To Visit The Prisons

During my time in Milwaukee, I had the good fortune to meet the Venerable Reverend Tonen Sara O’Connor, Resident Priest of the Milwaukee Zen Center. American born and seventy—five years old, she had been previously married with two sons and has been ordained for more than ten years in the sect of Japanese Soto Zen Buddhism.

Since we lived in the same city, we were both involved in and engaged with work for the Buddhist Peace Fellowship of Milwaukee. This, along with the many car rides to visit the various prisons, afforded us opportunities to discuss the Dharma.

Although she is older, Tonen is very healthy and active, does charitable work, and actively promotes Buddhism. Venerable Tonen’s dedication is remarkable.

One of the things most worthy of note is Tonen’s work in the prisons and her oversight of the publication and distribution of a prison newsletter called Sōsaku. Sōsaku is

a Japanese word that means “production, literary creation, and creative writing.”

Sōsaku is published by the Milwaukee Zen Center and was started by Douglas Stream, also known by his Buddhist name, Tojin. Tojin is a male prisoner in Green Bay, Wisconsin, who both writes for Sōsaku and serves as its editor. Most of the writers for Sōsaku are prisoners. It’s published four times a year and its purpose is to provide opportunities for prisoners to study the Dharma and share their spirituality. It is the hope of the editors that through the publication of Sōsaku a message of understanding, compassion, tolerance, and respect will develop among all prisoners, Buddhist and non—Buddhist alike.

The Venerable Tonen and I have shared many memorable experiences. For me to be able to visit the prisons, Tonen went to great lengths to take care of all the procedures on my behalf.

A few email exchanges below between Venerable Tonen and me in 2007 show our preparations and describe how we had to deal with bad weather and sometimes cancel or postpone our trips.

From: Venerable T.N. Giới Hương This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. Dear Ven. Tonen,

We will cancel the trip to Oshkosh Correctional Institution (OSCI) tomorrow because the weather forecast is calling for a snowstorm and windy conditions. But I will accompany you to OSCI on February 19, 2007. Hope the weather will not be bad. I wish you a good night.

From: Tonen O’Connor This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. Dear Ven. T.N. Giới Hương,

The snow has just stopped falling here, and I estimate that we’ve received about twenty inches, (an inch equaling about one and a half of my knuckles). The street is so muddy, wet, and dirty. I do not know how much snow fell in Oshkosh, where we intend to go, but here it will take me a long time to get my car out of the snow (because the snow is covering my car). I would then have a hard time weaving through the unplowed roads to get to Highway

41. In addition, I have just completed a two—day retreat (fifteen hours on Saturday and ten hours today). During the retreat, I instructed on meditation, chanting, held Dharma talks, cooked all three meals, held lectures, and generally did everything. Many Buddhists attended and to be quite honest, I feel very tired. It is always difficult to visit Oshkosh Correctional Institution or any other visit after a two—day weekend retreat.

I can endure the suffering if the roads are safe, however it is worrying and dangerous for us on the slippery and snowy roads. I am very sorry to have to cancel the trip tomorrow. I hope Venerable T.N. Giới Hương and I can go together to Oshkosh Correctional Institution to teach meditation on February 19, 2007.

I want to sincerely thank Susan for helping me with the procedures, licenses, etc. and thanks to Venerable T.N. Giới Hương who was enthusiastically willing to attend regardless of the circumstances.

Hope the weather will be good in February. Wish you all goodness.

From: Venerable T.N. Giới Hương This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. Dear Ven. Tonen,

Thank you for your letter and good plan. We will be at the Zen Center around 8:45 a.m. on Friday morning if you can confirm the time again for tomorrow’s visit to Racine prison. I will prepare and pack a lunch for us to share at the Milwaukee Zen Center.

The plan for Monday is very good. We will follow that. Can I bring a camera to the prison? If they don’t allow photos in the prison, can we leave the camera in your car? Can we take pictures of the two of us in front of the prison gate? I think it’s okay right? I want to write a report on my work, and it will be perfect if it’s able to be illustrated with photos.

I am very impressed and respect you very much for these volunteer activities.

Have a good night.

                                                      ***

From: Tonen O’Connor

This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

Dear Ven. T.N. Giới Hương,

The Racine Correctional Institution has not given approval for visitation, but we will go there on the designated day of Friday, January 19. If there is a problem, I will notify you. For this trip you should be present around 8:45 a.m. You can park in the backyard of the Zen Center. Since it takes about forty—five minutes to drive there, the departure time couldn’t be later than 9 a.m. so that we can be there on time to make it through the checkpoint and meet everyone by 10 a.m.

This is a medium—security prison. The Buddhist group is not very crowded; only about twelve male prisoners. There may be only eleven people on Friday because one person must attend a special treatment group that coincides with our meditation instruction time. Meditation will be completed at 11:30 and we will return to Milwaukee at approximately 12:30 p.m. If you have packed a lunch, we can have our meal at the Zen Center in Milwaukee.

As for the visit to the prison on Monday, Oshkosh has given permission, but I still have no information from the Waupun prison. If you cannot go with me to Waupun this afternoon, you can wait for me at the public library near the prison. Please come here at 7:00 a.m. because we cannot depart later than 7:30 a.m. The drive takes one hour and forty—five minutes.

Do not bring the packed lunches because there is no place for us to eat (I do not want to sit in a car while the weather is cold with snow falling and our meals turn into ice.) We can stop at the McDonald’s restaurant in Waupun and buy a salad with vinegar (without meat) and a can of soda.

The Oshkosh prison is a medium security prison and the group of prisoners there is about eight to twelve people. Waupun is a prison with strict maximum security and the group has only nine people. The Dharma talk at Oshkosh is from 9:30 a.m. until 11:30 a.m. and then we drive to Waupun, have lunch, and give lectures at Waupun from 1:00—2:30 p.m. We return to the Zen Center no later than 4:30 p.m. For these two Dharma talks, you do not need to wear your special yellow robe. I wear my normal clothing (called the brown dress of the Japanese Temple). We only wear our yellow robes for important events in prison like Precept Ceremonies or Observance (Uposatha) day. Remember to bring your passport and don’t bring anything with metal inside of it because we have to go through a screening machine before entering the prison.

We will follow the usual program:

Meditation — thirty minutes (We do not have a cushion or meditation set. We will use chairs instead.)

Walking meditation — only at Oshkosh prison because

there is no large room.

Chanting — (Compassion Sutra, Heart Sutra)

Dharma dialogue and answering questions (Life of Dajian Hui—neng, the Sixth Patriarch of Chan (Zen)

By the way, please remember tomorrow’s meeting at the Interfaith Conference Office on the second floor at 1442 Farewell Road, in Milwaukee. I sincerely apologize for being unable to pick you up. I have a lecture at the University in the north and after returning here to change and guide the volunteers reporting to our editorial office, it will leave me with no time to do so. I selected sixteen of the twenty—four proverbs that you sent me and made several copies, so that everyone can join at the same time with the illustration. I hope you remember the time in advance and I will inform you if anything changes at the last minute.

Best regards.

                                             ***

On October 23, 2007,

Ven. Tonen Sara O’Connor and I had a Dharma talk at Green Bay Correctional Institution, a maximum—security prison. The prisoners confined there have committed the most serious crimes, mostly murder, armed robbery, rape, and other very violent crimes.

While at Green Bay I met a thirty—two—year—old American man named Douglas Stream. His Dharma name is Tojin.

Primarily due to ignorance and immaturity, Tojin took the life of another person and was sentenced to life imprisonment. Tojin appears to be as intelligent and graceful as any other student of Buddhism. Had Tojin not broken the law and killed this person he would have, with his abilities, been able to benefit his family, society, and the country. Tojin told me once that his actions brought a “life sentence without parole” and even if he had made an effort to do well it would be difficult for a court to reduce the charges or his sentence unless there was convincing evidence to do so.

Tojin has studied many Buddhist scriptures available

in the prison library and enjoys the teachings of the Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh. Tojin taught himself how to say “Sakyamuni Buddha” in the Vietnamese language, “Nam Mô Bổn Sư Thích Ca Mâu Ni Phật” to greet me whenever I came to guide him.

From Milwaukee, we drove nearly two hours to Green Bay Correctional Institution, where Tojin is in custody. The rows of red russet leaves are shining brightly along the sides of the road. I admire the arrogance of nature and feel myself blessed to enjoy the beauty of nature while the prisoners are locked up and cannot see the outside world. The windows that are available to the inmates are mostly obscured making it hard to see the beauty of nature.

Tonen is very strong; after lecturing the prisoners and getting back in the car we talked about various topics without stopping for the entire two hours on our return trip to Milwaukee.

Tojin is one of the prisoners who writes me most often. The time it takes for our correspondence to reach each other is two or three days. The correspondence system in the US is very fast and convenient.

Most of my days are spent learning at Milwaukee Area Technical College. Going to college all day is not tiring, but visiting the prisons, especially the maximum— security prisons, I often feel very sad and have a heavy heart. Sitting in the car, it is hard to breathe. I had shortness of breath and sighed continuously. Arriving back at Phuoc Hau Temple, I rested immediately, probably because of the circumstances of the individual prisoners and because the heavy atmosphere there kept haunting me.

1.5.    Reflecting On The Beautiful Minds

Below are some of the typical letters I received from prisoners and my replies to them. The content of these letters shows both the good and the bad in these prisoners. They also show how Buddhist teachings have helped them. These are beautiful minds, like pink lotus flowers rising out of the mud.

1.5.1. Robert Trokan — Buddhist Name Tochiku

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

February 7, 2007

Dear Sư cô¹⁰ T.N. Giới Hương,

I was the guy you met when you visited us at the Racine Correctional Institution. My name is Robert Trokan, my Dharma name is Tochiku. Ven. Tonen gave me this name at the precept ceremony. “Tochiku” means “Trúc Lâm” (Bamboo Forest). Ven. Tonen explained that Trúc Lâm is a symbol of strength and flexibility in all difficult times, so that I can cope and persevere in all circumstances that I find myself dealing with.

I want to tell you a little about myself. I was born and raised in Menominee Falls, Wisconsin. As a child, I made a lot of wrong decisions. I was raised as a Christian, but I doubted this religion. I experienced bad things which were made worse by burying my life in alcohol and opium. This led me to break the law and end up in prison. I have no excuse for my wrongdoing. I take full responsibility for

10. Sư cô is the Vietnamese pronoun which means Venerable or Rever- end Lady Monk.

my actions. I have been in prison for twenty—one years. I was arrested when I was twenty years old and am now forty—one years old.

Ten years ago, I realized the meaning of my life. The way forward for me was clear. I changed my life a lot and no longer harmed people around me. I have been an addict, and thanks to that experience. I have been able to help many other inmates deal with and face their addictions. I remember when I was Catholic, I could not find faith and felt no real sense of purpose. When I was at Green Bay Correctional Institution someone advised me to attend the meditation group guided by Ven. Tonen. I attended once a month and was able to ask her a lot of questions. As time went by, I found a way for myself, and I took refuge. I found balance in my heart and in my relationships with people around me and I always tell myself to be a useful Buddhist for everyone. I really like to meditate and chant the Buddhist scripture.

Ven. Tonen asked me to write a letter to you to discuss the Dharma. I agreed immediately. Ven. Tonen said that you’ve been in the monastery for more than thirty years. What is the monastery like in Vietnam? Were you born and raised in a Buddhist family? Can you tell me about your country, Vietnam? How is life there? What about the United States has surprised you? What is your purpose and what are the bad things you’ve seen in the United States?

I am curious to know your thoughts and feelings on these questions. I have never written or talked to other people different from my culture. I apologize if any of my questions are crude or offensive. Please explain what you can so I can understand more. I would like to stop here.

I’m looking forward to your reply.

Sincerely,

Tochiku

                                            ***

From: Venerable T.N. Giới Hương This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

Hello Tochiku,

In Vietnam, we have only two seasons, the dry season, and the rainy season. This is the first winter I’ve experienced and the first time I’ve seen falling snow. Great! Snow is beautiful and poetic! Snow is bright, white, smooth, and cold like small white cotton flowers. Snowflakes fall on my head and shoulders, and I take them into my palm.

However, when there is too much snow falling, more than ten inches, the snow makes us cold and shiver. On the roads, drivers must concentrate more because the roads are slippery and it’s harder to drive. Roads and vehicles become muddy and dirty. People find it difficult and hard to go out in the snow. This is a new and strange experience that I have never encountered in Vietnam or India.

I am very happy to hear you talk about your meditation practice, walking meditation, and your work. Now Tochiku, tell me about your life, for example, how was your childhood, family, hobbies, education, life in prison? When will you be released from prison?

In the last letter I told you that Vietnamese Buddhists in America are very busy and work hard for their livelihoods. Most people have to go to work and when they come home and clean up they have very little time left; only their weekends are free. They try to arrange time for the temple on Sunday. Moreover, it is very far from one person’s house to another. There must be a vehicle such as a car or bus to go back and forth for transportation. If there is no transportation, it is difficult to go to the temple or visit friends even on weekends.

Here, I don’t know my neighbors because every house is often closed. While in Vietnam or India, cultures I’m more familiar with, every house is open (only at night), so neighbors know each other well.

Vietnamese and Indians also go to work but seem more relaxed and save more time for religion or spirituality. We also have time for each other.

Anyway, every day I get used to this American life. There are many things in this progressive civilized America for us to learn.

May the Buddha bless you. Namo Amitabha Buddha.

 Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

                                      ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

 March 22, 2007

Dear Master Sư cô,

I have just finished reading your letter and the Fourteen Presented Things (14 Điều Tiếp Hiện) by the Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh that you sent. I would also like to thank you for sharing the temple story with me. I always enjoy learning about life inside of monasteries.

I am very happy that you explained these things to me. I would like to know how I should address you. I want to follow and respect you according to the temple culture. I would also like to know what spiritual practice means to you.

I have read the Fourteen Presented Things of the Venerable Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh and my favorite is the fourteenth thing: “Do not avoid suffering or close your eyes to the suffering of others. Don’t lose awareness of the existence of suffering in this secular life. Look for ways to approach suffering beings in the form of visits, images, sounds, etc. In this way, we awaken others to the existence of suffering in this world.”

                                         ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Dear Teacher Giới Hương,

I am the type of person who likes to reflect. I often contemplate about many things—education, faith, and philosophy. I often raise questions to Ven. Tonen during our talks. I am always thirsty for knowledge and believe that learning is an active experience, not passive. I hope you understand what I mean.

I was happy to hear from Tonen that you are going to school to get a degree in psychology at UWM [University of Wisconsin, Milwaukee]. I studied similar subjects at this school many years ago. I think our interests in psychology are similar, is this a coincidence? So, if you have any questions or want to discuss any topics related to psychology, please let me know. I am very pleased to help you.

At the end of your letter, you asked me some very good questions. I will try to answer each one:

1. Vegetarianism: Ven. Tonen once told me about the In a period of drought, vegetables could not be grown and when the Buddha went out for alms he received only fish (non—vegetarian). The Buddha had to accept it and eat it to follow the five rules: 1. not seeing,
2. not hearing, 3. not suspecting, 4. not inciting people to kill animals for our meat, 5. and eating animals that die And so, eating animals according to these five ways is not a transgression. Do you know this story? I eat fish, but not much meat because I don’t have a choice here. When I’m free and released from prison, I will find and choose other nutritious foods. I would like to know your opinion about this.

Religion: My whole family is Christian. I have always been taught about the faith of God. In my youth, I had forgotten my faith and did not believe in my religion at all. My spiritual life was broken. I was addicted to alcohol and drugs. When I came to jail, I decided to change my life, change my behavior, change my faith, and this is when I found my faith. I have found balance and peace in my heart.

I studied and researched many different religions. Finally, while reading the Buddhist scriptures, I found resonance in my heart. Do you understand what I mean? I have a feeling that I have come back to my roots or that Buddhism has become a part of me. It was during this time that I was awakened a great deal by this faith.

My future plans: I have been imprisoned for a long time. Every year I have to go to the parole board to see if I will be released. The longest time that that the prison can hold me is until 2017, (ten years from now). I hope to be released sooner. I will go to the parole board in April and seek my release at that time.

I’ve thought about my future for years, while I was miserable here in prison, and I began to wonder what this journey I was on meant. I have found the answer and understand that I need to find a way in which I can make my own life experiences useful. So, I began to enroll in college correspondence courses (distance learning). I began to spend a lot of time volunteering to help other people, hoping to change the lives of fellow inmates in groups, as well as in classrooms. I have been doing this for years. When I leave prison, I will find a means or a job related to helping others. This is what I believe I’ll do. Some staff who work here as psychologists and social workers think I am very capable. They say I have innate talents that enable me to reach out and help others. For this reason, I hope to have the opportunity to do this in the near future.

                                        ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Dear Master Giới Hương,

I bring you two poems I’m quoting from an elder nun

(in the Therigatha):

Cover the sun

With pure soul No worldly debt

Enjoy a spiritual realm.

 Forget how troublesome

Examine yourself Above, below

Equal with all ages And honesty.

 Find the cherished peaceful realm Never redundant

Full of strange things Like a full moon Round, so round

The bright moon

Tear off.

A Deep Night

I, a nun who practices, knows how to control, self— calm,

enlightened, and a pure bodhisattva.

Like when we grow up

Our mind is filled with happiness

Bring it everywhere to be happy forever Destroy the night

And death

Into nothingness.

I hope good things always come to you. Bows and smile,

Tochiku,

Racine Correctional Institution

                                   ***

From: Venerable T.N. Giới Hương This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

March 27, 2007

Hello Tochiku,

I appreciate what you shared with me in your letter. There is a Vietnamese saying, “A challenging husband or wife can transform us into philosophers.” According to my view, prison with its disturbances and sorrows is also a good place to nurture Bodhi mind. Don’t think too much about what you did in the past. That’s just what it is, the past. You’re going to have regrets; you just need to promise not to do it anymore. You should mindfully stay in the present moment.

I thank you for the poem by the “Elder Nun” that you sent. I was ordained and lived in the temple when I was fifteen years old. The nature of life and phenomenon are impermanent, non—self, suffering, and empty. Human nature is encompassed by birth, existence, change and disappearance. This body will then dissolve. This makes me want to find a more true, sustainable, pure, and liberating path of happiness.

Under the pureness of monastic life, it helps me spread my arms to love everyone without the distinction of race, relatives or not, skin color, religion or nationality ... so in my free time I learn about many role models, saints, philosophers, and Zen Masters whose lives are exemplary like lighthouses leading us. This is my direction.

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Ven. T.N. Giới Hương

                                                  ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

March 29, 2007

Dear Master T.N. Giới Hương,

Thank you for your sincere advice. You’re right, prison is a good place to cultivate spirituality, but it is a difficult place to express Buddha’s nature or compassion. I admire your decision to become a nun. Prison life made me feel like I was living in a monastery, but it was not my choice. I like the love between man and women as a strong expression of emotions, enjoyment, and intercourse. I crave it a lot. Even in times of intercourse with my wife, our true feelings and trust for each other are exposed. I remember my wife’s tender affectionate embrace while together. Suddenly waking up, I knew I was dreaming. I have to let that dream go. Although knowing the emotion is illusory, it is sometimes difficult to control.

You asked about psychology. Yes, I study under a distance learning system so all classes are through paper correspondence. I learned about the relationship between psychology and cognitive processes to understand why I could think and feel what I do. Knowledge of this subject is important when we want to help others. When we understand people it is easier for us to help them. This is an interesting science.

I love learning psychotherapy and practicing daily. I am currently treating a person who is suffering from mental symptoms (slow learning, developmental delay). This person was accused of being lewd. This is a big challenge and requires a lot of time, I have to be patient when helping him. Some are disgusted by his actions but I still choose to help him.

I hope that you will come here regularly to teach meditation to our group of prisoners. Please let us know when you are able to come. Your letters are like sunlight that erases the clouds that surround us and warms our souls. We are indebted to you for your concern for us.

Take care,

Tochiku Racine Correctional Institution

                                           ***

From: Venerable T.N. Giới Hương This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

April 30, 2007

Hello Tochiku,

Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh said, “The biggest fear of people is that when we die, we become nothing.” We believe that from nothing we are born and when we die we will return to nothing. And so, we are always afraid this state of destruction will come to us. The Buddha has a very different view of this, which is that death and life are just thoughts in our consciousness. They aren’t an entity that we can grasp. He said that living and dying are like taking off a shirt: just as we can take off an old shirt and put on a new one, life and death are simply transitions, not separate or final events.

As in your situation, look at the prison as a means of practice and if you are optimistic with that thought, you will see that prison is an ideal place to cultivate the mind (for example, if people in society are too busy with business, it’s hard to have the time and environment to practice as you can in prison). Always keep your heart up. What comes will come and be gentle, let the delusion disappear. Think of yourself as an actor and surround yourself with the audience. Ten years from now is just a breeze, reside in your present existence, and consider that you are breathing well, more than sick patients or the dead.

I appreciate and understand your transformation as a Buddhist. What you wrote to me is the truth, your real life—an imperfect but very real person, rather than hearing exaggerations from someone who considers himself perfect. We are human, of course, we cannot avoid mistakes. Knowing our errors, we don’t repeat them.

There was a girl student, a lay disciple of the five precepts who took refuge under me. One day, she played with a gun and accidentally shot her sister in the heart. The sister died instantly in the city of Kenosha, Wisconsin. Now she has been deported to Vietnam to live forever. We should not play with dangerous weapons like guns. You are also luckier than those two sisters.

Best of luck to you, Tochiku.

Ven. T.N. Giới Hương

                                               ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha

May 9, 2007

Dear Teacher Giới Hương,

When I speak of the past, I become sad. I have understood the consequences of my crimes for a long time. I hurt and destroyed so many people around me. Because of this, I sometimes think that I will never recover. But thanks to the Dharma, I have begun to live more optimistically and have a kinder heart towards the people around me. I want you to believe that I will live well in this life until the day I close my eyes. Perhaps the good things I am doing are not only to compensate for the past but also to build my life in the present. I hope you understand what I mean.

The end result of my life hasn’t been determined. I still have karma that will manifest based on my present actions. I am very happy to share with you about my life to add ideas and make a great contribution to the book you are writing and also to help readers avoid the bad habits that I have experienced.

I remember that at the age of eleven or twelve I began to use alcohol and drugs with older friends. When I was eighteen, I started robbing the bosses’ drugs. One day, another guy and myself robbed a drug dealer. The story began to evolve, and an accomplice friend of mine took a woman hostage while we got away from the scene. Then he raped her. I was caught and arrested.

Even with all of this, I was not scared or deterred.

Years later when I was twenty—seven years old, my drug and alcohol use became worse. At this time, I was working as a shopkeeper, buying and selling things. I suffered frequent losses. Once I sat at home drinking alcohol until I was drunk, and I set out to do a terrible thing, burglary. I burglarized three houses. The third time, I was so drunk, when I went to steal I forgot to wear gloves, so I left my fingerprints at the scene, and so, I could be tracked down by the police as the culprit. I didn’t know what to do, so I put gasoline around the people’s house and burned the house to destroy the evidence. The house burned completely. As a consequence, the people lost their home and their lives were harmed. This was all because of my addictions and stupid choices. These people did not deserve to be hurt and have their property lost because of my actions.

I was arrested and sentenced to thirty—seven years in prison. Finally in 1995 at the age of thirty, I decided that I didn’t want to continue to ruin my life and I begged the people in the prison to help me with my addictions. I knew I would have to learn to control myself on this challenging journey. I began to understand the Dharma and this quest led me to Buddha’s door. I am happy to continue on this path.

When I write to you, my heart hurts every time I think of the pain I had brought to others, and to my own family. It was because of this pain that I caused that I became inspired to be an honest person to help those around me.

Tochiku

Racine Correctional Institution

                                ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Dear        Teacher        T.N.        Giới        Hương,

Now you know who I am, and that I was once rebellious.

I have changed a lot over the last twelve years, but the past is still the past. I hope you forgive and accept me. I bow respectfully and thank you for patiently listening to my sinful past. I thank you for your generosity and love for me. Thank you, Master, for bringing me joy in this time of loss and suffering.

Tochiku

Racine Correctional Institution

                                                     ***

From: Venerable T.N. Giới Hương This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

October 22, 2007

Dear Tochiku,

This October, the Ven. Tonen and I went to visit several prisons, Waupun, Oshkosh, Dodge, Taycheedah, and Green Bay. The day Tonen visited Racine I was unable to attend and meet you because I was guiding a retreat at Thien An Temple, Minnesota. In the coming year, Tonen will schedule our visits so they alternate. For example, Tonen will visit one time and l will visit the next. This will be possible because now I am familiar with the procedures and I can go alone. I look forward to meeting you. Our visits will consist of a group meeting in the morning, a lecture, and in the afternoon an individual consultation, or personal talk.

Yesterday morning we visited Green Bay Correctional Institution. This is a maximum—security prison. I met sixteen prisoners and in the afternoon, returned for a personal contact consultation, (pastoral visit). On the way back, after leaving Green Bay, I became really sad. I met a Buddhist prisoner named Tojin, who is serving a life sentence. In one moment of ignorance and delusion Tojin shot and killed another person. Tojin now must be confined and live with this regret for the rest of his life.

I recalled the five very important precepts of the Buddha. The first is not to kill. The second is not to steal, the third is not to lie, the fourth is not to drink (or use intoxicants), and the fifth is not to commit adultery. If only everyone knew how to keep these five basic precepts there wouldn’t be a need for prisons. If Tojin knew how important this precept was and had he held it sacred he wouldn’t be serving this life sentence.

It is autumn now; the leaves have turned yellow. Outside the prisons the yards are covered with yellow leaves. The northern and eastern states of the United States are covered in a reddish—brown russet color in the fall, while in the winter, they are covered in snowflakes. This fall, looking at the sky, there are often a lot of geese flying back to the warm places in the south, like Florida and even Mexico. They often land in Wisconsin parks to rest and find food, then fly again. Ven. Tonen said that because places in the north, like Canada, freeze, the geese have to fly away. When the spring winds begin to blow to the north, they begin to fly back to Canada.

With the inherent inner nature of Buddha mind, these heavenly birds also know how to create beautiful flying shapes with many appearances in the sky, for example, flying in a straight line, three rows, V—shaped, or flying in pairs. Sky birds often fly in flocks rather than flying alone. Whenever a bird flies away from the flock, it quickly finds a way back to its flock. Staying with the flock helps it quickly reach its destination. When the lead bird is tired, it will fly around and take a position in the back. The other birds understand that they will eventually take their place as the leader. The noises of the birds at the back of the flock encourage the others to eagerly fly faster. The fluttering of the birds behind is an important encouragement to move forward.

If a bird is injured, two or three other birds will fly out of the flock and hold a position behind the injured bird to help protect it. They will often land on the riverbank or the empty forest next to the injured bird and wait for the bird to recover or die. They will then join another flock until they can catch up to their own flock.

People are like these heavenly birds. If we know how to share our feelings with the community, with others, we will reach our goals faster, because we support and protect each other. There is a Vietnamese saying, “One tree cannot make a forest; three trees together can make a forest.” (Một cây làm chẳng nên non, ba cây chụm lại nên hòn núi cao).

It is so beautiful. When I saw the birds flying freely in the sky in many shapes, I remembered you, Tochiku and Tojin and others imprisoned in their narrow rooms.

When I returned to Phuoc Hau Pagoda, a sadness was attached to my heart forever. Perhaps this is the reason why I promised to join Ven. Tonen in teaching at these prisons.                                                 

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Ven. T.N. Giới Hương

                                                           ***

1.5.2 James Lala

Namo Amitabha Buddha. Hello Sư cô,

Sorry for not writing more often. In your last letter you said you were writing a book, A Buddhist Nun and American Inmates, and asked me how I came to know about Buddhism in prison and what led me to prison?

Actually, I’ve had many problems that are hard to overcome. That’s why I write to you. Let me talk about my past, then you will understand what I mean, you will guess what I did before.

I had a problem in 1977 [I think that is supposed to be 1997]. I had sex with my fifteen—year—old cousin when I was twenty—one years old. Eight months later I was arrested and sentenced to seven years in prison. In 2003, I was released with a suspended sentence which was in place to prohibit me from going online to view porn—related material. In January of 2005, I went online and downloaded pictures of young girls that were sexually suggestive. The charge was for storing pornographic images of children while I was on probation. I fought the charges but was detained for nine months and twenty— two days.

I received your letter about your book at this time. I was then released and free for a week, but I again went to the internet to access erotic images. Now I might be in prison for a year or two or more. My problem is not being able to control my will to stop going online and longing to look at girls’ images. I know it’s a mistake and that as a Buddhist I shouldn’t even think of women, but I’m already infected.

What can stop me from having these sexual desires about women? How can I transform my sexually inappropriate behavior? When I see a beautiful girl in a pretty revealing outfit, I am immediately attracted. What visualization method can help me overcome these desires? I don’t want to repeat these offenses and go in and out of prison repeatedly. I hope that you may have some suggestions that can help me. Thank you for your concern.

James Lala

Port Washington, Wisconsin

                                                                       ***

1.5.3.  David Rustad

December 20, 2007

Dear Sư cô Giới Hương,

I am happy to help you anytime you need. Thank you, Teacher, for giving me some Buddhist books which are very useful and valuable. My camp is very crowded, but the camp is old. Because it is too crowded, it is not easy to have a quiet moment to meditate. However, I also arranged early morning hours to meditate. Now I practice seriously with good guidance.

Thinking back to the beginning, I attended the course and was curious about other religions (I am Christian) and I became more interested in the proper teachings of the Buddha, the Buddha’s compassionate smile, the generous smile of Dalai Lama. When I read more, I began to understand the basis of the Four Noble Truths (the Four Arya Satyas) of life, including a truth that I cannot deny, that is suffering. The truth of life is summarised in these four truths.

I was born in Wisconsin and grew up as a Christian, but one thing I see in Christianity is more fairy tales than realistic teaching about the truths that exist in life.

Then wine brought me here and I was arrested for driving when drunk. This prison has a very good teaching program to help us not repeat it again. I hope to be free at the end of April this year and I want to visit you when I have the opportunity.

Going back to writing your book, A Buddhist Nun and American Inmates, just tell me what I can do, I’ll be ready to help you complete the book.

David Rustard

                                                                  ***

January1, 2008

Dear Teacher T.N. Giới Hương,

I thank you for your great poem. I was imprisoned for nine months and will be free around April, which means I was released before a few months in a one and half—year sentence. Thanks to my participation in the alcohol and drug prevention training class, My sentence was reduced. I see most of the concepts of this class are very similar in the Buddhist scriptures. This made me very excited.

The last time I was arrested the night before Christmas in 2006, I drank too much, I didn’t remember what happened at that time and was told later. The people in the truck that my car hit were all injured, but not very heavy. I was arrested four times for driving when I was drunk, so I was sentenced to six years in prison. Suddenly, my wife left me about February 2006. It is true, “Disaster does not come once.” I also lived wandering for a long time and then I went back to my drinking habit and became an alcoholic without knowing.

I had to sell the house to pay for my accident. When I get out, I have to stay in my brother’s house. There are some prisoners here who have been sentenced almost two years like me, and many other prisoners have longer sentences (eight years ...), depending on the driver’s alcohol and the level of damage. But it is worth our life anyway. There are some prisoners here who have been arrested seven, nine, ten times or more but are not afraid of driving when drunk. This shows the terrible power of alcohol. Now I have decided to become a good Buddhist, aligning with the inherent goodness of the Buddha mind.

David Rustard

                                       

January 16, 2008

Hi David Rustard,

I am glad for you to be free in April, after more than eighteen months of imprisonment. In Milwaukee, I have a seventy—five—year—old American friend called Ven. Tonen Sara O’Connor. She often visited the prison in Wisconsin to guide meditation and Dharma talks. She has engaged in this holy work for ten years. Ven. Tonen is older but still very healthy. Sometimes I and Ven. Tonen visit correctional camps in Waupun, Oshkosh, Dodge, Taycheedah, Greenbay, and Racine. In these prisons, there are many inmates who take refuge in the Three Jewels and practice meditation. This is a method of mindfulness that is quite popular in Asia and America.

If an offender requires spiritual guidance in the Buddhist tradition, inform the camp chaplain, who will then invite us to come. Please invite any friends in the prison who share the same intention, and we can all gather together.

Hoping in the next letter, you will tell me what the prison scene looks like? How many prisoners are there? Have some people undergone meaningful transformation?

Wishing you a happy New Year. The Asian New Year is in February of the lunar calendar. All Vietnamese people gather to celebrate regardless of religion. The New Year is called Tết. Tết is everyone’s New Year. Wishing for you to always feel peace in the Dharma. Also, I offer a Vietnamese Tết card to you.

Enjoy the Lunar New Year!

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Ven. T.N. Giới Hương

                                                           ***

February 10, 2008

Dear Sư cô Giới Huong,

Do you think there is any way to organize the Taking Refuge for us in this prison? I want to know if you can do this here or if I have a chance to go to your temple to take refuge? My place is an old prison in Wisconsin and there are about 300 prisoners here. As far as I know, until now,

1. H. inmate and I am Buddhists. I am not sure about this, anyway, because J. H. is on a different floor than me, but on occasion I will ask J. H. to see if he wants to receive and organize the Taking Refuge Ceremony or not.

Every prisoner here must focus on learning how to conduct themselves in different circumstances of life to help us see the right and wrong things on what we have done (drinking alcohol, smoking drugs). I often see many examples in Buddhist philosophy. If I had known this before, I would not have been imprisoned like this.

Anyway, I had the opportunity to be a good person and make up for the past mistakes. I will try to learn Buddhism. I found myself to have the predestination with Buddhism and Ven. Giới Huong, a beautiful and noble Vietnamese nun. There are many prisoners here who also support me in Buddhism, but there are also prisoners who think I’m a crazy guy.

Later, I grew up and decided on the religion that I found appropriate. I had just finished reading a book titled Buddhism published in 1969. Good book because it explained how I thought about Buddhism, but when I read about the meditation, I had a headache (yes, where I have to read it over and over again!).

I do not know if you have a Dhammapada, if so, please send one to read. As far as I know, this book is cited by many Buddhist scholars in their writings.

David Rustard

Detox Rehabilitation Center Winnebago, Wisconsin

                                                                        ***

January 28, 2008

Dear David Rustard,

I was happy to hear that you decided your own way of studying after going through a period of self—study of many religions. Your “Dhamma’s chosen” reminds me of the famous Buddha’s sermon that he taught to the Kamala tribe as follows:

“Now, Kalamas, don’t go by reports, by legends, by traditions, by scripture, by logical conjecture, by inference, by analogies, by agreement through pondering views, by probability or by the thought, ‘This contemplative is our teacher.’ When you know for yourselves that these qualities are skillful; these qualities are blameless; these qualities are praised by the wise; these qualities, when adopted and carried out, lead to welfare and to happiness then you should enter and remain in them.”¹¹

Ancient people often teach, “I will not be awakened for thousands of years, more than a minute of mistakes. Lâm Tế Patriarch taught that “One thought is departed from, the earth is far away.” If we choose the wrong path that is not righteous, then it is difficult to return to it. The Buddha encouraged us to have right view and right thought

11. Kalama Sutta: “To the Kalamas,” translated from the Pali by Thanis- saro Bhikkhu. The Aṅguttara Nikaya I of the Tipiṭaka. https://www.ac- org/tipitaka/an/an03/an03.065.than.html

in order to find a path for us and he once again confirmed

that “Believe me but not understand me as a slander.”

What the Buddha went through, he compassionately left: “I am the guide of my own experience.”

Wishing you to enjoy the path of liberation.

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Ven. T.N. Giới Hương

                                                                                 ***

1.5.4.   Pete McCredie

January 20, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

Thank you for sending the interesting letters and Buddhist scriptures to me. Thank you for giving us the address in Taiwan to ask for the scriptures. Yes, they sent me books in early 2007. I am very grateful. My limited Buddhist knowledge is learned from my brother—in— law. My brother—in—law is more focused on spiritual practice than “debate.” I was very lucky to know about Buddhism from childhood but still not very clear. This year, I am forty—five years old. I studied medicine at the University of Wisconsin, Madison, and Colorado Medical University. I worked for a drug institute.

I was in jail on June 23, 2006 and will be released in May, this year. I was imprisoned for the crime of possessing heroin and was arrested again during the time of the penalty. This is a pretty serious crime in this country. That’s why I’m still in prison. Now, I’m going to be free.

I was at the Redgranite Correctional Camp in the west of Oshkosh, about fifty miles away, where there are about 1,000 prisoners. There are not many Buddhist practitioners, but at Greenbay Prison there is a Buddhist class every month organized by Ven. Tonen Sara O’Connor.

It’s very noisy here but I try to practice “letting go” in the early morning when starting a new day. There are disputes among offenders (because of different customs, races, gangs, culture, religion, preconceptions), but I avoid getting involved. I kept the mind fresh and gentle in this dark miserable place.

If you have any questions about prison life for your book, A Buddhist Nun and American Inmates, please ask and I will try to answer it all. I hope to be released soon. If possible, I will come and see you at your temple.

Please take care!

Pete McCredie

                                                                 ***

Dear Taiwan Pure Land Buddhist Association,

We wrote this letter at the request of our nun Venerable Dr. Thích Nữ Giới Hương at Phước Hậu Temple, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, near where I lived (before being imprisoned). I enjoyed learning about Buddhist life. I only know a little bit and practice. Prisoners often ask how I can keep calm in the middle of a prison environment filled with oppression, hatred, repression, and despair. I am happy to share my limited knowledge of Buddhism to them.

I hope the Taiwan Pure Land Buddhist Society can

give us some Buddhist books in English we can refer to for practicing Buddhist methods and teachings as a form of ideal life for the existence of nonviolent life (although I am still too inferior to perform this ability). I have read many books to help me realize the true simplicity of Buddhism, summed up as “compassion comes from understanding.”

If the Association can help me, I will be very grateful. Please send us the books on practice methods in English. How can the Association submit books that help minimize our costs? We are extremely grateful.

Thank you for your support.

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Pete McCredie

                                                                        ***

February 3, 2008

Dear Venerable Dr. T.N. Giới Hương,

We received this letter from an offender you referred. We also sent to his correctional camp a parcel with English books including EN025, EN049, EN158 (3pic.). If you want to send them more, you can wait after the parcel arrives. Thank you.

Ju Yih Tsuen

Taiwan Pure Land Buddhist Association

                                             ***

1.5.5.  Daniel Kevin Dannells

— Buddhist Name Tosetsu

December 10, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

You asked me who I was in the group of prisoners last week. I am a stubby prisoner, sitting to the left of the Buddha altar and to your left. I am the only one who keeps the bell (awkwardly) when we meditate or chant. During the talk session, I also used to ask questions for you to answer. Hope you remember me. Thank you for compassionately praying for my mother and sister—in— law who just died. Hopefully, the time will pass and like on the rotation wheel that sadness will subside and vanish.

Yes, I took refuge in Dodge Prison a few years ago with Ven. Tonen Sara O’Connor and my Dharma name is Tosetsu.

Personally, I have lived in Dodge Prison and Wisconsin Prison since 2001 and this October is six years. I hope that I will be here for at least two years and hope that until being released will be moved to the medium security. I still have to be in jail until 2034 before being released. Hopefully, I learned many things in the prisons.

Thank you for allowing me to call you Sư cô T.N. Giới Hương (in Vietnamese language). I am very happy to hear Ven. Tonen sharing her work with you and hearing you will visit us more often. I strongly advise you to visit Dodge Prison by yourself because there are many East Asian prisoners there. I think your presence will increase their benefits and beliefs. I really want you to visit me whether it is a group guide or a personal consultation. I hope it happens soon.

I have included two articles, “Why Do I Go to Buddhism.” I hope both articles answer all your questions for the book being written, A Buddhist Nun and American Inmates. If you have any questions about life in prison, please feel free to ask and I will try to answer.

Tosetsu                 

Waupun Correctional Institution

Waupun, Wisconsin

PS, I forgot to say thank you for sending me the beautiful Vietnamese New Year card.

                                                                    ***

1.5.6.   John Halka

December 24, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

Firstly, I would like to thank you for the books you sent me. Your goodness will help me gather lots of Buddhist knowledge and ideas. I have many problems to ask you about. I just started studying the Buddhist teachings. Until now, I have never believed in religion. When I was in prison, Buddhism made me excited and I found out that I could live in Buddhism.

I was arrested for robbery. I was a very successful entrepreneur until I started using drugs and became so addicted that I lost my career and relationships with my relatives. I became a homeless person. One day, I broke into a hunter’s cabin to sleep overnight and get a gun. I stole that gun so I could finish my life. But I was found and arrested for robbery and was sentenced to five years in prison. That’s why Ven. T.N. Giới Hương meets me here.

I am very happy to know that you like reading and writing books. Me too. In fact, I am writing a book about my past life as a successful businessman with a happy family. I am very pleased with what I am writing. Like you, writing books is my pleasure hobby.

Currently, I have spent two and a half years in prison. In three months I will be sixty years old. Wisconsin correctional camps have a rehab program. If the addicts finish the course, they will receive a reduced sentence and be released soon. This program is very stressful and when I enroll, I will be very busy. I want to understand what “three jewels refuge” means. After I am free, I want to visit your temple and learn about the Buddhist ethics every week.

John Halka

Drug Abuse Correction Center Winnebago, Wisconsin

                                               ***

January 16, 2008

Hi John Halka,

The temple life is quiet and deeply meaningful. Our role as nuns is to guide and support others on the path to the Buddha’s liberation. The Buddha, like us, was a human being who shared the wisdom gained from his own spiritual journey. To transform suffering, we must follow that path. The love of nuns extends to all, not only within our small community but to all beings and all forms of life.

My ten years in India were precious to me. During that time, I gained a deep understanding of Indian culture, education, the country, and its religions, with a particular focus on the history of Buddhism. I hold those years in great reverence and cherish them immensely.

The taking refuge ceremony means that we pray to become the Buddha’s disciples, promise to keep the five basic precepts of lay Buddhists to become a good and useful person. I have included a lecture on refuge for you to consult.

I hope to know more about the prison where you are. How many prisoners are there? Do they know Buddhism? If John and the offenders want, I will go to the prison to offer guidance regularly. You should ask permission from your chaplain. After being released from prison, you can visit my temple. You are always welcome!

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Ven. T.N. Giới Hương

                                                       ***

1.5.7.  Douglas Stream — Buddhist Name Tojin

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

November 21, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

Thank you very much for your letter and the beautiful post cards of the temples in Vietnam. I always look for symbols and the postcard with the tree and all its exposed roots was really meaningful. It reminded me of the Buddha’s teachings. The numerous branches and leaves make me think of the 84 thousand teachings that convey the Buddha’s liberating Dharma.

Now to answer some of your questions. I have a job as a painter. I paint the cells. This is a very old prison and the cells have probably been repainted a dozen times. It takes some patience to scrape off the old paint, fill all the holes created by both time and the previous occupants, but the end result is worth it. I get paid .26/hour (26 cents) which is about $32 a month. This money will help me buy the things I need to use such as soap, toothpaste, paper, and stamps. We have a commissary here that sells everything we need from hygiene items to food to greeting cards. In addition, they have a chapel here that gives us cards to send out to our friends and families.

We are not allowed to use computers or go online to websites. We are allowed personal property, such as televisions, electric typewriters, radios, fans, books, and personal clothing. The picture we took with Ven. Tonen Sara O’Connor, you, and me last month here at the prison costs $1.60 each.

To your question about my sentence. I was sentenced to life in prison with parole eligibility after fifty—five years, the year 2051. This will remain unchanged unless I obtain a new trial or a sentence modification. These things are unlikely unless there is some new evidence or new factors that would warrant such an action.

All I can do is worry about the present, continue to maintain my good behavior and have goodwill towards all and continue to grow into a better person. I currently participate in a program to speak to and advise troubled youth that are brought into the prison because they are making bad decisions. This is very rewarding. I also try to donate things I’ve made to charity. I don’t do these things to accumulate merit, I’m just hoping to benefit others, after all the harm I’ve caused.

I honestly try not to dwell on my sentence or the fact that I may never get out of here. There are times when I’m disappointed and depressed about my situation but since I’ve started studying and practicing Buddhism these feelings have diminished. I’ve come to care about the plight of those around me and give my attention to helping who I can, and this has made me feel that this is where I’m supposed to be at this moment.

I have a few questions for you. Are there many non— Vietnamese people who come to your temple? Do you have any English—speaking ceremonies? Do you have services or rituals every day? I lived and grew up on Tenth Street and Lincoln Avenue, Milwaukee, near your temple.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Are there any similar holidays in Vietnam? Mostly on this day, people express their gratitude to everyone and celebrate a special feast of turkey and other traditional foods.

I want to thank you again for you and Ven. Tonen Sara O’Connor coming here to teach the Dharma. The teachings of the Buddha are essential in this world, especially in our prisons.

I’ve enclosed a photo of myself along with some projects I made in the cabinetmaking class. I was in the class as a student and tutor for about six years. One of the most important things I learned in there working with wood and with people, is patience. (Could you tell me how to say “patience” in Vietnamese?) This is a very good environment to practice patience, especially for younger prisoners.

My time spent in the woodshop afforded many opportunities for meditation. It seemed that whatever I was doing became a form of meditation. Being in the class and in a position where I had some responsibility to work with others and teach them gave me an opportunity to apply the Buddha’s teachings such as patience, impermanence, and especially dealing with my perceptions and the perceptions of others. Being in the shop is an activity I enjoy very much. It helped me be mindful and be in a state of peace and harmony. I hope in the near future to be able to return to the shop.

I also stay very busy with several hobbies, painting, crocheting, and drawing. I’ve crocheted several blankets and have sent them to my family. I try to study, work, and stay healthy.

A question before I stop, do you recite the Heart Sutra at your temple? It is a valuable teaching that I like very much.

Tojin

                                                                     ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

November 28, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

A little more about my daily life in here, as far as the food goes. There is a variety of meat, hamburgers, chicken, fish, vegetables, a lot of potatoes, corn, carrots, and a lot of bread. They have a many people to feed so whatever they can do to stretch the food. I was a vegetarian for a year but went back to eating meat. I know this doesn’t align with the Buddha’s teachings, but it’s difficult here. Next week I will send you the original copy of a typical menu for the week.

Here is a schedule of my day:

• 5:30 a.m. Personal hygiene and preparation for
• 5:45—6:30 a.m. Meditation, walking meditation, reciting the Heart Sutra and the Discourse on Lovingkindness
• 6:45 a.m. Breakfast
• 7:00—8:00 m. Watch the news, clean, do laundry
• 8:00—12:30 Work (painting the cells); lunch is at 11:00 m.
• 12:30—1:00 p.m. Return to cell for count
• 1:00—3:00 m. Return to work
• 3:00—4:00 m. Recreation and shower
• 4:00—5:00 m. Relax, write letters, read
• 5:00—5:30 m. Dinner
• 5:30—6:00 m. Watch the news
• 6:00—10:00 m. Free time: watch TV, read, hobbies

I try to meditate for twenty—thirty minutes before going to bed. This schedule varies according to my work. Sometimes we run out of paint, so I have more free time.

Tojin

                                                       ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Dear Sư cô,

I am honored to receive your attention and thank you for your generosity with your time and honesty. When I read your letter, I thought of Verses 76 and 77 of the Dhammapada, Chapter. I respectfully present them to you:

“One should follow a man of wisdom who rebukes one for one’s faults, as one would follow a guide to some buried treasure. To one who follows such a wise man, it will be an advantage and not a disadvantage.” (Dhammapada, Verse 76)

“The man of wisdom should admonish others; he should give advice and should prevent others from doing wrong; such a man is held dear by the good; he is disliked only by the bad.” (Dhammapada, Verse 77)

Since I took refuge in the Three Jewels, I have lived a life of truth and honesty. To be completely honest with you before I found the Buddha—Dharma I lived a life of lies, which only led to more lies. This is a bad direction to take in life.

You asked about the consequences of my crime? I can say that the consequences are still felt today, and I think always will be. Not only the loss of life in my case, but the effect it had on the victim’s family, the surrounding community, and my family will be long—lasting due to my actions, stupidity, and fear. I have a lot of regret for what I put my family through.

I’ve thought a lot about my victim. His name was Ted. I’ve thought about his family and the life he had yet to live. Who knows what lives he could have helped or had a positive effect on. About five or six months ago, I received a letter from Ted’s son saying he had forgiven me for what I did. He wrote to me while he himself was in jail on charges of drunk driving. He described that his life went downhill after his father was killed by me. He explained that he started abusing alcohol and was directing his anger at me. He blamed himself also because he thought he could’ve prevented this from happening.

My actions damaged his life in many ways, and the pain suffered by Ted’s family is immeasurable. The effect on my family has also been immeasurable. I cannot attend any funerals, weddings, or birthdays of my relatives. I’ve missed the opportunity to have a family of my own, get married, and raise children like every other young man. I won’t have the opportunity to watch my niece and nephews grow up. I’ve missed the opportunity to express my filial piety and affection towards my mother, father, sister, and brother. More importantly, I’ve deceived them by letting them think I was a good son, brother, or relative of the family and lineage.

I know they are proud of the great changes I’ve made in my life, but things will never be as they were.

Please feel free to use whatever I write or send to you such as pictures, drawings, letters, etc. for your book, A Buddhist Nun and American Inmates. I’ve learned a lot of good things from Buddhist books and if what I write and share with you is helpful to others then I am honored to be a part of it. I also welcome you, Sư cô T.N. Giới Hương to lead a practice group.

I also have an idea to help your book. I will write sort of a diary every day about my daily thoughts and feelings and how they relate to the Buddha’s teachings and my overall life in prison. I’ll then mail these to you and you can categorize them as you see fit. What do you think?

Your description of the snowfall made me smile with joy. Looking through the small windows of my cell I could see it was snowing outside.

May I give my opinion regarding your neighbors? It seems to me that most people are afraid of what they do not know. Most Americans, for example, when they see a Vietnamese nun or a Vietnamese temple in their neighborhood become curious and may say to themselves, “What are they doing here?” Most Americans don’t know about Buddhism, so they might feel scared. Perhaps you should invite your neighbors or try to explain what your purpose is, maybe in the form of an informational letter, not to try to convert them to your religion, but simply to make them feel comfortable. This is just an idea that can open diplomatic relations with neighbors.

Do you know the Japanese word, “gassho,” which means “palms of the hands placed together.” It is how we greet each other. Is there a Vietnamese word for gassho?

Thank you very much, Venerable T.N. Giới Hương.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha.

Tojin

                                                                          ***

From: Venerable T.N. Giới Hương This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

November 30, 2007

Dear Tojin,

Thank you for sending me the menu. In the United States, even if you are an offender, you are blessed with adequate meals. This is fortunate compared to inmates in other countries.

Thank you also for the idea of keeping a daily diary. What a good idea! It will greatly enrich my book and will also help you look back at yourself in an introverted way and contemplate the Buddha’s teachings. I will send you the mailing fee once a month, because such a fee will be heavy for you.

Regarding the neighbor’s proximity to the temple, I thank you for your interest and feedback. This place is very peaceful. No one has disturbed the place of meditation. I will invite them over for a vegetarian meal at a ceremony and send an invitation. Haiku poetry is very concise. I occasionally write short Vietnamese poetry like Haiku poems.

“Gassho” means “folded two hands.”

Greetings to each other: “King chao Sư cô Chao Tojin” “Sư cô T.N. Giới Hương” in Vietnamese is a respectful

reference to a female monastic.

With metta, (Pali word “metta” means compassion).

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Sư cô T.N. Giới Hương

                                                              ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

December 30, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

When I write about my experiences and feelings, I try not to dwell on the fact that I’m in prison. I try in my writings to think in broader conditions and environments. The teachings of the Buddha recommend that we forget “ourselves” or “the self.” So, I try to think of many points of view. Sometimes the ego shows its ugly face and I suffer the consequences. I have a lot of handwritten material that I need to type and send to you.

I’m currently writing on the topic of anger. This is an extremely important topic in here. There are many things that people, especially prisoners, get easily angered over. Much of the anger is over material possessions. There are constant rule changes that limit our property and this causes great anger. Changes like these happen all the time. It’s hard for some prisoners to take these changes in stride. It’s like your poem: “Goodbye autumn, welcome spring,” change is the law of the universe, impermanence is the law of the universe. We can accept changes, or we can resist changes and create suffering for ourselves. It is entirely our choice. I think I will write an article about anger for the upcoming Sōsaku newsletter.

I’ve been using my free time to crochet. I bought some yarn to crochet a wall panel. I hope to sell it to raise money to help rebuild a temple in China. In the recent Sōsaku newsletter, I wrote about the Second Ancestor’s temple that is under repair. Inmates from our Sangha are trying to raise money for it. This is how I’ve been spending some of my time.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha.

Tojin

                                                ***

 Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Dear Sư cô,

Hope you are well. I’m doing okay. Almost the whole unit has Covid, many people are suffering. So far, I only have a mild case. Well, I think about four—five more emails for chapter one. I hope I’m not going too slow.

Well take care. With metta,

Tojin

                                             ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

March 9, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

I’m looking at the scenery outside through the small space in the window frame. Outside in the prison yard the snow piles are melting, creating little streams flowing into the ground. I’m beginning to sense the faint smell of spring in the wind. I am growing impatient waiting for the warm and sunny season to return. I want to return to the times of the sun and plants, the flowers, and birds. I like to walk barefoot on the grass in the prison yard, it makes me feel like I’m part of nature.

This place really makes one think about opposing forces. I can think deeply about nature, and appreciate the interconnectedness of everything one moment, and the next, think about the sins I’ve committed, the damage I’ve inflicted on myself and others. I think about the merit I will have to accumulate to redeem the mistakes I’ve made in the past. I will have to save many people, animals, and cultivate the blessed spiritual fields to redeem my terrible sin. The pressure and emotion are always motivating me. Without the awakening instructions and the autonomy of Buddhism, the consequences for me would be bad.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha.

Tojin

                                        ***

Namo Amitabha Bhuddha.

March 10, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

You asked if a prisoner’s sentence can be shortened by working hard to do good things? Usually not, but there are programs for certain crimes. There are drug and alcohol programs and earned—release programs. There are situations where a prisoner can petition the court after serving 75—85 percent of their time for an early release. These are rarely granted but when they are they are given to those that complete their programs and have good conduct.

For people with violent crimes like me there really are no programs to earn my way out of prison early. It is my philosophy that I need to accept responsibility for my actions and create a good and positive life in prison. If I’m ever given an opportunity to go back to court, it will show the type of person I’ve become.

There are many prisoners I know that have not had any conduct reports for ten—fifteen years, but this means nothing to the courts unless you are able to find new evidence pertaining to your original case. I have tried to get my sentence reduced three times already and have failed. As for my current situation, I am eligible for parole in 2051. I hope to get my sentence reduced to make me eligible for parole in 2016. This will gain me what my co—defendant has achieved. I think this is my best possible option.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha.

Tojin

                                                    ***

March 13, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

I would like to talk more about why I’m imprisoned. As I explained in the past, the truth is that I was scared and foolish, young, and naive. Prior to me committing this crime, I never really thought about my true nature or imagined I could do such a thing. I was not really grateful for life. I didn’t appreciate the precious value of life. I enjoyed hunting animals, birds and fishing. I treated people with indifference.

I committed this crime when I was twenty years old. The older, more mature version of myself doesn’t understand the fear that the twenty—year—old version of myself felt. At the time, I feared that my co—defendant would harm my family if I didn’t help him kill his foster father. This seems like an excuse now but it was real fear at the time.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha.

Tojin

                                                         ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

March 14, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

There is so much suffering in this world and my abilities are limited. I know that there is a lot of suffering around me, but perhaps the most painful is the suffering of the war that divides the country, as well as the lives of people who are oppressed by their government. I know that compassion means “to suffer with” but it is hard to endure with people who cause their own suffering. I want to help those that suffer at the hands of others. Maybe I’m confused. Perhaps we all cause suffering to ourselves but it’s hard to overlook people that are victims of their circumstances. I feel bad that it has taken me so long in life to realize all of this.

I am trying to help many people stop their suffering by letting them know the peace that is offered in the Buddha’s teachings, as well as sharing my own experiences. My desire to help them comes from my understanding of the source of their suffering. I do this not because I want credit but only wish to try and alleviate their pain. I have the will to do this but it is hard to reach prisoners.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha.

Tojin

                                         ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

March 15, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

I want to tell you about one of my fellow inmates named Joe. I am constantly on Joe’s case, critical of him in a lot of ways. I know it’s probably wrong of me but I only do this because I see that Joe has a lot of potential. Joe is very intelligent and an excellent painter. This is the fourth time that Joe has been in prison, all related to drug problems. Whether Joe steals or assaults someone, it is because of his drug addiction. As a child, Joe had a miserable life. Joe’s father died when Joe was a baby, and Joe’s mother died a few years ago. He also lost an older sister and younger brother. The times that Joe was released from prison he was very pessimistic. For me personally, I have seen the inevitable truth, the power of change! I have told Joe to change his view of life and the way he thinks. Joe has an artistic talent, which makes me sad that he is wasting his time in here.

Joe has developed a pattern of thinking that just because he’s had bad experiences in the past he’s convinced that his future holds nothing but the same. I know other prisoners who think the same way. Many are talented in a certain area but are unable to gain confidence in themselves or are unable to overcome their sinful past and move forward. They are so weak and fall into sin so easily.

Reincarnation and suffering are like this! Namo Sakyamuni Buddha.

Tojin

                                        *** 

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

April 7, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

Thank you for sending me the book, Ten Ways of Training a Buffalo. I have read it before, but your translation has a clearer understanding.

I hope the court will reconsider my case soon and will lower my sentence to make me eligible for parole by 2016. You should remember that this is only a hope, and there is no guarantee. Hopefully, my good deeds and all of the good stuff I’ve been doing since I came to prison will help my cause. I don’t dare to hope too much. I try to live according to reality.

I just sent Ven. Tonen Sara O’Connor a crocheted wall hanging with the words, “Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha” on it. Tonen has raised $850 and will send it along with the wall hanging to the Second Patriarch’s Temple in China. The funds are going to help rebuild the temple. I could hardly believe such a great offering was made. I’m hoping to make a few more items to be able to raise more money for the temple.

Well, finally spring is here. The snow has stopped falling and all melted, opening the ground for the young plants to sprout. Soon we will be allowed to go outside for recreation. The few lilac bushes are about to flower inside the prison. When I was young, my family had a lilac tree in the back yard. My mother loved the little purple flowers.

Tomorrow is the Buddha’s birthday. I read an article by Venerable Thich Thien An, founder of the Eastern Zen Monastery in Los Angeles. He said, “Vesak is Buddha’s birthday; it’s everyone’s birthday.” I will try my best to live up to the Buddha’s example. Thanks for your Vesak poem, very nice:

Cold snow closed the temple gate In the temple warm the incense Everyone has Buddha’s mind

Buddha’s birthday found our true mind.

 Seeing and looking at the snow

Pick up snowflakes to worship Buddha

Buddha’s Birthday at Milwaukee

The lotus garden is full of snowflakes.

Right! In April, it’s still snowing in Milwaukee. The lake surface occasionally freezes. The Buddha’s birthday will be a snowy day in a lotus forest offering Buddha. I wish you all happiness.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha. Descending in the Lumbini Garden.

Tojin

                                          ***

September 3, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

I must have stated that I was not an exemplary prisoner or an ideal Buddhist. I am not a person who has been convicted many times, am not a member of a gang and I am not the same as most of the stereotypes here. I always have strong support from family and friends. This makes me more comfortable physically and mentally in prison. I mean, I have what I need and want. For most of the prisoners around me, they are not so lucky to have this.

Recently I have heard the definition of the word “bliss” is to satisfy the needs of human beings. This is true, especially in prison. Much of the war and conflict in the world is because of fighting for resources. It is the same in prison. When prisoners need and want what they can’t get, there’s no peace. What I mean is that prisoners in the US are different (more knowledgeable) than prisoners in other countries based on their experience reading the news about prisons in other countries. So I think peace in prison is necessary.

I have witnessed many inmates in difficult circumstances, without family help, making no money in prison and no one to talk to. These people suffer from a variety of things, both material and spiritual. I have met many prisoners who are very depressed, insecure, and extremely pessimistic. They easily become brutal and violent to get what they want. Then they became victims of weakness and helplessness. I saw many fights and cruel acts when I was in prison about thirteen years ago. I know of a man who committed suicide. I also heard of brutal acts such as stabbing and raping (same sex) in this prison.

So far, in my experience, prisons are built by people. Depending on the knowledge and practice of each person, the prison may be a hell of dread to avoid or it may be a pure temple for prisoners to practice, relying on the teachings of Buddha to guide us out of ignorance, attachment, and fraud.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha

Tojin

                                    ***

September 4, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

I would like to point out the difference between the words “prison” (jail) and “solitary confinement” (the hole, administrative segregation). Being in solitary confinement is more restricted than in prisons or jail clinics. When I was first arrested I was put in a solitary confinement without windows and with dim light. I stayed there for the whole night. Then I moved to a place with similar criminal prisoners like me. They are awaiting trial by the court. From that first day, everything seemed to lose hope, but then we followed a schedule to go to work all day. After I was sentenced by the court, I was transferred to another place to live with inmates serving time for felonies. In this environment, I first experienced or rather witnessed the brutal situation almost every day. Every prisoner is overly stressed because our future is uncertain. This tension needs to be relieved by targeting other prisoners or staff members to wage war and to explode like “anger at knives but cutting the board in pieces.”

The chaotic conflicts often found in this place are, in my experience, best to avoid. Simply, it is not my business, not interfering with people’s affairs, separating us from the chaos. I personally was not directly beaten. But there are times when battles take place a few feet near me. Based on my experience, I am aware of threats both internally and externally. These threats are more felt by me than when the event actually occurred.

I mean, when I first went to prison or to a jail clinic, I was always afraid of people around me. I was worried about saying the wrong words or doing something wrong. There are certain codes about the rules that most prisoners follow in order to live and it will take some time to understand them. I didn’t spend a lot of time, maybe in just a few years I really realized that fear was no longer necessary, only awareness is important. I find myself frightening myself more than others frightening me. This is a truth for prisoners. Many people put on a tough appearance, but when they face challenges, their weakness becomes evident.

To survive here is simply taking a little time to learn to adapt to the new environment. Friends and relatives were surprised to find that I was well adapted to the prison situation. But there are also very unfortunate prisoners. They have no material and spiritual help in times of depression. This feeling of pessimism and depression is the cause of many problems here.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha.

Tojin

                                            ***

September 9, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

It’s raining outside. The prison yard is like the life of young trees about to bud. The clove has flowered and the grass grows like a velvety green carpet. The field next to where we walked has a nearby fence. Now there are lots of bird eggs. Hopefully, these eggs will be kept intact until the baby is born. Each year the eggs are hatched from the same spot, at least since I came here.

I continued to read and liked the books that you sent. Your PhD thesis from Delhi University of India, “Bodhisattva and Emptiness,” is a treasure that I will continue to study from here. I think it will take some time to gain the profound knowledge to understand the ideas in your book. The main part of my correspondent journalism course is the chapters on karma. I got good grades in the first two exercises.

I am still busy with wall painting work and embroidery hobby. I sent you a gift of the Dharma that I am knitting. I will ask my younger sister or brother—in—law to bring it to Phước Hậu Pagoda. It may take at least a few weeks. I will weave a panel with three words, “Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha” along with the three Buddha images sitting in meditation. The background of the painting is made of different natural colors. I think the yellow of this picture looks the same as your dark yellow robe normally worn when coming to see us. Would you please accept this gift as a reward for your kindness to me and the prisoners here.

Recently, I have often held talks with fellow prisoners. Obviously, I really like the thought of Dharma. The Buddha’s teaching is so effective for me that I regret that my fellow prisoners did not see the magic of the Dharma. This positive also proves that I am an approachable person. Many people come to me for advice, suggestions, and sometimes they don’t like to listen to me but still come back to find me. I know I helped relieve some people and they came back to repay me even more. After all, we are in the same situation. The thing that makes me sad is that I don’t like to think in the same way as others and sometimes I have a hard time explaining my thoughts, even though I know what I want to say. But in the end, my purpose was achieved.

                                               Dear Sư cô T.N. Giới Hương,

Sometimes I realized that I was smarter, more aware, and intuitive than people around me. I realize this is arrogant and driven by a desire to make these feelings a reality. I sometimes feel embarrassed about this but not always.

The “Method of Generating Bodhicitta” in your book is very important to me. I try to remain alert, make vows, and avoid committing errors again.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha.

Tojin

                                                         ***

October 18, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

I thank you for sending me many Buddhist books. I will share them with fellow practitioners at the chapel. I know they are very helpful to us.

Dear Sư cô, we can’t have all the answers about the sufferings of life and furthermore, everyone seems to have their own pain. I want to say I’m not a perfect person. This is really not only difficult to identify weaknesses but also difficult to accept. The Buddha’s teaching worked for me and through this I have helped the lives of many others. One of my obstacles is that I rely on my own way of thinking while helping people. Not everyone here is ready to make any changes. Recently, I was disappointed in a prison friend. He was imprisoned for trafficking of heroin and other smaller crimes. The sins of his life are most likely due to gang members. I spent a lot of time advising him and he promised me to give up everything. But then I saw with my own eyes that he was still connected to the gang members. I am disappointed in him, like some of the other prisoners here, who have the energy to do useful things for this world but choose the wrong path.

Dear Sư cô, I’ve met many prisoners here. Their nature is good but they made wrong decisions, including me! I have also met people who, despite their brutal nature, became honest. I came to the conclusion that the “prison world” is also no different. The ability to direct good or evil is because of one’s own heart. This choice will determine the direction of our life ahead.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha. A lotus offered to you,

Tojin

Ven. Tonen Sara O’Connor, Sư cô T.N. Giới Hương and Tojin (Douglas Stream — a life—sentence prisoner),October 22, 2007, in the visiting room of Greenfield Prison, Wisconsin

                                                     ******** 

Chapter 2

HATRED AND DISCRIMINATION

T

he United States is a diverse country with many ethnic groups, races, languages, religions, and cultures, so it is easy to create complex situations such as

ethnic discrimination.

According to Wikipedia, hate crimes are defined as crimes that are bias—motivated that occur when the perpetrator attacks a victim because he or she is a member of a social group, association, racial group, religion, sexual orientation, disability, ethnicity, nationality, age, gender, gender identity, or political affiliation which the perpetrator does not like, discriminates against, hates, and harbors animosity towards that person.

This discrimination takes many forms such as possible involvement of assault, vandalism, bullying, harassment, verbal abuse, verbal humiliation, or threatening letters that make victims live in anxiety, fear, fragmentation, and distortion of social activities of victims.

The crime of discrimination shows complex and conflicting issues in communities across the country. Unfortunately, racial violence is a more serious problem in the United States than everyone estimates, especially after the September 11, 2001 attack that collapsed the world’s two tallest buildings in New York (World Trade Center), This event led to a rapid increase in racial tension, both in the US and globally. In 2006, up to 7,000 discriminatory offenses occurred in the United States. More than half are racist while 19 percent are religious.

Tojin said, “Nearly half of the prisoners in Greenbay, Wisconsin are Black—less White skin and more Asian yellow skin. When you first get to prison, you may be bullied or raped by an old inmate. Locality, race, and religious groups are also formed here. If you are not clever and avoid them, they will cause the whole group to fight you.”

Newcomers to the jail, once bold and seemingly unafraid of anyone, quickly change after being immersed in the harsh reality of prison life. As they spend time there and are engulfed by the prison’s oppressive atmosphere, their confidence fades, and they begin to fear the other inmates. Any attempt to challenge or even touch a member of a gang would result in a brutal beating by all the gang members.

In the Surangama Sutra,¹² the Buddha taught that we inherently have the same Buddha nature but due to ignorance, ten different types of beings are produced. Then, within the same community, karma unfolded in

 

12. Read details in Rebirth Views in the Surangama Sutra, Bhikkhu- nī Giới Hương, Fifth Edition, NXB Hồng Đức: Tủ Sách Bảo Anh Lạc, 2018, pp 54—89.

countless ways, revealing different individual karmas.

In the community of human karma, it appears as two, three, and many races and a thousand various defilements. From there, you begin to see yourself in contrast to others, recognizing the differences in your paths and experiences. The issue of sectarianism is racial. For example, a guard beats the Black prisoner, the Black group hits the yellow—skin inmates. The yellow group protests ... from racism into discrimination and hatred. If we look back, everyone’s blood is red and tears are salty. We should treat everyone equally regardless of position or skin color.

Understanding this concept of Buddhism, the color of one’s skin in prison or society no longer holds any special significance. It becomes like a vibrant, colorful garden, where yellow and black skin are seen as just as beautiful as the skin of white individuals, and vice versa.

But in fact, discrimination still occurs widely in society because of prejudice and ignorance. Lack of understanding of the cultural differences between ethnic groups and customs has led to fear and a lack of understanding. If not released, these distorted emotions often lead to aggression and will eventually lead to violent discrimination.

Therefore, education from an early age is more likely to guide young shoots than trying to shape “old bamboo.” While still in primary and secondary school, students began to distinguish Vietnamese from Whites, Arabs from Jews, and Hmong from Chinese. If those countries are in conflict, people of one race may develop hatred towards the other and refuse to form friendships.

To avoid this situation, we have to explain to students that people in real life can make friends, even though they belong to different cultural communities. Encourage students to identify things that they like about the friend and continue to see the friend as a separate individual (rather than representing a community).

Racial discrimination, primitive or gross, also occurs within ourselves. There are Vietnamese parents who do not want their children married to people of African descent or other cultural ethnicities. But the lifestyle of freedom and the future decision belongs to the children, so parents must accept to have a daughter—in—law, son—in—law of African descent or other ethnicity. Even children in kindergarten, grades one, two will sometimes tease Asian or Black children in the classroom (bullying). Sometimes they shove classmates—Black or Asian because they think they are filthy dirty or different, refusing to play with them. It is also takes the form of discriminatory and harmful language or abuse that children are exposed to as they grow up, which can lead to violence against others.

In such cases, the family and the school need to emphasize the need for children to have the opportunity to engage in activities in cooperation and to learn from different cultural contexts. While we cannot be sure that an understanding of diversity and antidiscrimination education will prevent children from practicing prejudices that have been learned from family, friends, the community or the media, at least it helps children to think better about other people of different races.

We also sense that some Black, Asian, or ethnic individuals living in American society may harbor a sense of inferiority, as if they are intellectually, socially, or ethnically lesser. For instance, an African American

mother shared that one day she overheard her second— grade daughter saying, “Mom, I wish I could be White like my classmates, and that my family could be completely White like other Americans.” The mother believes it’s important for her children to have a strong connection to their African heritage, and she felt deeply saddened, thinking she had failed in helping them achieve that understanding.

2.1.    Cultural Bias

When I was studying abroad in India and living in the postgraduate women’s dormitory at Delhi University, there were about 400 female students. Of course, our daily meal menu is Indian style. A Chinese friend, whenever she came to the dining room, often brought with her Chinese food. Sometimes Indian friends would invite her to taste Indian food. She shrugged, shook her head, walked away and added, “I want only Chinese food.” I think this is also a discrimination. If you refuse to eat or feel uncomfortable with food from other cultures, it’s important to remain polite and respectful towards others’ food choices. Avoid ridiculing or taking actions that could hurt or offend others. If this friend is studying music in India, she must respect the culture of the country that is helping her. The way we behave must be tactful and subtle, otherwise it is easy to succumb to this cultural bias when we think we are cultured and intellectual.

Living in this multicultural country, when attending a party with a variety of dishes, we don’t need to eat everything, but we should not criticize any of it. A smart way to avoid bias in this situation is to sample each dish slightly, to appreciate the flavors and show gratitude to the hosts.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

2.2.    Gender Discrimination

Talking about gender bias, it is often assumed that men have a knack in certain fields such as mathematics, computers, and engineering. As a result, even highly capable women rarely get the opportunity to demonstrate their skills in these fields. In the temple, it is said that monks are generally more adept than nuns in diplomacy and promoting Buddhism, which in turn limits the opportunities for nuns to fully demonstrate their potential.

There was a girl in elementary school who was good at math and had a knack for machines. But when the teacher asked her questions in class, she did not dare to speak up because she was afraid that her friends would joke and say things like “that’s something only boys are good at,” believing that boys should excel in math and mechanics, while girls are expected to be good at literature and housework. She felt pressured by societal prejudice.

In fact, we need to foster an environment that encourages women to reveal their true abilities. There should also be discussions about the differences and similarities in abilities between boys and girls, between monks and nuns. We should not fear ridicule or embarrassment when a woman excels in a field typically dominated by men. Be true to your own abilities and proud of your own success.

Prejudice often starts with thoughts or perceptions, then manifests in words, and then turns into violent acts. Children often underestimate the impact of verbal insults, thinking that “sticks and stones may break bones, but words can’t hurt you.” It is important for children to understand that verbal abuse can harm and should never be used to belittle someone.

We live in a society that has not completely eradicated racism, gender bias, culture bias, and discrimination against people with disabilities, despite the efforts of many. But we persevere in trying to minimize the biases we have absorbed over the years directly or indirectly. It is especially important to avoid public displays of discrimination. We should strive to encourage children and Buddhists to be proud of their traditions. Living among various races, each with its own value, creates a common beauty. A Vietnamese named Khôi Monologue confided that:

When I came here as a young child, I always had a breathing living desire to become more “American,” whatever that means. As I became older, I realized there really wasn’t a way to completely free my mind of a sorrowful Vietnamese past. When I had fully realized this, I not only began acting like myself, but I started to preserve and improve the Vietnamese personality that haunted me in the past. I decided to embrace it, not push it away or dissolve it with some kind of ‘Febreeze’ for personalities. Now, I have set up a reserve for my Vietnamese self like those that are set up to preserve Native Americans, and no longer do I fear to convey my true personality.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

2.3.    Blind About Religion

Some prisoners wrote letters to confide why they were not Buddhists, Christian, or Muslims. Why should they follow the family tradition? They wondered why figures like Ven. T.N. Giới Hương, Ven. Tonen Sara O’Connor, and Tojin practice Buddhism, while others follow Christianity, Islam, and so on. They reflected on how this world is so diverse and filled with differing beliefs.

I answered gently saying, “Don’t let these labels make you dizzy. Buddhism’s name is different from Christianity. These are just labels. Both religions can learn from each other but the basis of all the teachings is to perform good deeds and avoid evil. No race, religion, or ethnic group should dominate another. We should follow the path that best suits our abilities. Because we have many different qualifications and characters, religion must also be diverse to suit all abilities. We should respect other religions and learn, accept, and bring the beauty of other religions into our own. In fact, studying another religion does not weaken your faith but instead makes that religious faith more solid and meaningful. So, let us be open to learning.”

In order to help prisoners understand diverse cultures, during study hours, the prison makes an effort to explain other ethnicities and cultures, praises heroes and historical events from different contexts, encourages prisoners to exchange correspondence with friends or chaplains who provide spiritual guidance from different cultures. Discussions mention the names, food, and customs of other countries, as well as successful people in science and technology in these countries, helping prisoners develop more respect for diversity. Inmates are encouraged to promote equal treatment and compassion for their fellow prisoners.

Forgetting the contribution of other cultural groups will lead to social injustice and lack of respect for their contributions. Understanding diversity helps citizens prepare for a successful life in a multicultural society and teaching this from an early age is a way to prevent discriminatory offenses.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

2.4.                                Love, Compassion And Peace

Dear Sư cô,

Those who have jealousy in their heart don’t want to cultivate compassion because they want to become angry and suffering people. They are trapped in their confined mind—world and forget the painful feelings of others in this world.

There is no difference between people of various religions, races, and cultures. If we see differently, we rely on our egos. Until we overcome this virtual illusion we will not find peace in ourselves. But once we remove the poison from our hearts, we will realize we are part of everything and when we are good and love others, we are good and we love ourselves. There is a well—illustrated story: Once, other parts of the body complained to the stomach. They were upset that they brought food to the stomach which did nothing but crush it. So they decided not to bring food to the stomach anymore. The hands refused to put food into the mouth, the teeth refused to chew, and the throat refused to swallow.

When this action continued, the body became weak and likely to die. This forced the stomach to do something. In this way, they learned that they must work together for the common good

This is the general solution. We are human. There is a common desire to be happy, to escape misery, to breathe in the same air and to coexist peacefully. Like in the story, we often wait until it’s too late only to realize that the fleeting pleasure of material things and the ego are just illusions.

Blake

2.5.    The Dark Moment

Dear Sư cô,

My detention began with the loud noise of the prison cell door slamming shut behind me.

I’m locked up here, waiting to go to court. If convicted, I will be imprisoned for many years or for life. In this prison, except for the concrete foundation, this ten— person containing cell was a specialized block of iron made of welded iron plates, ceilings, walls, beds, and toilets—all of iron. There are no windows, only a small iron frame to pass food through. There are five small cells in a row, each containing two people and overlooking a small hallway blocked by a long iron table where we could eat and play cards. In the corner is a very dirty single bathroom. There is no space to walk outside, just three or four steps between the dining table, the bathroom, and the cell. During the day, the cell is opened. At night we are locked in.The lights are off at 10 p.m.

The cell is always full of inmates, most of them are poor American men from the slums They are detained for a variety of reasons—drugs, robbery, car theft or murder. One person is waiting to stand trial for murdering a state policeman. He is a state prisoner, but they cannot place him in a state prison cell. These conservative Whites have a habit of fighting with other Whites they don’t like from the all—White area. They will fight until they die. So, he had to be imprisoned with us in the federal prison cell to be safe. The authorities want to keep him alive to stand trial and possibly receive the death penalty. Perhaps I am also safer in the federal row of cells, although the prisoners told me that my White priority days are gone. These are their words and it is best for me to play “dumb” if I want to stay here.

My strongest experience in this prison is the noise. People are coming in and out twenty—four hours a day. Here, there is an unusual standard compared to other prisons, where prisoners are allowed to have televisions and portable radios, but only if their relatives provide them. In the cell, we have three or four large TVs that are on at full volume, twenty—four hours a day. These people seem to hate silence. One group of prisoners often wakes up early to watch cartoons, another group watches game and movie series programs all day, while the night staying group never sleeps and continues watching movies, talking, and reviewing their life stories on the street. Not only that, they argue and shout continuously, especially the rows of cells facing us.

Despite the noise, all this is just a backdrop for a turbulent waterfall inside—a waterfall of bewildered and frightened thoughts that plague me with misery day and night, especially at night after the light goes out. I lie there with nothing to read, nothing to do. My attention becomes listless, at times at peaceful at the beginning and at reflection on the prison life. One of my crimes was being a key role (the main brain of a criminal group). This carries a sentence of at least ten years with no pardon, or a maximum of life sentence. The court told my lawyer that they intended to imprison me for at least thirty years. In my mind, I kept wondering about flashbacks of the causal events that led to the consequences of sentencing and imprisonment. I earnestly sought a way out of the state of suffering that this evil karma had led me to. Or the mind is full of escape plans, unrealistic dreams, sometimes extremely violent. In my darkest moments, I remembered his son and mother and what I had brought them—why I left them so helpless in such a shame!

Jonathan

2.6.    Intimate Call

This story is yet another installment in the ongoing saga of Dharma behind bars in North America.¹³ This incident took place nearly two years ago in a federal prison and has to do with handling a potentially violent and harmful

13. Hate and discrimation in a federal prison in North America, http://

www.thubtenchodron.org/PrisonDharma/a_close_call.html

situation in a way that negated those potentialities.

I was sitting in a TV room one evening. There were three other men in the room. I don’t recall what was on television at that time. I wasn’t really there to watch the television. My “cellie” had just returned from work at the factory and I was giving him a little personal time in the cell.

Some dialogue was taking place between a couple of the men in the room, but I wasn’t really paying too much attention to them, until they mentioned the name of a person who played in the band with me. They were accusing him of stealing a book. I started listening better. John said that George (the singer in the band) had stolen a book from him. Robert said, “No nigger is going to steal anything from a White man as long as I’m in the housing unit.” Robert is a Hispanic—Anglo who hangs out with the White supremacists. John was also a racist Anglo.

I knew that George hadn’t stolen John’s book. George is a talented singer who has fairly good ethical conduct. He’s trying to get out of the gang lifestyle and he has enough money to buy what he needs. I also knew that John had accused George of taking this book before, and when George heard about it he went to John and told him he hadn’t stolen the book and said if John ever said that to anyone again, he (George) would punch him in the mouth. John’s response to George’s threat was to cower and apologize.

Now John was mouthing off about George and George’s cellie “Snake,” saying that both of them had stolen his book and that they were “no—good, thievin’ niggers.” His friend Robert was really getting worked up now. He stood up and said he was going to go confront those two “fuckin’ niggers.” It was all getting very ugly.

Hoping to stem an ugly situation in the bud, I turned to John and looked him in the eyes. I said, “George didn’t steal your book John. If I remember correctly, you already discussed this with him, and he told you that if he ever heard of his name coming out of your mouth again he would punch you in the mouth.” You could see the reality sink in on John. He slumped down in his chair and began inspecting his shoes, the floor, anything that allowed him to look down. I said, “George is a friend of mine and I know he didn’t steal your book. You shouldn’t accuse people of things like that in front of other people.”

But Robert was all worked up. He was raving about how that was all bullshit, and all niggers are thieves and scumbags and if John was too scared to do something about it, then he (Robert) would. He started for the door. John called out to him and asked him not to go out there. John said, “They’ll beat my ass if they find out I’ve been talking about them again.” He was visibly upset.

I said to Robert, “Don’t get involved in this man. You’ll only get John hurt, and maybe yourself or someone else too. It’s not worth it.” But Robert continued to mouth off. He’d talked himself into a position he felt he couldn’t back down from without looking weak in front of others. He opened the door to leave, to go to George and Snake. John called to him again and begged him not to go. I suggested once more that Robert not go. But it did no good. Robert was out the door in a flash.

I told John he should have kept his mouth shut. He didn’t have any proof that George and Snake stole his book. He’d already been in a confrontation with them once over

it already and he’d apologized and backed down because he knew they’d beat his butt. Now here he was running his mouth in the TV room again, involving someone else in his hate gossip and accusations, and now someone was going to get hurt. John sat there looking miserable. The fourth person in the room was just sitting there shaking his head in disgust.

I decided to go find Robert and the people he was confronting, so I might say something to disarm the situation. I found Snake and Robert on the upper tier, talking angrily about what John had said. I stepped up to them and said, “Hey you guys, leave this alone. This is nothing to get hurt over. Don’t go to the hole over what some dummy says in a TV room. Just leave it alone.” Then I went to my cell to get a cup of tea.

Then I went back to the TV room to see if things were resolved peacefully. John, Robert, and the other guy were still the only ones in the room. I sat down and asked if everything was okay. Robert and John remained silent. So I turned around for a moment to think the situation over.

Instantly, the door opened, and I turned to see George and Snake come in. Two other Black guys were standing outside the door. George and Snake walked into the room. George went over to John and said, “You talkin’ ’bout me again?” John remained silent. George said, “I thought we talked about this.” John remained silent. George said, “I didn’t steal anything from you. Is this about that book again?” John looked over at Robert.

Robert got up from his chair and kicked off his shower shoes (a sign that he’s ready to fight). George turned to face him.

Robert said, “Leave him alone.”

“This is none of your business,” replied George.

“I’m making it my business.”

“Why don’t you stay out of it? This is between me and him” (indicating John).

“It’s between us now,” Robert growled. “So what do you want to do about it?” “Whatever you want to do about it.”

I couldn’t believe things had escalated to this degree. At this point I stood up and approaching Robert and George, said, “Are you guys really going to do something?” They both turned to me. I continued, “If you really want to fight, why don’t you go someplace?” I was trying to break their train of thought. “Are you going to do this here?” I said. I could see their minds working, but they didn’t reply. Finally, I said, “Well, none of this has anything to do with me. So if nobody minds, I’m going to leave. I don’t need to be caught up in any of this bullshit.” Both of them indicated that they had no problem with me leaving, so I stepped between them and went to the door.

I looked over at the fourth person who was watching TV and said, “Do you want to leave too?” He indicated that he did. He stood up and walked towards me. As we stepped out of the door I said to him, “Come on, let’s get out of here. What a waste!” He and I left the area.

I headed for my cell and had just walked into it and said to my cellie, “You won’t believe what’s going on with Robert and...”

There was a knock on the door. It was George, Snake, and their two friends. I motioned for them to come in. George stepped in, left the door open so his friends could hear us, and he asked me, “Did you bring up the subject of me stealing John’s book? Or did he bring it up?” I told him the truth, that John had brought it up. George said that John and Robert told him I had brought it up. Of course this wasn’t true. I said, “You all know me. You know how I carry myself. Do you think I would do that?” George answered, “I told them you wouldn’t.” I went on to tell George and the others that my only part in the conversation was to tell John he should shut up about it, that he’d already been warned, and that Robert should stay out of it because it was none of his business and I didn’t want to see anyone get hurt over some dumb shit. By the time I finished, George had already headed out of the cell. Everyone there knew I wouldn’t lie to them. It’s important to be a man of your word. People know they can trust what you say. It can resolve things in good ways. It’s helped me and others in many potentially violent situations in prison.

My cellie and I had a brief discussion about what just happened. We came to the conclusion that for George and his guys to walk to my cell that quickly, Robert and John must have panicked when I left the room and immediately began talking their way out of an ugly ordeal. The conversation after I left the room could not have lasted more than two or three minutes. In that time period they must have tried to throw the whole thing off onto me so they could get out of the room in one piece. After all their loud talk and accusations, when actually confronted with the fruits of their actions, they tried to throw culpability off onto me. It didn’t work. The thing that prevented it was that people knew I wouldn’t lie to them.

I walked down to the TV room to speak with Robert and John. I wanted to ask them why they tried to throw everything onto me when they both knew I had nothing to do with it. But when I began to talk with them, Robert immediately told me they didn’t want to hear anything I had to say. “You’re a disgrace to your race,” he said. “Don’t ever talk to me again.”

I left the room. There was not going to be any productive dialogue at that time.

The next day during lunch break, I was in my cell alone. Suddenly the door opened and a soldier for the Aryan Brotherhood walked into my cell. He closed the door behind him and stood with his left hand in his pants, obviously holding a knife (this was later confirmed). He was staring at me as though I’d killed his brother. I asked him what was up.

He told me that his “brother” Robert had told him what happened the night before. I asked him what that was exactly. “A bunch of niggers rode up on Robert in the TV room. You broke and ran on him like a coward.” I asked him if he believed that. He said Robert was his “dog.” He had to believe him.

I told him that if something had really happened, and if I had been stupid enough to get involved, then I would have helped George because he was my friend and Robert was in the wrong. So Robert should be glad that I left when I did. I would have been one more person for him to fight.

Of course I was being facetious. I wouldn’t have hit anyone under any circumstances. His response to this was, “You’re a disgrace to your race!” He was red in the face and fondling his weapon.

“What race do you think I belong to?” I asked him. “The White race.”

“You’re wrong. I belong to the Buddha’s race, a race without stain. We are all colors. I am a child of the Buddhas. I don’t hate people because of their skin color.”

I could see in his eyes that, behind the anger, he was surprised at what I said. I continued, “You know I practice Buddhism. Everyone here sees me around the compound. I don’t switch up. I practice nonviolence, and you know I have friends of every color. George plays in one of my bands and he’s not a thief. He didn’t steal John’s book, and he’d already told John that if he heard his name come out of John’s mouth again, that he would do something to him. Robert had no business getting involved. It was none of his business. All I did was try to prevent someone getting hurt, and nobody did get hurt.”

The Aryan told me he’d heard it differently.

“I’m sure you did, because Robert and John were scared to death. They’d even tried to throw the whole thing off onto me.” He was calming down now. I could see it. I continued, “Look, if you want to stab me, then go ahead. I won’t try to stop you. I’ll stand here and let you stab me if you think it’s the right thing to do. I didn’t run out on Robert. He was wrong for getting involved, and I wasn’t involved so I left. It had nothing to do with race. Now you’re getting involved in somebody else’s mess. I made a vow never to harm anyone or anything ever again, so if you really think you’ll accomplish something by stabbing me or killing me, then go ahead and get it over with. I won’t hurt you. I’ll pray that whatever negative karma your actions generate will manifest on me, so that you won’t suffer from what you do.”

He looked like a kid caught doing something wrong in grade school. His confidence in the validity of his action was broken. He doubted his brother and the version of the story he’d been given. We talked for a little while more, and I told him all about what really happened. Then I went on to tell him about the Buddhist path. He shook my hand before he left.

This guy is still a soldier in the Aryan Brotherhood. He has killed at least a dozen men for them. He was well known at USP Leavenworth, Kansas, for hitting a lot of people there. He had a reputation for going into a job without asking questions and hitting the target without a moment’s thought or discussion. I changed his entire record. Now he’s twelve to one. Now he’s finally found that place in his mind where he can pause to consider what he’s about to do. He also knows there’s a nonviolent solution.

By the time I left that institution, he and I had many more discussions, and he’d developed a genuine doubt about the organization he belonged to. He said on several occasions that he was going to write to national headquarters of the

A.B. and ask them about things I’d brought up regarding their philosophy. The night I left to be transferred here, he was at my going—away party, shaking my hand, hugging me, and complimenting me on being consistent and devoted to my path.

As a last note to this story I would like to mention that at no time during our confrontation was I ever afraid of dying. It was definite possibility that I would die. He was the guy to do it, and he’d come there to my cell for that purpose. But the possibility didn’t frighten me, which would not have been the case in the past. Previously, I would have been worried. I would have shaken and talked quickly, saying anything to prevent my death. But back then I didn’t have complete faith and confidence in the Triple Gem. I didn’t have unshakable faith in the Buddha potentiality existing within the continuum of my own consciousness. Before, I wasn’t prepared to die. I didn’t understand death or how we could create the causes and conditions that could lead to this type of situation. Not understanding this, I would have reacted differently. I may even have provoked him into killing me when otherwise he may not have.

Now I understand that whatever happens to us is the direct result of actions we have done in the past. If I’d been stabbed to death in that cell, it wouldn’t have been unwarranted. It would have been the fruition of some seed I had sowed sometime in the past, perhaps many lifetimes ago. By understanding karma, I was able to remain in a place where I was accepting of any resolution and motivated to prevent him from creating the causes and conditions for his own future suffering. I think it was this motivation and mindset that made things work out for both of us. Sometimes we get so scared that we hurt ourselves or others. Remaining calm, open to whatever happens, and carrying our intent to prevent harm to others with us into every new moment, we are able to help ourselves and others. We distance ourselves from the self—centered, knee—jerk reaction that so often hurts us.

M.P.

2.7.    Racial Color Blindness

December 4, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

Next month will be exactly twelve years since I was imprisoned. The time has passed as fast as a breeze blowing through a window. I spent the first couple years trying to figure things out, not really thinking about what the rest of my life in prison would look like.

After about two and a half years, I was transferred to a private prison in Tennessee. This was a situation where a bunch of inmates from Wisconsin were transferred to this private prison because of overcrowding issues in Wisconsin. Once transferred to this private prison the attitudes of the prisoners changed. There was much more overt racism, fighting, and contention over resources. There seemed to be a disconnect between the state authorities and the employees of the private prison.

It was more of a dangerous environment than the previous prison I was in while in Wisconsin. It seemed inmates became emboldened merely by being transferred hundreds of miles away from home.

It was an unforgettable experience, one in which I too made bad decisions. I associated myself with a group of people that didn’t have my best interests in mind and attempted to escape while there. The people I associated with were motivated by hate and plainly put, racists. After being caught I was placed in administrative segregation for almost two and a half years. What a volatile environment. At the time, I just managed to find my way through it, but looking back I don’t know why I wasn’t more scared.

I never really bought into the racist philosophy, but when you’re in that kind of the environment you tend to find a group that accepts you.

After my time in segregation I returned to Wisconsin with a new outlook. Having been alone with my thoughts for so long I was able to learn to think clearly and to start thinking for myself.

Tojin

                                           ***

Namo Amitabha Buddha.

Desembre 12, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

Thank you for your letter and the beautiful photos of the outside of the Green Bay Prison. I did not expect the surrounding area and outside grounds to be so beautiful. When I first came here, I was so worried about what it was going be like inside that I completely failed to pay attention to the outside.

I will write as much as I can for your book, A Buddhist Nun and American Inmates. I was fortunate to meet you and Ven. Tonen as my spiritual masters. Last Monday we had a two—hour meditation session. We were a group of about fourteen people, most of them new inmates. It is wonderful that there are so many people that want to learn to meditate and listen to the Dharma. I think it is best that you come to guide as a pastor (a personal consultation). I believe Ven. Tonen will tell you about the rules here as well as what can be brought into the prison such as papers and books.

Some more background regarding my crime. I committed this crime with what I thought was a friend. His name is Lucian. The victim, Ted, was Lucian’s foster father. The victim’s wife was Mary, Lucian’s foster mother. Lucian and his foster mother Mary were having an affair, and they wanted Ted killed to both have him out of the way so they could be together and collect his life insurance. I became involved because I was threatened by Lucian. I was young, scared, naive and just didn’t have the courage to stop this from happening. I really felt that Lucian would harm my family if I didn’t help him. In the end though, Ted is dead because of my actions. It was cold—blooded and unjust. When I talk about this it’s hard to believe I could’ve been so foolish, so far off from what is morally right, and so blind to the value of human life.

I am often visited by relatives every month or two. One group is my mother and stepfather, another group is my older sister, brother—in—law, their two sons and my father. The visits last two hours, depending on whether the visiting room is crowded or not. My family helps me with everything I need. They can give me money but aren’t allowed to give me food.

I have some good friends in here, they are hard to come by. It’s difficult to make good friends in prison because it’s hard to trust each other. I try to surround myself with knowledgeable people. I live in a cell by myself. I’ve been in a single cell for seven years. I’ve had roommates in the past. I try to live in harmony with people and also make conscious decisions about who to stay away from.

You can send money if you want for the postage, but

when you do the envelope can only contain a check or money order, nothing else, no letter or pictures. I thank you for your care.

I just started writing the daily diary. I have some short entries that I will type and send to you. Usually what I write about is my thoughts in the moment. Hopefully, my words will benefit everyone.

Namo Sakyamuni Buddha.

Tojin

                                                  ***

From: Venerable T.N. Giới Hương This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

December 16, 2007

Dear Tojin,

I have just sent a short article with links to several familiar Vietnamese websites. The article is titled, “Please Cherish the Moment We Are Living.”

The newspaper report said that on December 12, 2007, I performed a Taking Refuge Ceremony for a female patient lying in a hospital bed. I gave her the Dharma name, Viên Bào My. Vien Bào My is an intelligent student of sociology. She just turned twenty. She is facing death in the coming days due to end—stage cancer. The doctor refused to treat her. She was too weak and filled with pain to stand up. Her skin and eyes have turned yellow. We went to her house to pray for her every day. My asked me and everyone to pray for her to be alive on Christmas or until January 5, 2008, because it is her birthday. After that she will be happy to go to another world. This is really bittersweet, is it not?

Yesterday I brought her a box of chocolates, a Christmas card, and a birthday card with the words, “A very innocent heart, a very peaceful soul. Wishing Viên Bào My a Happy Christmas Day (December 25, 2007) and a great birthday (January 5, 2008). Always playful and gentle. I hope your wishes and dreams come true. I hope that Viên Bào My finds happiness with the present. Enjoy Christmas and birthday atmosphere right now, do not wait until December 25 or January 5. Do not waste time and energy dwelling in the future. Remember to smile at everyone around you. The present moment we are living and breathing in is precious. Do not think that it will be fun to wait until you are healed, until you graduate, when you return to the temple, when there is no traffic jam or when you have a party. Be optimistic and stay with every breath; you will find the present life is wonderful.

That is a summary of Viên Bào My’s story.

Sư cô T.N. Giới Hương

                                                 ***

December 20, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

Since realizing the truth of the Dharma, I’ve begun to think back on the past and try to figure out several things, how I got here, why I’ve thought the way I did, why I held certain views about race, anger, and other emotions.

I’ve thought about my upbringing and childhood. There is a saying that it “takes a village to raise a child.” I’ve realized that we are all the sum of our life experiences, the product of our interactions with our family and with society. At first it seemed easy to blame my family, upbringing or society for the way I am, for the result of my life, after all, society seems to impose discrimination on all aspects of our lives.

Of course, when I began to understand the Dharma, the interdependent nature of things, and the teaching of non—duality, I started to take responsibility for my actions and life. Now I’m trying to be a good Buddhist, I don’t know if my efforts will bring about enlightenment or anything else I desire, but after the harm I’ve caused, my only aim is to honor my ancestors, the patriarchs, and saints. Another thing I’ve realized is that I shouldn’t be in a hurry to “attain anything.” I have also learned a lesson from the Lotus Sutra that I must learn to make “effort but without effort”.

Tojin

In the May 2007 edition of the Sōsaku newsletter, Douglas Stream (Tojin) wrote an article entitled, “Color Blind.” It was premised off the question, “What can White people do to become allies to people of color?” Tojin went on to use the Webster’s dictionary definition of allies as follows: 1. Those united in an alliance, 2. Persons, nations, bound to one another as by treaty.

Tojin went on to say, “I would submit that we are already in an alliance called the human race and that the act of being allies is in and of itself something that requires reciprocation. To fully respond to this question we must first ask the question, What causes White people and people of color to be adversaries in the first place?” Known in Buddhism as the three poisons, greed, hatred, and ignorance (sometimes called desire, anger and delusion) are, I believe, major factors in what causes us to be adversaries. These poisons transcend skin color. They manifest themselves in thoughts, words, and actions. We all know how quickly these can turn into something that divides us. We should be equally aware that these manifestations (thoughts, words, and actions) can be cultivated to bring people together, to counteract these poisons, to fight hatred and racism.

A preamble to this alliance requires first that we look at each other as human beings and not only seek understanding but accept the fact that as human beings we are capable of understanding each other. We are all capable of hating and being hated, of discrimination and of being discriminated against. Much is written in Buddhism about “letting go” and not holding on to our past, to be aware of the present moment.

I think it’s naïve to expect others to forget or let go of their past and it’s not fair to ask them. We must realize that as human individuals, irrespective of skin color, we are the sum of our life experiences. We are responsible for our past, but more importantly, we are responsible for what we do in the present. It’s our collective response to the present that will decide if the future contains the mistakes of the past.

So what can we do? I think people of every color need to realize the world we live in. The easy answer to the question of what White people can do to be allies to people of color is treat them like White people! And the same would be true if the question were, “What can people of color do to be allies to White people” is treat them like people of color! See yourself in others, then whom can you hurt? What harm can you do?

Responding to our current environment is the place to start. Attention White people: if you are in a situation with fellow White people and you hear them using racial slurs or other ignorant, hateful speech about people of color then speak out against it! Attention people of color: if you are in a situation with fellow people of color and you hear them using racial slurs or other ignorant, hateful speech about White people, then speak out against it! For how can one contribute to the solution when they are part of the problem? (Ignoring the problem makes you a part of it.) It’s going to take courage and the willingness to act— on the part of everyone—for us all to become truly color blind.

2.8.    Gang Discrimination

December 24, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

Today I wanted to write about gangs, and the way they discriminate against each other. There are many different gangs on the street and in prison. A high percentage of prisoners are, or were, once affiliated with one gang or another. As I mentioned before, most crimes committed are due to fear, ignorance, anger, and stupidity. This holds true for crimes committed by gangs as well. Drug dealing is probably at the root of most of the crimes, because things like robbery, violence and in the worst—case, murder, are all crimes that stem from life in the drug trade.

One of the saddest realities is that even after some gang members are arrested and brought to prison they continue to associate with their gang and continue hostility toward their rival gangs.

Unfortunately, even in prison there is an illegal drug trade and it’s the gangs that are usually involved with it. So I guess the question is why does this happen and what fosters it? I think there are several reasons. Personally, I think there is a lack of self—esteem among a lot of prisoners. They desire fame or approval whether it’s from society on the street or society inside the prison.

They also seek protection from other gangs. To someone who has been in prison this may seem like an elementary explanation, but it’s also true. I think the biggest reason a great number of people join gangs and live a criminal lifestyle is both because it’s the only way they know. It’s how they’ve been brought up, and they are ignorant to their untapped potential and unaware that there are other options.

There are a lot of politics surrounding gang life in prison, as it relates to different gangs and races. They are sometimes intertwined because some gangs are based on race, which makes the problem worse. There are unwritten rules that some gang members have to follow and loyalty is probably at the top of the list. If a gang member violates any of their gang’s rules there are consequences, sometimes very violent consequences.

In my view one of the saddest things is the wasted lives in this gang culture. So many come to prison and are given a chance to turn their lives around, yet turn their back on this opportunity, are released and continue the cycle. I have witnessed on numerous occasions gang members that come to prison, have no support during their stay in prison from their fellow gang members, yet they return to society and continue to associate themselves with the gang.

I can’t say enough about racial discrimination in prison. Not only is it directed by staff towards inmates, but inmates demonstrate it towards each other. One of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned in Buddhism is the Noble Eightfold Path and the part about Right Speech. Words have consequences. The biggest and most obvious example is in the hateful derogatory words we call each other. Words like “nigger, honky, White boy”—the list could go on forever. The point is that words matter. I realize and accept that I don’t get to decide what someone else gets offended by or what words upset them. I am also not going to allow someone else to decide how I feel and what words upset me.

It’s disappointing sometimes to explain my point of view to others in here, because so many want to hold onto their differences and use those differences to continue the cycle of discrimination and hostility toward each other.

I’ve tried to explain to others that conflicts start with words, discrimination starts with words. Sometimes I’m successful, although more often than not, my pleas for understanding fall on deaf ears in this environment.

I’ve tried to imbue or be a revolutionary on this subject—— that the way things have been here in prison as it relates to race doesn’t have to be this way. Unfortunately, the reality of this environment is stronger than my will. I guess I’ve just learned that I no longer enjoy the privileges or power of the White class still prevailing in the free world. In some respects I feel lucky to have experienced dual realities and seen the truth as it really plays out. I think that my fears aren’t unlike anyone else’s. I don’t want to be a victim, lose my dignity or life in the face of violent discrimination. Through the understanding I’ve gained in studying and practicing Buddhism I’ve learned what I will accept in my life, how to pick my battles and where I draw the lines.

Tojin

                                             ***

January 20, 2008,

Dear Sư cô,

We now have another chapel bigger than the room where you came to guide us last time. The seat arrangement is also different. We sat in four rows instead of facing the wall and we sat across from each other. I hope that you will come to perform the purificational ritual for this new chapel.

Dear Sư cô, today I want to tell you more about my childhood. You know, I started drinking at an early age, eleven—twelve years old. My family all drinks alcohol. I think that’s also why I followed in their heels without hesitation. By the time I was sixteen years old, in a week I drank three or four times, more than others. From school or work, I went home and drank and continued this as if nothing had happened. Only later did I realize its temptation. I think the good thing in the prison environment is that it gives me time to sit by myself to reflect what I’ve done in the past—videos of life have appeared before my eyes.

January 20, 2008 (continued)

I recollect to see the wrong deviations that I can correct. This is what changed my life. The Buddha nature is a factor that transformed my life, not only meditating but the quietness of the prison helped my life there. I don’t know if I told you about this before. While I was in Tennessee State I escaped once because I wanted to prove that I am outstanding, being that great hero who can escape from prison after being captured. Because of this crime, I was locked up in an isolation room (solitary confinement) for three long years. This incident gave me time to think more thoroughly about what I did.

But thanks to that, I had a lot of calm time before I studied and followed Buddhism. Because studying Buddhism helped me realize my vision to be opened from the inside to outside and thanks to that, my personality was also changed. I realized that I am creating a nuisance for myself and this did not seem from the outside, but inside. I understood the fact that all my actions had consequences, affected others, but it was not really until I came back to experiencing it that I saw things clearly. To some extent, I do not know much about myself. Every time I make a decision such as what to eat, who to talk to, or what to say, it has a big or some influence in the group of fellow prisoners around me. It is also very difficult to communicate or share comments with other prisoners here, as once something is said to one person, all nearby individuals can overhear it.

The place I lived in had four levels of doors that looked more like a gates than doors, so I could hear and know what they are all talking about. That’s also why trouble

arises if any idiot ever uses offensive words.

Mostly, the words involve racial discrimination. Because of this, it makes me tired with the group. Sometimes I want to explain that they are too stupid to come up with gossip to quarrel about, but if I talk to them, they hate me, claim that I liked and supported the other group. The prisoners who have violent tendencies always want violence in their heads, especially in prison. Personally, if I am wrong, I want them to tell me where I am wrong. I will thank them more, but nobody really wants to be wrong themselves.

Tojin

                        ***

January 20, 2008 (continued)

I heard there is a proverb, “If you want to live, you must fight.” I could start a war in five minutes by saying something about skin color that would immediately cause a problem.

It is very difficult to maintain courtesy and harmony with these prisoners. If an inmate in this prison appears to have a good attitude or is peaceful, it’s often a disguise to deceive gullible people like me. In reality, they prefer to cause trouble and provoke others.

Tojin

                                     ***

January 28, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

Hate and criticism are a common cause of stress here. We have a spacious dining room seating about 150 people. Everyone sits where they want. White prisoners join the White group, Black prisoners join the Black group, and there is space for Mexican, Latin American, and Asian prisoners too.

It is the same thing that happens when choosing a room. There are 296 rooms in the row where I live, with 125 rooms housing two people. This is also the reason for messy stories. Blacks want to be with Blacks and Whites want to stay with Whites, so it causes fights with each other. No one will yield to anyone. I can live with anyone. The staff and guards in this camp are mostly White while most of the inmates here are Black. As far as I can see, the Black prisoners blame the guards for being racist. These troublesome things were also done by the guards because they hated Blacks. In Tennessee State Prison, the exact opposite. Most of the guards there are Black so they keep clashing with White American prisoners.

Every day, there are clashes between Black and White Americans. I know that competition is a natural trait, but especially in prison, it is the more aggressive people who end up fighting and cursing each other. With nothing else to do, they find reasons to quarrel with each other. That is a problem. I could write about this story forever. They all have one thing in common: ignorance and competition.

                            ***

Dear Sư cô,

Let me tell you about the conversation between me and another prisoner. The expression is a bit rude, but the story is valuable. This prisoner was impatient and suspicious. If there are even only a few bad words, there will be fighting. Those are immutable principles.

Before I tell you, I want to explain so you understand. In prison, there is one thing these prisoners should have seen and spoken about and that is a search warrant. When ordered, the guards have the right to strip the naked prisoners in order to grope and check all places to search and do so, but they remained cool. Sorry Sư cô for the way I described this image.

I will explain this in a little bit to settle the argument. The other day I was standing between two prisoners who were arguing. One prisoner scolds other prisoner and says, “You are bitch dogs” and then vice—versa. If only two prisoners could argue back then it could be easy to settle. But here, another group stood around and talked and lit the fire with oil to make the argument bigger. I thought about it for a while, and I acted impulsively which led to a fight before I could explain the situation to the guard searching them. I couldn’t understand why he seemed not a bit shy about being stripped naked as his whole body was searched.

Although there were only a few words exchanged, they seemed to want to get along. My question made them pause and think, which helped calm the quarrel for a moment, but next time their argument continued.

On August 7, 2008 Dear Sư cô,

I have witnessed these acts of discrimination and seen the hateful treatment of people for all kinds of reasons. I think the definition of “hate criminal” (driven by dislike) is the natural opposite of “love criminals” (driven by love).

I have never witnessed a crime driven by love, but I believe it must happen. Crimes can arise from love when unrequited love turns into hate. In fact, from my personal experience and observation, many people are guilty of harboring feelings of hatred, which lead to sinful actions. I believe the source of hatred comes from the disagreements and discord that causes one person to judge another’s intentions, ultimately resulting in a crime.

For example, there are many classes of people, groups of people, religions, genders, and races in this prison. I just believe that it is difficult to judge their intentions. Sometimes you can see it clearly, but most of it is hard to know. One of the top issues here is homosexuality. There are many openly homosexual people. Not only do they like homosexuality, but they also thrive in this brutal environment.

There are fights and oppression here stemming from division and discrimination. The consequences are terrible, and they often begin with something as small as signs of disrespect, discrimination, defiance, or not following the gang members’ rules aligning with their own desires. So, who can say that these homosexuals are oppressed because of these reasons or if they are oppressed simply because they are gay? It is difficult to judge.

I am a White man and this makes me a minority here. I often hear this group blame that group, instead of being responsible for their actions. I firmly believe that some grudges leading to sin are very evident and I agreed to set up reconciliation to give prisoners the opportunity to reflect. In my experience, merely punishing without

teaching or explaining only leads to more serious sins.

Tojin

                       ***

August 15, 2008 Dear Tojin,

Let us recognize that the United States is a special country. We live in a unique period of American history and society. Prisoners in camps like Tojin say most people come from many different races and cultures. Many people from faraway lands come to this country seeking diversity, acceptance, love, and the chance to live together. However, in a sudden moment of ignorance, they unintentionally commit a crime and end up in a situation where they have time to reflect on their past sins.

I think that the United States has offered many opportunities. America is like a big, generous embrace of a mother who loves all her “adopted” children as her own, loves all beings like real children whether their skin is yellow, black, white or red. This love should not be just spoken, but demonstrated before it is expressed. That is why the United States became a united nation.

I hope all of us, especially those from other countries, come to settle here with deep gratitude. Let us avoid discrimination, accept our differences, and love and live together as children in a family. Please nurture love without prejudice so that our community remains vibrant, like a garden with various flowers.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

 Venerable T.N. Giới Hương at the gate of the Greenfield

Correctional Facility, Wisconsin

Chapter 3

THE HARM OF CRIMINALS

3.1.    Contributing Factors

Male teenagers and men more are more likely to commit crimes than women and the elderly, so the number of male prisons is always more than female prisons.

For twelve prisons in Wisconsin, where we often conduct guided meditation, eleven are for males and only one is for women (Taycheedah Correctional Institution for Women, Maximum/Medium Security, Fond du Lac, Wisconsin).

Women and the elderly are more afraid of committing crimes than men and teenagers. Adolescents are less likely to commit crimes than adults, so their crime rate is also less. Due to their fragile bodies, women are often the victims of violence, assault, or rape.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

3.2.    The Consequences

Crime is a problem in every society. The consequences greatly affect each person in every social class. The price for offenders can range from short—term imprisonment to life sentences. For victims, the costs include medical expenses, property damage, and lost income.

The losses experienced by both victims and non— victims can include costs such as investing in safety equipment, stronger locks, more lights, safer parking, alarms, and watchdogs. These expenses are necessary to avoid becoming a victim. Other expenses include moving to a more secure area, funeral expenses, necessary taxes, and the loss of time from work or school, due to fear of crime.

The harm is hard to imagine and the worst is the mental and physical pain, which lowers the quality of life, causing grief and trauma to friends and family. Moreover, crime brings painful effects on friends and contributes to the breakdown of families. Crime permanently changes and deforms a victim’s personality, creating a lot of hesitation when going somewhere, or being scared of even getting to know someone.

Many people are surprised to find that the feeling of anxiety and fear lasts long after they have been a victim. This instability can make them feel confused and unstable. People around you like your friends, relatives, and children are also affected by this mindset.

The intensity of your reaction depends on the type of crime. It is influenced by factors such as whether you know the perpetrator, the support of family, friends, and the police, as well as any past incidents caused by the offender.

This consequence will last for some time and even if you don’t take it seriously, you may still feel anxiety. For example, if a thief sneaks into your home, it can affect your life deeply, even if the thief doesn’t injure your body.

One of the scary things is how the mind can affect the offender’s heart. Unlike an illness, this is a behavior driven not by intention, but rather a tendency. Criminals commit acts with clear intent to cause harm. If you are a victim, you will feel weak and helpless. If the crime continues, it can cause violence within your family, or subject you to harassment, such as racism. This will cause a life— threatening crisis.

Crime is a major issue that the masses care about. While some victims do not experience long—term harm, others suffer from persistent anxiety, nervous disorders, and even neurological disorders. If you find yourself in such a situation, you must seek help from your doctor, psychologist, or religious leaders for early treatment.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

3.3.    Increased Crime

Although US policy tries to help with jobs for residents, supporting the poor, elderly, the sick, widowed, and unemployed with financial aid and food stamps, bad things still happen. Greed, anger, and ignorance (deeply ingrained in our hearts) continue to fuel crime. The United States has more prisoners more than any other country.

In 1970, there were more than 300,000 prisoners in the US. Today, after thirty—eight years (as of 2008), the number of inmates in California alone is nearly the same. According to a study by the International Center for Prison Studies at King’s College, London, there are currently more than 2.3 million prisoners in US prison camps.¹⁴ Each year the state spends a significant amount of US dollars on the construction of new prison camps because the number of prisoners is growing rapidly. America may not prosper and future generations will not be happy if the United States becomes a territory filled with prisons.

In Wisconsin alone, Venerable Tonen and Ms. Meg Smith said there are twenty prisons (not including federal and local prisons within the area) and about 23,000 inmates in 2007.

Bo Lozoff is the author of We Are All Doing Time and the founder of the Prison—Ashram Project. He described changes from the time he started working in prison in the 1970s: “During the twenty—five years I worked for the prison, the national budget for building and operating the prison increased from $500 million to $31 billion a year. The number of prisons has quadrupled ... One in fifty children in the US has a parent in prison. More young Blacks are in prison than college. The list of detainees who joined the Buddhist studies of the Ashram Association has grown from a few dozen to 30,000.”

A cartoon depicts a number of inmates in front of the prison gate, carrying bags on their shoulders, causing traffic congestion. A driver asks, “What happened?” A

 There are currently more than 2.3 million prisoners in US prisons, http://www.prisonactivist.org/articles/beyond—attica—untold—sto- ry—womens—resistance—behind—bars.

prisoner in line replies, “We’re waiting for the order to enter the prison.” While exaggerated for comedic or effect, it warns of the grim reality of the prison system.

Is this a result of economic hardship, leading many people to break the law? Do the courts just send them to the detention centers and forget about them, throwing the key away? Do judges and conservative prosecutors contribute to this issue? Are many of the inmates lining up to re—offend and re—enter prison? The answer is a resounding yes!

The number of crimes increased rapidly nationwide. Not only first—time offenders but also repeat offenders. According to the US Department of Criminal Justice, the rate of recidivism increased by 5 percent compared to the last decade. In general, seven out of ten released prisoners will return to prison.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

3.4.    Solitary Confinement

Dear Sư cô,

There was a prisoner in the meditation study group with you. He came to listen to your instructions and practice meditation having been placed in protective custody (PC), which means solitary confinement. The reason he was in PC was that even though he was in prison, he continued to be aggressive and cause harm.

“Aggression” here means actions such as tipping someone off, killing someone to silence them, or committing rape. It involves a crime with a cold—blooded or callous mindset.

Or if he did something to violate the gang rules, it was enough to cause a death threat from the gang. As a result, he had to be placed in protective custody, locked up and watched carefully to avoid possible violent revenge. Usually the maximum—security prisons such as Greenbay are reserved for those convicted of serious crimes, including brutal assassinations. These places are very violent with killings, fights, stabbings, assaults—all kinds of bad things can happen.

Tojin

3.5.    Rape

Every year, more than 200,000 rape incidents occur in prisons and are still on the rise. Most of the victims are young, gentle, nonviolent prisoners or teenagers who have just committed their first offense. They suffer beyond imagination. This is a sad and unfortunate thing, but it is real life in prisons throughout the United States. Just looking superficially on the internet with the words “prison rape” will reveal a huge amount of information. Google website alone has countless references.

Sexual assault can lead to hepatitis, AIDS, and other infections. In 2000, the level of AIDS in the prison system was known to be four times higher than the national average.

Michael at the Langlade County Jail Detention Center in Wisconsin told me (Venerable Giới Hương) why he had my address. When another prisoner, John, was released, he left a book with my address. So Michael wrote a letter to ask about learning Buddhism from me. Michael said that John was gay. He was handsome and gentle and became a victim of violence including rape, beatings, extortion, and bullying.

After learning about John’s situation, Michael and many close friends protected John. Michael did not take money or ask John to have sex with anyone, though many prisoners asked Michael about matchmaking.

Michael asked me if John had visited me yet because he said he would come see me for taking refuge at Phước hậu Temple. After reading the Buddhist books that John left behind, Michael also naturally developed a Buddhist mind, wanted to breathe a new breeze, become a better person, and did not want to live a messy life anymore. Michael asked me to convey Michael’s good intent and warm regards to John.

This story shows us “the disasters do not come alone.” When an offender goes to jail and then to prison, he continues to suffer from the harmful effects of evils in prison that the prison system has not managed all. It is a situation where inmates become victims of beatings, arrests, extortion, rape, and bullying that can occur openly or silently. The world is truly painful and disturbing. Please stay away from the cause of suffering (the truth of the cause of suffering)¹⁵ that leads to these hardships. Please awaken yourself and master your desires, anger, and selfishness in order to build a more immense noble and pure love.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

15. The Four Noble Truths contain the essence of the Buddha’s teach- It was these four principles that the Buddha came to understand

3.6.    Influences From Childhood

Totsesu told me that when he was a teenager, he used to get drunk and use violence to bully people he thought were weaker. But Totsesu is now awakened and a devoted Buddhist.

Totsesu did not believe that alcohol and drugs were the reason he ended up in jail because he lacked the money to buy them. As a teenager, Totsesu considered himself to be useless and unkind. When a child believes himself to be useless or not good, he tends to behave poorly. As Totsesu grew older, opium and alcohol were used as tools, along with evil behavior, to cope with the sins he had accumulated as a child.

While in jail, most prisoners do not engage in crimes because they do not have an opportunity to do so. The majority of prisoners do not use alcohol or drugs anymore. They are aware of the harm and destruction they have caused, and this has transformed them into different people.

 during his meditation under the Bodhi tree.

1. The truth of suffering (dukkha)
2. The truth of the origin of suffering (samudaya)
3. The truth of the cessation of suffering (nirodha)
4. The truth of the path to the cessation of suffering (magga)

The Buddha is often compared to a physician. In the first two Noble Truths he diagnosed the problem (suffering) and identified its cause. The third Noble Truth is the realization that there is a cure.

The fourth Noble Truth, in which the Buddha set out the Eightfold Path, is the prescription, the way to achieve a release from suffering. If the burden of repentant thoughts about past behavior continues to invade the mind every day, those thoughts will prevent one from progressing on the Buddhist path. Totsesu had to break free from guilt to lead a productive life. Sin is a form of blame, a mistake born from delusion, but our Buddha nature is good.

If Totsesu only focuses on feeling guilty, then Totsesu will not solve the problem at all. He should practice promoting the energy of compassion to uproot fear, anger, and begin gradually appreciating his positive qualities. Totsesu should embrace his capacity for compassion for himself and others. May he do better for himself and for the people around him. By doing this, he will become more mature, stronger, and more responsible to those around him.

In the Dhammapada,¹⁶ the Buddha taught that “Whoever has done harmful actions but later covers them up with good is like the moon which, freed from clouds, lights up the world.”

Regret has both positive and negative aspects. Recognizing guilt is good but if it leads to constant torment over past sins without motivating positive change, it is useless. However, acknowledging fault, making a determination not to repeat sins and turning the mind to doing good—that is the positive side.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

16. Dhammapada, Verse 72. Ven. Thích Minh Châu translated into En- Vietnamese Buddhist Research Institute. 1994. Việt Nam. http:// www.buddhismtoday.com/viet/kinh/pali/phapcu1.htm

3.7.    Violence Or Nonviolence

Dear Sư cô,

Nearly 70 percent of prisoners in the United States are jailed for nonviolent cases. We are sometimes so poisoned that we think that prisoners are like bloodthirsty devils trying to escape and harm us. The fact is that most of the prisoners are troubled, confused, and unfortunate people, eager to improve their lives if given the chance. Prisoners may not be violent while incarcerated, but when they are freed, may become violent. Prisons do not necessarily deter inmates from committing crimes, but can sometimes make them unable to adapt to the outside society.

First, the prison should separate violent and nonviolent offenders. It is unimaginable that the guards often throw nonviolent criminals in the same cell with violent offenders, or in solitary confinement cells resembling containers.

I know of one person who was detained for two days for not paying a $100 fine. He wanted to save $100 and went to the prison to sleep for two days instead. Do you know what happened? Within forty—eight hours, he was brutally raped by a group of dozens of violent prisoners. He was mistreated so much that his spirit has not fully recovered.

None of us, especially prison staff, wants violence to happen in prison activities but it can still happen easily. I think the guards could designate areas where prisoners who do not cause violence or pose a threat can be placed.

As Venerable Giới Hương suggests, only a small number of prisoners appear violent. A separation of violent and nonviolent inmates could help minimize the harm caused by violent criminals and protect the well— being of nonviolent individuals.

Thomas Joachim

                                        ***

 3.8.    Causes Of Crime

Dear Sư cô,

Thinking about the harmful effects of crime, sometimes we are afraid and do not want to think about what causes people to commit so many crimes.

Some American citizens are willing to support the construction of a new prison, but they do not want their taxpayer money to be paid to schools, education or for projects to help young people graduate. They lack the deep thought that if young people grow up in poverty, without education, without opportunities; if they grow up in a non—basic family, then of course they will sin. That is what pushes them into breaking the law.

Regarding the causes, remedies such as imprisonment, there are many issues I would like to share with you.

You know, sometimes punishment does not make prisoners better, but instead makes them bitter and angry as leopards. They are in jail and have no vocational or professional skills. After being freed and unprepared for life, they began to relapse again. This is one of the reasons why recidivism in prisons continues to increase.

They leave prison, then go back to prison because they don’t know what to do to support themselves, support their wives, raise children and the only way to make easy money is to commit crime. Therefore, the prison system should teach the prisoners careers instead of focusing solely on imprisonment.

If we truly believe that prisoners have been reformed, we should send them to vocational training programs and let them have jobs. A prison sentence can be shortened to allow an offender to work and address the legal case against them in a way that prevents any disturbances or further violations of the law.

It also proves that they have been transformed into good people. Society can create opportunities by offering incentives, such as exempting new offenders from taxes, similar to how employers are encouraged to hire individuals with disabilities. However, prisoners who have committed murder should not work in an office but instead do manual labor. This aligns with a valuable principle, as Thomas Alva Edison once expressed a view of life: “My fatherland is the world, and my religion is good deeds.”

Andrew Berns

                                          ***

 3.9.    Unfortunate

Dear Sư cô,

The fact that there are many young prisoners in unfortunate circumstances makes us heartbroken and unable to sleep. Just for a few moments of impudent action, and they must be imprisoned and burdened with regret for life.

Just like the Black teenager, Bigger Thomas, the main character in the movie Native Son which we watched on TV Sunday night. Bigger Thomas gagged a drunken girl, the daughter of his blind hostess, to prevent her from making noise, which caused the girl to die of suffocation. Then to hide his guilt, he put her body into the oven of the mansion. Because of a bit of carelessness, foolishness and no lucidity, Bigger Thomas the innocent, honest nineteen—year—old son, killed his life in the darkness of the prison. We hope that is a fair court to decide the fate of the offenders. Please consider and weigh before judging them guilty. In society there are many such carelessness. What a pity!

David

3.10.    Irrigation Of Seeds

Dear Sư cô,

There is a metaphor of “watering seeds” used to describe the things in my life. I used my cultivating power to make them stronger in body, speech, and mind. They become deeply rooted in the body and mind and manifest in me. This seed can be positive or negative.

When I was eight, I began to steal the belongings of my family and my classmates. Now looking back, I see that I planted the seed of stealing and watered it, making it grow even more. I know how we allow others to grow the infected bad seeds in our gardens. Then we water them in our lives and don’t really wake up until something happens to awaken.

My parents died early. My uncle raised me from the time I was five months old until I was fifteen. He is a person I admire and love. He never treated me badly, except for my own foolishness. As the years passed, I believed that I was ignorant and so I never really wanted to go to school. This strengthened the seeds of negative thought and watered the belief that I could not learn. Once I allowed the negative seeds to permeate and grow in life, the positive seeds of faith, hope and love became uprooted. These positive seeds must continue to be strengthened in their lifetime, otherwise they will weaken, die, and steal my joy. It’s true.

At the age of eighteen, I was a selfish, stupid, and arrogant person. I assaulted people, stole things and made fun of my victims when they suffered. Relatives tried to persuade me to do better. I smiled and did not listen. In me, there was no love or sympathy at all. When the bad seed became big and sumptuous, I felt that I could not live. I just kept the seeds of the wandered wild so stinking that everyone shunned me. Worst of all, when I realized this was happening, I found it hard to control what was spreading in the forest. Its roots were too deep, they couldn’t stop.

When we go through many years of nurturing the poisons of greed, hatred, and delusion, then the result of greed, hatred and delusion arise. That is, of course, the result. Know this and awaken to the pain and injuries caused by its devastation. I feel the pain of those who have been hurt by me. I stopped when I realized what I was doing and tried my best to uproot old seeds, plant new seeds to bring hope, compassion, and love. After that, I tried to encourage others to join me in uprooting wild creepers and planting new varieties of flowers.

Our mind is like a garden. Please fertilize the soil, sprinkling water adequately to encourage growth and remove any weeds. If we try to overcome the negatives, try to water the good seeds, this brings joy to the eyes and warmth in our hearts. We will be happy to find ourselves healthy, growing, and compassionate. This gives us hope and wishes for all possible good things. This is me learning how to water the seeds.

I am also learning to practice the Dharma, spending time, and patiently removing the wild weeds in the forest of my mind. I aim to make it a beautiful garden full of fragrance and sweet fruit, whether in this life or many lives to come. The results will be truly remarkable.

Love and mindfulness create many immeasurable benefits. We will become beautiful flowers when we plant positive seeds and water them with love, compassion, sympathy, and joy. I see the brilliance of the fertile orchard arising from positive seeds (when the mind is healthy and promising). No matter how long the irrigation takes, it will always help us grow. Eventually, we will find ourselves nourishing the seeds we have helped grow, both for ourselves and others, helping them thrive and become positive seeds.

Love, compassion and joy are beautiful gardens to

admire and leave as we pass through life.

Alfredo O’Kray

3.11.    Prisoners Are Humans

Dear Jacob,

There are many prisoners who grew up in poor families with parents addicted to drugs, smoking, and alcohol. As teenagers, prisoners always suffered from disappointment. It’s true. If we understand and address such situations before a crime is committed, we can prevent much harm to both the individuals involved and others.

The Buddha taught that even though someone is a prisoner, we should still show respect, because Buddha nature is inherent in all beings. Society is the collective expression of individuals in this universe. There is no place where we can go, there is no place we can live without being related to everyone and everything. We exist through dependent origination, as we coexist in relationships, including with prisoners.

It is very beneficial to help a prisoner about to be freed to return to society. Their life is combined with the outside social life. When a person is imprisoned or released, the entire family and circle of friends are affected. Another impact has been felt.

Society exists in prisons. Many people come to the prison, not only as prisoners but also as guards, chaplains, medical doctors, staff, teachers, and spiritual instructors. Their methods have a profound impact on the prisoners and can help save their lives.

Reading the Dhammapada or offering a wise word can help prisoners reduce their craving, hatred, and ignorance, providing them with the insight to reflect and prevent themselves from falling into violence. Knowing a Zen master’s favorite teaching can transform a prisoner’s way of life. The profound benefit of embodying this wisdom not only saves the prisoner’s life and the lives of their family but also helps prevent the suffering of the victim’s family. The fragrance of a peaceful mind resonates far and wide.

Monastic chaplains are dedicated to supporting prisoners’present and future lives by guiding them to reflect on and master their intentions. They are concerned with their progress on the path to awakening and enlightenment in this life, and beyond in future lives. Some prisoners, despite facing obstacles, are sincere in their efforts. If placed in different circumstances in the future, they can transcend their past karma, becoming gentle Buddhas.

I have heard that some inmates were involved in criminal conspiracies, but once in prison, there was little they could do. Many people on the outside commit crimes but have not been arrested. Some Buddhist prisoners may also be involved, though we on the outside may not be aware of it. They are familiar with the cycle of suffering in samsara and often come to see how their own ignorance, hatred, and attachment cause them pain. They tend to be more willing to acknowledge their weaknesses and faults than others and strive to rise spiritually.

The prison environment is harsh and cold, making it difficult to cultivate a tranquil and peaceful mind. In such an environment, kindness and compassion become incredibly valuable for finding happiness. Prisoners know they can create pain, and they want to change. The ability to develop Bodhicitta (a good heart) and benefit from a mind imbued with compassion resonates deeply with them, inspiring them, because they, too, are fully capable, just like us.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

3.12.    Eliminating Wrath

Dear Ethan,

There are ethical principles for human life and when violated, they come with a very high price. Every spiritual, philosophical, and religious tradition emphasizes love, harmony, forgiveness, and responsibility. These are not mere suggestions but guiding principles for how to live. If we follow them, we will rise, otherwise, we will suffer. Some people harbor hatred and resentment towards criminals, but this should not be the case. We must open our minds to tolerance and understanding. A loving attitude will help reduce crime, violence, poverty, despair, and of course will lessen both hatred and indignation.

Society is suffering from these destructive attitudes. In recent years, the suicide rate among adolescents and incidents of murder have significantly increased. Unskilled children may come to believe that it is normal to despise and destroy those they consider enemies. However, this is not a healthy philosophy of life. We must work to counter the impact of violence and malice portrayed in movies, television, and the media, so that children are not influenced by these harmful messages. It is not easy for children to quickly forget negative views or attitudes, and we must guide them towards more compassionate and constructive ways of thinking.

We should cultivate a harmonious and forgiving attitude, even towards those who wrong us. This does not mean we allow them to steal from or harm our community. Of course, we should not let our children grow up doing cruel or unethical things, but if they make mistakes, we should not hate them. We should not punish them so harshly that they are left with no hope of redemption. We should not cast them out to fend for themselves. The Buddhist spirit encourages us to extend the same compassion to all prisoners. However, in reality, many prisoners are abandoned and treated as if they are no better than wild animals. This only inflates outrage and hatred, making things worse. By doing so, we make criminals more hardened, selfish, and violent—creating professional criminals rather than offering them a chance for transformation.

Ancient texts tell us that many saints were once criminals, drinkers, rapists, or murderers. St. Paul, for example, was once Saul of Tarsus, a vicious executioner who killed many of Jesus’ disciples. King Ashoka of India was a bloodthirsty ruler who slaughtered thousands of people in his quest to conquer other lands. However, one day, as he watched the blood of innocent people flow in the streams, the king experienced a sudden awakening to the infinite compassion of Buddhism. This led him to become a devout Buddhist, transforming both himself and many others. He made significant contributions to Buddhist history, inscribing Buddhist teachings on stone pillars and bringing the message of the Buddha’s liberation to neighboring countries. Thanks to his efforts, Buddhism spread, and it is through this legacy that we know Buddhism today. In religious history, it has been shown that many individuals who are saints today were once prisoners, and many murderers, who were once criminals, can become saints in the future.

Once we lose faith in our potential and in the Buddha nature, we enter a state of narrowness and selfishness, which leads to misery and regression. In contrast, embracing bliss and altruism opens the path to growth and peace. Right now, there may be sages forgotten in prison cells or on the streets. We should look for opportunities to create positive exchanges and guidance, rather than allowing the seeds of goodness to wither and die.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

3.13.    Harm

Dear Sư cô,

Can you imagine how a person feels miserable when he realizes that his whole life has been driven by selfishness, especially after recognizing that he has hurt others with his crimes and violent actions?

Can you imagine how joyful one feels when he realizes his mistakes, overcomes his mistakes, and is learning to respect and calm others?

That person is me. I ask for acknowledgment of my late repentance (being late, it is better than nothing). I apologize to all those we prisoners have treated poorly. I hope they can understand our remorse.

Joshua

 

3.14.                           Away From The Flame Of Anger

Dear Sư cô,

Most of the prisoners did not notice the dangers of their anger fire and kept blaming it on one person or another. Living in the indifferent environment of prison, inmates are easily exposed to rudeness, hatred, struggle, dissent, and anger. Anger, like a fire, destroys the forest of merit. It can devastate us, burning relationships from the inside out until nothing remains. Anger can strip away our humanity and take away the power of Buddha nature. For a prisoner, anger is a deadly force if not skillfully managed, Anger has the ability to cut and shred us into small pieces. However, if we understand that no matter how fierce the outside world is, a calm mind brings peace—a peaceful mind creates a peaceful world—we can avoid fueling the fire of anger. So, please don’t give the trigger to anyone and blame anyone. Please cool your mind.

Jayden

3.15.    Hunted Animal

Dear Sư cô,

When I was eight years old, my uncle would often take me hunting for rabbits and deer. He taught me that after being chased and shot at, these animals often run in circles. Hunters simply need to wait nearby. Within five or ten minutes, the rabbits or deer would usually return to the same spot, making it easy to catch them without much effort.

Looking back, I feel deeply sorry for the animals we shot. They ran towards death, their bodies shaking, drenched in sweat and in a state of crisis. Sometimes they would pause a few seconds to catch their breath, unaware that the suffering of death was ahead because they were instinctively running back to the familiar path. In the same way, we have become so accustomed to the vicious cycles of our own temperaments that we can’t stop, even when we’re at a dangerous point in our lives. We cling to bad habits of smoking, opium, promiscuity, gambling, laziness and theft. But unlike the beast, we know our situation clearly. We know what is toxic, and we have spiritual teachers and nun chaplains who show us the way to escape the suffering of the wheel of samsara. Yet, despite this guidance, we do not practice. Not because we lack knowledge and wisdom. The problem is that we are lazy, weak, and undisciplined. The rabbit and the deer use all their strength to escape suffering—guns, dogs, and hunters—yet do we make the effort to escape our own suffering? What are we clinging to? Happiness or suffering? We call ourselves civilized and cultured, yet we often consider animals to be inferior. Why do we use our intelligence and power to harm these blessed creatures, causing them to die? This is a koan, a question worthy of deep reflection in tonight’s meditation session.

Daniel

 

3.16.    Death Penalty

Dear Sư cô,

The most likely consequence for criminals is paying with their own life, the death penalty. Fortunately, due to amnesty, this sentence may be reduced to life imprisonment instead of execution.

The sentence of execution is not solely based on the fact that a homicide has occurred, but also on the manner in which the crime was committed. Thus, simply committing murder does not automatically lead to execution. However, if the murder is accompanied by other crimes such as rape, arson, drug trafficking, robbery, kidnapping, prison breaks, abuse of children, the elderly, disabled individuals, terrorism, or bombings, the death penalty may be imposed. Therefore, the death sentence is not only for murder but also for crimes that involve additional cruelty. In some cases, individuals are sentenced to multiple life imprisonments, which means the total time in prison is equivalent to serving several lifetimes.

Depending on the laws of each state, many states in the United States have abolished the death penalty, opting instead for life sentences without the possibility of parole. In Wisconsin, for example, a vote held in November 2007 resulted in 60 percent of state citizens supporting the decision to not impose the death penalty in the state. The death penalty may have deterred criminals from committing violent crimes. Almost all of the prisoners’ letters show repentance and guilt for their foolish ignorance. A moment of harm can have lifelong consequences. Many individuals who have sinned have revealed the shame, pain and damage they have caused to others.

There are lifelong sinners who carry the heavy burden of conscience, weighed down by the crimes they have committed against others. The memories of their wrongdoings and the sense of overwhelming guilt haunt their thoughts daily. As a result, the cycle of suffering within their minds rotates forever. This is the greatest harm to an offender.

Below is an illustration of two letters written by Amos King—one to the criminal Henri and another to himself as a ten—year—old boy. In these letters, Amos King confesses his repentance, reflecting on the harm caused by his crimes and the seeds of wrongdoing that took root in his childhood. These letters were written before Amos King was executed on February 26, 2003, in the state of Florida.

Alexander

3.17.    Letter From A Death-Row Prisoner

K.C. let me know a little bit about you and your situation right now. The reason is because you are “special,” although you may not be aware. Many prisoners love and care about you more than you do. They asked me to write this letter for you.

At first, maybe you think I’m just a scary unfortunate prisoner who is trying to scare you so you will obey my orders. That is not completely right. For the past twenty— seven, I have been an unfortunate prisoner. At one time, I lost my memory and would have been unable to write a letter like this. When you receive this letter, I may have been executed by the state of Florida, tied to a stretcher, and injected with poison to die. A month and a half ago, I had been measuring the size of death clothes. That was the third and perhaps the last time, because I would be executed on February 24, 2003 and possibly I am dead to the other side of the world when you receive this letter. For security reasons, the pen I’m holding can bend easily, so writing is difficult. Therefore, most death row inmates are no longer writing letters.

Henri, for about twenty—five years of my time on death row, I witnessed fifty people executed, twelve committed suicide, and two were killed by other death row inmates. About fifteen to twenty people died from heart attacks, cancer, and other illnesses. Maybe out of about 400 to 500 prisoners, most of them are sentenced to life, have been here with me and have moved elsewhere. Some are lucky to be acquitted, but it is difficult to recover to return to normal life.

Just like you, Henri, most of us are young and have a feeling of being a champion, being intellegent and being able to avoid being caught. Henri, that sounds like a good idea, a good plan, but it’s really foolishness. Hey Henri, what proves that to you is the countless prisoners being imprisoned with you and millions more in this country and around the world.

I have seen and known hundreds and thousands of people who have wasted youth and life in prison. Henri, you probably know, on the path of a criminal’s life, most of the troubles that come to us are due to the people we communicate with and the people in our gang. One of your friends could shoot a person or pull a trigger with an evil intent you disagree with and you could get a sentence for complicity.

Henri, without discipline and self—restraint, we cannot be a real human being, only an animal against ourselves and society. Legal discipline is required to uphold, regulate society, and to treat crimes. With self—esteem, self— discipline, respect for others and living a clean life, you can enjoy a happy, peaceful, and comfortable life. Living on the sidelines of society, crime and foolishness are not good paths. Be content with what you and your family have, be patient, be diligent, and do not challenge those around you. Materiality and the pursuit of matter at all costs are not an authentic way of life and purpose.

Do not let badness and vileness rule you. Overcoming the temptations, you can accomplish all that you desire.

Previously, I was a good person. I hope you understand what I mean. Please believe me, you will know these things from experience, if you live that long. Most people I knew when I was your age now are dead and I’m about to die to follow them too.

Just now on the phone, I cried, saying goodbye to a longtime friend who was also a great support. How heartbreaking to hear the farewell (rather than the goodbye) of a person who is alive and facing death shortly. A few days ago, I also wrote a farewell letter to my longtime mail friends. Henri, see that you are full of beauty and talent. This is up to you. You have the power. If my suffering, experience, and death and what I’m sharing with you will stop you from wasting your own life and hurting others, then use the time to write letters. It is worth it for you. I am satisfied what I have done for you.

There is a holiness in knowing values and respect for life. Try to live meaningfully and happily. This is my prayer to you and all the young people out there within the prison fence. Please don’t go astray like I did.

Loving all as brotherhood in four directions.

Yours sincerely,

Amos Lee King

Amos King was executed on February 26, 2003

in the US state of Florida.

3.18.                                    Letter To A Ten-Year-Old Boy

February 8, 2003

I intend to write this letter to you as my last living act on February 23, 2003, the day before I am to be executed.

A few days before I was executed, I was sitting on a bed [on death row] while a nurse wearing a mask searched on my arms looking for which vein was suitable for injecting poison like anesthetic to let me die gently.

You know, when I was ten, I was a stubborn, selfish child who found a way to get what he wanted or would get angry and dissatisfied. I often explored and played in the forest. Whenever I wanted to listen to my parents, I would listen to them, or else I would try to avoid them because I knew they were always giving orders. I was the center of my own universe. It seemed I attained almost everything I desired.

In a civilized society, there is a need for discipline, law, and punishment for those who do not obey the law. You hope for an education, pursuing goals and dreams. Your freedom and liberation are based on these items [obedience, discipline, law, punishment], just as your parents have given birth to you, loved you, nurtured you, went to work to take care of you. They provide food, clothing, education, and they protect you. Your parents do everything for you, even if they have to make huge sacrifices for you. You are not aware of this—because of you—they are ready to sacrifice even their lives.

Reflecting on the past, I clearly see why stubbornness and hardship have hurt me. It led my parents and family to send me to re—education camps. Now, I am in prison and facing my death sentence. I did not listen to my parents’ teachings because I was rebellious, which made me inclined to follow my friends’ temptations, create many distractions, start a criminal life, drink alcohol, become addicted to drugs and cigarettes. I gradually moved towards the heavier drugs, getting deeper and deeper into the path of sin.

This does not happen right away, but step—by—step. Disobeying parents, breaking the rules and then the law. All of these are one, like interconnected chains. If you disobey your parents who love you, give you life, and want to give you the best, you can easily break the law and do evil.

On the path towards sin, you will grow firm and strong in your actions, feeling as though you are untouchable. The threat of being sent to re—education camps and even prison does not make you flinch. But be aware that young people in re—education schools sometimes do things that lead to imprisonment, where they fall into the hands of evil criminals who have nothing to lose and take advantage of the teens. Many people who go to prison for minor offenses often find themselves trapped in circumstances that lead to life sentences, the death penalty, or death in prison, or are forced to kill another prisoner to survive. A lot of prisoners were raped by other prisoners with AIDS.

The most painful scene was a man deprived of masculinity by the rape of another man and the victim began to act like a woman.

You can avoid these evil things by obeying those who love you, behaving properly, caring for your friends, and just wanting the best for everyone. This is the noble path to goodness, the way of self—respect to follow. If that’s the case, you will find satisfaction in obeying, learning, and making your parents proud and happy. One day, you’ll want your children to do the same for you. The cycle will continue with the next generation.

Nurturing dignity and discipline will help you as you grow up and become a man. You will see the benefits when you grow up.

Harassment makes you constantly feel insecure, afraid that someone will find out and you will be punished. This tells you that you’re not living a righteous life. A righteous life is one that you must live for yourself.

Like a ten—year—old, sometimes you feel lonely or you do not get adequate care. Let’s remember, parents have other responsibilities. Lack of attention doesn’t mean they don’t love you and don’t think about you. Almost all parents want to be closer to their children but are often held back by earning a livelihood and other concerns.

Before I finish, I wish you the best of luck. The present and future all depends on you.

In the Bible, John II in the Third Linage taught: “Dear all, what I hope is that you will be prosperous, healthy, and your mind will be at peace.” I also wish that for you.

Goodbye,

Amos King Amos King was executed on February 26, 2003

in Florida, US.

3.19.    Consequences Of Crime On Victims

Ronald Clements wrote an article, “Scars and Catharsis: A Prison Class on the Impact of Crime on Victims,”¹⁷ as follows:

At about 12:30 in the afternoon, after one last morning filled with anxiety, a corrections officer calls over the intercom for the eight of us to go to the visiting room. Once there, we change from our personal clothes, mostly t—shirts and sweatpants, into standard dress—out clothes: grey canvas pants with only an elastic band to secure them and white button—up shirts, stiff from too much starch. Then, we wait. Some of the men smoke cigarettes just outside the door while others engage in a light banter that sounds forced under the circumstances.

Hands, the hands of men convicted of vicious murders in Missouri courtrooms, are shaking. Finally, after nearly an hour of our own private thoughts and fears, we receive a call instructing us to enter a prepared classroom. Time to face the victims …

The class on the Impact of Crime on Victims originated as a joint effort between the California Youth Authority

17. Ronald Clements wrote an article, “Scars and Catharsis: A Pris- on Class on the Impact of Crime on Victims.” https://thubtenchodron. org/2006/05/forgiveness— and—purification/

and Mothers Against Drunk Driving. The state of Missouri adopted the program statewide for its bulging prison system. In August 2000, a group of men incarcerated at the Potosi Correctional Center participated in the initial two—week, forty—hour trial program which culminated in an emotionally charged visit with the victims of various crimes. Thanks in part to enthusiastic support of the initial group, interest in the class has flourished. Now, more than one hundred men in this prison have completed the class. I am one of those men. The following report is based on my experience in the class. Out of respect for their privacy, the names of Impact Panel members have been changed.

In October 2000, nine of us entered the classroom on a Tuesday night; no man among us had a conviction of less than second degree homicide. The majority of us, myself included, were serving sentences of life without parole for first degree murder convictions. We came with notebooks and pens; our intention was to learn. The class took place three or four nights a week for two weeks, four to six hours a night, so it was fairly intense.

At each successive meeting, all of which lasted well past the scheduled four hours, we received a stapled lesson packet and watched a video on each of the following topics: property crime, drugs and society, drunk driving and death injury, domestic violence, child maltreatment, assault and sexual assaults, victims of gang violence, violent crime, robbery, and homicide. The facilitators, three or four members of the prison staff, encouraged open discussion and it didn’t take much for everyone to get involved. After these classes, we were to meet with the families of crime victims—not the victims of our particular actions, but those who had suffered similarly at the hands of others.

The consensus expressed by the imprisoned participants during these discussions, both discussions amongst ourselves and those with the families of victims, contradicted much of what is commonly believed about convicts doing time in a maximum—security prison. Many of the men in that room will never see the outside again. They spoke with absolute candor, which took the form of ideas anyone else in our society might express: the drastic need to reduce crime, especially its escalation among juveniles and approval of police interventions. For these men, a desperate need for atonement and a deep sense of regret for past deeds motivated them to volunteer for the class.

Much discussion stemmed from the deft handling of each night’s topic by the facilitators. The videos provided the emotional impact. Understanding how the effects of crime ripple outwards like concentric circles—from a decline in the victim’s physical and mental health to increased financial burdens, to the effects on the larger community—carried its own educational and moral value but witnessing the real human face of agony affected us on an even more profound level. Crime does not discriminate on the basis of gender, social strata, culture, or race. Each video presented an unflinching realistic look at people who are suffering the consequences of it.

When robbers invade one mother’s home, she has to choose which son to protect. A six—year—old girl begs a 911 operator for help while her father murders the rest of the family one by one, audibly in the background. While one mother mourns the death of her daughter, an inadvertent casualty of gang retaliation, another mother has to endure the indignity of her son’s funeral being dominated by the members of his gang. A son seeking answers to his mother’s death finds his resentment deepening during a meeting with her killer; while in another prison visiting room, a man extends his hand in friendship and forgiveness to his assailant. Although poignant, these videotaped stories could only convey to us an inkling of what actually meeting crime victims would be like for us.

On the fourth night of class, our group shrunk to eight. To paraphrase the man who dropped out, “It was more than I bargained for.” The unadorned honesty of this class intimidated many men. In fact, some liken the experience to a court hearing. Perhaps this man foresaw the intensity of the moment when we would meet victims face to face. True, the facilitators, who we considered fellow participants, helped prepare us, but that wouldn’t make the visit any easier.

Then, Saturday afternoon came, when after forty hours in the classroom and a morning filled with private thoughts and fears, we met the victims. Our facilitators, along with the assistant superintendent and the prison psychologist, had arrived before us. The desks in the classroom, usually set in a horseshoe pattern, were now arranged in two rows facing one another. We sat in one row, a fairly young culturally diverse group. The panel of victims silently entered a door and sat down directly across from us. Also culturally diverse, they presented a greater age range and were mostly female. One by one, they told us how violent crimes had shattered their lives.

Kevin’s parents began. Both were middle—aged and had quiet demeanors. Kevin’s father described coping with the loss of Kevin to an apparent highway accident, only to learn later from the mortuary that shotgun pellets were discovered in Kevin’s head during the preparation of his body for the funeral. The police could find no motive for his murder.

Two women followed. Bonnie was twice a victim of rape at the hands of acquaintances. Sheri was a victim of incest when she was a young girl and of gang rape later in her life. Bonnie’s husband provided gentle unspoken support with his presence. Sheri relied on her own diamond—hard anger and admirable will. “I do not consider myself a victim,” she stated. “I consider myself a survivor.”

Trish and Carol then shared how their sister was discovered drowned in the bathtub, murdered by her own husband. The legal proceedings over the murder were frustrating and difficult. Then they described how the husband is challenging them over the right to mark their sister’s grave. He continues his efforts to block them from doing so from behind penitentiary walls, where he is serving a sentence with possible parole.

Eighteen years after the murder of her daughter, Ellen still feels the loss. She works closely with families of murdered members and heads up the Impact Panel. Ellen shared how a stranger abducted her daughter from work, raped and then killed her with a tire iron. Ellen and her husband discovered the body. The white—hot pain still lives in her, but Ellen has channeled it into efforts to improve the often—ignored rights of victims. She works to promote tougher laws with longer sentences and to keep better track of perpetrators who sometimes slip through the legal system due to errors, as did her daughter’s killer.

The simple straightforward manner in which these people recounted their tragedies delivered the real impact. Despite certain similarities they had—universal pain, frustration, and adjustment to the sudden void where a loved one once existed—the individual loss for each speaker stood out with clarity. Maybe we could not fathom just how deep that void was, but we certainly felt sorrow for these courageous people, who shared their personal suffering with a group of convicted felons. “Now,” Ellen said, “tell us why you are here.”

She was asking not why we were incarcerated, but why we had come to the Impact of Crime on Victims program. This was the only real statement put to us, so most of our responses didn’t go into much detail regarding the events leading up to our imprisonment, though participants in some cases certainly elaborated, but instead focused more on getting an idea of the victims’ perspective or expressing sorrow for the crime we committed.

Every man responded with obvious difficulty. The small glimpse into the private hell that these people endure every minute, hour, and day triggered profound reactions in us. Compassion rose up naturally among us in the face of their naked suffering, but serious introspection came with reluctance. We had preyed on, taken away, and destroyed others’ lives, and we had to live with the awful truth of these selfish past deeds. Staring into honesty so bright can be a shock to the system. I understand now why some men refuse to sign up for this program. Still, the level of the honesty was incredible, and some told of their own victimization in prison.

Prisons conditions already apathetic people to care even less, but caring is what makes us human. Inside that classroom, I felt I care. And it hurt. I felt not only the pain of lives taken from loved ones, but the sometimes— overwhelming burden of my regret. I felt so ashamed of myself. Maybe I didn’t have the family of the person I killed before me, but these men and women had experienced similar losses. I couldn’t tell my victim’s family how sorry I was, but I was compelled to tell this group of people who deserved so much more than an apology. Each man expressed similar sentiments to the panel, not as pleas for forgiveness, but as admissions of honest sorrow in tears.

Buddhists refer to sangha or spiritual community. Sangha arises when people come together for a greater purpose, an awakening of the sacred. For those involved in this program—prisoners, victims, and families—healing and humanity are the greater purpose. No one embraced afterward, but a change in the atmosphere filled the room. Does this program help speed the healing process for these wounded families? Many members I have talked to say that it has. As we prepared to leave that day, Bonnie’s husband told us, “If what you said is sincere, then you’re obliged to make a difference. Take what you feel back into the prison and help prevent violence.”

Customarily, after this meeting, there is one follow— up meeting with the families of crime victims, and it has a much different dynamic. Whereas the initial meeting is really intense and doesn’t feature a lot of dialogue—mostly one side speaks, then the other—the follow—up is more about sharing back and forth on both sides. Personally, I’ve made an effort to continue to meet with some of these families and have seen many of them up to a dozen times or more. It has been a way for me to give back to society.

Though this program could not happen as anything less than a true collaborative effort with victims from the community and people behind bars, the words here can only express what the program means to me. It gives me a reason to live after robbing someone of their life. I can do nothing to replace that life, but this program provides a way for me to give back something of what I have taken. This program can reach more than just incarcerated people. Anyone can lose their humanity. Anyone can lose a loved one to crime. The trick, which lies at the heart of this class, is to feel it. Feel for your neighbors. Show compassion for your fellow human beings. Simply feel.

The staff for Impact of Crime on Victims trained some of us incarcerated people to be facilitators for new groups. We were also able to revise the curriculum. Several years later, we had a chance to use the curriculum we wrote in its entirety and to run almost every aspect of the class ourselves. We were in many ways breaking new ground for the program. Another first was that this was a protective custody group, and we were all in general population— policy says that the two should never come into contact, so I thought it was awesome that they trusted us to do this.

This was probably the single best class I’ve ever been in, and in a lot of ways the hardest. It was a definite challenge for me to hear some of the things I heard. The level of honesty in this group was completely open from almost the first night of the program. The fact that they opened up like they did to us, a relative group of strangers, was a real privilege. I never thought I would see the day where I would sit in a room in a level five, maximum— security prison and cry unabashedly with my head on another man’s shoulder from hearing about the suffering in his life. It was such a growing experience for me and for all the facilitators.

Although I was not the main person who facilitated this class, I did have a moment to speak. For many years, it has been a luxury to not have to talk about the life I took, and I think that in many ways, I’ve deliberately tried to put distance between the present moment and the man I am today and that moment and that teenage boy I once was. My reason for that, I believe, was a way of saying that person wasn’t me, even though I recently wrote a letter of apology to my victim’s family. I feel that I have always taken responsibility for the crime I had committed, but if the topic didn’t come up, that was fine with me.

During the homicide chapter in this class, I stood up in front of everyone and told what I had done and how many people I had hurt by my actions. It was so difficult, but in a way very liberating. The acknowledgement of what I had done and the fact that I could see just how many people I had hurt was a necessary part of my growth as a compassionate being. I believe it is important for the facilitators to be willing to speak up and take responsibility for their actions so that participants will be more likely to do the same and will be more willing to look at how their actions affect others. Sometimes it’s easy for me to lose sight of what goes on in this program, seeing only the participants as the students who learn from it. But I experience constant growth through this program if I am mindful.

Ronald Clements Dedicated to S.N.

This is a woolen panel of the Triple Jewel (Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha) made by Tojin, a Buddhist prisoner.

                                                           *********

Chapter 4

THE CHANTING RITUAL

V

enerable Tonen Sara O’Connor is seventy—five years old and her health is relatively weak. She is training a group of Buddhist men and women to participate in conducting volunteer programs at correctional centers

and may replace her later.

Here are some of the rules that spiritual guides in prisons should know:

1. Sincerely respect each individual
2. Trust and rejoice in the
3. Keep the promise to visit the prisoner once a
4. Be available for visiting prisoners from Monday to Friday. The program is limited on weekdays due to the needs for the chapel locations, chaplain time and visiting time, which is convenient only on
5. Visits are required throughout the day, as driving time ranges from one and a half to three hours at a time, except in Racine, where the meeting is usually between 10 a.m. and 11:30 a.m. and we usually return to our temple about 12:30 p.m.

6. Be willing to seriously learn and practice the principles of the correctional institution.
7. Attend training sessions organized by Ven. Tonen (probably on weekends), who will accompany you to the prison for your first visit and guide you through the prison’s volunteer

Responding to the call to teach in these prisons, many volunteers, including me, also attended as instructors. In order for the prisoners to understand his or her religious studies, we also have brief Buddhist lessons so that the inmates can understand the basics of Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha and the chanting ritual as follows:

1. What does the Buddha mean? Buddha means “the Enlightened One” and the first time this title was given to anyone was to a bodhisattva named Siddhartha or Shakyamuni Buddha. The Buddha lived around the middle of the fifth and fourth centuries B.C. in northern The Buddha’s great dedication is to show the way to end human suffering. He attained enlightenment during the third watch of the rising of the morning star. After that, the Buddha spent forty—nine years teaching to spread this liberation message. He has transformed a vast community and Buddhism has now spread to many countries around the world.
2. The teachings of the Buddha are called Dharma. The Buddha taught that all sentient beings are subject to We suffer because we don’t get what we want, we can’t arrange this world for ourselves or satisfy our bottomless desires. The Buddha taught many methods for us to overcome suffering and to prevent greed clinging to the desires of “I” (self). This attachment to the idea of “me and mine” (self and self’s possessions) is wrong. The pain is intensified because attachment leads to so much suffering. Dharma is the way to end that suffering.

Why is it wrong? Because there is no permanent eternal “I” to sustain its desires. This is a terrifying delusion that most of us get lost in, creating this world to meet our desires. Buddha realized that everything is not eternal and is always changing. Impermanence is a fundamental element of existence. The Buddha also discovered that everything is interconnected and exists only through mutual dependence. Everything is inseparable. The Buddha taught that the result of all things is the result of causes and conditions and it does not arise independently. If “I” exists only in relation to everything else and if “I” changes with everything else, then there is no eternal “I” in the center of this world.

• 
  The Buddha taught that everything is interrelated according to Dependent Origination and thus it is wrong to accept the “I” as the center of this universe.

4.1.    Practicing Rules

1. Leave your shoes at the entrance to the chapel.
2. If you use a cushion, open the cabinet for
3. Go in gently and sit facing the wall, sit on the cushion or on a chair.

4. After about 20—25 minutes of meditation, we stand up and recite aloud the Sutta of Compassion (Metta Sutta) and Heart Sutra (Prajna Paramita). Chanting the five precepts and Bodhi mind remind us of the basis of the Buddha’s teaching that we vow to As part of the ceremony, we face the image of the Buddha, kneeling down, prostrating with five parts of body touching the ground. This does not mean we bow down to worship an image. This is a traditional form of respect for the Buddha’s teachings and seeing his image reminds us to follow his example of virtue and diligence.
5. After the ceremony, everyone is seated on the cushion and the monastic chaplains will give Dharma talks. Next is the time for discussion and
6. At the end, the monastic chaplains and the inmates clear the altar, the cushions, etc.
7. Those who would like to have a private meeting with the monastic chaplains during the afternoon visit when we return next month, please fill out the visiting form available (this must be registered one month in advance to allow sufficient time for permission from the camp administration).
8. The last few minutes are the time to provide Dharma materials to study or to exchange a letter of study with the nuns.
9. Finally, each member will continue to practice meditation as much as possible and further research his or her available scriptures or those in the prison while waiting for the next month’s nuns to come

for instructions.

Practicing meditation is not an instant result. The Buddha’s teaching does not provide an immediate liberation. The Buddha’s Dharma gives us the opportunity to better understand ourselves and to see through the relationship (dependent orignation) between people and people in the world we live in.

• Often in a prison camp there is a common chapel for all religions. Sometimes if the prison has too many prisoners, there are many separate chapels. The chapels are often in a separate area, relatively quiet, away from other prisoners’ rooms or living It is only for staff and prisoners who are interested in practicing their religious rites.

4.2.    Precepts

Like most religions, Buddhism guides us to nurture, promote and express compassion for all beings. Each prisoner voluntarily keeps the five precepts for the benefit of himself and others as follows:

With pure heart, Buddhists vow to give up evil.

With pure heart, Buddhists vow to practice good things. With pure heart, for the sake of all sentient beings, Buddhists undertake to observe these precepts:

1. To abstain from taking life
2. To abstain from taking what is not given
3. To abstain from sensuous misconduct
4. To abstain from intoxicants which tend to cloud the mind

5. To abstain from discussing the error of others
6. To abstain from praising yourself and lowering
7. others
8. To abstain from defaming the Dharma
9. To abstain from malice, hatred, or harm to anyone
10. To abstain from destroying the Triple Gem

(Buddha, Dharma, Sangha)

Buddhists promise mutual assistance, following Buddha’s teaching to respect all sentient beings, to practice and awaken. Therefore, the practice is for us to examine our own minds.

After meditating thirty minutes, we follow the chanting ritual as follows:

• The Chanting Ritual In Wisconsin Prisons
  • Praising the Triple Gem (Buddha, Dharma, and

When we refer to the Buddha, the Enlightened One, we are referring to our true nature, while this body is impermanent, temporary, and dependent.) Therefore, in order to pay homage to the Buddha, we stand face—to— face and chant as follows:

1. Buddha saranam gacchami: I take refuge in the Buddha — The Perfect One (one prostration)
2. Dhammam saranam gacchami: I take refuge in the Dhamma — The Awakened Method (one prostration)

3. Sangham saranam gacchami: I take refuge in the Sangha — The Pure Monastics (one prostration)

4.3.2.  Prayers

All Buddhas throughout space and time

All honored Ones, Bodhisattvas, Mahasattvas Wisdom beyond wisdom, Maha Prajna Paramita (3 prostrations)

4.3.3.   The Discourse on Loving—kindness (Karaniya Metta Sutta)

He who is skilled in goodness and wishes to attain the state of calm should act (thus):

He should be able, upright, perfectly upright, compliant, gentle, and humble.

Contented, easily supported, with few duties, of simple livelihood, controlled in senses, discreet, not imprudent. He should not be greedily attached to families.

He should not commit any slight wrong such that other wise people might censure him. (Then he should cultivate his thoughts thus:)

May all beings be happy and secure; may their minds be contented.

Whatever living beings there may be, feeble or strong, long, stout or medium, short, small or large, seen or unseen, those dwelling far or near, those who are born and those

who are yet to be born, may all beings, without exception, be happy—minded!

Let not one deceive another nor despise any person whatsoever in any place. In anger or ill will let not one wish any harm to another.

Just as a mother would protect her only child even at the risk of her own life, even so let one cultivate a boundless heart towards all beings.

Let one’s thoughts of boundless love pervade the whole world, above, below and across, without any obstruction, without any hatred, without any enmity.

Whether one stands, walks, sits or lies down, as long as one is awake, one should maintain this mindfulness. This they say is the sublime state in this life.

Not falling into wrong views, virtuous, and endowed with insight, one gives up attachment to sense—desires. Verily, such a person does not return to enter a womb again.

4.3.4.   Heart of Great Perfect Wisdom Sutra

(Maha Prajna Paramita Hridaya Sutra, Maka Hannya Haramita Shingyo)

Avalokiteshvara Bodhisattva, when deeply practicing prajna paramita, clearly saw that all five aggregates are empty and thus relieved all suffering.

Shariputra, form does not differ from emptiness, emptiness does not differ from form.

Form itself is emptiness, emptiness itself form.

Sensations, perceptions, formations, and consciousness are also like this.

Shariputra, all Dharmas are marked by emptiness, they neither arise nor cease, are neither defiled nor pure, neither increase nor decrease.

Therefore, given emptiness, there is no form, no sensation, no perception, no formation, no consciousness;

No eyes, no ears, no nose, no tongue, no body, no mind;

No sight, no sound, no smell, no taste, no touch, no object of mind;

No realm of sight ... no realm of mind consciousness.

There is neither ignorance nor extinction of ignorance

... neither old age and death, nor extinction of old age and death;

No suffering, no cause, no cessation, no path; no

knowledge and no attainment.

With nothing to attain, a bodhisattva relies on prajna paramita and thus the mind is without hindrance.

Without hindrance, there is no fear.

Far beyond all inverted views, one realizes Nirvana.

All buddhas of past, present, and future rely on prajna paramita and thereby attain unsurpassed, complete, perfect enlightenment.

Therefore, know the prajna paramita as the great miraculous mantra, the great bright mantra, the supreme mantra, the incomparable mantra, which removes all suffering and is true, not false.

Therefore we proclaim the prajna paramita mantra, the mantra that says: “gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha.”

4.3.5.  The Confession

All beings tremble before violence. All fear death.

All love life.

See yourself in others. Then whom can you hurt? What harm can you do?

He who seeks happiness

By hurting those who seek happiness

Will never find happiness. For your brother is like you. He wants to be happy.

Never harm him.

And when you leave this life

You too will find happiness.

I repent of my hatred and ill will. (one prostration) I repent of my anger and malice. (one prostration) I repent of my greedy desires. (one prostration)

I vow to embrace compassion. (one prostration) I vow to embrace joy. (one prostration)

I vow to embrace generosity. (one prostration)

4.3.6.  The Four Great Vows

Sentient beings are numberless, I vow to free them. Desires are inexhaustible, I vow to put end them.

Dharma gates are boundless, I vow to enter them. The Buddha way is unsurpassable, I vow to realize it.

4.3.7.   Closing Verse

Practicing with Sangha is the way of awareness

Gives rise to benefits without limit.

We vow to share the fruits with all beings. We vow to offer tribute to parents, teachers, Friends and numerous beings

Who give guidance and support along the path.

(3 prostrations and upon rising, bow in gassho to one another)

4.3.8.  Returning Merit

May this merit extend universally to all, so that we together with all beings realize the Buddha way.

4.4.    Refuge Ceremony

We also occasionally organize the Refuge Ceremony for the collective or individuals. Prisoners gather at the chapel and learn the meaning of taking refuge, observing the five precepts, trying to transform ideas in the different situations that prisoners face every day.

On the day of refuge, the inmates knelt solemnly before the Buddha. Instead of the traditional gray Buddhist robes (as worn in the temple), they wore prison uniforms: the orange jumpsuits marked with their inmate codes. How sacred it is when they take their vows from the bottom of their hearts:

1. I come to rely on the Buddha, who gave me the way in life.
2. I come to rely on the Dharma, the path of compassion and understanding.
3. I come to rely on Sangha, a group of the pure monastics, willing to live an awakened

Then, at the solemn moment of the five precepts,

prisoners listen to and receive each of them:

1. The first precept: From now on for the rest of your life, you should not kill sentient This is the precept of the lay Buddhists, can you keep it?

Answer: “Yes, I can.”

2. The second precept: From now on for the rest of your life, you should not cheat or This is the precept of the lay Buddhists, can you keep it?

Answer. “Yes, I can.”

3: The third precept: From now on for the rest of your life, you should not commit adultery. This is a precept of the lay Buddhists, can you keep it?

Answer. “Yes, I can.”

4: The fourth precept: From now on for the rest of your life, you should not lie. This is the precept of lay Buddhists, can you keep it?

Answer. “Yes, I can.”

5. The fifth precept: From now on for the rest of your life, you should not drink alcohol. This is a precept for lay Buddhists, can you keep it?

Answer. “Yes, I can.”

The five precepts are the basis for a happy, selfless, self—directed life, capable of protecting and beautifying life.

The five precepts are principles that guide us towards peace, liberation, and enlightenment. The five precepts are the foundation of personal, family, and social happiness. Learning and practicing according to the five precepts, we follow the right path of Dharma. We will avoid mistakes, suffering, fear, and disappointment. We will build peace for ourselves, families, and contribute to the happy and peaceful quality of society.

At the end of the ordination, the prisoners turn to the Three Jewels to make a vow:

May all beings be freed. We seek refuge in all times.

We take refuge in Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha until attaining Nirvana.

Today in the presence of the Enlightened Ones, admiring the compassion, wisdom, and efforts of the Buddhas, we vow to generate bodhicitta for the benefit of every being. The sky is infinite, beings are numberless, I will abide in this world for the sake of many.

How noble this undertaking! The pink lotus buds are

slowly shining in the dark night of the prison.

 4.5.    The Five Precepts

Observing the five precepts taught by the Buddha, it brought me a new state of mindfulness. I maintain my behavior as a shield, as I would guard my eyes in a sandstorm. I do not want to break the precepts that I vowed to keep before the Three Jewels.

The first principle is related to nonviolence. As the source of mindfulness increased for me, I realized how often I had been guilty due to my past involvement with weapons. I made a special prayer that I would not touch guns, weapons, or any killing tools. I became aware that the accident occurred because of my involvement with weapons or weapon—like devices. When I was younger, I used to shoot at targets, never considering it as violent as using an actual weapon. I confused play, sport, and violence.

I picked up a rubber band, stretched it and pulled it with my index finger to shoot at my friend. As I squinted to aim, the strap became loose, and the shot accidentally hit my eyelids. I was really in pain. I had hurt myself. I was deeply shocked by this sudden realization.

I used to use such tools as weapons, never realizing the harm they could cause. If I shot my friend, it would really hurt him. Turns out I hurt myself. I had been using weapons and injuring other people but in the end, I hurt myself. In our culture, we accept violence and the use of weapons without realizing how often or how easily this happens. From the smallest actions to the most dangerous, I accepted violence and played with increasingly harmful things. It feels like this violent habit has been ingrained in me for countless lifetimes, long before I even came into this world.

Another example: One morning, I woke up and walked to the dining room for breakfast when a prisoner ran towards me. If I hadn’t been alert, I might have instinctively reached for my gun (even though I wasn’t holding one) and shot him out of anger for his carelessness, which I felt had harmed me.

It really hurt me when I judged the mistakes of others. We hurt ourselves through negative thoughts, which come from our minds. These thoughts fuel a sense of superiority, leading to more bad ideas—and maybe even bad deeds— if we believe that our sense of superiority gives us the right to punish those who wrong us, even in small ways. In the end, we become both judge, jurors and executioners.

We fail to recognize our delusional minds and the illusions that govern us. Perhaps these illusions are driven by craving, attachment to views, self—clinging and prejudice. We may not even realize whether we are feeding these illusions. We’ve allowed anger, selfishness, ignorance, and craving to dominate us, overshadowing our true mind or Buddha nature. We have become slaves to these forces. I often reflect on myself and contemplate, understanding that I am at the root of the problem. The Buddha’s five precepts serve as nourishment to quench this thirst and transform the negative, delusional mind.

Nathaniel

4.6.    Benefits Of Meditation

Many prisoners have committed crimes that I never expected. On the outside, many of them were intellectual, gentle, and polite individuals. However, in the past, due to delusion, they committed crimes and became dangerous criminals. I must overcome my fear of their actions and try to see them as ordinary people. When they write letters, the stories and thoughts they share deeply concern me. For instance, there was a solitary prisoner who wrote about his isolation after his family cut off contact. This is the pain that many unfortunate prisoners face, a constant sorrow visible on their faces day and night. When they seek refuge in the Three Jewels, it offers them the opportunity to experience the miracles of the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha, providing them with a stable spiritual refuge (because people need something to rely on and the Triple Gem is the strongest support for them). Over time, they learn to meditate, listen to the Dharma, chant sutras, and participate in repentance ceremonies, bringing them greater peace.

The daily effort required to practice meditation has led to noticeable transformations in the prisoners, helping them master their minds. This is truly commendable. They shared with me how they were in the past and how now, they approach their practice with open minds, willing to look deeply within themselves. They recognize that Buddhist meditation provides them with a meaningful refuge to return to.

There are many meditation techniques, each with its own benefits. The method we typically teach involves meditating for about thirty minutes, focusing on the breath. Then, we practice contemplating the movements of the body and mind in accordance with the Four Foundations of Mindfulness (satipatthana), observing these sensations without reacting, simply watching them mindfully (vipassana) as they arise and fade away.

By focusing on these fleeting thoughts and sensations, scattered distractions and delusional thoughts gradually fade. Once the mind has calmed, those who wish can recite the Buddha’s name or allow the mind to remain still, observing thoughts as they come and go like guests, while the true master—the Buddha nature—remains (following the Bodhidharma Zen Method). This practice continues for about thirty minutes. Meditating for an hour at a time is deeply transformative and purifies the mind. It requires consistent effort to develop mindfulness, self—control, and mental balance.

In general, meditation is a method of focusing the mind to eliminate bad habits. It is a realistic method for increasing awareness, insight, and compassion for prisoners. Meditation serves as a way of life, helping individuals to train both body and mind while cultivating morality.

How does Buddhist meditation differ from the art of relaxation and stress reduction? While stress relief can be a by—product of meditation, chanting or reciting the Buddha’s name, typical stress—reduction exercises do not address the root cause of deep stress (dukkha— samudaya, the cause of suffering). In contrast, Buddhist meditation aims to transform craving, hatred, ignorance, and disturbing emotions that poison both the individual and society. In this sense, meditation acts as a form of mental detox, offering a remedy for the mind. Although this process is challenging, it helps practitioners, especially inmates, achieve a more balanced and healthier state of mind.

John, a prisoner at the Kettle Moraine Correctional Institution in Plymouth, Wisconsin, shared that one day, while sitting on a soft mat in his cell, he focused on monitoring his breath. His body and mind were at ease. Despite the usual noise and shouting from the other inmates, he suddenly realized that his mind was no longer agitated or irritated. He was fully aware of the chaos around him, but his mind remained calm and unaffected. Instead of reacting to the situation or trying to escape those thoughts, he felt a deep sense of peace, resting in a state of unmoving awareness of the present moment. He experienced true tranquility, even in such a turbulent environment. This moment made him realize that with consistent practice of silence and mindfulness, he could endure everything on his journey of imprisonment.

Thank you for the dedication of associations, groups, and individuals in volunteering to guide the Buddha’s teachings and meditation in these prisons. Thank you also to the chaplains for creating the favorable conditions for these helpful meditation sessions.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

 

4.7.    Results Of The Retreat

Dear Sư cô,

After years of mind training through daily meditation sessions and “the diligent recluse retreats” in prison, my experience of suffering and darkness has changed dramatically. When I was in a state of suffering and despair, covered with the darkness of ignorance and agony, at that time, my experience of practicing meditation helped me to directly observe the events without triggering other ideas about them. When this happened, I felt the awakening of a vast expanse of space, enveloping suffering. Then the pain slowly dissolved into space, leaving me in a state of bliss. This was an unusual and immature experience when it first appeared, but this time I accepted and realized that the results of meditation have really transformed my suffering and despair.

Experience letting go, look straight, and feel pain as honestly as it is. Then, feeling the suffering melt into the vast space a state of bliss surges. This is a priceless gift. It gives me a sense of confidence in my life, my spiritual path, my meditative practice, and my ability to transform, no matter how frightening or painful it is.

The experience of transformation arises from my practice of meditation while facing the overwhelming suffering and despair of long—term imprisonment, offering a profound sense of natural bliss that didn’t depend on any physical circumstances. In truth, there is nothing enjoyable about being in prison, and there are no joyful moments in daily life. On the contrary, my life felt like a complete failure in every aspect. Yet, in the depths of that despair, I discovered a miraculous sense of bliss, unaffected by my surroundings. This experience gave me a strong belief in holiness and deep confidence in my mind. The direct transformation of suffering and despair into peace is one of the key reasons I have come to deeply trust in the power of meditation, which can transform our prison from within.

Diego

 

4.8.                            The Ultimate Story Of Meditation

Anthony Baez recounts that deep within the forest, Zen Master Uriah was entering a state of profound concentration when he was suddenly interrupted by his attendant, Lugon. “Master, Master!” Lugon called out. Zen Master Uriah opened his eyes and saw Lugon running toward him. “What is it, Lugon?” he asked.

Lugon, breathless, replied, “Master, please come quickly!”

“Where are we going?” Uriah asked.

“You must come to the waterfall,” Lugon urged. “Yin

is causing trouble again.”

“Why must I go there? What is Yin doing?”

“Yin has taken your three new disciples hostage. He has them at the waterfall and is threatening to kill them. He told me to bring you to him. Please hurry!”

“Alright, let’s go now. Lead the way!”

Zen Master Uriah and Lugon hurried through the forest to the waterfall. When they arrived, Uriah saw his three disciples, tied by the neck, standing precariously near the edge, about thirty meters above the ground. Uriah looked at them with a compassionate gaze as Yin appeared from behind them.

Yin sneered, “Uriah! So, you’ve finally shown up.”

Uriah asked, “Why are you using my disciples to torment me?”

Yin continued, “I know how much you care for your

disciples. After all, I was once one of them.”

Uriah demanded, “Yin, what do you want?”

“ I want to torture you, that’s what I want. Now shut your mouth and listen to me. I will let your disciples live if they answer my question correctly. Otherwise I will drag them down the cliff. I hope they can remember what you taught them about the ultimate meditation, as their lives depend on it. I’ll give you a small glimmer of hope. You may assist the disciples with my questions, but they must remain silent and you can only use gestures. If you dare to do a second move, I will let them die.”

Uriah gazed at his disciples, standing at the edge of the thirty—meter—high waterfall, awaiting their fate. Yin called out, “Let’s begin!”

He grabbed the first disciple by the neck and shouted, “Answer me!” The disciple responded, “Yes.”

Yin continued, “Is your neck like a rope, or something else? Answer correctly, and you live. Answer wrong, and you die!”

The disciple looked at his Zen master Uriah. Uriah placed his right hand up to the level of his heart to give a sign. The disciple saw and tried to find the meaning. “What does it mean, what does it mean? He fumbled in his mind. What does the hand placed on the heart mean? Maybe it is the mind, the mind, the mind.”

Yin shouted, “Oh, I forgot to say, the time to answer is limited. You have only a minute. Uriah, if you move, your students will know the laws of gravity. I will throw them off the cliff.”

The disciple glanced at his teacher, and Uriah kept his hand over his heart. “What does that mean? What does it mean?” the disciple thought to himself, repeating in his mind, “The mind, the mind, the Heart Sutra.”

Yin shouted again, “You have thirty seconds.”

The disciple continued to think, “What does the Heart Sutra explain? This body itself is emptiness, and emptiness itself is this body. The body is not separate from emptiness, and emptiness is not separate from the body. The same applies to feelings, perceptions, mental formations, and consciousness. If our body and all phenomena are the same, that means I and the neck strap are one.”

Yin shouted again, “Fifteen seconds left!”

The disciple turned to Yin and responded quickly,

“That’s right, the neck strap and I are one.”

“Impressive, you are absolutely right. You live,” Yin declared.

Uriah breathed a sigh of relief upon hearing Yin’s words, “You live.”

Yin called out, “Next, it’s the second disciple’s turn.” He posed the same question: “Are you the same as the rope or different? If you say you’re the same, I’ll throw you off the cliff. If you say you’re different, I’ll throw myself off. Now, answer. Your one minute begins.”

The second disciple looked at his master, searching for a hint. Master Uriah sat down in a lotus position, appearing to enter a deep meditative state. The disciple began to think, “Why is our master sitting like this, as if he’s entering meditation? What is meditation? Hurry, think quickly ... Oh! We can’t overthink it. We must go beyond thought, ahead of thought. The true emptiness before thought ... but how do I answer this question in true emptiness, without thinking?”

Yin shouted, “You have only twenty seconds left!”

“The true emptiness ... true emptiness ... who are we? No thoughts... The true emptiness is just that—true emptiness, but nothing at all is true emptiness.” The disciple stretched out his arms and patted them together.

Yin nodded, “You answered correctly. You will live.”

Uriah looked up and let out a relieved breath.

Yin called out, “Now, it’s the third disciple’s turn. What is Zen?” The disciple looked at his teacher, waiting for a hint. Master Uriah quickly struck the head of the attendant, Lugon. The attendant cried out, “Whoa! What are you doing, Master?”

The disciple observed his master’s action and began to grasp the hint: “Oh, what does that mean? Quickly, quickly, the idea must come!”

Yin smirked. “I’m curious about this one. Hey, third disciple, you’re the unlucky one. You have only ten seconds to answer.”

The disciple whispered to himself, “Please, realize it. Please, the idea must come. How to answer? What is meditation, what is meditation?”

Yin called out again, “Five seconds left!” “Enlightenment, come to me! Come out!” The disciple

looked at Yin and declared, “Fire is fire, water is water!”

Yin was taken aback but nodded. “You answered correctly. You will live.”

Master Uriah exhaled gently and smiled at his final disciple.

Yin then announced, “The three of you now understand and realize the three ultimate types of Zen: Theoretical Zen, Tathagata Zen, and Ancestor Zen. You are free to live peacefully and continue your path to enlightenment. Master Uriah, I apologize for disturbing you in testing your disciples’ awakened abilities. I’ll be going now, but I will return soon.”

With that, Yin stepped back and vanished before their eyes.

Anthony Baez

4.9.    Fear

Anthony Baez recounted a story in which, while walking through a forest in Japan, Zen master Uriah and his disciple Fhi came across a rope bridge that spanned a deep valley.

“Fhi! Wait a moment,” called Uriah. “Yes, master?” Fhi responded.

“I forgot the water pitcher,” said Uriah.

“Teacher! I’ll go get it for you,” Fhi offered.

“No, you can go on to the temple. It’s fine, I’ll get it myself,” Uriah insisted.

“Are you sure, master? It’s no trouble for me to go get it,” Fhi asked.

“Keep going, I’ll meet you at the temple,” Uriah said.

With that, Zen master Uriah turned back into the forest, scanning ahead for the spot where he and his disciple had just meditated. Meanwhile, Fhi continued on his way to the temple, crossing the rope bridge that spanned the cliff.

“Hahaha hahahaha ... ” Fhi suddenly heard a series of laughs echoing through the air. He paused in the middle of the bridge and looked around, bewildered, and spotted an elderly monk named Yin, dressed in a black kimono with a red belt.

Yin called out, “Where is your pitiful teacher, little student?”

“Yin! Why are you bothering me?” Fhi asked, frustrated.

“Are you upset that I’m bothering you?” Yin taunted. “No, I’m not,” Fhi replied.

“Well, you just opened your mouth to justify yourself,”

Yin said with a grin.

“Yin, what do you want?” Fhi asked, growing more impatient.

“Young student! I know for certain that your teacher has spoken about my teaching methods,” Yin began.

“Yes, my teacher did mention you, and my three

younger brothers were tested by you,” Fhi replied.

“Your master and students must have discussed my appearance, which is why you called me by that amusing name. I’ve met you before, little student,” Yin said, with a knowing smile.

“Whether we’ve met before or not doesn’t matter. As I said earlier, what do you want?” Fhi retorted.

“Hahahaha... I can see it in your eyes. You’re not afraid of me,” Yin said with a grin.

“Really? Is that so?” Fhi responded, but before he could finish, the ropes of the bridge suddenly transformed into snakes, and a gust of wind began to blow fiercely, making the bridge sway dangerously. Fhi lost his balance and quickly grabbed onto the ropes, but the slippery snakes slipped through his fingers. He fell, scrambling to catch the wooden slats below. His heart pounded in his chest as fear gripped him. Yin’s laughter echoed in the air.

“Yin!” a cold voice cried out from the other end of the bridge.

“Ah, Zen master Uriah! You’ve come to witness me testing your student,” Yin called out mockingly.

“Yin, please release him!” Uriah shouted; his voice filled with urgency.

“Uriah, you know you must obey my terms if you want

to save your student,” Yin said with a smirk.

“What is your condition?” Uriah asked.

“Surely you haven’t forgotten? This isn’t the first time I’ve tested your disciple,” Yin replied.

“Yin, I know you love playing these ‘mind games,’

and you never fail to amaze me,” Uriah responded.

“Uriah, you’ve always known exactly what I’m doing. But there’s only one way to save your cowardly student: you must give him a hint, but it must be in the form of a gesture, not words. Your student has only two minutes to answer. Let’s begin.”

Uriah looked at his disciple, who was clinging to the swaying board beneath the bridge. Fhi still had his eyes closed, deep in thought about what to do. He finally opened his eyes and looked up, silently pleading for his teacher’s help. Uriah gazed into Fhi’s eyes, seeing the fear swelling in his heart.

Uriah took the water jug, lifted it high, and stared at it with one wide—open eye before peering inside. Fhi, watching his master’s actions, began to sense a hint. But what could it mean?

Yin’s voice echoed, “One and a half minutes left.”

A stronger wind blew, causing the bridge to shake more violently. Fhi gripped the wooden beam even tighter as the snakes hissed, slithering toward him.

“Damn, what do I do now?” Fhi thought in desperation. The sound of cracking wood reverberated through the air, followed by the horrifying rumble of the wooden planks breaking apart, like an earthquake splitting the ground beneath him.

“This is impossible, I can’t die like this,” Fhi thought, his heart pounding.

Fhi looked up and saw his teacher still staring into the water pitcher. What does this mean? Why does my teacher keep looking at the jug? There’s nothing in it.

Yin’s voice echoed, “Forty—five seconds left. Young

student, free yourself, or prepare to fall into the abyss.”

Wait a minute, let it come to me! Fhi thought. There’s nothing in the water jug—it’s empty. The true emptiness! Keep the mind empty. True emptiness exists before fear. I’ve created this fear in my heart. Why should I be afraid of the snakes?

As Fhi relaxed his grip on the board to avoid the snakes, the board snapped in half. The bridge tilted to the left at a 45—degree angle, bringing him dangerously close to the snakes. Fhi quickly grabbed another piece of wood, which also cracked under his weight.

I have to calm down. My mind is creating all of these scenes. I need to let go of my thoughts, and then everything will become peaceful.

“Only twenty seconds left!” Yin called out.

Fhi closed his eyes and entered a meditative state. He breathed in the true emptiness and exhaled with a “pure mind.” He let go of all thoughts, returning to a state before discrimination. In that moment, he reached true emptiness.

When he opened his eyes, the snakes had transformed back into ropes, and the cracks in the wooden boards had vanished. Fhi stood up again, steady, and calm.

Looking directly at Yin, Fhi said, “Yin, it’s done. I’ve overcome the challenge. Fear arises from discrimination, but in true emptiness, there is no discrimination. Therefore, I am no longer afraid of the dangers you created in my mind.”

“Well, my young student, I understand now. Practice diligently, and you will realize your true nature. Continue practicing, and you will enlighten all things.”

With that, Yin vanished before Fhi and Zen master

Uriah’s eyes.

Dear Sư cô Giới Hương, returning to the issue at hand, I refuse to let the situation or environment control me any longer. No more excuses. I was the one who foolishly created this circumstance, and I allowed it to persist. I let hurt, jealousy, anger, loneliness, insecurity, and negativity dominate me. But now, I will destroy it at all costs. The circumstances no longer hold power over me. I will not accept defeat, whether it comes from my mind or the passage of time. Inner peace is within my reach—true emptiness. My vision is clear now. Fear, guilt, doubt, and shame have no place within me.

Anthony Baez

4.10.    Having A Religion In Life

I was introduced to Buddhism in the summer of 2007 by a Buddhist prisoner. The more I read and listened, the more I pondered the teachings of Buddhism. I purchased more books and Buddhist scriptures, explored meditation, and eventually found my peace. Meditation became my focus and I often reflected: from everything I’ve heard and read, meditation seems to be the most challenging aspect of Buddhism to fully grasp. The deeper I delved into Buddhism, the more I understood Zen.

I look forward to meeting Venerable Giới Hương and the Buddhists at the Milwaukee Zen Center when I have the opportunity, eager to receive answers to my questions. How wonderful it is to finally have a spiritual path in my life!

When a Zen master was asked what meditation is, he simply replied, “My daily thoughts.” Isn’t it that simple and straightforward? Zen is about emptiness, transcending sectarian boundaries. Whether a Christian or a Buddhist, anyone can meditate, just like how both large and small fish, along with all the sea creatures, live in the same ocean. Meditation is the sea, the air, the mountain, the thunder, the warmth of summer, the snow of winter. Most of all, meditation is the person.

Sōsaku, May 2008

Casey Rogers

 Sister Tonen said: “Experiencing your own reality, for the first time unimpeded by speech, thought, concept, definition, classification, prejudice, or delusions that paralyze your mind. And now, for the first time, you ate a delicious and wonderful red apple. That is meditation!”

Ven. Tonen Sara O’Connor (left) and Sư cô Giới Hương (right) at the gate of Racine Correctional Institution, Wisconsin

                                                             *********

Chapter 5

THE PRISON WORLD

A

pproximately half of the 2.3 million prisoners in the US are African American, despite African Americans making up only 13 percent of the national population. During my time guiding in Wisconsin prisons, I noticed that sometimes more than half of the study group consisted of Black Americans, though this varied. The majority of prisoners were White Americans, with some Asian prisoners from countries like Laos, Mongolia, India, and Vietnam. This is likely because these groups may have closer ties to Buddhism, while many Black Americans follow Islam or Christianity. Many prisons have a shared chapel for all religious groups, but prisoners who follow religions such as Islam or Christianity often have their

own chapels where they can set up their own altars.

Our approach to guiding people in Buddhism is not to pressure anyone into taking refuge in the Triple Gem. Prisoners can learn about Buddhism and practice it if they choose. They are free to explore their own hearts, and there is no requirement for them to become disciples or identify as Buddhists in order to receive guidance. Sometimes, Black American prisoners come to learn Buddhism, but the next time they might not. They may have turned to another religion, been transferred to a different facility, or been released. We only know their decisions if they inform us through a letter or if a friend lets us know. Regardless of the number of prisoners or their ethnicity, whether Buddhist or not, we continue to offer guidance. We are happy to serve when the chaplain requests our assistance on behalf of the inmates and invites us to come.

On the morning of October 16, 2007, I visited and preached to prisoners at Dodge Correctional Institution in Dodge, Wisconsin. The facility houses 1,600 inmates, several of whom are Vietnamese. Mr. Nam shared with me that he was convicted of stealing checks and selling stolen cars. Inmates in Wisconsin are typically sent to this camp first, where they await their court hearings. After their cases are decided, they are transferred to other facilities based on the severity of their crimes. As a result, the group of prisoners learning meditation here is always changing. Some may be here one month, but by the next month, they could have been transferred. When we visit other camps to teach meditation, we may encounter them again. The world is small, and it’s always a joy to reconnect.

At Dodge Correctional Institution, I met Daniel Kevin whose Buddhist name is Tosetsu. He was a professor at the University of Wisconsin, Madison. Tosetsu wrote and gave me some ideas about how to support family members in prison. Tosetsu said that when a relative or friend is incarcerated, it’s important to continue maintaining a connection with them. One of the most distressing and painful experiences for newly admitted prisoners is the sense of helplessness and isolation when they have no family or friends to rely on. We should make an effort to write letters regularly, sharing news of daily life, and aim to visit at least once a month. It is crucial for prisoners to see their loved ones, as it helps maintain strong family bonds and keeps them connected to home. Encourage prisoners to strive for positive actions that may improve their chances of early release. They should live with purpose and avoid succumbing to low self—esteem. Just like in society, the environment within correctional facilities can either offer opportunities for success or lead to failure.

Work in a unified way to support prisoners. Do not create conflicts with people who are trying to support the prisoners. Use this time to unite as family or as a community. This will ensure a healthy integration for prisoners back into the community of friends and family. Practice love and unconditional acceptance. Avoid criticism of prisoners.

We should send books, letters and encourage inmates to focus on their transformation, forgiveness, compassion, and love for themselves and other prisoners. The goal is to make prisoners feel confident, not to make them feel guilty as victims. This is also a great way for us to help prisoners maintain their mental well—being.

                                         ***

October 22, 2007

Venerable Tonen and I had a Dharma Talk at Green

Bay Correctional Institution. This is a maximum— security prison with closely guarded, thick multilayered doors (each time opening and closing it makes the sound ket ket ket because of its heaviness). Police monitor each room, and the living area is equipped with a tape recorder and surveillance cameras in the corners. There are lockers where visitors can store their bags and personal belongings before entering the prison.

Although in the United States, I still follow the habit of using the conical hat on head and wearing wooden clogs (Vietnamese culture) even when driving a car or visiting jail, except in winter when I wear boots to avoid snow slipping. The leaf hat is kept outside the prison but the wooden clogs are required to be worn. Passing the bomb control machines, they began squeaking and screaming and the police asked me if I had hidden any metal in my body. I quickly removed my watch. Going through, the machine still squeaked and the police did not let me in. Finally they discovered that the nails in the wooden clogs are metal. The police picked up my old wooden clogs like a strange object that they had never seen before, looked closely at the sole, tried to ask something but stopped and then they had to move the clogs around to the bomb tester so I could wear them inside again. I was worried (probably I must go barefoot to visit the prison). Venerable Tonen looked at me with a reassuring smile. But in the end they let me go and warned me not to have the wooden clogs next time. Since then, I have to wear sandals whenever visiting prison.

Our hands are typically stamped with white ink (which doesn’t show any markings), but sometimes they are stamped with red ink, though it washes off easily. With these stamps, we can proceed to the second, third, or fourth door. As we approach a door with a security scanner, we raise our hand, and the machine detects the stamp. The scanner then flashes red, and the doors automatically open, allowing us to enter.

Here is our timetable: In the morning, we preach to the prison collectives at the chapel The afternoon is for private meetings. Because we come as chaplains, we filled out a “pastoral” form. The application must be accepted for a personal private visit. For those visiting relatives, fill out the “visitor” form. Many types of applications for many cases.

Sitting in the living room, I’m talking to Tojin but I discreetly look around. I see visitors of all races and ages. The visitors were mostly women, wives, mothers, sisters, and brothers of prisoners. There are also teenagers with babies in their arms. I think about their lives. What is the influence on a child when visiting a father or brother? How much do they understand this situation? How are children affected by the harsh surroundings, reinforced barbed wire, and strictly controlled places? The children looked around aimlessly and there was nothing for them to play with.

A country with the highest number of prisoners in the world—will this Saturday afternoon be the same as in other prisons in the United States? A sad Saturday afternoon it is! The criminal has affected his family. What kind of citizen will the child who waits in the prison grow up to be? While these children wait to see their father in prison, other children around the world enjoy hours spent with their parents in the park, reading, and eating out.

Many elderly men and women, some in their eighties or nineties, rely on walking canes to visit the prison. Often, the prisoner is a son or grandchild, perhaps in their fifties or sixties. It must be deeply painful for these parents and grandparents to see their loved ones dressed in prison uniforms. Parents always see their children as “the child of an eighty—year—old mother, even when they are a hundred.” How can they reconcile the innocent image of their child’s childhood with the reality of seeing them as a prisoner today?

When I first arrived in the United States and watched the news on television, I saw images of American prisons, particularly in Wisconsin. I thought that from certain perspectives, American prisons might offer better accommodations compared to those in developing countries like Vietnam, India, Cambodia, and others. This is indeed true. US prisons feature basketball courts, both indoor and outdoor, baseball fields, handball courts, sports equipment, musical instruments, games, forty—five cable TV channels, libraries with thousands of books and dormitory rooms (though without private TVs). Prisons also have stores where inmates can purchase thirteen— inch TVs, cassette players, CD players, typewriters, small radios, games, food, coffee, cigarettes, cards, writing paper, clothing, and sandals. These recreational and personal items are provided to help prisoners relax and meet their everyday needs.

The study and re—educations programs are extensive, supported by numerous social funds. Prisoners have the opportunity to pursue college courses through distance learning. There are various programs available in prison, with some teachers even coming in to offer high school— level classes. Additionally, there are voluntary programs and mandatory classes, which inmates are encouraged to attend in hopes of securing early release. These include courses on religion, “Thinking for a Change, Anger Management, Roadblocks to Recovery, Self—Esteem,” and “Cage of Rage,” all aimed at helping prisoners manage their emotions. As a result, the prison is often referred to as a re—education camp.

There are numerous detoxification programs available, but the prison also houses individuals convicted of violent offenses, sex crimes, fraud, theft, slander, perjury, and other criminal activities. As a result, the programs offered are more general in nature.

W.P., in the article, “Views on Reforming the Prison System”¹⁸ recommends the curriculum in prison world to give prisoners the means to change their lives. It sounds good, but I’m afraid it’s just a dream that’s hard to realize.

“Have a major university design, build, and operate a state prison. Get the federal government (or a private foundation) to pay for the construction and the first two years’ operating expenses. After two years all operating expenses will be covered by the university except for medical expenses and the salaries of prison guards, who will be the only state employees inside the prison and therefore will be paid by the state.

“The prison will be staffed by university employees, even the parole officers. All policies will be created

18. “Views on Reforming the Prison System” by P. http://www.

thubtenchodron.org/PrisonDharma/the_system.html

by a board made of university professors. Also, each department within the prison shall be under the supervision of the senior professor in that respective area (finance department run by the professor of finance, food service run by professor of food service, etc.).

“Further, a prison industry would be implemented by the university to pay all operating costs of the prison after the initial two years. This can be easily accomplished by requiring that each offender work 30 hours a week starting at $0.50 an hour and working their way up to $1.00 an hour. This gets the offenders in the habit of working a regular job, which is a major requirement in today’s society. It allows offenders to make money ($100 a month) to buy food and other things from the prison commissary store. It also allows the university to operate without outside funding or interference, because the prison will be self— sustaining.

“The prison will have an intensive rehabilitation program set up in step—down stages such as:

8. Prison Adjustment
9. Stress/Anger Solutions
10. Specific Area of Offense(s)
11. Violence
12. Drugs
13. Crime Impact on Victims
14. Job Skills
15. Re—entering Society

“Each offender would be required to attend a program(s)

for a certain amount of time each day (for example, two hours a day, five days a week) until they are released.

“Also, counselors, program instructors and parole officers will all play a major role in the parole hearing process. This will help give a complete picture of the offender’s progress towards rehabilitation, which will be a tremendous help in deciding whether an offender is ready for release or not. Currently parole officers make parole decisions based upon a set of guidelines. They don’t even meet the offender until a few weeks before his parole hearing, and then there’s just a 30—minute interview.

“This system will work for several reasons. First, it would be self—sustaining, not needing outside funding. In fact it would actually make a large profit. For example, take a business with 50 employees in which you paid each of them $10 an hour and they worked 40 hours a week year—round. Their combined salaries would come to $1,040,000 each year. Now imagine having 1000 employees in which you paid each of them $100 dollars a month working 30 hours year—round. Their salaries would come to $1,200,000. That’s having 1,000 employees working for you for a little over the cost you would pay 50 workers (you would have a tremendous profit margin). Getting offenders to work 30 hours a week for $100 a month will not be an issue. Most offenders currently work 30 hours a week and get paid $8.50 a month. They would be happy to be able to work and earn money to buy extra food, cosmetics, writing supplies, stamps and other things which make their incarceration more bearable.

“Second, with competent counselors and psychologists available to guide offenders, along with the intensive rehabilitation programs, offenders will have the tools needed for them to change their lifestyle. It will be easy to screen out the offenders who aren’t making a sincere effort. These offenders can be transferred to the mainstream prisons to make room for the other offenders who are committed to rehabilitation. Policies could be made which only allow offenders who fit certain criteria to be admitted such as fifteen—year—sentence or less, first time offender, recommendations from another prison, etc.

“Third, the university will be able to benefit by:

Offering specialized degrees in both corrections and

rehabilitation;

It will allow the university to give the students hands—

on training in a number of different fields;

Many scientific studies could be done within the prison

because it is a controlled environment;

University enrollment will increase due to the university’s increase in popularity resulting from documentaries and articles about the prison and the university;

The university’s assets will increase from the prison industry; and

Soon other universities will create their own prison rehabilitation program.

“After five to ten years of case studies and testing inside these university prisons, new standards could be set and required for all mainstream state prisons.

“We need to give offenders a fighting chance. If your son or daughter was troubled or was doing things that harmed themselves or others, you would immediately help them. And if their problem became worse, you would give them even more help. You wouldn’t lock them in a room that was full of recreation equipment and a television for years hoping they would get better, because you know that their problem doesn’t stem from the outside world, but from their own state of mind. Isolating them from their loved ones and the healthy things in their lives without providing a remedy for their attitudes doesn’t help them; it only makes their condition worse. They become more uncaring and alienated.

“So please give your son, daughter, wife, husband, uncle, aunt, cousin, neighbor, and fellow human being what they need. Help!”

5.1.    Impermanent

Dear Michael,

The Buddhataughtthatall phenomena areimpermanent, changing from one state to another, from one thought to another. Clinging to delusions of permanency will create suffering for your life. Each day involves a constant flow of thoughts, rising and falling, moving through the cycles of samsara without end.

We try to turn the impermanent adversities in the prison world into pure land. Prison is the “pure land.” Yes, because the mind is pure, it is always pure. In the Surangama Sutra, the Buddha taught, “The peace in the world is peaceful.”

Therefore, one of the best ways to endure or overcome adversity is to see its impermanence. We can awaken to whatever scenes we face, how much suffering we experience, and realize that everything fades, even death. We must learn to smile in the face of life’s ups and downs, knowing that all things arise and pass away. Most importantly, we should not grasp or hold onto them. After all, why would we want to hold onto what sets us apart, or worse, attach ourselves to it?

Look at all things as simple and gentle. We often think that the problem is too big to bear, so it’s solved by verbal or physical war. Now, observe the daily ups and downs, see the delusions, and separate yourself from the problem—letting go.

Michael tries to contemplate the adversity of life that is nothing more than the arising and disappearance of the impermanent dharmas that create your realm. You try to stay calm and avoid being dominated by the daily upheaval of the prison world. One of the most effective means that we or the instructors should focus on is the three words of the chant, Amitabha Buddha, “Namo Amitabha Buddha.” Please take the beads I offered you to recite the Buddha’s title every night and in every meditative session. You should reflect on the impermanence of life.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

5.2.    Various Ranks Of Prisoners

Dear Sư cô,

Today, I would like to share with you about the various kinds of prisons. There are many classes in the society; it is the same in the correctional institutions; there are also many classes of people and many ideas.

The first rank consists of prisoners who are intentionally guilty, filled with remorse, and are no longer able to take any action.

These individuals, even after being in prison, continue to commit crimes and plan to do so once they are released from prison. They remain determined to commit crimes again when they regain their freedom.

The second rank: They may want to live an honest life, but once they are released from jail, they end up committing crimes again.

The third rank: In prison, they are very focused on self—improvement, but released, they fall back into their old habits and violations.

The last rank: They are very regretful, have really transformed, and once released from prison, they live an honest life.

Many inmates continue to commit crimes in prison due to their aggressive nature or pride in their past gang accomplishments. They want the respect of other prisoners and feel they appear weak by showing regret or reforming. When released, this group is quick to commit crimes again, engaging in illegal activities to make money and satisfy their desires.

Prison represents a direct contrast to what society thinks is right. For example, you may be responsible in society for your activities and if you violate the law or morals, you will be punished. However, in prison, engaging in wrongdoing can lead to recognition and status among gang members. For instance, if a prisoner commits an assault, fellow inmates may admire him as a hero, elevating him to a position of respect within their criminal world.

When a large group of prisoners live together in a dormitory, many lose their sense of humanity, becoming like fierce beasts. Some engage in morally corrupt behavior, live among the lowest of the low, yet they are still regarded as “upright heroes” by other prisoners for committing what are considered serious crimes.

If a prisoner commits a sex crime, they may be seen as part of the “hero” class among their peers. They elevate themselves through acts of violence, hurting those who mistreat them in order to instill fear in others. Once this fear takes root in prison, it becomes difficult to overcome.

There is an implicit rule among the prisoners that “you must not tell the guard about anything that makes you and me both brought to trial. You must deal directly with the person who injured you or took your stuff. You have to be honest and not lie to your friends in the group, but with others, it’s acceptable to lie even if it means sacrificing yourself, as long as you remain loyal to the gang.”

The irony is that while prisoners create their own laws and swear to live and die by them, few actually follow through. There are harsh labels in prison, however, no matter how they are labeled or how much their actions are condemned, they remain human. To the outside world, the prison system often seems to degrade the prisoners, suggesting that their crimes make them undeserving of pity or compassion. Yet the truth is different. Many prisoners deeply regret their past actions, take responsibility for their crimes, and genuinely desire redemption. They dream of a better future and hope to live normal lives. Inside the prison walls, there are still many good people.

Tojin

5.3.    The Prison’s Culture

There are a few interesting things about prison life and culture. Many prisoners crave respect and seek to build up their pride. This is something I really hate. They desire respect, but no one will truly give it to them. When they fail to achieve this respect, driven by an unrealistic longing for admiration, they become trapped in a never—ending cycle of frustration and madness.

Matthew

5.4.    Rise Up

Nelson Mandela wrote: “You can contemplate in prison, an ideal place to know people. Be aware of your mental processes and sense of reality. The external factors such as social position, population influence, health, and education standards are also important, but the internal spiritual factors may be the more important and essential factor in the development process of humans. Observe the virtues: honesty, sincerity, simplicity, humility, tranquility, generosity, absence of vanity, willingness to serve other prisoners, and a selfless contribution to making you valuable.

“After all, we can see, prisons are a place for us to have many diverse opportunities to look back on our actions every day, to overcome the bad and develop the so— called good in you. Practice meditation regularly, at least twenty minutes a day will reap fruit. You will find the first difficulties to overcome are the negative elements in your life but keep on striving to the tenth step and you will reap the results. Remember that the saint is also an ordinary person or a sinner but knows how to strive to be holy.”

Nelson Mandela

 5.5.    Little Squirrel

Dear Sư cô,

Sometimes, in the prison garden, small squirrels would run into the cells, if the window net was torn enough for them to get through, in search of leftover bread. The appearance of those squirrels brought a bit of joy to the day. I understand that animals are considered less valuable than humans, but at times, they seem to connect more with people than humans do with one another, especially when it comes to prisoners.

The Buddha taught that the Buddha nature is the same in both humans and animals. I see the squirrel as my friend, and its presence brought a smile to my face. It didn’t provoke my ego or make me angry. However, in conversations with prisoners, even brief ones, disagreements often arise. This reflects a self—centered perspective, as Venerable Giới Hương often taught.

Alexander Buczko Drug Abuse Correctional Center Winnebago, Wisconsin

5.6.    Choice And Change

Dear Sư cô,

The reason I was imprisoned was because I was a selfish person who only cared about me. My thoughts and actions were always driven by what made me happy in the moment and fulfilled my desires. Rarely did my actions or words consider others. Now, I realize that this goes against moral values.

As I grew up, I was always fearful of others and highly cautious of my surroundings, which made it difficult for me to trust anyone. When I was betrayed—whether it was my girlfriend leaving me, my mother leaving my stepfather, or my biological father neglecting me—it led me to misunderstand others and distance myself from people. In the end, I blamed others and began to see them as my enemies.

At that time, my mindset aligned with my actions. I had lost the sense of humanity in my heart, which led to my sins and wrongdoings. Out of the forty—two years I’ve lived, the last forty—one were marked by this path, leaving only one year in which I truly understood goodness. This realization comes from my understanding of the factors and conditions that shaped my choices.

What do I want to change? Turn jealousy into compassion. I want to love people and I want to help them to be happy, because the Buddha taught: “All suffering comes from ego and all happiness comes from loving others.”

This is something I have never done in my life— bring lasting happiness to myself—and there are very few things I have done to bring peace to others. I feel deeply frustrated and disappointed in myself.

Last year, I escaped from prison and have been in solitary confinement ever since. Since then, I have tried to open my mind to others, and change my thoughts and interests (such as my focus on sex). Until last week, I was extremely emotional, crying often, feeling deeply ashamed and guilty, and feeling love for my victims, as well as for the friends and family I hurt. I was overwhelmed with disappointment and anger toward myself.

For six months now, I have practiced meditation for sixty to ninety minutes a day. I understand that thoughts and actions only change when I move them in the direction of goodness. It is interesting that I share with others how the change of evil deeds into goodness can happen through the absorption of compassion and wisdom of the Buddha.

Last week, I practiced meditation and peace came to me. I felt hopeful and also had a clear direction. I feel something new in my state, peace flowing into me every time I exhale or breathe in. I feel the peace from me radiating to those around me. This is new to me. I would like to share with you.

Anthony

5.7.    Crazy Story In The New Year

On December 31, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

I want to talk about craziness in the prison. The New Year is coming but the violating commotion in the dungeon continues to be constant. I think the noise, the screams, and banging on the dungeon doors are the congratulations for the coming New Year. In fact, I know just a bunch of crazy people trying to do things they think they should be able to do. It’s hard to control myself while I’m with idiots to avoid being influenced by what they do, even though I know I’m also a part of them.

Tojin 

January 1, 2008

The world is celebrating the New Year. As it arrives, we hope for more opportunities to solve problems and better ourselves. My focus is on meditation and concentration, striving to avoid being controlled in order to achieve enlightenment. Several inmates have told me that I am too sensitive and often misinterpret their intentions. Simply put, their desires are so obvious that it’s easy to guess what they are asking for.

I understand how I perceive the discriminatory mindset. The challenge lies in maintaining awareness in the most basic moments, practicing mindfulness of what arises (Four Foundations of Mindfulness). I find that I experience pleasures that other prisoners do not, and vice versa. It frustrates me that the inmates, unable to tolerate idleness, enjoy watching me and harassing others. I am deeply aware of this opposition and make a genuine effort to maintain my peace amidst the chaos of the prison environment.

Tojin

5.8.    Going Home To Funerals

Dear Sư cô,

Being granted a brief release from prison to attend a funeral is unusual in this maximum—security facility. Typically, prisoners are handcuffed and escorted by two or sometimes four security guards. You are only allowed to attend the funeral service, and must pay for all expenses, including overtime for the guards who accompany you. I once felt deeply ashamed to attend my mother’s funeral, escorted by prison guards. At that time, I was in a higher—security prison. I had been eligible for a transfer to a lower—security facility, but I chose to remain in the maximum—security prison to continue my volunteer work in hospice care, as there was no one else willing to take over my responsibilities.

This time, the prison officials seemed hesitant to allow me to attend my father’s funeral. I am deeply grateful for the compassion shown by the camp administration and everyone involved. I believe this is likely due to the merit of reciting prayers for the deceased, which helped in my case. Normally, I pray for deceased prisoners and for my parents, but I am usually not permitted to go home for such occasions. My situation is rare, and you probably have never heard of anything like it.

I worked in the prison’s hospice, a deeply meaningful and happy job in a situation where prisoners are often not valued or regarded as worthy of love or trust. When one of the prisoners was about to die, I would be with them for two, sometimes three, four, or even five hours, and at the time of their passing, I would stay with them all day whenever I was free from prison duties. This work required both endurance and a deep compassion for those who were dying.

As a guardian, sitting beside the patient lying in bed, their face worn with exhaustion, coughing and weak, I took on the responsibility of caring for them like a nurse or model doctor. When they were still and receptive, I would begin reciting the Buddha’s name and share teachings on impermanence and non—self. In this role, I served as a lay Buddhist (chaplain), offering a heart full of love and compassion.

For five years, my work in the hospice continued to guide me and today, thanks to the merit from that work, I was granted the opportunity to leave the maximum— security prison and return to honor and bless my deceased family members. I am grateful to the guards and the spirits of the inmates who kindly granted me this favor. The soul of my father will find peace in the Buddha’s realm because of the merit I have earned.

William

 5.9.    New Year’s Gifts

 Dear Sư cô,

Brian Kelley is a new member of our practice group. He received a small sum of money from a relative and asked someone to purchase a box of colorful candles for him with it. On January 1, 2009, Brian Kelley went to the prison yard and offered an aromatic candle to each prison cell, whether strange or familiar.

Yesterday at lunchtime, a strange inmate came and expressed thanks to Brian Kelley that “The candle is the only gift I received for this 2009 Happy New Year. Thank you so much.”

Brian Kelley may be one of the poorer inmates, but he understands the importance of compassion and practicing generosity (dana paramita). He shares what little material wealth he has with the prisoners in the neighboring cells. Though it may seem like a small gesture, it brought a big smile and a sense of brightness to both himself and those around him. Through this act of giving, Brian Kelley has discovered great meaning.

May the candlelight of Brian Kelley remain in the dark night of this prison.

John

5.10.    Effect Of The Teaching

January 12, 2009

Dear Sư cô,

The story I’m about to share contrasts good versus bad, state prison versus prison guards, creating pressure on both sides.

Just a few days ago, the guards attempted to separate a prisoner, but the prisoner refused to comply. Normally, when the guards want to separate someone, they instruct the prisoner to place their hand through the hole in the bars so they can handcuff them and lead them away. However, the prisoner didn’t follow the order. Unfortunately, this happened right in front of me, and the situation ended violently. The guards had to wear anti—tear gas masks, riot helmets, and use pepper spray to force the prisoner into submission. As the prisoners panicked and tried to flee from the tear gas, the guards opened the doors for them to run toward the small exit. If they wanted to capture anyone, they would pull them down.

There were only six or seven prisoners involved, but to move them, the guards had to push them together to avoid their waving hands and feet. As a result, the entire prison was affected by tear gas, causing irritation and redness to the eyes. One of the prison officers asked why this happened, and a guard responded that the prisoners didn’t obey the quarantine order, which led to the action. I asked the officer why they hadn’t explained the situation to the prisoners earlier, whether they had listened or not. When I first walked into the prison, I didn’t hear any explanation about what was going on. Suddenly, the guards sprayed tear gas, leaving everyone confused about what had happened. On the other hand, the prisoners were also very stubborn, grouping together to rebel, fighting with the guards, and trying to gain attention, even seeking to be seen as heroes of the gang. In short, I believe that if the guards had clearly explained the situation to the prisoners from the start—emphasizing that disobeying orders was a matter of discipline, not a joke or something to take lightly—it might have prevented this escalation.

Finally, I realized that one thing needed in this matter is the impact of education. I believe that stress in prison could be reduced simply through teaching. However, the problem in prison is that security is always the top priority. I’m not unaware of the situation; I’ve been locked up with some of the most dangerous, cold—blooded prisoners, so I understand. If the prison were willing to allocate a small budget to hire teachers to provide guidance—particularly for young prisoners and others—perhaps security would improve as well.

Dear Sư cô,

I have proposed several ideas for improvement to the guards, but it seems my suggestions fall on deaf ears. Additionally, many prisoners dismiss my opinions, thinking that as a prisoner, I have no real insight. For me, these ideas are radical, and in truth, I’ve often been criticized by other prisoners for what they perceive as me defending the guards. I try to explain that I’m simply doing what’s right, but at times it only made things worse. Some even accused me of betraying their opinions to the guards in an attempt to harm them.

I’ve come to understand, through the teachings of the Buddha, that there are times when my unclear or misguided ideas cause suffering to myself. I’ve realized this truth. My suggestions to other prisoners are not about manifesting my Buddha nature, but rather about encouraging them to use their time in prison more constructively, guiding them toward better behavior based on their own understanding. In prison, even simply looking around can feel like imprisonment.

The prison has strict rules, often due to daily riots and constant brawls, with no real moments of peace. As a Buddhist, rather than strictly adhering to the Buddha’s precepts and guiding others, I initially thought I needed to adapt to survive in prison. I aimed to avoid participating in rebellions and conflicts while helping to clear the chaos. I believe this approach is useful in such a chaotic environment.

Currently, I’m focused on my hobby of knitting and embroidery, which helps calm my mind and keeps me engaged in positive activities. I’m working on a large plaque featuring the words of the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha. Once it’s finished, I plan to sell it to raise money for the Setoid Ancestor Pagoda being built in China.

Tojin

5.11.    Deer

Bo Flack wrote in his story that “When I was younger, I used to hunt and kill animals. I was crazy about this wild hobby. Rabbits, quails, deer, lynx, whatever is running are not life—safe if I see it. I also shot dogs, cats, squirrels, and starlings.

When I was about to grow up, I started to feel these things were wrong. The last time I hunted and killed an animal was twenty—four years ago. This deer that changed my life. I shot the spotted deer about 200 feet away with a

30.06 rifle. It got hurt and ran for about two miles through the bushes and woods on the hill as I chased him. When the deer saw me, it tried to lift itself up to run, but the thigh wound was so deep and so much blood that it could not lift itself. It was exhausted and only a few feet away from me. It looked at me imploringly. Something was earnestly pleading in the depths of its eyes. I stared dumbfoundedly into its eyes. Those eyes changed me forever.

I stood motionless and looked at it. My friend came running and gasped to remind me to shoot it down. I did not shoot and my best friend shot it. I gave that deer to my friend and from there on, I never hunted again and had no interest in hunting anymore. However, nineteen or twenty years ago, a bison came into my garden and tried to ram my dog. I shot it with a .357 pistol. To save my dog, I had to kill another animal.

The intense and heroic emotions of adolescence feel intertwined with the brutal killing of animals, sparking a surge of aggression and a sense of heroism within me.

The teenagers wanted to mature into adulthood, and the symbol of masculinity for a young man like me at the time was shaped by figures such as my father, uncle, friends, and alcoholic relatives. What did they do? Hunting, fishing, riding motorcycles, indulging in alcohol and drugs.

I grew up thinking that hunting and other kinds of hobbies would make me a man. I want to be tough and heroic, to drink all night and hunt women and girls. I thought that achieving these things was proof of my masculinity. Yes, I shot a bird, a single bullet hitting the quail squarely between the eyes. I had to track that bird all day before I finally took the shot.

Oh, more than that—when I was sixteen, I once took a shot that brought down three wild ducks at once. It’s a rare feat, but accomplishing it truly made me feel like a heroic marksman. If there were sixty mallard ducks in front of me, I believed I could shoot them all down. That, too, would mark me as an exceptional gunman. Even shooting small pigeons or other birds gave me a sense of adventure,

fulfilling my primal instincts.

The feeling of hunting is mixed with violence. Just one finger at the trigger with the power to spare animals or kill them. Their lives are decided by me. I am God. That was a misconception in my mind. When you’re an inexperienced young person, driven by a combative mindset and the belief that you’re wise, your ability to accept what is good, right, or noble is severely limited, and you often resist such guidance.

At sixteen, wisdom wasn’t my goal. At that age, I left home and lived alone in a small hut on a hill in Riverside County, California. There, I could hunt freely all day.

Four years later, at twenty—two, something shifted. One day, I decided I wanted to quit hunting. I truly felt the urge to stop, but I didn’t express it or follow through. Instead, I bought a goose shotgun. Looking back twenty— five years, it seems crazy. Now, hunting no longer interests me.

I vividly remember a very sad memory from twenty— seven years ago. A large gray goose, escaping the cold snow of Canada, had flown thousands of miles to reach the warmth of California. But it will never again fall to the trigger of my skilled hand.

When I was fifteen, I often watched geese fly in flocks across the sky, and I would wish that, if I had a gun, I could test my shooting skills. At twenty—five, I frequently saw flocks of ducks, and I remembered how beautiful birds once fell to the ground from my bullets. But by the time I turned thirty—five, I began to wonder why I wanted to destroy such beautiful lives. They were so graceful, soaring in the vast sky, forming intricate shapes—sometimes in a V, or a straight line, or other patterns. They seemed to communicate with each other in ways we could never understand, representing something pure and untamed.

Now, at forty—five, I deeply admire their natural beauty. I raise my face to the sky and pray that they will continue to fly freely forever. If I ever see someone raise a gun to shoot them, I will beg, “Please spare them! Please don’t destroy these innocent, precious creatures!”

Time has transformed me. This is the elevation of my character.

Bo Flack

5.12.    Understand And Love

In Sōsaku, May 2007, Shannon Ross and Brian Locks wrote: “The saddest thing I have encountered in prison (not the experience of being locked in a cell, but something I see and feel every day) is the lack of mutual understanding. The disapproval when one falls or refuses to try to understand others is heartbreaking. It’s truly pathetic when we act like people who despise each other, judging other prisoners and seeking faults in one another. Stronger individuals use their power to bully the weak, leaving them powerless, unsuccessful, and incapable. How do these issues end in the prison world? How can Buddhist understanding and compassion be instilled in the hearts of prisoners?”

Brian Locks

5.13.    Fear Of Overwhelming

January 19, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

Today during the meditation session, I reflected back and forth on my past, asking “Where did I go wrong?” I think I need to be honest and open my heart while writing. It is more comfortable for me. If I let my heart be dominated by the dark clouds, my pen will be inhibited. I will try to be honest.

Where did I go wrong? I am thirty—two years old now. I remember when I was twenty—five years old, I harbored in my heart an indescribable fear and stupidity. I don’t know where the source of this stupidity and fear started, but I knew it was there. When I was six years old and in the first grade, I was bullied by older kids. They took my things, usually my money for lunch and other things. I don’t know what honor is right now, but one thing I realize is that I feel insecure. The school I went to was a block from my house and the other guys were farther away. Maybe this makes me feel unsafe even in the backyard garden. These fears were piling up in my heart until one day I had to commit a crime in jail. There have been many times when I was in school at the age of six to twelve every day being threatened and bullied by friends who were bigger than me. Now I recall that my mind was oppressed by constant threats from older guys for so long that it ultimately led me down the path of crime. That is my story.

During my childhood, my father struggled with addiction. Although I wasn’t physically punished by him, I often reflected on what led to the mistakes in my life— fear of persecution and long—term suppression that left me constantly on edge. This heightened sense of alertness eventually caused me to lose control.

As for my family, my mom and dad provided for us well, ensuring we had food, clothing, and shelter. My three brothers, my sister and I were well cared for by our mother. Back then, I didn’t appreciate their efforts much, but now I understand and am deeply grateful. I also realized why the older boys who bullied me frightened me so much. They gave me a constant feeling of fear because I felt powerless to do anything about it. Over time, I came to understand that this wasn’t unique to me—it happens everywhere. As I grew older, I learned how to respond in those situations, behaving in harmony with them, not playing their games, and not letting their actions upset me as I did when I was a child.

Late January 19, 2008 (continued)

I allowed fear to reside in my heart for far too long, causing me to become overly cautious in my actions. Due to my friends’ constant threats and stealing money, my dad would yell at me and punish me by making me stay up all night. He even blamed me when things went wrong for him. When I reflect on my sins, how can I not think about Lucian, the son of the victim I shot, threatening me? Like if I don’t help his kill his stepfather, will he harm my family? As time went on, fear grew in my heart, leaving me feeling like I had no other choice. While I acknowledge that my actions were wrong, I hope that by sharing my explanation, Sư cô, you can understand the underlying causes behind my crime.

I have read and reread the events of my past, things I have never shared with anyone. I searched through my memories to understand the reasons behind my actions, trying to uncover the truth of what really happened. As I reflected on these thoughts, I felt a deep sense of shame as I came to terms with the reality of it all.

Dear Sư cô, I’ve written more than a page, and I began to wonder if the memories I’ve shared with you are just a burden I’ve unloaded. In doing so, I hoped to free myself from these long—held troubles. Yet, every time I find calm, these memories resurface, reminding me of my struggles. I hope you can understand the difficulties I must continue to overcome.

Tojin

5.14.    Prison And Prayer

1. is a baker who teaches others to bake. Many have learned to bake well under his guidance. R. sees this career as an opportunity to eventually leave prison early, while also providing something valuable to others. However, an unfortunate event led to R. being placed in solitary confinement. In solitary confinement, R. was locked in a small room twenty—four hours a day, seven days a week, with only two two—hour outings each week. The room has small windows, making it difficult to see the sky or the sun. Life in solitary confinement is incredibly challenging and harsh.
2. was placed in solitary confinement due to the disappearance of a kitchen tool—a potato peeler. It was unclear whether it was lost or stolen. Despite thorough searches, the tool could not be found. As a result, all fourteen members of the cooking team were placed in solitary confinement while awaiting a third search. I have been in solitary confinement for three weeks and will be here until next Friday. At that time, all of us could be either released or permanently banned from cooking. The situation could result in collective punishment for the entire team or the search could be extended for another thirty days. The outcome is uncertain. This incident led to a significant disruption, with the prison being locked down for four days and the entire facility under tight control.

Honestly, I don’t believe that equipment was stolen. Nobody is stupid enough to do that. Everyone knows the consequences will be extremely serious. I thought it might have been accidently thrown in the trash.

However, if someone is found responsible, I’m certain they will face serious consequences. Personally, I’m not concerned because I had no involvement in the missing potato peeler; I did not steal it. Of course, I haven’t done anything wrong, but being part of the kitchen committee, I can’t guarantee that I won’t be punished. Hopefully, by next Friday, we’ll have more clarity on what will happen.

A month later ...

The search was over and I got out of the cell. Everything is back to normal. I am grateful to be able to escape this painful situation.

I am desperately praying to overcome this situation. I believe my prayers are guided by something profound and spiritual, rather than just being random. I often wonder why I feel this way. Some might think that personal challenges resolve for other reasons, but you must understand that before I started practicing Buddhism, I never prayed, and very little ever seemed to happen by chance in my life. Furthermore, my prayers are rarely general; they are specific and intentional. In prison, an individual doesn’t necessarily need to be guilty or have done something wrong to be punished. Often, an employee’s reasoning lacks sufficient evidence or justification, yet penalties are still imposed. This particular situation is an incredibly important matter to me. I also firmly believe that the way each person is treated is the result of my sincere prayers to Sakyamuni Buddha, Vajrasattva, and the many mantras I have learned.

I’m sure you understand that I don’t wish to focus on all the grim details of prison life, but it is undoubtedly one of the harshest environments where the most awful things can occur. Prisons house some of the worst people, the most disgusting. Like anywhere else, there are those who are weak and those who are strong. The strong often prey on the vulnerable—the young, the naive, and the defenseless—leading to destructive outcomes.

Some prisoners exploit the vulnerable, extorting money, food, supplies, and anything else they desire from those who are weaker. Men rape men, force them to submit to them, force them to go into prostitution, force them to do inappropriate acts. The plans of each criminal Sư cô are hard to imagine. Prisoners are threatened, exploited, extorted, beaten, assaulted, solicited, and sometimes killed. They were physically and psychologically assaulted by other prisoners, discredited with brutal cruelty. The reasons behind these actions are countless, and they persist because this is the nature of prison life. Many individuals who find themselves in crisis are often thrown into solitary confinement, worsening the already dire situations they faced outside, leading them to become more dangerous, ruthless, and inclined to exploit others. In recent years, the state prison system has improved due to significant efforts by the government to curb gang activities and better manage issues affecting inmates. However, a prison is still a prison, and terrible things continue to occur within its walls. Prisoners reflect the broader society; they are a microcosm of the outside world.

I bring all this up because I want you to understand and recognize that more than anywhere else, it is impossible to form true friendships in prison. Prisoners often advise that it’s fine to be close and friendly, but never to truly make friends. Trusting someone in prison can leave you vulnerable, and other inmates may exploit that weakness. In addition to the dangers that already exist in prison, there are also plenty of deceptive and false appearances. Therefore, it’s crucial to remain cautious and aware, always guarding against misjudgments. Wearing a mask— keeping up a façade—is often necessary for survival.

Three years ago, I met a young man who was filled with worry. He was small, innocent, and easily threatened and manipulated. He had recently gone through a trial and had been taken advantage of by another prisoner, who dominated him in various ways. He was twenty—eight years old. Despite having a relatively serious criminal background and spending years in prison, he remained somewhat naive, kind, and thoughtful—he was not the typical prisoner. I admired his honesty, and we often had long conversations. Over time, although I hadn’t planned on it, a friendship began to form between us. I must admit, I was a bit surprised because I had been cautious about forming such bonds for years, as I’ve explained earlier. Anything resembling friendship in prison complicates life. I’ve seen many friendships fade, fall apart, and lead to disappointment. The problems others faced became lessons for me to learn from.

But this friend of mine is different, and I believe I’ve changed as well in retrospect. We don’t share many of the same interests. He enjoys reading fiction, while I prefer studying Buddhist scriptures. He loves playing soccer, whereas I’m more inclined towards weight training. Despite these differences, we both share a love for soccer, and our beliefs have many similarities. Our shared sense of humor, innocence, and harmony offer a much— needed respite in the midst of the harsh and oppressive environment of imprisonment.

This is quite a long explanation, but it connects to my belief in prayer and how it has influenced the situation. He is one of the fourteen prisoners working in the kitchen, and I care about his placement and his well—being. Although I didn’t specifically pray for this, I believe my prayer for his safety and well—being has kept him free from harm. He was placed in solitary confinement five days before me, and I prayed for him not to live with anyone during that time.

Once I was released from solitary, I could stay with him again, as we usually share a room. These events seem more than just coincidences; they feel extraordinary, and I feared for him when he went ahead without me to protect him, worrying about potential dangers like rape or blackmail. In the absence of any other option, I could only rely on my prayers to Buddha and the Bodhisattvas for his safety. It’s through this belief that everything unfolded the way it did. I feel immense relief and happiness knowing that everything has turned out peacefully. It seems that nothing bad happened to him in the end, despite the risks.

This prison is much harsher than others. For me, maintaining my Bodhisattva conduct while in solitary confinement has been crucial. Solitary confinement is a place filled with madness, anger, and hatred. The prisoners constantly scream, twenty—four hours a day, every day of the week, without pause. There is no consideration or respect for one another. In my twenty—nine days there, I encountered insults, foul language, racial discrimination, and contempt for others—something I had never experienced before, even after years in prison. It was deeply sad. There was no meaningful contact between prisoners, and instead of fighting, they would spit or throw feces and urine at each other. The constant screams, complaints, and curses from mentally unstable individuals in these cages were hard to bear. I believe this environment breeds countless atrocities and inhumanities.

It is challenging to witness and be immersed in such an environment while striving not to give in to anger and its destructive roots. I make an effort to reflect on the impermanence of things, avoiding negative thoughts or speech towards others, and instead focus on cultivating pure body, speech, and mind. I follow the five precepts and regularly recite sutras. This practice is what sustains me amidst the ocean of samsaric suffering and helps me apply the teachings of the Buddha.

It is challenging to witness and be immersed in such an environment while striving not to give in to anger and its destructive roots. I make an effort to contemplate conditioned things, avoiding negative thoughts or speech towards others, and instead focus on cultivating pure body, speech and mind. I observe the five precepts and regularly recite sutras. This practice is what sustains me in this ocean of samsaric suffering and helps me apply the teachings of the Buddha.

Ryan

5.15.                               Competing For The Bathroom

January 17, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

As the nun knows, life in prison is filled with daily struggles, from disputes over where to eat, where to sleep, to even how to take a bath. One such incident occurred when I shared a bath with another prisoner who claimed ownership of that particular space. In truth, it didn’t belong to anyone, but this prisoner insisted it was his. I didn’t feel the need to argue, especially since there were thirty or forty other bathing areas available. However, what caught my attention was the encounter with a person I would never have imagined would come into my life. Without the teachings of the Buddha—such as patience, endurance, and the ability to control my reactions—a small disagreement could have easily turned into a violent altercation. I was relieved that, in the end, nothing escalated.

Tojin

5.16.    Freedom Of Religion

Dear Sư cô,

The First Amendment of the US Constitution states: “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion or prohibiting the free exercise thereof.” Despite this, some American prisons have been slow to accommodate religions outside of Christianity. Christian chaplains have long held a dominant position in the prison system. Recently, Judaism and Islam have also gained the right to appoint their own chaplains in certain prisons. However, the right to religious representation has often been fought for by prisoners, particularly Jewish, Black, Native American, and Muslim prisoners who have had to go through lengthy legal battles to secure chaplains for their faiths.

There is also a need for Buddhist chaplains in prisons, though such positions are rare. Buddhism has not been widely developed in Wisconsin, and as the number of Buddhist prisoners is low, finding a Buddhist chaplain is even rarer. However, we do what we can, as you mentioned, and any chaplain—regardless of their religion—who is accepted by the monastics or instructors is allowed to guide and provide spiritual support. This includes Buddhist teachings, which are already precious in their own right. At times, the role of a chaplain in prison can become an interfaith one, which has helped open my view a bit.

Nicholas

5.17.    To Live In Prison

I grew up in the city. Fighting is a normal thing that happened and we gain respect if we win. Just like in prison, you are respected if you are strong. If you are not fighting, then you are weak. So when I need to, I will fight anyone who wants to fight me. I feel satisfied with such a reputation. I thought that if anyone caught my eye, I would beat him. The prison is a harsh place, the circumstances forced me to fight for survival even if I didn’t want to. Why must we fight back? Because I want to live, to protect myself or to prove that no one has the right to abuse or bully me.

In fact, no one wants to feel powerless. That’s why we put on a fierce mask and start a battle to protect ourselves from bullying. It’s important to look at our own minds, as it’s our thoughts that create our motivation. When our mind is focused, our words and actions naturally follow. Cultivating positive motivation is central to Buddhist teachings. If we cultivate bad intentions, the distorted fruit will follow us. Very few prisoners are open to understanding the good, instead opting to react impulsively, hurting others without thought.

Tyler

 5.18.    Upset

Dear Sư cô,

Another painful experience happened to me. What made me angry? I’m angry and disappointed with myself for my past actions, as well as with my current situation and the excesses of the prison system.

Over the past six—seven years, I have witnessed three prisoners being released from prison early and then returned to prison. I’m not sad because I was not released by the prison so I had a chance to make a new life, but sad for the fate of these three prisoners.

Of course, I understand that prisoners are responsible for their actions once they are released, but the people who are supposed to guide them toward rehabilitation also share some responsibility. In many cases, if a prisoner wants to become a better person, they need to learn how to change themselves. There are numerous problems here, including people who commit crimes like assaulting children. They are arrested and then sentenced to a year in prison. After serving that time, they are released, only to continue their harmful behavior. It frustrates me. What really bothers me is that every time this happens, I hold the judge accountable for making an inadequate decision. When a person commits a crime, they face punishment, but what about the judges who make poor judgments? This is what frustrates me, and I believe this is one of the flaws within the prison system.

As you mentioned, the judge didn’t have enough information to fully understand the underlying causes, both inside and outside, of the situation. We shouldn’t place blame on the judge, as they are simply making a decision based on the available evidence. We shouldn’t blame anyone else either. Ultimately, the criminal must take responsibility for their violent tendencies and behavior. I understand that, but it still leaves me feeling sad inside.

Tojin

 5.19.    Revenge

Dear Sư cô,

I know that I have a very violent temperament. There are times when I feel the urge to harbor resentment towards those I hate. Sometimes I want to immerse myself in the sea of alcohol and drugs to bury the pain. There was also a time when I wanted to shoot myself, hoping to escape this misery. But the Dharma and the concern of everyone, including you, helped change that person within me.

Today, you no longer see Kenvin as a hopeless person. Today, I truly want to live and make a positive impact on everyone, even if it’s as small as a blade of grass. I am a Buddhist, someone who has worked to cultivate my mind, love others, and transform myself according to the Buddha’s teachings.

Kenvin

 5.20.    Blame

Daily life in prison leads to different experiences from the outside. Instead of being kind and sympathetic, the daily contact in a prison camp is all about humiliation.

There are constant signals of humiliation embedded in the daily life of both staff and prisoners, whether overtly or subtly, reminding us that we are regarded as second—class citizens—nothing more than a number, a mere cog in the growing prison industrial machine. Even when staff and prisoners exchange casual words, the underlying message is clear, whether subtle or harsh: “You are a prisoner, a criminal, a bad person. I’m not like you. I’m human, I have worth, and you do not.”

I was often amazed at how prisoners seemed to adapt to all kinds of cruel and depressing situations. However, this adaptation comes at a very high cost. We build thick walls of anger and bitterness around ourselves, shielding us from the harsh judgment of the outside world and from our own inner pain and fears. We are buried beneath the weight of guilt. Prisoners rarely reflect on their own faults during these struggles. Our stories are mostly filled with anger, accusations, justifications, and hatred. We blame others, but rarely take responsibility for ourselves.

James

5.21.    Don’t Criticize

What are “mice,” homosexuals, rape guys and all the other scum in this prison system? Perhaps it’s not our place to criticize these people. We’ve been criticized ourselves, and we don’t like it. So why do some people feel the need to wear the judge’s robe and point out the faults of others? Personally, I don’t want to do that.

Do we create bad karma for ourselves when we cause suffering to others? Yes, not only do we harm them, but we also harm ourselves. If we cannot be selfless, then we are being selfish. We should let go of the causes that lead to our own suffering and the suffering of others. Rapists may hurt others, but they can also try to repent and improve. Why should we continue to punish them? We have many other more productive things to focus on. We don’t have time to interfere with others, to sit and criticize, or point out their weaknesses. We must dedicate time to our own practice.

When emotions like anger, jealousy, and greed arise, I know they are not separate from me. They follow us daily, becoming familiar companions. I accept them as part of my nature, so I welcome them. But once I open myself to this acceptance, their ability to control me disappears (because I am not welcoming negative thoughts). I see many people in prison who constantly blame others for their suffering, often without cause. This is because they are dissatisfied with their own lives and responsibilities. We must take responsibility for our own lives and everything that happens to us, allowing others to release their blame. It is meaningful to cultivate kindness, patience, and compassion for others. In any situation, these virtues can ease our suffering and the suffering of those around us.

How do we handle anger, frustration, and accusations? We allow them to dissolve gently. We have been clinging to certain thoughts and meanings for ages. Now is the time to let go of them. That realization was a powerful moment for me. Sometimes, the weight of the complex path toward Buddhahood or liberation can feel overwhelming. At times, I get caught up in the vastness of life’s journey. But then I focus on the present moment, and naturally, I find peace and clarity. We must pay attention to the present as it arises and let go of the clever ideas we believe define us. When we pick an apple and find a rotten spot, we

simply eat around it instead of discarding the entire apple. Similarly, when we look at ourselves, we should show the same respect as we would for that apple. But often, we think we must either reject everything or hold on to it all. We end up clinging to the rotten parts, thinking that the whole is too precious to discard. Instead, we should learn to avoid the spoiled areas and let them go.

Also, don’t be hard on yourself when you react instinctively and notice greed starting to arise. Just observe it. It’s a great step if you become aware of it. Then, let it go. Release the attachment. Don’t act impulsively or punish yourself for what remains inside you.

Finally, this realization came to me. When I first became aware of my defilements, I felt guilty for having them. But then, I was freed from that guilt and allowed the feelings of liberation to arise. I acknowledged that this is how things are, and with that understanding, I no longer respond as reflexively as I once did. No matter what happens, I recognize that I’ve created it, either in this life or a past one. These are the insights I strive to be mindful of. I am aware of my thoughts, mindful of everything that happens, seeing it all as objects of meditation. This awareness allows me to gradually eradicate the defilements within my body, speech, and mind.

I visualize all sentient beings as my biological family, both in this life and past ones. In the past, I listened to them when they spoke and forgave them when I was at fault. I endured their anger and attachment, trying to reconcile. I now accept everything happening to me as the result of my past actions—through body, speech, and influence. When I accept the negative consequences with forgiveness, self—respect, and letting go, the delusion begins to fade. If I start to have negative thoughts, they will continue unless I stop them. This is what I have reflected upon and experienced.

I’m not entirely sure what this means, but I’m just a prisoner trying to practice Buddhism. I pray for good health so that I can overcome obstacles and manifest the enlightened qualities of my teacher within myself. In many situations within this prison, I strive not to hurt others, and as a result, I am not harmed. While violence is hard to avoid here, I have managed to steer clear of it. This, I believe, is an effective practice.

David

5.22.    Walking In The Downtown

Dear Nun,

I have been in the “hole” (administrative segregation) for twenty years, a long time without contact. My world consisted of nothing but four walls, with twenty—three hours a day in the cell. The only person I saw was the guard, who would bring my food every night.

Today, I was transferred to the Wisconsin Secure Program Facility in Boscobel, Wisconsin (super— maximum security). As I sat in the van, I looked through the gap in the door and saw the busy life on the streets. It was Sunday, so many people were out shopping. I saw people walking back and forth, pushing shopping carts, and talking on their phones in front of the mall. Customers filled up their cars at the gas station, paying with a simple tap of their phones to complete the transaction. It was so different from my time twenty years ago when there was no internet or card payments. The changes are striking.

The van drove through tree—lined streets outside the city, and I noticed autumn had arrived. The leaves were falling with a gentle rustle. It felt so peaceful to see the fields and the sky from a distance. A wave of thoughts and emotions flooded me. It had been so long since I last saw such beautiful nature. I wished today’s journey would take longer so I could extend this moment.

Paul

 5.23.    Steal

Dear Sư cô,

My role is to work as an office assistant, helping with the handling of prisoners’ records. I am straightforward with my superiors and take care in completing my tasks. While many inmates try to avoid work as much as possible, they still show respect for those who diligently take care of their responsibilities. As a result, I am highly respected by them as well.

At times, inmates ask me to steal used office equipment for them to use. The senior staff always provided me with the equipment I needed, so I would occasionally share it with the prisoners. However, when they pressured me to steal larger quantities, I firmly told them I wouldn’t do it. I often explained that it wasn’t worth risking my good job for something like that. If a prisoner seemed open— minded or inclined toward religion, I would share with them the five precepts of lay Buddhists that I vowed to follow, including the one against stealing. I made it clear that I could not violate the precept of “taking what is not given.”

Few people believe that stealing from prisons is unethical. Prisoners often see it as taking items from their enemies or as an act of revenge. Even the devout Protestants I know don’t consider prison theft to be an issue. For me, however, theft is a matter of discipline and is directly tied to the discipline I uphold.

I understand why so many prisoners feel the need to resist the absurdities of the prison system, and they see theft as part of that struggle. However, I believe that mindset only leads to self—harm. I often reflect on how the prison system can be reformed to foster self—esteem and promote the development of moral principles, such as Right Action in the Noble Eightfold Path of Buddhism, rather than simply nurturing bitterness, anger, and theft. I hope that one day I may have the opportunity to implement these ideas and make a positive change.

John

5.24.    Suicidal

I remember a passage of the Buddha’s teaching that “The habit is strong now that a series of such actions have happened, your mind is naturally directed there. If the habit is repeated many times and the impression becomes

... strong, we really get used to that habit.”

Dear Sư cô,

I have long harbored the thought of committing suicide when I endured unbearable suffering, and eventually, I began to think about those ideas even when I wasn’t facing immediate pain. It is clearly a source of deep anguish.

The desire to commit suicide and hurt oneself often arises from the suffering inherent in human life. However, thanks to the Buddhist community, guided by monastics like you, I have come to realize that suicide is a great delusion. I now use this impure body to engage in good deeds to make up for past harm, much like a boatman crossing a river. I feel a deep sense of compassion for those who wake up from such despair. When I hear that a prisoner or anyone has contemplated suicide or death, it breaks my heart. I don’t believe it’s something to be taken lightly. I often wonder how I can help prisoners recognize the preciousness of their lives, and how they can practice and bring positivity into their lives. Buddhism, I believe, can serve as a way of life for them.

Nathan

 5.25.    Moribund

Dear Sư cô,

I told you about a prisoner who died and went to the Pure Land. Ken was a tall man, suffering from advanced lung cancer, with only about a week left to live. As a Buddhist who often volunteers to pray for the dying, the chaplain asked me to visit Ken. I entered his room and called out, “Ken, can you hear me?” At the sound of my voice, he shifted slightly and opened his eyes just a bit. His breathing was labored and heavy. He nodded slowly. I then explained to Ken the reason I had come to see him.

Ken appeared to be deeply sedated by medication, almost as if he were still sleeping. Despite being a cancer patient, his body remained large and relatively healthy. Although his breathing was shallow, it hadn’t yet become the rapid, shallow breath of someone nearing death.

I sat beside Ken, softly reciting the name of Amitabha Buddha. Ken nodded and smiled in response. Over the next few visits, he barely reacted. Occasionally, he would open his eyes to look at me, but most of the time, he lay there struggling with his breath. I placed an image of Amitabha Buddha near him, so he could see it and not feel alone. With my humble recitations, I accompanied him on his journey to the Pure Land of the Buddha.

Michael

5.26.    Compassionate Warmth

Dear Sư cô,

I have moved to the fifth prison. There isn’t much difference between this camp and the last one I was in, except that here, there is a lot more mental stress. Many inmates I know have been transferred between correctional institutions, just like me. When I look at the name on the board, I realize that I might be the only Buddhist here. While this isn’t a big problem, I hope to meet other practitioners in this camp so we can exchange ideas and share our practice experiences. After all, as the saying goes, “Eat rice with soup, practice with friends.”

I want to share a few thoughts on compassion. A few days ago, I was watching TV and came across the ending of a sad movie. Even though it was just a fictional story, I still felt heartbroken for the characters who were experiencing sadness. I am quite sentimental, and this reminded me of the intensity of my emotions. But do I truly understand what compassion is? I try to nurture and develop kindness for every being, regardless of who they are or what they have done, even for prisoners. It may seem that prisoners are coldhearted, but that doesn’t mean they lack a compassionate heart. To me, compassion means recognizing the suffering in others’ lives, understanding that all suffering beings are connected, and doing what we can to help them.

Try to plant the seed of compassion in someone this week, even if it’s just one person. Remember that these actions reflect the qualities of a good man. May all beings, especially those in the world of prisoners who deeply need compassionate warmth, experience peace and happiness.

Samuel

5.27.    THE HELL REALMS

I have worked in the prison school for over thirteen years, helping many prisoners—often already angry and resentful about being forced to attend school— learn how to read, study math, write, and pass the GED (General Educational Development) exam, or complete college credits. I work with Asian, African, and South American gang members who have been incarcerated for drug trafficking or illegal entry, as well as with prisoners recovering from mental health issues.

I have decided to open my heart in a hell world filled with suffering, anger, bitterness, despair, and sorrow. I know that spiritual practices and learning are the key [to help others] which is why I am also attending a religious studies course with the hope of guiding many inmates towards mental peace.

Christian

5.28.    Quietly Leaving

I was informed that a friend of mine suddenly passed away in his cell while he was sleeping. He died quietly, with no one there to say goodbye. Security officers came in to take photos of the body and gather his belongings. I tried to hold back my tears as I walked out. I felt a mix of happiness, sadness, emptiness, and confusion. This moment stands as a poignant reminder in the prison world where hearts are often hardened yet sometimes can be touched. It is a fleeting moment of remembrance, a beautiful aesthetic, as we say goodbye to a prisoner who has left both the world of imprisonment and the human world, moving on to the other side.

Noah

 5.29.    Practice

Dear Sư cô,

A few months ago, a well—behaved prisoner arrived at my prison. He liked to play poker. Later, he moved to a room next to mine. Since we were neighbors, I suggested he join me in meditation and chanting instead of playing cards. From that point on, he became a dedicated practitioner.

Practicing in prison offers a unique opportunity to live out the teachings you’ve learned. Unlike the outside world, finding time and space for practice can be challenging, especially if your roommate isn’t supportive. However, I consider myself fortunate to have a very knowledgeable roommate, allowing me to practice in our room.

My practice has been going well, and I feel truly happy about this. Each morning before work, I meditate for an hour, and I also meditate for an hour in the afternoon. Sometimes, around 5 p.m., when my fellow inmates go out for sports, I have a break, and at 9 p.m., I set aside time for my practice. Through this regular routine, my mind feels gently relaxed. My practice is like a spiritual guide on my shoulder, always there to remind me when needed to stay present in the moment and to share compassion and kindness with everyone. It’s a wonderful day of practice in this prison world.

Dylan

5.30.    The Noisy World

It can be helpful to see the prison world as a monastery, as this perspective allows you to see it as a place for practice and spiritual growth. Like a monastery, prison isolates you from the outside world, and life becomes simpler. There are no debts to worry about, nor many responsibilities beyond what you’re instructed to do, whether fulfilling your duties in prison or following the rules in a monastery. While you no longer have direct contact with your family, many still manage to stay connected through mail and phone calls.

Most prisons, like male and female monasteries, are environments designated for each gender. However, prison staff may include both men and women.

In reality, a prison is not like a monastery or ashram for practicing Buddhism. One of the key differences is the environment, filled with noise, chaos, anger, hatred, and boredom. Most of all, a pervasive sense of despair looms over the entire world of prisoners, especially during the winter months when the playground is covered in snow and ice. With winter lasting for half the year in Wisconsin, this feeling of isolation can seem to stretch on indefinitely. Truly, “A day in prison feels like a hundred years outside.”

When I first arrived in prison, my life felt like a pit of chaos. I couldn’t sleep, and my heart was filled with anxiety, torment, regret, and dreams of escape. I shared a tiny cell with another inmate. It had a toilet and a sink, often clogged. This was a common situation; neither of us wanted to use the toilet while the other was in the cell, and neither of us wanted to be there. So, we had to keep everything in order. The potential for conflict was always looming, just around the corner.

The room has a bunk bed and the dormitories house around seventy people, making it incredibly noisy, almost like a market! The prisoners often show rudeness and disrespect towards the people they’ve lived with for long and tedious stretches of time. From morning to night, the noise never stops. It seems like no one enjoys silence. The dormitory is the noisiest place, full of gambling, bingo, and constant bickering. The noise and the lack of personal peace are the biggest obstacles to practicing meditation in prison. From 7 a.m. to 11 p.m., the prison is full of people, and the noise is relentless. Even during the quietest hours, there’s music or sound coming from the TV or radio.

We live with constant noise—televisions and radios blaring 24/7. Inmates scream at one another, and fights occur almost all the time. It’s miserable!

Benjamin

5.31.    Stand Up After Falling

Dear Sư cô,

I recall that the first day I entered the prison, my body was heavy with sadness. Sorrow is always present, right on my shoulders, in the corner of my consciousness, a black hole of despair and darkness.

I remember when I was in the county jail, while I was waiting for the trial and the sentence, I just naturally wanted to lie down and die. In the morning, when I heard that I had been given a twenty—year sentence with no pardon, my knees dropped. My lawyer had to help me stand up. I still hear the plaintiffs rejoice, like they were glad when the jury decided to convict all the prisoners. I feel like my life ended right there.

The reality of the loss of a son, the loss of the family and the life I have experienced has brought to me suffering and despair that I have never experienced before. At that time, my mind was reeling, I could no longer discern the surroundings. At that time, there was only one fleeting thought in his mind, “Don’t let those bitches find your crying.” That’s the past.

In my heart I still harbored hatred and sorrow until the day I met the Buddha Dharma. I no longer blame everyone and I accept my imprisonment as a test and a place that makes me come to Buddhism.

Logan

 5.32.    Money

Dear Sư cô,

Although the prison does not limit the amount of money you put in a bank account, you are only allowed to spend up to $125 per month. You can also exchange coins for up to $15 per week to pay for washing machines, dryers, and junk food machines, but, at any time, you are not allowed to keep for youself more than $20. If you are caught, you will lose that money and, at the same time, sometimes will be placed in solitary confinement. At a minimum, you lose your “long—term sleeping” which means you have to start from the beginning, sleeping on an upstairs bed in a large, noisy public bedroom. However, there are still prisoners who hold more than the assigned amount of money, either by hiding it or sharing with other inmates to keep.

The spending limit is $125 a month, the main goal being to limit prisoners’ “over consumption,” even with relatives’ money. Most prisoners have no one to send money and full—time employment in the prison only

pays from $11 to $60 a month, but most people make only

$25 a month. Many, especially the patients who account for about two—thirds of the prisoners, earn only about

$4 a month to work part—time, or not earn any money at all. Some inmates find some other honest work, either washing, ironing clothes, cleaning the room, or cutting hair for other prisoners. Some people make greeting cards, portraits, embroideries or art objects to sell to increase their income. Many people sell their food in secret, or anything to find money. There are a few lucky people who can find money to send home!

You can live in jail without money. The prison provides you with three daily meals, work clothes and necessary sundries. You can throw prison clothes with your name and prison number on the laundry and a few days later it will appear in your clothes compartment. Socks and towels you may change daily.

Being poor in prison is also a pain. You feel helpless because you cannot buy things which our society sees as a supreme focal point of human status. But in prison, no one looks down on the poor, on the condition that you don’t go around borrowing everyone’s money or things. Some people have adapted to live frugally, even though they have a high social status in society. However, most people find ways to have money.

Prisoners are not allowed to give each other valuable things, so all the trades were in violation of the rules and were punished. But it is out of control and prisoners often buy and sell valuables, trade goods and services, lend money for profits or gamble. The medium of exchange is coins, postage stamps, cigarettes, and miscellaneous items. That is the prison world we are living in.

Brandon

5.33.    Patience

My room had two prisoners and a two—story bed. Roommate’s name is Peter. Peter sleeps on the upper bunk. He usually doesn’t respect anyone, especially me. He only socializes with the gatekeeper and is not close to any other prisoners. At night, he would lie on his bed screaming, singing, and cursing. I was in the lower bunk silently hoping for him to shut up early. I dare not open my mouth to complain and dissuade for fear of being an excuse for him to berate me.

I need to reflect back on myself, because sometimes I don’t like the foolishness of others because I am smarter. I sometimes judge other people’s actions and words offending me, like that prisoner Peter. Peter is bragging that he is smarter than everyone and the people around him are obnoxious, damnable, and abusive. I don’t know which religion Peter is in. We were in the same room but like two extremes, we did not interact with each other. I do not want to report this incident to the staff, because I do not want him to be put in solitary confinement.

I am imprisoned in bars. Peter is also imprisoned in bars, and moreover, Peter is imprisoned by his ego, ignorance, anger, and madness. I endure every day and am glad when the results of each day of suffering are over.

The antidote to anger is patience. If someone strikes you with a stick, do you get angry with the stick? No, because it’s the person who is at fault. But what causes the person to act? It’s when they lose control due to their own mental distress. The key is recognizing that it’s mental suffering, not the person, that truly matters. By understanding this, you can let go of anger, cultivate patience and compassion for the ignorance that leads others to behave this way.

We chant “om ma ni padme hum” to bless them.

Zachary

5.34.    Situation In Prison

I have spent ten years in state prison, and I am a man with a history of promiscuity and opium use. I am also an artist, a musician, and someone who is now seeking to use my time more purposefully.

I’m not sure what others experience, as I don’t have much knowledge of this kind of life in prison. I have made mistakes due to my own foolishness, which has led to my separation from society. I contributed to this by lending a car to someone who used it for illegal activities.

I studied philosophy, meditation, and Buddhist cosmology. When I first arrived in prison, I committed to practicing in order to transform the remainder of my life. Although the practice hasn’t yet led to a complete shift in my mindset, I believe that with true dedication, the results will eventually come.

I did not experience any problems when I first went to prison. This is a lousy prison with violence, profanity, rape, robbery, stabbings, and assault. The cell is small and dirty, without hot water. There is only hot water once a week for five minutes, in a public bath with more than two hundred prisoners at a time. There were no phones to call home, no TVs, no microwaves and no fancy amenities (though some of these would be available later).

One time, I intervened to stop a young boy from being raped in a small room at the hospital. As a result, I became the enemy of the rapist, though he never touched me. At that time, I stood 6 feet 5 inches tall and weighed 200 pounds. While my size doesn’t hold much power in this prison, it does intimidate others. I’m not an easy target. This is why those who prey on others tend to avoid those who can offer something more genuine than what they seek.

At that time, I was seen as eligible to join their group. I dislike stealing. I forgive the use of violence against “rats” (parasites, predators, those who use dirty tricks). This made me eligible to become a member of the gang. Since I’m not someone who engages in such behaviors, I was considered eligible to become a member of the gang. I am not a rat so I’m ok. I’m not gay or addicted.

The people in the group grew up around the time of James Cagney and Humphrey Bogart, as well as the model criminals who didn’t associate with those seen as weak or vulnerable, such as rats, gays, or addicts. Good criminals and tough criminals don’t concern themselves with the fate of those who are marginalized, and they never show any signs of weakness. I quickly learned this way of thinking. I adapted, and like a skilled actor, I became one of the tough criminals and was accepted into this new world of prisoners.

I was not granted amnesty because of my drug use along the way. My lawyer argued that I hadn’t harmed anyone, nor had I used substances like LSD or cocaine that could damage my spirit. I’m truly not a criminal; I was simply a misguided person using medication I thought was helpful.

Things started to improve, and after many years, I was released from prison and made my way to New Mexico. However, I became involved in a tragic incident that led to a man’s death, and I was charged with murder. Upon my release from solitary confinement at a prison southeast of Santa Fe, I quickly reverted to my old ways, adopting an “heroic” persona. I was convicted of murder and sentenced to ten to fifty years in prison. My worst enemy was incarcerated, and I was labeled a repeat offender, having previously served time in prison.

DF is one of the worst prisons in the province. Gate guards are those who sell drugs to prisoners and others, and they often resort to brutal violence, sometimes even resulting in death. These actions only escalate the violence within the prison, creating an environment driven by fear. However, it’s best not to focus on the outside world. During the chaotic three days of the Groundhog Day Riot in 1980, at least 133 people lost their lives.

I still believe that, in some situations, violence may seem like a solution. When I watched men torturing each other to death, I did not interfere. I watched as many prisoners collapsed in their pool of blood. The guards only come when the battle is over. In SF, if someone wants you to die, you have to die. The guards didn’t interfere. They ignore the fight. I don’t feel uncomfortable at all. I simply step away from the situation.

Moreover, I really don’t care. The situation is terrible in DF. These windows are broken, so dust, rain and snow can come in all year round. Hot water sometimes goes away in the winter. Food is beans, rice, sometimes pieces of meat with hair sticking to it ... I want to write a book full of what I have seen, but not now, maybe after leaving the camp.

A few years later, I was arrested by a federal officer because my former inmate was found with my son’s .22 rifle during a camping trip in the National Forest Park. The gun was legally possessed, as it belonged to my son, not to me. However, when you’re involved in a murder case in this country, you have to be extremely cautious to avoid any uncertainties, and I failed to steer clear of such pitfalls. I’m currently serving a fifteen—year sentence as an armed career criminal. I’ve been in prison for thirteen years and one month, and I have just under two years left until my release.

Elijah

 5.35.    Gluttony

Dear Sư cô,

Most of the inmates are young men, so their capacity to consume food is quite large. They are very strong and greedy, more so than ordinary free people outside. Perhaps the reason is the lack of nutritious components in their bodies. The prison diet is enough for them to live and work. Sometimes on holidays or on Wednesdays, they are treated to delicious food. Just imagine there is a fragrant piece of grilled beef, a piece of pizza full of cheese—our mouths were drooling.

I would like to tell you a story of a friend of mine named David. Because he was not mindful, one day after accepting his meal, he grabbed a seat in a quiet corner. Without thinking, he immediately stuffed a large piece of meat into his mouth, only to realize he couldn’t chew it. David swallowed it as if he were afraid of someone stealing it. The piece of meat was so large and tough that it got stuck in his throat, leaving him unable to breathe. David was in a state of panic, desperately looking at the people around him for help, but no one noticed, as they were too focused on their own meals. Left with no choice, David used all his strength, pressing on his throat with his hands to dislodge the meat. Miraculously, the large chunk flew out, about the size of five fingers. From that day on, David learned to be more mindful of his actions, realizing that greed almost cost him his life.

I advised David to practice mindful eating by chewing slowly and focusing on his breath. By doing so, he would enjoy the taste of his food and be more aware of his breath. This approach embodies the dignified posture and mindful eating practices of the temple.

Rustad Drug Abuse Correctional Center

5.36.    Let Go Of Grasping

I’m Kenvin, eighteen—year—old son precious son from a rich family. I was living freely with alcohol and rubbish, and I loved my mother and my partner immensely. After landing in jail, I had to rely on letters from my mother and her to survive. My mother wrote me every week and without her kind words, l couldn’t have endured. Life became unbearably hard, and I found everything around me cruel and difficult.

Later, I found Buddhism, began meditating and reading scriptures. Gradually, I became less attached to those letters. I realized that my attachment was a form of clinging, and I worked on not letting anger arise when faced with disappointments. I reminded myself that I didn’t need letters to feel happy, as they were external. I learned to be self—reliant, finding happiness within myself. The contents of the letters no longer affected me, nor did the presence or absence of letters from family or friends. I understood that when we misunderstand life and our surroundings, we become absorbed in external things, leading to our own suffering.

I began to realize that everything external was temporary, and as a result, my heart became calmer. The Buddha’s teachings are profound and meaningful. I no longer cling or act out of self—interest. I try to balance my thoughts and emotions in alignment with the Dharma. By observing the true nature of things and staying present, I can let go of attachment and experience true happiness. My heart felt as light as clouds. This inner peace allowed me to live happily, even within the confines of the prison where my karma had brought me.

Kenvin

5.37.    Prison Of The Mind

When I was younger I felt myself inferior and worthless.

When I grew up, I confirmed this by reducing my efforts to

improve. Soon, I hated the people around me, and I began to commit crimes. I always remember my pain, the loss caused to others and their hatred towards me.

I have now been in prison for twenty years, where I am forced to confront my own mind or die. After escaping for the third time and being caught, I faced an extended sentence, adding many more decades to my time. My heart was full of suffering and shame. I wanted to commit suicide. Lucky for me, it was during this dark period that I discovered the Buddha’s teachings and began to contemplate my mind.

Later, I shared my inner pain with the other monastics and you. I wanted to stop the violence in my life, and I realized that self—hatred is a form of violence in itself, with its destructive power often being more harmful than using violent weapons to hurt others.

This was a new discovery for me: hating myself is a useless and ineffective illusion, especially when trying to cultivate compassion for others. I recognized that my actions stemmed from greed, hatred, and ignorance, but these qualities are not my true nature—they are simply aspects of existence. I am the emptiness, the anger, the ignorance, and the Buddha nature. This understanding allowed me to forgive myself, ending the self—inflicted violence of self—hatred. I felt a sense of liberation, breaking free from the prison of my own mind. All of this came as a wake—up call.

Angel

 5.38.    Pure Silence

Dear Sư cô,

On the full moon day of the first lunar month, I vowed to observe a day and night of complete silence as a way to calm my mind, limit my disorder and confusion, and gain control over my body, speech, and thoughts. Practicing this in prison proved to be especially helpful, as it is a place filled with aggression, hatred, and frequent quarrels, all often stemming from harsh words. Nobody listens to anyone, and their conversations are filled with countless hurtful and useless remarks. It is true that “disasters come from the mouth.”

This was a private practice. The inmates who knew I was praying or meditating ignored me but the staff, unaware of my vow, would occasionally need to ask me something. Despite being in a day of complete silence, I would respond when necessary, as the Buddha’s precepts allow for abstaining from speech to avoid disorder and opening speech when there is a valid reason. This flexibility allowed me to answer the staff when required, and once the task was done, I would return to my silence.

This was the first time I practiced keeping silent, and I felt a bit uncomfortable. My female roommate noticed but didn’t ask about it. However, my habit of speaking was so strong that I felt an urge to burst out, especially when I saw my roommate moving around in a way that seemed dizzying to me. Yet, I tolerated it and ignored the impulse, reminding myself that I had taken a vow of silence, so I practiced patience.

I mindfully recite the Compassionate Sutra and Heart Sutra and recite the Buddha’s name. Then I made a vow:

With pure heart, I vow to give up all evil. With pure heart, I vow to do what is useful.

With pure heart, I vow to benefit all sentient beings. With pure heart, I vow to give up doing bad things. With pure heart, I vow to practice good things.

With pure heart, I vow to benefit all sentient beings.

1. I promise to abstain from killing.
2. I promise to abstain from
3. I promise to abstain from
4. I promise   to   abstain   from   the   intoxicating
5. I promise to abstain from discussing the errors of
6. I promise to abstain from praising yourself and lowering others.
7. I promise to abstain from defaming the
8. I promise to abstain from malice, hatred, or harm to anyone.
9. I promise to abstain from destroying the Triple

Gem (Buddha, Dharma, Sangha).

10. I promise to help others, following Buddha’s teaching to respect all sentient beings, cultivate, and awaken. Therefore, the practice is to allow us to reflect on our own mind.

After making my vow and reiterating the vows I held, I felt extremely peaceful. I spent my days in pure silence with the intention of being noble, making me so light and happy as if I were in a quiet temple.

Susan

Taycheedah Correctional Institution, Maximum/medium security, Fond du Lac, Wisconsin

5.39.    A Corner Of The Cell

Dear Sư cô,

In this thorny prison, we have the similar situations of waking up every day and breathing every moment. Many people who lack mindfulness, education or morality will affect the other prisoners being held in their small cells. Yesterday, a prisoner interrupted everyone’s line. This is a hierarchical order. First come, first served. Second come, second served. But the impoliteness still happens a hundred times a day in jail. Most prisoners are crazy. They are not afraid to create frustration for the surrounding prisoners. They are not satisfied themselves and want to disrupt by cutting off the line of people standing and waiting. They want others to be crazy with them too. One prisoner was brutally beaten after lunch and they left him lying in a pool of blood. Last week, a guy who broke in line was ambushed, beaten unconscious. Many people were slashed on their way back to their rooms.

I believe that the Buddha’s teachings on acceptance and compassion are especially important in situations where violent or harmful actions are common. In such cases, it is better to seek reconciliation and resolve conflicts through calm communication.

If someone suddenly interrupts me, cuts in front of me, or spoke over me while I was talking, I would remind myself that he, too, is a suffering person. Just like us, he is searching for happiness. He wants to be treated with kindness and respect. If he were free from greed, hatred, and delusion, he would awaken his body, speech, and mind and wouldn’t cause disturbances. With this perspective, I chose to remain silent and respond with compassion towards his thoughtless actions.

At this point, we should remember what we have to do. For example, if we have to accomplish something, we should do it without bothering others. We should not see ourselves as more important or superior to those around us. When we let self—esteem grow unchecked, it leads to a sense of superiority that causes us to despise others and stop seeing them as equals. We criticize them, becoming more judgmental, and begin to see them as separate from us. As this sense of alienation increases, we detach ourselves from their struggles, causing us to dislike them without experiencing any suffering ourselves. However, these negative consequences still affect us. The harmful patterns of thinking—like hate, hostility, and criticism— remain ingrained in our psychological flow. These are the very things that hurt us the most. They reside within us, in our minds. We may remove a limb if it becomes harmful, but have we ever let go of the habits that harm our good hearts?

Every time we think about harming others, we end up hurting ourselves because we continue to maintain a negative mindset and attitude. Negative words and actions always start with harmful intentions and motives. If we truly wish to cultivate positive outcomes in our lives, we must start from within. Through self—reflection, we can uncover the deeper motivations that drive our actions and work towards cultivating positive causes from the inside out.

This is the result of my inward meditation sessions.

Jack

5.40.    Prisoners Have Too Many Privileges

Dear Sư cô,

I am currently in administrative segregation due to my past actions, and I am managed this way for the safety of everyone. As a result, I face many limitations. However, I am still allowed to borrow books from the library. If I really want to improve, I have access to a wealth of knowledge that I can study and expand upon.

There are also many opportunities for prisoners to sign up for classes in preparation for life after release. The Criminal Justice Policy Council recently said that a prisoner’s level of education is directly linked to their success after being freed, which is why they encourage prisoners to improve their knowledge while in prison.

Education plays a crucial role in post—release success. Those with more education tend to secure better jobs with higher salaries, while those who repeatedly re—offend often struggle with low—paying jobs. Every camp system has an educational program that we must take advantage of if possible. There are also programs such as avoiding substance abuse, anger management, career development, and religion. I believe that if we study with the intention to improve ourselves, we will see positive results. Personal responsibility and motivation are key to transforming who we are.

The legal system, however, has many flaws. Due to corruption or neglect, it often fails to fulfill its responsibilities to both detainees and the society it is intended to protect. The problem isn’t that the system is ineffective, but rather that society’s perception of crime and punishment needs to change. As prisoners, we often see injustice as something that fuels our anger and resentment. Meanwhile, society lives in fear of becoming victims of crime, calling for retaliation and revenge. I believe that for politicians and the public to change their views and prejudices, we prisoners must first make the effort to change ourselves.

A recent poll at the University of Connecticut showed that 52 percent of students feel prisoners have too many privileges, while 24 percent believe prisons are too lenient in their treatment of inmates. How can we change this attitude? How can we shift the public perception if we don’t change ourselves first? There are many obstacles in our way. Some people don’t want to see us change, while others may want us to change but don’t believe that it’s possible. Some have trusted us in the past, only to be disappointed or taken advantage of.

I don’t expect people to forgive or forget simply because of my age or the time I’ve served. The public will continue to be vigilant and wary of us, the offenders. We must prove ourselves. We must find a better path forward. Every time we witness something positive, we need to commit to practicing it. Even if the system remains flawed and public attitudes remain negative, we must choose to transform ourselves, challenge old prejudices, and take a stand. It is up to us to change.

Caleb

 5.41.    Joy In Prison

Dear Sư cô,

Sitting in a solitary cell today, I (Randy) realized something profound about my life and situation. This identification is like a ray of light. I feel like I bumped into a big fortune by chance.

In the cell I have many books of Buddhism, offered to me by associations and you. Reading them helps me a learn a lot about my approach to life and understanding the key to finding a happy place in this prisoner world.

I have escaped four times, so I am currently being held in the Waupun Correctional Institution (a maximum— security prison), where security is tight. This correctional camp is like a medieval fortress of red stone structures rising up in the blue sky, while the space is full of creaking sounds from the heavy doors of the prison as they are closed and opened. I have spent forty years in prison. Why waste life in this prison? So, I kept trying to escape from prison all the time but couldn’t escape. Finally I had to accept it here and remodel myself.

A fellow inmate introduced me to Buddhism, and I began studying the Buddha and asking for Buddhist books to study. I am fifty years old and as I look at my past, I realize how selfish and proud I was. If something wasn’t mine, I wouldn’t care about it. If no one acknowledged my abilities or successes, I was indifferent. I truly believed, “I am the center of everything. I am important, the center of the universe.”

Looking back at my own life, I see the waste of my life. I gave up the opportunity to help others and share love. Awakening is painful and I resolved to start from this moment and not to waste any good opportunities to practice. My firm belief is that I will expand the love and wisdom for my life journey and heal the countless wounds I have inflicted upon others. It was so light in this understanding that freedom took me away from the bars that locked me in. This journey may be selfish or useless, or it may now take a higher path to love and respect for others. Because of that thought, I was not disappointed anymore and rejoiced when I knew about the beauty of life and that I would be a small part of it.

Randy

5.42.    The Fellow Inmate

Dear Sư cô,

For prisoners, making friends is one of the hardest things to do. We often worry whether a friend might pose a threat or run off when faced with tough situations. The world of prisoners is a world of suspicion and distrust of each other. So, few people think about the importance of cultivating bonds of brotherhood.

I live with a prisoner named Mark and we have been

friends for over thirty years. We had many conflicts in life and Mark taught me great lessons about friendship.

Every Sunday morning, we read the Bible together. It seems that in my past, I was blind in my beliefs and actions. Even so, one day came, I lost faith in God and began to fall into the old ways like using drugs, fighting, and treating people around me badly. Soon, Mark followed my bad example. We started selling opioids and worked as gay sex brokers in the prison to earn money. We had money then we became bored with it.

I tried to escape from prison again to shorten my time, but I did not succeed and was transferred to the camp. Before I left, I stole Mark’s money. Mark did not complain or report this problem to the guards. I am living at the Redgranite Correctional Institution in Wisconsin. It was here that I decided to live and make a change in my life by learning Buddhism. At the same time, Mark heard me and wrote a letter to forgive me because we were friends for more than thirty years, after all.

This touched me and showed me the priceless nature of true friendship which is rooted in forgiveness and healing. This made me think of other people who treated me poorly, and I realized I should offer them the same kind of friendship that Mark gave me. May we all encounter such people in this prison—like world. They are like pure gold hidden in gravel.

Jacky Racine Correctional Institution Medium Security, Sturtevant, Wisconsin

 5.43.    Advantages

Dear Sư cô,

I don’t know where this saying comes from, but I really like it:

“There is no failure except in giving up. There is no failure except from within. The only real barrier is our own lack of determination!”

This proverb inspired me because it reminded me not to give up, regardless of the circumstances. Even though my body is weak, my strong will can achieve great things. We must overcome our weaknesses.

Looking back, I see that I am antisocial and had a strong dislike for people around me. I quickly judged others with a small and arrogant mindset, without truly listening. These are some of the bad habits I had.

Prison doesn’t have to be a place of torment and guilt. This is a weakness we can overcome by transforming ourselves into compassionate and loving individuals, we can bring peace and kindness to both others and ourselves, even after enduring harsh circumstances. This is the real strength. We can connect to others by sharing our fears and shortcomings. Eventually, the acceptance of the pain we caused and the decision to use compassion instead of hatred and sin empowers us to rise above our surroundings.

Harry Taycheedah Correctional Institution, Maximum/medium security, Fond du Lac, Wisconsin

 5.44.    Hunger Strike

Dear Sư cô,

I made a mistake and got thrown into solitary confinement. This dungeon room is cold, and the surroundings were very quiet at first. Suddenly I heard screaming and banging on the iron doors. I feel this is not a good place for me. I considered protesting by going on a hunger strike to resist the injustice of being locked in this dark, noisy corner of solitary confinement. But I remembered Sunday’s menu had steak, so I gave up my intention to go on a hunger strike. With a heavy heart, I just accepted the screams of the psychopathic prisoner in the other cell.

Day by day, I understood that I was trying to control circumstances beyond my reach. The lack of energy and control over even the smallest thing in life is one of the hardest things a prisoner will face. Most prisons impose control over inmates, and when we’re subjected to that domination, we try to take control. This often leads to destructive behavior. We resort to extreme methods to deal with our anger but all it did was leave us bloodied and shackled in solitary confinement.

I realized I have to control myself mastering my body, speech and my mind in the direction of goodness. In the world of prison, if the mind is balanced, the environment becomes balanced. That is the solution. I began to contemplate the suffering of the mentally imprisoned inmates next door and around me, and I offered peace and serenity to them. How gentle and easy to breathe! My mind seemed completely still.

Justin

5.45.    Live in the Here and Now

Dear Sư cô,

There is a saying, “Yesterday was a dream and tomorrow is yet to come. Today you live from the experiences of yesterday. Make every day a happy one and tomorow will be a beacon of hope.”

This summarizes the way I am trying to live in the present. We can transform our past suffering and bring hope to the future by not clinging to the past by simply living in the present moment of peace here and now.

For some people, the past holds fond memories, and they like to dwell in those nostalgic thoughts. They navigate through the present as if trapped, unaware that they only deepen their suffering by allowing their present moment to slip into the past.

Then there are those who like to dream about the future. They believe that once they are free from prison, life will be greater, things will become easier, and happiness will come. They convince themselves by imagining a better future, firmly believing that these dreams will naturally come true and they will easily achieve what they envision.

In fact, they will be disillusioned with this kind of thinking about the past and the future because the present moment is the only time where we can make the necessary changes to become better people to create the happiness we seek.

By living in the present moment, we can truly live and

transform our suffering into insight, understanding its cause and making the necessary changes to create happiness. We must realize that neither the past nor the future should be clung to or hidden in. When we neglect the present and live in the past or future, we only compound our suffering. As the Buddha taught: “The past is gone, the future has not come, only the present is the peaceful dharma.”

Zen Master Nhất Hạnh taught that when we learn to acknowledge, embrace, and understand our suffering, we suffer much less. Not only that, but we’re also able to go further and transform our suffering into understanding, compassion, and joy for ourselves and for others.

Austin

5.46.    Uposatha Day

Tojin and some of his companions have already received the five precepts and the Bodhisattva precepts (ten vows and twenty—eight vows). Once a month, they often recite precepts at Greenbay Prison. Sometimes Venerable Tonen or I (Venerable Giới Hương) would come to attend and guide them. If not, Tojin and his group would recite the precepts by themselves as Tojin writes:

Dear Sư cô,

We deeply appreciate Uposatha Day, a time when we gather together, kneeling side by side, to reflect on the precepts we have vowed to uphold. On this day, we repent for any missteps and make a renewed commitment to observe the precepts more diligently in the future.

We feel immense joy in recognizing the progress

we’ve made in the Zen life since encountering the guiding light of Buddha—Dharma. We have taken meaningful steps forward on our spiritual journey.

We vow to uphold the precepts so that the Buddha— Dharma may endure throughout the past, present and future. This is our solemn pledge before the Buddhas. May all desires and obstacles be transformed and may the light of awakening shine upon us forever. Our deepest thanks to Master Giới Hương and Venerable Tonen.

Tojin

5.47.    Depending Upon Beings

Dear Sư cô,

Another day has passed. I did not complete the letter yesterday to send to you because another prisoner insisted on using the typewriter. How long will it take you to finish I asked him. He said thirty minutes. I waited more than an hour. He continued to use the typewriter. I asked him how longer I must wait for it and he didn’t answer showing an unhappy face. Seeing that, I think I have to go back tomorrow to type. When I was about to leave, he said, “Wait for five minutes please!” I smiled because I had something to do. Both of us became gentle and our issue turned good.

But there was a time when I could not arrange the situation when I saw a prisoner using the device I also wanted to use. As he continued to go past his assigned time, I began to feel resentful, thinking that he didn’t consider anyone but himself and didn’t care about my needs. I glanced at the content he was focused on and found it less important than my own. This frustration built up inside me, and I felt the urge to say something harsh. I imagined that if I did, we might never be able to look at each other again, avoid one another entirely, or at worst, escalate things to violence.

My own experience has taught me that when I place myself above others, valuing my needs or possessions over theirs, I risk others undermining my purpose. When negative situations arise, no matter how big or small, I’ve learned not to judge or blame anyone, but to simply let them go and practice patience. By seeing myself and others as equals, I naturally become less arrogant and critical. I make fewer mistakes and am less likely to react impulsively when faced with unpleasant circumstances. When we recognize that those around us are pursuing the same goals and enduring the same struggles as we are, and that they deserve the same joys we enjoy, our hearts are filled with compassion and generosity.

Tojin

5.48.    A Good Chance

Dear Sư cô,

When I faced someone who wanted to hurt me, I would habitually practice showing compassion towards that person. I would genuinely create kindness and mercy by reflecting: “This person is suffering. They believe I am to blame, or they may feel better by seeking revenge on me, so I will aim to help them feel better, acting in a way that harmed neither of us.” I tried to show that I didn’t want them to suffer, and if I were the cause of their pain, I would apologize and promise to be more mindful in the future.

The person before me was, in fact, a good friend, as they pointed out the causes of future suffering and the ongoing cycle of suffering. The individual standing before me presented a challenge in my journey toward awakening, and this challenge was a valuable opportunity. In the past, it was a mistake to ignore the many golden opportunities that arose to practice and develop our minds. These challenges are like sacrifices, serving as subjects for us to reflect on the state of our practice. They provide an opportunity to liberate ourselves in life. By caring for others and letting your heart guide your mind, there are no truly bad situations, only chances to practice happiness. In doing so, we can live peacefully, even in a world filled with suffering and among those who may cause harm, because all are good challenges for us.

Robert

5.49.    The Art of Living in Prison

Dear Sư cô,

When interacting with others, place their needs before your own and embrace humility, giving recognition to others. This approach is a practice that helps us live peacefully in a world full of challenges. As I breathe in, I see all those around me as good friends, deserving of knowledge and respect. This practice helps me release ego, attachment, and selfishness. As I breathe out, I feel the pain others are experiencing—anger, loneliness, uncertainty, fear of being judged or hurt, fear of being excluded from groups, gangs or friends. These individuals are trapped in delusion and torn apart by ignorance. When we truly reflect on this, we cannot help but feel compassion and no longer respond to them with aggression.

Dialogue is important. Remember that we are no more important than any other prisoner. Let’s be humble. We do not accuse others with harsh words. We do not listen to criticism of others. The one who remains silent is respectful. Let our words reflect the Dharma. True practitioners are to be admired. Above all, we must practice the right way of mind as taught by the Buddha. Our actions, words and speech must align with this practice.

I have been in the most brutal solitary confinement for my past actions, but now I know I am a lover of peace. I see all prisoners as my family, united by our shared human nature, where no one is judged. If anyone attacks me, I won’t hurt them. When we let go of the desire to target others, they are no longer seen as targets. When we step out of the cycle of competition, no one seeks to fight with us. When we lay down our cards, the game comes to an end.

There is no victory or honor when a hero in prison attacks a “lamb” (a newly arrived prisoner, innocent and vulnerable), an elderly prisoner, a weak person, or a pacifist. There is nothing to gain from such actions. Most importantly, they will be ridiculed and humiliated for defeating a victim who does not fight back. Could a world like this be any more beautiful?

Luke

5.50.    Which Prisoner Demonstrates the Greatest Growth?

Dear Sư cô,

The murderers often represent the admirable “cold” heroes among the prisoners. In prison, they are the most silent, firm, and entrenched people. They are often not the source of the problem for most prison settings. It is these long—term prisoners who have murder convictions such as Tojin, Samuel, and myself (Andy) who are devoted Buddhists, often participating in the most useful programs. Because we know we will be imprisoned for the rest of our life here, perhaps the spiritual joy of religion is where we put all our heart and soul. Of course, there are exceptions.

There are also assassins who take pleasure in hurting others and have no interest in changing. Most other prisoners avoid them like the plague. These assassins come from a troubled background, behaving like cruel children who harm innocent creatures, such as tearing off the wings of dragonflies and birds, finding amusement in their cruelty. Fortunately, these cold—blooded individuals are a small minority within the prison population.

Many prisoners who are serving shorter sentences tend to be less trustworthy and less sincere in their actions. They steal from fellow inmates and staff members and engage in deceit and lies. This kind of behavior creates tension and other problems within the prison. Such individuals are likely to continue committing crimes after their release, often becoming repeat offenders because they haven’t transformed themselves, and they may view themselves as less dangerous than the more violent criminals.

The prison world is clearly a very strange place, governed by a set of rules, behaviors, and treatments that are often difficult to fully describe. Each extreme takes a different form, and these extremes lead to one another. Every moment could be someone’s last. To put it simply, if I were locked in a dark room with many prisoners, I would prefer to be with a group of murderers rather than thieves or rapists. The murderers won’t kill me if I stay out of their way, but the rapists would likely violate me, regardless of my actions.

Dear Sư cô,

Most of the prisoners who practice Buddhist meditation at Waupun Correctional Institution in Wisconsin are serving life sentences for murder, as this is a maximum—security facility. Maybe because we know we will spend our entire lives in jail, we no longer expect something better or more exciting to happen, so we strive to rebuild our lives in the best way possible. In this prison, religion is a sacred force that brings meaning and joy to our lives. It also helps us cope with the challenges we face behind bars.

Knowing that we will spend the rest of our lives in prison, we are fully dedicated to practicing and serving. In contrast, those serving short—term sentences for robbery or drug abuse maintain more connections with their families and outside gangs, focusing on preparing for life after their release. For them, prison is only a temporary phase. Their actions, studies, and daily routines here are often superficial, done more for amusement than from the heart. This is the common mindset, as they hold onto the belief that a bright future awaits them outside.

Andy

5.51.    Working

On the afternoon of October 16, 2007, Venerable Tonen and I (Sư cô Giới Hương) visited and preached to female prisoners at Taycheedah Correctional Institution, Taycheedah, Wisconsin. The re—education camp has 780 female prisoners.

This is a women’s prison, and there are more trees and flowers here compared to some of the male prisons I’ve been in. Lush green lawns and lovely multicolored shrubs extend from the gate to the cafeteria. The chapel is near the gate, and as Tonen and I arrived, the clock struck 1

p.m. At that moment, Warden Ana Boatright (the director of the camp), invited Tonen and me to join the prisoners for lunch.

Each meal consists of a glass of fresh milk or soda, bread, mashed boiled potatoes with butter, boiled carrots, finely chopped Chinese salad, peanut butter, and a large piece of steak. Since Tonen and I are vegetarians, we don’t eat beef. Tonen may have joined me in choosing vegetables, though in her Buddhist sect, it’s acceptable to eat either vegetarian or non—vegetarian food, depending on what is offered. I didn’t care for the potato dish, mainly because it lacked the Asian soybean flavor I’m used to. Additionally, the heavy, oppressive atmosphere of the prison made me lose my appetite—similar to the sterile environment of a hospital, mixed with the scent of medicine and a disturbing underworld odor. Still, I had to finish all the food on my plate, not daring to leave anything behind, as wasting food is considered a misdemeanor.

Actually, I had prepared two pieces of baked veggie bread and fresh fruit for Tonen and me, but since the prison authorities didn’t allow outside food, we had to leave it in the car. By the time we finished eating, the dining room was relatively empty, with only about twenty or thirty girls still there. They looked at me with curiosity and smiled, possibly because of my Asian appearance.

Since this is a women’s prison, there are certain unique rules in place. For example, when receiving visitors, the female inmate must sit across from her visitors and is only allowed to hug and kiss twice—once when they first meet and again when they say goodbye. Relatives are not permitted to comb the female prisoners’ hair. Inmates are only allowed to wear wedding rings or necklaces with pendants of Buddha or other religious symbols in accordance with their beliefs. At the corner of the chapel or guesthouse, a female officer is always present, overseeing the visiting activities.

Inmate Mary said that her work here was to water the plants and she coordinated this with her meditation practice in the following way: Early in the morning, she goes to the flower garden and begins weeding. As she trims the tall plants that are out of shape, she reflects on this as a metaphor for a practitioner removing the disruptive weeds of defilement. When she notices the flowers blooming, she saw this as a symbol of the blessings of a joyful mind. When the grass withers away, she sees it as a reminder of the impermanence doctrine. While watering the plants, she views it as a way to nourish the insects, helping them escape from ignorance.

Mary’s awakening was associated with the work of seeding, planting flowers, weeding, watering, and caring for the garden. The beauty of the garden represented her mindful practice. She looked for joy and happiness among the flowers yet recognized that all flowers live only for a brief moment before they fade. This fleeting, ephemeral life mirrored her own.

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

 5.52.    Meditation

Dear Sư cô,

Meditation for me is not just a way to improve health; meditation is the adjustment of wrong views and destructive thoughts. Meditation is valuable because it helps us to be mindful throughout the day. Why? Because I like coffee, smoking, sleeping, listening to music, watching movies instead of sitting meditation. However, when I learned what I should avoid, I realized that my true joy came from letting go of those habits and choosing to meditate instead. I am glad that I have conquered my own desires, just as the Buddha taught in the Dhammapada: “Conquering yourself is the greatest victory.”

Time is our most valuable asset, as once it passes, it’s gone. Therefore, we must invest our time in meditation to overcome negativity.

Aidan

5.53.    Smoking

Prison regulations often contradict each other. Smoking

is prohibited in the rooms, yet the cafeteria sells cigarettes and allows prisoners to buy them, while locking them up in solitary confinement for twenty to twenty—three hours a day. How are you supposed to refrain from smoking under these conditions? Smoking becomes the primary form of entertainment and enjoyment in prison. As a result, some inmates, regardless of the rules, continue to smoke in their rooms. I don’t smoke myself, but living with a roommate who does has been incredibly difficult to endure.

Gavin

 5.54.    Difficulty

Dear Sư cô,

There are many male inmates who are poor, addicted to alcohol, drugs, and abandoned by their families. Their lives are full of violence, suffering, with many becoming involved in gangs. They are often driven to try to overcome their circumstances, but with limited options available to them, they feel they have no other choice.

A number of prisoners from all walks of life and sentences ranging from light to life attempt to write letters to share their experiences and find the best way forward. However, some prisoners have little money and few opportunities to work, leaving them without the means to purchase basic necessities like paper, pens, stamps, envelopes or personal items such as razors, milk, towels, soap, all of which are available for purchase in the prison shop. Everything costs money and since I don’t have a job in prison, I don’t have much to spend.

There are also a number of prisons where the chaplain is a Christian, which may lead to a lack of enthusiasm for promoting meditation or accepting Buddhist books in the library. For instance, Venerable T.N. Giới Hương sent a few dozen Buddhist books to a prison library she visited, but there are still one or two libraries that have not received the books. The reason for this delay remains unclear.

Scott Louis

5.55.    Life in Jail

Terrell McCraw¹⁹ is in his mid—thirties and has been incarcerated since he was seventeen, after being tried as an adult. After a fight with another inmate he was sent to the “hole” or the “box,” technically called administrative segregation, what the public knows as solitary confinement. Here he writes to a Dharma friend about his experience of living and trying to practice Dharma in the hole.

Our life is a simple gleam which comes and

is gone as springtime.

Offers blossoms to fade in the fall. Earthly flourish and decline.

Oh friend, do not fear at all. They are but a drop of dew on the grass of morn!

Long—term segregation throws you into this ocean

and there’s no paddle or boat to cling to, such is your luck

19. “Life in Solitary Confinement” by Terrell http://www.

thubtenchodron.org/PrisonDharma/life_in_the_hole.html

you can’t swim!

A hand gripping at the window grills in a dark place. We’re caught up in this struggle called life.

I too desire to evolve and become a human being who is capable of cohabitating with society. Every day is new for me and each night as I sit in the wee hours, I contemplate that experience: the obstacles that I faced (staff, other prisoners, depression). It’s a daily gauntlet, and all that running breeds anxiety, fear, and paranoia. Replacing this with the Buddha, the Sangha and the Dharma. You, Venerable Chodron, Venerable Robina, and others—you guys can talk about that essence that I only dreamed about: compassion, virtue, loving—kindness. It’s your strengths that feed this change in me on my mind!

As far as my practice, well I am able to sit and meditate and do prostrations in my cell. I’m still locked in my cell twenty—three hours a day so there’s no Buddhist service to attend. I’m also subject to be released from “seg” this June. Six months in the hole is a bit much for a fistfight.

My biggest obstacles while practicing are my next— door neighbors. They call me all the time wanting me to spell this word or to talk about the Bible and so forth. They’re good guys, they just have no concept of silence unless it’s sleeping. Actually, I believe that my biggest obstacle is my fear of failing; it’s that which hinders me most. There’s always this thought of not being good enough. Do I have the courage to walk away from a past that is so haunting?

Yes, I’ve changed. I’ve changed in here! Freedom is another thing that requires more than just words from my mouth and my aspirations to succeed. Even in here, trouble comes in many fashions. The goods and the bads are the same for me in practice. “Wow, I’m really feeling like I want to read or visualize.” Is there a big attachment there, T.? “No, I don’t want to practice today. It’s cold.” Is that a lazy attachment T.? Monks in my sleep, om mani padme hum when I’m awake, T. doesn’t own this body anymore. I’m at these crossroads!

Isolation????? Wow where can I begin? The “box,” also known as the “hole” or “seg,” is the one place that the jailers use to control you. The threat of “You follow my orders or to the box you go!” Control, that’s it! Every convict came to prison for some crime or another. Most guys are victims of a failed system. No jobs, no schools, no hope. We are relegated to these dismal institutions and ordered to rehabilitate.

Once here though, there’s nothing similar to anything called rehab. Instead, we walked through these doors and found degradation at its highest. We found racism at its core: poor suburban Whites dressed in uniforms of gray and black told by the system that it is their duty to guard these deviants. Rulebooks where everybody is good, but the language smelled bad. They wrote this book with a disingenuous heart, trying to determine how I walk, how I talk, how I eat, think and believe!

These rules we must obey challenge the very fiber of my being. There’s no sane reason for asking me to change if you’re only going to place me in a place that contradicts your request of me. For example, rule number one is “No loaning or borrowing.” So you move into a new cell and are still wearing the funk from the county jail. Your cellmate wants to loan you soap and toothpaste and a stamp to write home, but that’s not allowed. These are common items that human beings use, but staff will either make you beg for them for ten times or more, or things that require money to purchase. Most prisoners are broke coming in and need a common courtesy. I know I’ve been there, but staff will ticket you if you’re caught loaning or borrowing these items.

They also create conditions that are dangerous by doing this. No cellmate wants to smell another’s funk. Remember we are already challenged by having toilets in the cell, by being in a cell that is 8 feet by 10 feet and is double bunked. With two people in such a small place twenty—three hours a day, fights, stabbings, and rapes can occur.

The rulebook contains rules that are contradictory. They say no smoking in the cells, but they allow you to purchase smoking items and then lock you down for twenty or twenty—three hours a day. Do you think we are being set up? Smoking is like the number one drug in prison. So, guys are going to smoke regardless of that rule of not smoking in the cells. If I’m addicted to cigarettes then I’m bound to catch a lot of tickets.

Staff again—most of them are just a bunch of poor White farmers dealing with a change in employment. These poor souls have never had to deal with a guy like me—a city kid that knows more than the average dirt farmer. Come on, seriously. Imagine a farmer trying to outwit guys who have had to spend their whole lives caught in deception in order to survival. So we clash, and clash hard. The system is mostly comprised of non—solvable alchemy. How do we solve this problem?

Both can conclude that when thoughts clash and one is a prisoner and the other the “system,” well, let me introduce you to this 8 x 10 cell known as punitive segregation. You get a brick slab for a bed. This slab comes with a plastic mattress that covers four to six steel rings that are bolted to the slab to use for restraining unruly prisoners. You then have the lights, which are controlled by the staff. These lights are often used to torture the prisoners. The light is left on late into the night and often in the wee hours of the morning. This light is so bright that once it comes on, you awaken instantly.

Then we have sink and toilet—these two together when flushed or run sound like construction companies building New York. Then we have the heat. This cell is made of steel and cinderblock, so the temperature depends on if you’re upstairs or down: downstairs means you’re about six feet underground and it’s always freezing cold and damp. If you’re upstairs, welcome to the sweatbox. These are just a few insights into “seg.”

What does living in this situation do to one’s mental stability over long periods of time? When you first get to seg, there’s nothing but anger and your own silence. Maybe you’re washing someone’s blood off your hands. Maybe you’re thanking God that you’re alive. Maybe you’re just crying these silent tears, frustrated that life holds no real meaning. There’s nothing you want to say. All you want to do is go to sleep. Dreams are your only escape. But you’re always awakened by an officer banging on your cell door screaming chow time. That’s when you realize that the fighting never stops.

The first ten or fifteen days, you spend in limbo waiting to be found guilty of your offense. There’s no radio or television, no books. There are only bricks to count and the newest form of death to engage in because solitary confinement means you are doing this time alone. But that’s not really true because you can hear the other prisoners yelling, calling each other bitches and whores. You can hear the screams of the guys that are mental patients. Daily, your cell is being invaded by floods of doo—doo water or the banging that is ritual when staff refuses some guys their meals. Then the goon squad gasses those guys and laugh because actually the gas affects all the prisoners to the point of thinking, “Wow, is this my last breath?”

As always, you’re found guilty of the offense; innocence is a right that only staff can maintain. So now you’re pissed off because you were fighting to protect yourself. Anger rides you. The noise rides you. The smell rides you. Staff rides you. And last but not least, your sanity rides you. Without your sanity, it would be easy to throw your feces on staff or play with your private parts every time a woman worked your unit. Or even flood or bang or yell or cut my wrists. Sanity. How does it stand the test of time? If I had one wish, I would gather my teachers, my friends’ mothers, and my friends into one room and I would say to you all “Because of you, I am alive. And because of you I am able to gather myself and begin to heal.”

All those long stretches in seg. hold a bunch of sad times—times that still to this day give me pause. My own ignorance was adding fuel to the flame, and the scary thing is I may fall victim to my ignorance again. The body is weary. The mind is alive with new ideas. But there’s no satisfaction either. We’re caught up in this struggle called life. My “one step at a time” method keeps me practicing. I’m following the finger (pointing to the moon of enlightenment), but I haven’t been able to let go of that edge that embraces that fight or challenges by staff. My cell is full of photos from my teachers that are in the most beautiful places or backgrounds. I have some of the best Dharma books to read. I even have a little black and white TV and a tape player. But when the cell doors come open, it’s like a bell in a prizefight. All the egos come out and your life could be the next one to become a target.

Terrell McCraw

5.56.    A Quilt of Compassion

Leighton Bates wrote²⁰ that sixty years ago August, 2005, the islands of Nagasaki and Hiroshima, Japan were bombed by the United States, putting an end to a war, but not an end to the pain or the dying of a people whose civilians were innocent of any evildoing. As a result of the atomic blast and later the fallout, the death toll in a year was 270,000 lives.

I was not born yet when this tragedy took place, but its effects have been felt in me over the years. I remember as a teenager fumbling through some discarded old Life magazines and coming upon a photograph in black and white of a little Japanese girl running down the street naked, her clothes obviously burnt off of her. She had such

20. “A Quilt of Compassion” by Leighton Bates. www.thubtenchodron. org/PrisonDharma/a_quilt_of_compassion.html

a frightened look upon her face that I wanted to go back to that time, wrap my coat around her and tell her that she needn’t be afraid anymore. It would be twenty—some— odd years later before I could do something that in a way would be a healing act for her, myself, and the rest of the world—the living and the dead.

At the Oregon State Prison our sangha of Buddhist practitioners meets every Tuesday night for two hours. We are a diverse group with many different lineage followers, yet we all seem to have a common trait of accepting and working together that seems to fit for us.

On one such Tuesday night I arrived at the chapel where we meet expecting to see everyone sitting on blankets meditating in a circle. Usually I am the last one to arrive as my block and tier more often than not is let out last and I have to hotfoot it up the stairs and then run down the long corridor to make it before the cut—off time.

This night though, when I entered the chapel and looked to my left I saw no one. No altar set up, no incense wafting to the ceiling and nobody sitting on a blanket in a circle. Just about the time I was thinking I would have to return to my cell I heard laughter coming from one of the back rooms off to my right, so I headed back there.

When I entered the room, the first thing I saw was a red and white patchwork quilt tacked up on the wooden lockers. I could tell that there were little figures and words drawn on each square, but not much else—my eyesight is poor beyond eight feet or so. There were also two six— foot—long collapsible tables that most of our Buddhist group were seated around. On these tables were a lot of colored pens and felt—tip pens, as well as wooden blocks and ink pads made for print stamping on cloth. Our three outside volunteers, who come on a regular basis, were also in the room. Each one had a wonderful smile and an easiness about them that says they are genuine and unconcerned about being in a room full of felons.

Jizo is a bodhisattva who travels through hell realms

helping to relieve the suffering of sentient beings.

It had been years since I was in a room with such an air of festival, not to mention laughing and compassionate women who let you know that they cared about you. I looked to Gechen, who is the Dharma teacher and leader of the volunteers, and asked, “What’s going on?” “Well,” she said, “we are making a ‘Jizo for Peace’ blanket.” Then she went on to explain that Jizo (pronounced Geezo) is a bodhisattva who travels through hell realms helping to relieve the suffering of sentient beings. (I pictured a person kind of like Saint Christopher who looks out for travelers.)

She told us that those at the Great Vow Monastery wanted to make 270,000 Jizos; one for each person who had died as a result of the two atomic bombs dropped on Japan. She further explained that the women’s Buddhist group at the Coffee Creek Prison in Oregon had produced more than 1,500 Jizos on their quilt which was hanging on the wooden lockers. Then she made it a challenge to us men to see if we could better the count on our quilt.

At this point I was a little overwhelmed. I had only been in the main population of the prison for a little over a month after having served three years in maximum security lockup. I was suffering from sensory overload and a bit of paranoia at having been tossed into a population of 2,000 men from a population of just fifteen men. I realized though that these people were safe, compassionate, and doing something to benefit the world, they were showing love and compassion to a people we didn’t personally know, but who could benefit by our act of loving—kindness. It was then told to us that one of the mayors of the two cities bombed had already agreed to accept the quilts that we and others had done on the date commemorating those deaths. That was enough for me. With a big smile on my face and seeing the hope in my Dharma teacher’s eyes that I would overlook that macho stigmatism of being a man involved in quilt making, I said, “What do I need to do?”

Gechen then had me sit at one end of the fold—up table, laid a template down and then a square of white linen over that. The template shown through the cloth and was made of paper. There were black borders to guide us where to draw in order to be able to sew the squares into a quilt. Gechen said we could draw pictures of Jizos or use the wooden blocks and stamp them on.

I centered my piece of cloth on its template and then looked around the room. At my left was a lifer named Pollock. He has been in for over twenty years straight. He joined the Buddhist group four years back. I had met him in the “hole” (segregation unit) after he had OD’ed on heroin. He had been the first to pique my interest in Buddhism and I liked him. He was busy drawing and smiling like a little kid. To my right was Gechen and she was also busy ruling a line on her border and snatching colored pens as fast as she could draw, set one down and pick another up—you could tell she had done this before.

At the opposite end of the table facing me was Betty. She wasn’t drawing but she was smiling big, watching all of the others draw and giving off good vibes.

The second table sat a few feet from ours, and it was full of guys drawing and talking while they worked. Our third volunteer, named Keesay, is the jokester of our volunteer group, and is always laughing and smiling. Her eyes have that twinkle that says she is a happy person and more times than not, she will stick her tongue out in a good—natured way, kind of like saying “life is good, share it with us.” She is a cancer survivor and you could tell her nature was filled with happiness. She was also the seamstress and headed up her part of the quilt endeavor.

Everyone seemed to be involved in the process at hand. So I sighed, let go of my apprehension and opened myself up to the experience. My first attempt at drawing Jizos freehand was a little stiff. My next one had me feeling the goodness of the project. One of the volunteers had said that lots of Jizos and the right intent was what was important here, especially towards women and children. I suppose if Bodhisattva Jizo was all I thought he was, he looked out for women and children the most. He might even be a bodhisattva that was a “she” if the kindness and compassion of our volunteers were any kind of gauge of that sort of being.

Once or twice I found my attention to the task wander as I drew and stamped out Jizos, but like meditation I would bring my awareness back with right intent as I would to my breath. I found I could actually relax and enjoy this occasion, this experience infused with the Dharma. I also felt as if I were doing something positive, something healing, not only for myself but for others as well.

Before I knew it I had completed my fourth square of linen with seventy—one red and black Jizos on it. We had outdone the women’s count, but I didn’t feel that it was a contest between genders. Indeed we had women working right alongside of us. Rather, I felt it a process of healing and of cooperation, a peaceful working together to complete an honorable task.

As we filed out of the chapel after putting things away and saying our goodnights, I walked slowly down the corridor that I had run up two hours previously. The little girl I had remembered from that long—ago picture in Life magazine came back to me. Finally someone had made an effort to take away her pain, to ask forgiveness, and to cover her nakedness. It was a group effort made by strangers— some who would never meet in this life, for our contribution was only a small part of the 270,000 Jizos needed. But that was okay; there was loving—kindness in the task.

Leighton Bates

5.57.    Doing Well Whatever the Circumstance

There was an old man living alone in Idaho. He wanted to dig a potato garden, but it was too hard. His son, Bubba, often helped him, but Bubba is now in prison. The father wrote this letter saying his predicament was as follows:

Dear Bubba,

I am so weak that I can’t grow potatoes this year. I’m too old to dig the garden. If you hadn’t gone to jail then

there would be no problem, you could dig for me.

Love you,

Dad

 Bubba’s response:

Dad, please don’t dig up potato garden. That’s where

I buried the dead body. Please do not touch, I love you!

Love,

Bubba

 

At 4 a.m. the next morning, police officers dug through the vast garden without missing anyplace but no body was found. They apologized to the old man and left. On the same day, the old man received another letter from his son:

“Dad, keep planting your garden. This was the one thing I can do for you.”

Loving Dad,

Bubba

5.58.                             Life Prisoners Offer Scholarships

According to the Associated Press:²¹ A group of prisoners sent scholarships to a nineteen—year—old boy whose younger sister was killed. The news was released at 7:25 a.m. June 7, 2005.

In Raleigh, North Carolian, Zach Osborne remembers

21. “Life Prisoners Offer Scholarships to the Relatives of Victims” by

the memories of his little sister all his life. Osborne was a six—year—old boy who had a four—year—old sister who was raped and killed. Their mother’s boyfriend did this and was imprisoned. Because of this, Osborne desired to grow up to be a police officer. Osborne is now a second—year student at the University of East Carolina with financial aid from a number of life prisoners.

On Tuesday, 19, Osborne received $5,000 from some inmates for publishing the bi—monthly Compassion. Calculating funding so far, the prisoners have given Osborne seven scholarships worth $27,000.

Dennis Skillicorn, a homicide criminal in Missouri, was the editor of the newspaper. He wrote “Our intent is genuine. We want to support him fulfilling the police’s dream to find a way to prevent future violence.”

Osborne’s sister Natalie was killed at Asheboro in April 1992. The culprit was Jeff Kandies, who was sentenced to life imprisonment in North Carolina.

Osborne said: “This life experience will be the motivation for me to solve more cases or put in more effort. The painful loss of my family is the motivation that I will try to prevent events from happening in other families.”

To achieve this scholarship, Osborne must write an essay on crime and its consequences for Osborne and his family. In addition to Osborne, there are others who received awards such as Brandon Biggs, who was hit by a car in Fort Worth, Texas, in 2001.

Zach Osborne

Zach Osborn. http://www.thubtenchodron.org/PrisonDharma/scholar- ship_from_death_row_prisoners.html

5.59.    Change in the Prison World

My practice started with many tears, especially reflecting on regret. The more I practice meditation every day, the more I realize there are still things that continue to upset me. While I prefer to hide in meditation, there are a number of opportunities like college courses and night programs that keep me a little busy.

During these activities, my mind wandered aimlessly, my unpleasant delusion arose when I encountered other attitudes and prejudices. Recalling the words of the Buddha’s teachings, I went into the flow of my mind. I meditate every morning and night. I also chant at every lunch, break, and even while waiting in line to receive food or attendance. Thanks to the guidance of Venerable Giới Hương and other monastic chaplains, I have been constantly mindful with efforts to make a difference in this prison world.

Cadence

5.60.                          Every Phenomena Has Its Cause

Dear Sư cô,

I am only thirty years old, and I have lived a complicated life filled with dishonesty, violence, drugs, and criminal activity. My choices took a toll on my body, bringing me to a point where I could hardly continue, had I not encountered Buddhism.

At that time, I was so deep in suffering that I did not perceive anything around me. I was overwhelmed by a cloud of anger, hatred, confusion, and self—pity. Prison staff watched over me carefully for fear I would attempt suicide. At the request of the prison guards, I was moved to live with other prisoners and so I was transferred to Dodge Correctional Institution, Dodge, Wisconsin.

There, a prisoner named Brodwin treated me very well and seemed to see through my screen. He saw that I had lost my wife, children, property, and I needed love to rely on. Not only Brodwin but also some of Brodwin’s friends are very knowledgeable. I do not understand what makes me admire these prisoners. Maybe their upbeat spirits. I’m glad to have met these positive people and to call them my friends. Later, I knew what appealed to me was their personality because they were a very sincere group of Buddhist practitioners. It’s no surprise that they have a different mindset from typical prisoners.

I studied in some churches but did not study any Eastern religions. I listened to the lectures of these people and realized I could learn something from them. When I practiced being a Buddhist, I felt better. That’s the way to escape suffering. What I need is what constantly appears before my eyes: the path to escape suffering. It’s simple! It’s complete! That’s very wonderful! After I practiced, I knew I found what I was looking for in my life. Actually, what I sought was to find me.

The New Year has come and although away from home, I try to do better. My friends held me in their arms. I have nothing and they share what they have with us. They gave me presents and Christmas cards. Most importantly, they gave me true companionship, understanding and love. They gave me a lot of surprises I had wonderful days at the correctional center.

The important thing is that this experience has opened my eyes to the truth that the path out of suffering is one I am now walking. Instead of living with negative emotions, I focus on cultivating inner peace and developing the kindness within me. I have taken refuge and embraced Buddhism.

The Triple Gem is the place to save my life. I thank my fellow Buddhist believers for what they have given me and my family. Thanks to the supporters for sharing the Dharma program in prison. Thank you, Venerable Giới Hương—the embodiment of the Bodhisattva for helping us to practice compassion even in the most difficult circumstances. Just know that these things made me change. Buddhism not only changed my life but also gave me life.

Mason

5.61.                                                                                Regret

Dear Teacher Giới Hương,

I have made a vow that in the future that I will be useful to those who have been abused or raped by me. While doing this, I pray that they are doing good deeds and are happy and at peace. I also pray that the person I killed will be lucky in the next rebirth and his family will still rise despite his absence.

I look at the past and see my bad deeds. I am really

ashamed and regret the suffering I have caused. I also think about the animals that I harmed, the insults or aggressive actions that caused pain for others. Sometimes the memories of these events arise. I see how much I was ignorant and full of sin.

But I still hope I have the good potential that Buddhism calls the inherent Buddha nature of all beings. I will act with kindness. I will think of others before me. I will comfort and rescue injured animals. I will say good and kind words to others. This is a start. Anyway, I’m not a saint, but I’ll try to do good. What I can do is stay healthy and remain alert to avoid evil. I am practicing this. I continue to pray for the people I harmed and promise to improve.

Jordan

5.62.    Challenges of the Positive Vow

After reading Buddhist books recommending vegetarianism, I am trying to change and practice this throughout this week of Thanksgiving.

One day, I heard from a guard that a prisoner here had long been a vegetarian and was in solitary confinement like me. At one point, the prison ran out of vegetarian food, and the guards asked him either to be hungry or to eat grilled chicken. He decided not to eat.

After listening to the story, I gave him some vegetarian soup and candy saying, “Don’t ask who this soup is for. I’m just worried you’re hungry.”

A few days later, the person said, “Thank you, this is the kindest thing anyone has done for me in the past three years.”

I never thought that I had done anything meaningful to help this prisoner, but I saw how important it is to pay attention and help others maintain goodwill in prison. Especially the vow of vegetarianism in the middle of this food shortage—it shines like a bright star in the night!

Jackson

5.63.                                                                                  Lucky

Dear Teacher Giới Hương,

Snow poured down all over the yard again. We deeply appreciate the kindness of you and Ven. Tonen who have traveled the dangerous and cold snowy road to get here. With gratitude for your efforts, we tried to invite more new inmates to join our practice plan,

During the talk, we were happy to hear your praise. You also likened us to children celebrating Christmas, dressed in colorful sweaters, scarves, and socks. We will try to improve and live up to the worth you see in us.

Tojin

Kettle Moraine Correctional Institution, Wisconsin

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương visited the inmate Nguyễn Sơn (Viên Bảo Phúc) and other Vietnamese prisoners in Northern California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation on March 2, 2013.

                                                                ***********  

Chapter 6

THE SUPPORT OF DHARMA

6.1.           Conversation Between Chaplain Joseph

C

Baker and Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

Chaplain Joseph Baker of Green Bay Correctional Institution said that he went to Vietnam ten years

ago and he loved the small and friendly country. He was happy to see me joining the Milwaukee Zen Center with Venerable Tonen in a teaching program to guide prisoners, exchanging correspondence and giving Buddhist books to jail libraries and prisoners.

Through the articles in the Sōsaku newsletter, Chaplain Joseph Baker recognized that the inmates’ understanding of Buddhism at Green Bay Correctional Institution reflected their comprehension of moral principles and the application of spiritual life within the prison’s activities. This is a significant effort by the prisoners to create peace and harmony in the prison environment. He thanked the Venerable Nuns for their dedicated work in creating this valuable opportunity. The Dharma is the path to awakening and seeing the world as it truly is. Actions aligned with this understanding are freed from the flames of greed, hatred, ignorance, and imprisonment.

Joseph Baker asked me (Venerable T.N. Giới Hương): Why am I so excited about participating in the program to help prisoners?

I answered: The main motive is compassion for both the victims and the criminals who are all suffering. Dharma offers a way out of suffering as experienced by the Buddha. Seeing the Buddha’s teachings in the prisons conducted by the Milwaukee Zen Center is one of the most effective ways of spreading the message, which is why I would like to participate. We will all benefit if the prisoners are open to learning and show a willingness to change. The cycle of repeated recidivism serves as proof that punishment alone is not effective.

According to a Sentencing Project Report, the United States has the highest prison population in the world. The Associated Press reported on June 30, 2005, that one in every 136 Americans is in prison (it is unbelievable). Many individuals, scholars, and leaders from various religions in the United States have been working to address this issue by introducing the philosophy and values of their faiths in the prison systems.

Our intention is not to persuade prisoners to abandon their faith. When inmates wish to learn about meditation, loving—kindness, compassion, joy, or other aspects of Buddhism through correspondence, we respond by providing Buddhist books, offering friendship, and exchanging Dharma teachings through letters. If they want to organize meditation sessions, chant the Buddha’s name, or recite sutras, we visit the prison (pastoral visits) to guide them, either individually or in groups so they can practice in the challenging and often conflicting prison environment. Although prisoners may have accumulated negative karma, causing harm or pain to others, their inherent nature is good, and they are eager to learn positive teachings if we can help awaken their Buddhist potential. With this hope, we are committed to being here for them.

Although Wisconsin Correctional Institutions are spread across the state and some are a three to four—hour drive, Venerable Tonen and I are always happy to make the journey. Despite the long drive, there were times when only three or four people attended the sessions, but we could see that these prisoners truly needed Buddhism and patiently awaited our visits each month. Interestingly, while some people outside the prison system may lack earnest motivation to practice, these inmates show a strong commitment to their spiritual journey.

I recall a pleasant, sunny afternoon in New Lisbon, sitting in a circle with ten prisoners. They were tall, muscular Americans, while I, as the guide, have a small Asian frame. Kenvin jokingly remarked that I looked more like a little girl than a forty—five—year—old abbess. The chaplain sat with us, listening attentively to our Dharma talk. I shared the story of Hui Neng’s life and enlightenment, as told in the Platform Sutra of the Sixth Patriarch. I explained that the nature of the mind is pure, and liberation comes from freeing ourselves from disturbing emotions. Delusions are like clouds obscuring our minds. I also spoke about kindness, forgiveness, patience, and tolerance. Beneath the negative aspects of the prisoners, such as frustration, anger, sadness, crime, and hatred lie the positive qualities of altruism, joy, goodness, tranquility, and awareness, waiting for the right conditions to manifest.

During the Dharma talks, one prisoner asked why I was ordained so young, at just fifteen, and gave up my dreams to live in a monastery. In the United States, it is common for people to first fulfill their social duties—such as working, having a family (husband, wife, children), and then, when they reach old age, consider renunciation (if they choose to). This often leads to a semi—ordained life. The prisoner also asked how I, dressed in the nun’s attire (yellow robe and round headpiece), entered the prison, and how the American public views such an image.

I responded: There are two types of renunciation in the Buddhist tradition: the young nun (ordained in childhood) and the semi—lifetime nun (who is married before entering the monastery). Both paths are praiseworthy. However, if you become a nun from a young age, you are more deeply immersed in Buddhist teachings, and your ability to spread them becomes more effective, as you have more time to practice the Dharma with a pure and innocent heart. On the other hand, when someone becomes a nun in middle age, like Venerable Tonen, and exerts great effort and dedication, as she has in her work within the prison and at the Milwaukee Zen Center, it is highly respected and brings immeasurable merit. Ultimately, whether young or middle—aged, the self—purification and benefit to others that renunciants achieve is valuable and worthy of respect.

When we wear religious robes into the correctional institutions, some of the prisoners, unfamiliar with Buddhism, appear suspicious or found it strange. However, Buddhist prisoners greet us with respect, placing their hands together in a gesture of reverence. Many of the prison staff also welcomed us with smiles when they learned we were monastics. Prisons are highly structured environments, and many people mistakenly associate us with the volunteer lay people who regularly engage in good deeds within the facility. When they make this assumption, they focus less on gender and more on treating us according to the law, with the understanding that we, too, must follow the law as citizens. Overall, I believe Americans treat people equally, without giving special priority to monastics. They don’t seem to place much emphasis on form and ritual, but rather on the meaning and the relationships involved.

To maintain this long—term charitable work, we must adhere to the rules of the prison. We must show respect and courtesy toward the staff, the officers, and the chaplain. It is important not to think that it will be acceptable to bypass the rules, either by shortening the process to request permission or not following the procedures. All monthly permit documents must be clear and properly completed. In reality, if any issues arise, it is not us who will bear the consequences, but the prisoners who will have to face the repercussions.

Prison is a valuable place to practice committed Buddhism. It is an environment marked by difficult and abnormal living conditions, where compassion and spiritual teachings are essential to nurture the mind. Here, the inmates, alongside us, have the opportunity to meditate, chant, and recite the Buddha’s name, which is truly a beautiful experience.

I remember visiting Racine Prison once. The chaplain came out to greet Venerable Tonen and me, and we made our way to the chapel. We passed through two security ID checks and had a white stamp placed on our hands. We then went through several large iron doors, walked past the library and the prison cells, and finally reached the chapel. Some inmates had prepared a Buddhist altar and arranged cushions in a circle. The group was diverse— some had brown hair, some were Asian, others were African, spanning a range of ages from young to middle— aged to elderly. Some were tall, others short, but all were muscular and strong. They wore blue uniforms with the word “inmate” printed on their backs. We greeted each other and sat down in silence. I will never forget that group of dedicated individuals, practicing in the darkness, with their gentle, polite, and humble demeanor.

After sitting meditation, we held a discussion. Many inmates asked about the meaning of the Buddha’s teachings and how they could help them face the challenges of their daily lives. One inmate described the dangerous and tense atmosphere of having armed strangers wearing masks, with guns mounted on the ceiling, while they played in the yard. I asked them how such a situation affected them. Naturally, it had a significant impact. On a very hot day, it was a welcome relief to be allowed out into the yard by a prison guard. One man was playing cards with another inmate, and after losing, they quarreled, which led to one killing the other when no one was around to stop it. The man was simply a human being, playing cards and hoping to win. But as a loser, he couldn’t handle the frustration and used a knife to end the winner’s life. Such is the tragic reality of the prison world.

As we were about to leave the chapel, I glanced at my seat, marked by a cross and the word “prison” on the back of the chair. Prison is a truly difficult place to live, filled with jealousy, fear, and harm between inmates. However, today, eight prisoners had studied the Buddha’s teachings and were purifying their karma through prostrations and meditation. They have formed a Buddhist community, and I hope this group of Buddhist inmates will bring light to the prison’s atmosphere every day.

 

Venerable T.N. Giới Hương

6.2.    Those Seek Religion

September 4, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

Although I’ve only known Buddhism for a short time, I’ve been practicing with my friends in prison, and I can see changes in myself that I didn’t even realize were happening. In the past, I explored several other religions, mostly Christianity, as it is my family’s faith, but not my own. Despite trying repeatedly and attending church many times, I never understood the meaning of this religion. I asked myself several times why I chose to practice Buddhism. The answer is that I needed to start changing my life and recognize the control I have, just like everyone else, over my own actions. With Buddhism, I found something that made sense to me and something I truly enjoy practicing. I wish the best to everyone who is searching for a path in religion.

Kowach

6.3.    Entering the Prison

Dear Sư cô,

The growing number of prisons in the US due to the rising inmate population is not a positive sign. However, it is comforting to witness the strong efforts of religious organizations involved in prison volunteering, which have brought many benefits to the prisoners. In particular, Buddhist teachings and practices have found a meaningful place within the dark corners of the prison system.

I know there are many Buddhist prisoners practicing compassion, even when in solitary confinement, dedicating their merit to fellow inmates or prison staff surrounded by cruelty and violence. Many turn to the Three Jewels of Refuge or contemplate the Four Noble Truths to protect themselves, helping them endure the harsh conditions of death sentences or years spent in solitary confinement with little to occupy their time. The call for spiritual study among prisoners has become even more pressing. When an inmate truly understands the Dharma, their spiritual life begins to blossom like a flower.

Amanda

6.4.    My Mind, My Name

August 8, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

I really admire Thích Nhất Hạnh’s poem, “Please Call Me by My True Names.” I believe that all the roles and titles I hold in life—whether as a son, grandchild, brother, relative, friend, student, news vendor, football player, graduate, boyfriend, lover, cook, tutor, driver, dishwasher, mentor, soldier, carpenter, writer, failure, plaintiff, prisoner, murderer, Buddhist follower, builder, artist, painter, or Bodhisattva—are simply labels or trademarks. The true essence behind these labels remains the same because, in the end, when we lie down, we all share the same fundamental nature of the four elements (earth, water, fire, and air), and these labels will vanish, carried away by the wind.

This made me think about all the education, training, skills, personal connections, time, and effort that went into acquiring each of these titles. When I think about both the positive and negative labels, I consider all the ignorance, anger, and fears that may arise from these identities. After listing the professions or careers related to this ego and looking back on my relatively short life, I had an awakening. I see my mind with all phenomena: good and bad, relative, and absolute—as infinitely capable.

It all stems from mind. This reminds me of the powerful teaching from Avatamsaka Sutra: “If you want to clearly understand the mind, reflect on the three generations of Buddhas and contemplate that the nature of all phenomena is created by the mind.” The Buddha also expressed a similar idea in the Dhammapada:

1. Mind precedes all mental Mind is their chief; they are all mind—wrought. If with an impure mind a person speaks or acts, suffering follows him like the wheel

that follows the foot of the ox.

2. Mind precedes all mental Mind is their chief; they are all mind—wrought. If with a pure mind a person speaks or acts happiness follows him like his never— departing shadow²²

Understanding this, we must recognize our ability to change the mind. We have the power to choose the labels we embrace, rather than allowing external circumstances to define us or dictate the names we are given.

Tojin

6.5.    The Miraculous Buddha’s Teaching

December 27, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

Before I met the Buddha Dharma, I was drowning in a stupor and a lie. My heart was full of resentment and hatred. It is no exaggeration to say that the Dharma has changed my soul. The teachings of the Buddha have been the catalyst that changed my thoughts and actions. Before, I followed whatever was convenient or aligned with my beliefs and desires, even though sometimes I sensed it was wrong. In fact, when I was young, I rarely understood what was right or wrong. I believed that as long as something benefited my group, it was acceptable, even if it harmed others, which led me into bad company and associations with harmful people.

22. Verse 1 and 2. Translated into English by Thích Minh Châu. http://www.buddhanet.net/e—learning/buddhism/dp01.htm

Ms. Helene

 6.6.    Craving

Dear Sư cô,

It seems there is a natural confusion that occurs when we begin to crave people or things, believing they are essential to our lives. For me, I have realized that I need to let go of my thoughts and feelings in order to free myself from attachment.

Grasping onto the Dharma or people often means viewing them as sources of everlasting happiness and seeing them as permanent fixtures in our lives. For example, when we fall in love with someone, we may imagine that person is perfect, beautiful and that we must be with them to be happy. We feel intense desire for them, and if we don’t see them, we experience longing and sadness.

However, once we live with them, we begin to see that they are not as perfect as we once believed, and the affection fades, leading to unhappiness. We continue to struggle with dissatisfaction until we start a new cycle— divorcing and seeking love from another person, only to create more suffering in the process.

When we are liberated from craving, the second problem is taking external phenomena as giving us eternal happiness. For example, we believe that if we have money, we will pay off our bills and buy whatever we want. But we don’t have the long—term happiness we think. We spend a lot of time worrying about how to have more money, which increases our greed.

We may become paranoid, thinking that our friends only like us for our money, believing we can buy their affection to alleviate our loneliness. But eventually, we realize that they were never truly our friends, and this realization leaves us feeling even more isolated than before. Whether we seek fulfillment through people or material things, attachment only leads to disappointment, as none of these external sources can ever bring us lasting happiness.

The third problem arises when we perceive things as permanent and unchanging. We fall into the great delusion that these attachments bring happiness, but in reality, they only bring pain. For instance, with life and death, we may believe that our existence begins with birth and ends with death, and in between we deceive ourselves. In our youth, we feel invincible and timeless. Even as we age, we continue to tell ourselves, “I still feel like I’m eighteen.” We assume we can do the same things at sixty that we did at twenty. But the truth is we change and if we fail to recognize that everything is impermanent, we may wake up one day to find ourselves overwhelmed by suffering, enduring it from morning until night.

We don’t need to suppress our feelings or emotions. What we need is to awaken to things as they truly are. Once we do this, we will experience clarity and true happiness.

The Buddha express this doctrine in the Dhammapada,

Verse 340:

“The stream of craving flows towards all sense objects; the creeper of craving arises (at the six sense—doors) and fixes itself (on the six sense—objects). Seeing that creeper

of craving growing, cut off its roots with Magga Insight.”²³

If we stop applying misguided concepts to phenomena, and cease believing that people, money, or external things will bring us happiness, we will no longer hope for them to act in ways that fulfill us. When we see things in their true nature and accept the Dharma as it is, we will be free from craving. We can still love with others and bring them happiness, without allowing things to bring us suffering.

Another way to achieve this is through meditation, contemplating the impermanence of all things, and awakening to the constant changes around us. Instead of being trapped in the cloud of suffering we create, we can ride the waves of existence. When we see a beggar and see them as family, we cultivate compassion and release selfishness and ego. Similarly, when we pay off debts or give money to strangers to buy warm clothes in winter, both actions foster the same compassionate feelings. Once we look beyond our physical bodies and understand that life and death are timeless, we attain this awakening. The Buddha said:

“Knowing this, the wise man, who is the disciple of the Buddha, does not find delight even in the pleasures of the devas, but rejoices in the cessation of craving [Nirvana].” (Dhammapada, Verse 187).²⁴

John

23. Dhammapada, Verse Ven. Thích Minh Châu translated into En- glish. Vietnamese Buddhist Research Institute. 1994. Việt Nam. http:// www.buddhismtoday.com/viet/kinh/pali/phapcu1.htm
24. Dhammapada, Verse Ven. Thích Minh Châu translated into En- glish. Vietnamese Buddhist Research Institute. 1994. Việt Nam. http:// www.buddhismtoday.com/viet/kinh/pali/phapcu1.htm

6.7.    Ignorance and Anger

Dear Sư cô,

Ignorance is the source of all disasters as revealed in the Buddhist teachings. Escape from ignorance is wisdom, and with wisdom, ignorance is dispelled. When we act out of anger, ignorance arises. By cultivating wisdom and dispelling ignorance, no suffering can take hold. Therefore, ignorance is the source of all greed, hatred, anger, and jealousy because it is fueled by ignorance, a lack of awareness. If we are not angry, it does not arise.

Every obstacle or sorrow has an antidote, and that antidote is the Buddha’s teachings. For example, when someone impolite broke in line ahead of me, I didn’t become angry. Why? Because I understand that they do not want to harm me, and I have no reason to be upset. Perhaps they were hungry, impatient or simply joining the line. I have no direct stake in it, but I can reflect on the possible cause—and—effect relationship between us. It’s possible that in a past life, I had once interrupted them, and this situation is the result of that past karma. By quietly accepting their action, I allow that karmic cycle to come to an end. However, if I react negatively, I will prolong the cycle and create new negative causes that will result in future consequences.

Intolerance is not a good habit. When we are intolerant of others, we are also being intolerant of ourselves. What happens if another prisoner doesn’t behave the way we do? Are we perfect people? Of course not. As soon as we cultivate thoughts of others without generosity, patience, charity, compassion, and equality, we become the ones who are imperfect. How should we evaluate attitudes that criticize others? In truth, we do not really recognize the Buddha or the Bodhisattva if they do not appear before our eyes in their perfect form. We cannot recognize them if they do not manifest in the same earthly form as us, whether animals or humans.

Thus, a holy teacher arose in a form we could recognize, whether as an animal or ordinary person, and we did not immediately know who they were. They guide us in learning patience and compassion, tolerance, and acceptance. This is a good thing to remember when we come into contact with other sentient beings. They are all our teachers. They provide us with the opportunity to learn, develop, evolve and strive towards perfection.

We should see all others as Buddhas, Bodhisattvas, as masters who give us golden opportunities to practice and develop. I also reflect on all beings as having been my mother, as we have been reborn countless times. Perhaps the beings we meet have been our mothers in past lives. We should not treat anyone badly. We should love them and not harm them. If we can interact with others with the understanding that they are, or have been, our beloved ones it becomes much easier to treat them with kindness. When we remember the kindness of our parents, family, and friends in this life, it is easy for us to treat others with kindness in the present moment. Anyway, this is something that I’m practicing.

When a person speaks disrespectfully to me, first I remain calm, serene, and sincere, aiming to transform their anger and other negative emotions. I make an effort to show respect towards them and refrain from generating any evil thoughts. Secondly, I really wish them to feel good about themselves and others in order to eliminate and reduce their suffering. Even if they don’t realize that their words or actions have troubled me or others, I sense I may have upset them, and I am willing to make an apology. I will help cool their anger and bring them calm. My goal is to reduce their anger and prevent them from engaging in actions that could cause more suffering. In the end, this approach helps prevent many harmful outcomes.

Susan

6.8.    Keeping Balance

Dear Sư cô,

When life has no direction, it becomes a deadly trap. This is the trap I collapsed into, and I want to escape from that grip (although it seems I have only just managed to lift my foot to escape).

When my mind became concentrated and calm, my ego faded away. I began to see that most of my activity was driven by my bad habits. I realized very little of what I did was selfless or even beneficial to myself, so I started to address my bad temper and aimless activities until one day I found myself with nothing left—no gains or losses. Almost every activity seemed meaningless, harmful, and life itself felt completely empty. I became bored with my days and hours. Many nights I struggled constantly to stay clear headed as my mind was overwhelmed with frustration and boredom, while my head ached, like a sharp pain in my heart.

Sometimes I felt so bad that I had to lie down on the bed curled up in a ball, gritting my teeth to endure the pain, until finally falling asleep at midnight. I sometimes don’t care about life even if I’m released or alive. Nothing makes sense anymore. I don’t care if I get letters from family or friends. I want to keep myself positive and avoid any conversation and basically, I hope to come to an end.

A young Western man was traveling throughout Southeast Asia (this story comes from Ajahn Munindo’s book, The Gift of Well—Being). He wanted to find a teacher and decided to seek out famous masters. One after another, he consulted various teachers. When he met each one, he asked the same question: “What did the Buddha realize under the Bodhi tree?” I imagined him gathering all the answers before he decided to choose a master. Each teacher answered according to their perspective. First, a Japanese teacher in Bodhgaya answered: “The Buddha is meditating.” Then another guru answered: “Buddha is contemplating selflessness.” Another guru replied, “The Buddha is calm.” Another master: “Buddha is practicing insight knowledge.”

When this person arrived in Thailand and asked a Zen master a similar question, the Zen master responded, “Wherever the Buddha goes, he is under the Bodhi tree. The Bodhi tree symbolizes right view.”

This story helped open my narrow mind, like “a frog sitting at the bottom of a well” and I realized the importance of right understanding. I also realized that I was grasping the concept of enlightenment, and it was suffocating me. Letting go of that attachment, I realized that meditation alone is not enough to get rid of suffering and sorrow. Life doesn’t automatically become simpler or happier just through meditation nor does it naturally turn us into compassionate, virtuous people. Many other qualities are needed.

Cultivating awakening and wisdom through meditation is very beneficial. It is the first step in overcoming our afflictions, as we must be able to see them clearly. The next step is to practice compassion and kindness, which has been the most difficult part of my practice, especially since I have focused so much on myself throughout my life.

Peppers

 6.9.    Convert

Dear Sư cô,

For many years, I worked in the hospice program of the prison, or in the school, where I taught GED²⁵ classes and led meditation groups in the chapel. I saw so many prisoners surrender, leaving themselves drifting with despair, boredom, and sometimes suicide. There were also a few prisoners who went looking for punishment or became insane, unable to find light and the future beyond the prison.

I am deeply grateful that I did not surrender to this despair, but found a solution through meditation, and used

25. GED: General Education Development equivalent to grade 12. The General Educational Development (GED) tests are a group of four sub- ject tests which, when passed, provide certification that the test taker has United States or Canadian high school—level academic skills. Pearson is the sole developer for the GED test. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ General_Educational_Development

this means to overcome sorrow and turned it into pleasure, which could be called magic. I hope other inmates, on their way to finding answers, will also find the power to transform here.

Diana

 6.10.    Free

Dear Teacher,

Our greatest hope is to help prisoners become more compassionate, caring people, despite the adversities they face. Since prisoners come from diverse religious backgrounds, the focus here is on those who have not yet embraced Buddhism. However, anyone with an open mind, willing or unwilling to become a Buddhist, will find valuable insights and practices here that can help cultivate spiritual qualities and alleviate suffering in any circumstance.

There are inmates here who are trying to improve their dignity, values, thoughts, language, and emotions. Many have begun to understand Buddhism as a way to enhance the meaning of life and a way to address the challenges of birth and death. Outside the walls of the prison, American Buddhism is looking for a specific path shaped by American perspectives and the current religious landscape. Prisoners, too, are engaging with others to seek alternative solutions due to dissatisfaction with or experiences in existing religions. American Buddhism has begun to respond to the questions and needs of prisoners seeking to learn what Buddhism can offer.

Some prisoners feel confined by their surroundings, while others experience a sense of freedom. Though physically incarcerated, these individuals have found liberation through meditation, cultivating compassion, and practicing Buddhist precepts. On the other hand, prison security officials may believe they are free because they live outside the prison walls, yet many remain trapped in their own way—stuck in monotonous jobs, consumed by doubt, and affected by violence. Similarly, those of us on the outside sometimes feel unfree, constrained by habits, fears, and impulses.

Andreas

6.11.                                Avoid Discussing Human Error

On August 29, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

The Buddhist precepts emphasize two key principles: not lying and not praising oneself. These are aspects of right speech, which is part of the Eightfold Path (the eight right practices). Right speech involves speaking the truth in a way that is harmless. When we talk about others’ mistakes, we often foster resentment. While the effects may not be immediate, they will eventually lead to suffering, and the consequences can be difficult to avoid.

Idle talk or gossip often leads to unrighteous speech. When we speak ill of others, discussing their flaws or personalities, it’s better to reflect on our own faults and character instead. I, too, have been guilty of this— criticizing the religions and practices of others, sometimes thinking they were hypocritical or lacking, while believing that our way was superior. This lack of mindfulness created confusion and disharmony between individuals and groups. Through learning from the Buddha, we come to understand silence as a form of wisdom, embodying the true essence of the Dharma.

My hope in writing this article is to become more aware and mindful of my own faults, and to cultivate a deeper awareness to avoid speaking in error.

Tojin

 6.12.    Secular

Dear Sư cô,

On the day I was transferred from Dodge Correctional Institution in Wisconsin to Green Bay Correctional Institution in Wisconsin, even though I was handcuffed, I was given the chance to step outside and breathe the fresh, cool air, which brought me a sense of comfort.

At that time, there were only two days left until Thanksgiving. My escort drove me through the suburbs and along many streets, passing theaters and food spots. We got stuck in traffic due to the holiday shopping rush, and we had to wait for a long time. Through the small window of the truck, I could see the outside world vividly. I watched as restaurants advertised special Thanksgiving dishes, stores displayed luxurious holiday outfits, and shiny cars passed by. The shops promoted great discounts on sale items. Everything seemed to spark my desires. I tried to gaze at it all, as if to briefly satisfy my cravings and deprivation.

I realize that I still cling. Even after studying Buddhism for about six months at Dodge Prison, I still yearned for things like a new video camera, a good cup of coffee, a private TV, and many friends to correspond with. In essence, I remain a worldly person, constantly driven by thirst and desire for various things. Talking about it alone does not quell the insatiable desire, nor have I yet grasped the concept of desirelessness or truly understanding when I have enough.

Jack

Green Bay Correctional Institution, Wisconsin

6.13.    Dharma Instrument

Prisoners often enjoy the idea of meditation. Sometimes, people who want to become Buddhists become interested in strange new objects (dharma instruments) in Buddhism such as incense boxes, Buddha images, robes, Buddhist bells and beads. These objects are only a small part of the practice. The more important part is mastering the Buddha’s teaching or meditation. The formula for this discovery is composed of three parts: regular practice of meditation, determination to uphold the precepts, and practice of compassion, opening the heart to all beings on this earth.

I cannot fully capture the personal experiences or emotions of prisoners awaiting capital punishment or those serving life without parole. Many of these individuals are confined in hellish conditions within supermax prisons—places of extreme control and isolation.

Several inmates have embraced Buddhism, becoming devout practitioners. Others focus on meditation from the perspective of different religious traditions, using these practices to reduce stress and aid in transforming their minds. The core teachings of Buddhism aim to help prisoners escape suffering and move towards liberation. Meditation, which involves observing the mind, is a practice that can be beneficial to anyone, regardless of religious background—whether Christian, Jewish, or Muslim. It shows that one doesn’t need to convert to Buddhism to learn and benefit from meditation. It can become a part of anyone’s life and a valuable way of living.

In correctional institutions, prisoners who wish to change or find peace often have to discover this path on their own. Once transformation begins within, external circumstances lose their dominant influence. For most prisoners, the entire process—from arrest and accusation to trial, conviction and first entering prison is a terrifying experience. It’s a humiliation and loss of dignity that brings fear, anger and a deep sense of helplessness. Everything is imposed upon you. You are completely isolated, with little opportunity to discuss what’s happening with anyone, except perhaps occasionally with a lawyer.

For first—time prisoners, the key question becomes: How does one stay alive psychologically, physically, and spiritually? How does one preserve dignity in a situation where human dignity is trampled? How does one maintain self—control when everything feels utterly helpless? Prison is a place of suffering, violence, riots, and hatred, but also a place of friendship, love, and faith. Although it isn’t entirely different from the outside world, life in prison is often harsher, more tense and much tougher.

Meditation is an effective way to relieve stress and a profound tool for transformation. When combined with Buddhist teachings and discipline, meditation can gradually lead to spiritual, emotional, and moral growth. Over time, it can become a vehicle for permanent change. However, there will always be obstacles and distractions caused by delusions. Sitting still is difficult, concentration is hard to maintain, and distractions often cloud the mind. Establishing a consistent practice each day can be challenging.

I was fortunate to have encountered and practiced Buddhism for more than ten years before being imprisoned. Meditation sometimes felt like a journey into a magical world. Regardless, when I entered prison, I was fortunate to have the tools of the Buddha Dharma to rely on.

Ansley

6.14.    Eager to See Results

Teacher, I feel empty, confused, and stagnant, as if I take one step forward but two steps back. For instance, during meditation, there are times I feel progress, but other times, it feels as though I’m overwhelmed by disturbing emotions. I wonder if I’m putting in too much effort or if I’m just stuck in one place. A part of me is always motivated, wanting to be sure of my intentions and not allowing others to interfere. Perhaps I’m anxious to see the results of my practice.

Nevertheless, I feel more hopeful about my life and surroundings. I am deeply grateful for the meditative guidance from Venerable Tonen and Venerable Giới Hương.

Samantha L.

6.15.    A Fellow Buddhist

March 1, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

I think a lot about how I became a Buddhist while in prison. I have been a Buddhist for many years, and I see this path extending through my entire life and across many lifetimes, until I eventually become a Buddha.

From my experiences and what I’ve learned, one thing is clear: practice is essential. Practice! Practice! Practice! Applying the philosophy and teachings of the Dharma has helped me gain insight into the nature of life and the relationships between people. Before embracing a spiritual life, my existence was constantly overshadowed by mysterious fears and a lack of responsibility in almost every aspect of my life.

I know there’s something missing within me, but I’m not sad as I search for the answers to my questions— questions I never thought to ask before. For much of my adult life, I enjoyed hanging out with friends, drinking, smoking, using drugs, and trying to fit in with my peers. I never took a moment to reflect on the deeper meaning of life or the rhythm of the future that awaited me. I think this is common among many young people. However, after being incarcerated for some time, I had a moment of realization. A phrase suddenly struck my heart: “Why have I become this shallow person?” It was at that moment that Buddhism provided the answers I was seeking. I began to memorize meditation mantras (koans) from Dajian Huineng, the Sixth Patriarch, and the Diamond Sutra, and I began to experience breakthroughs in my mind that took my understanding of life to another level.

Studying the Dharma has had a profound impact on me. One of the key reasons I’ve continued my Buddhist practice for so long is the impression left by Taking Refuge in the Three Jewels ceremony. The moment when I, alongside my fellow inmates, vowed to rely on the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha became a deep, inner return for me. The monastics guided me back to the Dharma, and the Dharma led me to the Buddha. Through the Buddha, I was able to look within myself and understand that the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha are one.

I often criticize myself for not doing enough to help others as the Buddha taught. Though it’s not easy being in this prison, I’ve still been able to help a few inmates improve. I’ve realized that without my guidance on Buddhism, some prisoners would be even worse off. On the one hand, I feel I’m on the right path, but on the other, I know I should do more than just talk ... especially with the stubbornness of some of the prisoners here, there’s much to correct and endless advice to give. But I vow to do more.

I once asked myself, “Why have I come this far?” The truth that followed was a complete acceptance of the facts of this existence. Some prisoners come to me for advice, or I approach to tell them to trust their instincts. I believe that everyone inherently knows what is right or wrong, but delusion and ignorance lead them astray. In daily life, we often rely on worldly thinking rather than on our own rationality to guide us. This realization has greatly helped me in offering advice to others here, especially in a prison where gang members hold power.

Is there really a past or future? Do we have any reason to ask? Is the past merely a fleeting memory? What is the future other than an imagined aspiration for tomorrow? All is nothingness in existence.

Tojin

6.16.                                                                               My Life

May 3, 2007

Dear Sư cô,

I want to share how Buddhism has transformed my life. I won’t get caught up in too many details, as the lives of all prisoners are largely the same. The circumstances we face are just that—circumstances. I view life as a deck of cards, where each of us draws a card when we are born. Each card represents a fate, and whether we choose our cards or not, they are dealt to us. Our responsibility is to use the cards for our own benefit. If we don’t work with these cards to become better people, we may stumble along the way and end up with a new card. Everyone has different challenges, but at the core, we all face a problem.

One reason I appreciate Buddhism is that it comes from a different culture, offering a whole new way of life. It was a refreshing change, allowing me to quickly improve my life, rather than wasting time searching for hidden secrets in ancient scriptures. Buddhism is personal—it’s up to you. It offers a key to overcoming difficulties and cultivating compassion. I believe in the concept of rebirth, which I see as the result of my karma. Now, I know how to cultivate kindness, create good karma, repay bad karma, and prepare myself for my next life. I don’t know how many cards I have left in my deck, but I look forward to what’s next.

Brian Locks

 6.17.    Awakening

Dear Sư cô,

Mindfulness practices are powerful tools that help prisoners confront themselves and develop self—control. Through this practice, prisoners learn to reflect and gradually transform negative thoughts and habits that dominate their lives. These practices empower prisoners to manage the chaos of prison life and cope with separation from family and incarceration.

More broadly, mindfulness practices, including insight meditation, are pathways to social change. Through vipassana, we can transform our attitudes, personalities, and beliefs. Practicing mindfulness enables us to connect with our emotions without being overwhelmed or controlled by them. Many crimes stem from being misled by extreme emotional reactions. The awakening that comes with mindfulness shows us that we always have a choice in how we respond to unexpected events. With insight, we can make wise judgments and act in ways that are more appropriate for the situation.

Many people report that meditation helps them feel balanced and awakened. It provides relief from dissatisfaction, anxiety, stress, and addiction, while also normalizing sleep patterns and alleviating the deep melancholy that many prisoners carry. Furthermore, meditation reduces disruptive behaviors, creates a safer atmosphere for both prisoners and staff, fosters a cleaner and more hygienic living environment and improves interactions between employees and prisoners.

Meditation sessions offer a safe, confidential space where prisoners can reflect on the negative habits that have shaped their lives. At the beginning of the retreat, all participants vow to uphold the precept of non—killing, ensuring safety, trust, and harmony within the group before the meditation teachings begin. Prisoners also commit to respecting one another’s privacy during the Dharma talks throughout the retreat, led by the monastics.

In the peaceful stillness of meditation, prisoners are encouraged to examine their emotions in a supportive, non—judgmental environment. Through this contemplation, the truth about their lives starts to emerge, and spiritual transformation begins. After each meditation session, there are discussions where prisoners can openly address issues related to prison life and challenges they may face after their release. These sessions allow them to learn new concepts and adopt better manners. Some volunteers may also be trained to guide religious ceremonies when the chaplain monastics are unavailable.

The religious fellowship shared by like—minded peers, alongside the support from the chaplain monastics, brings prisoners peace, self—awareness, relaxation, and spiritual growth. Prisoners are encouraged to release the image of themselves as victims and reclaim the strength that had been lost. They cultivate loving—kindness, tolerance, and new perspectives. This process helps them aspire to change their lives, guiding them toward greater self—control and a deeper level of inner growth. The truth of their lives begins to unfold before their eyes.

Steven

6.18.    Labels

Recently, after much reflection, I’ve come to the conclusion that I no longer want to label myself. I don’t consider myself a member of any particular religion or religious philosophy, nor do I identify as an atheist or someone with no religion. What I have is my own truth— the truth that I recognize when I experience it. If someone chooses to label me a Buddhist because I follow the five precepts and meditate, that is their perception, not mine.

While I don’t subscribe to religious organizations, I do believe in the human spirit. There is an indescribable force in our lives, often referred to as the soul or spirit. I believe religion is a sacred way of explaining that force.

Dharma, which aligns closely with Buddhist scriptures, resonates with my way of thinking. However, I don’t accept all beliefs or rituals; they are merely symbols of the deeper meaning behind phenomena. The concepts of impermanence and the noble pursuit of love are as fitting for me as my well—worn glove. Buddhism, meditation, reflection—these practices, along with the transformation of my mind and thoughts have changed me. Perhaps I have simply matured. Perhaps it is Buddhism, awakening, and meditation that have fueled my growth.

Impermanence is one of the unique Buddhist philosophies that has awakened me. It shifted my perspective in a logical way, and the philosophy of impermanence has become a guiding influence in my daily life. I’ve never claimed to be a perfect Buddhist, but I do remain loyal to Buddhist philosophy. It has transformed my life. I tell others that I don’t carry a Buddhist label— just call me a human being. I strive to be a good, true person until the very end of my days. The Dharma has guided me into becoming who I am, and it will continue to shape who I will become—a person who cares about the Buddha’s teachings and is always ready to help others.

Charles

6.19.    Friendship

The Buddha taught that choosing friends wisely is crucial. A harmful friend is not necessarily someone with a bad appearance, but often a person who seems friendly yet encourages unethical behavior. They may claim to want what’s best for us, but their desire is rooted in selfishness. While they may appear kind, their influence can lead us down a path of self—indulgence.

In prison, I’ve had such friends—prisoners who seemed to be living carefree, enjoying fleeting moments of joy while drifting aimlessly. Now, I am focused on being a better person. I want to surround myself with

friends who share similar values—people who wish to see me grow into a happy, successful, and moral individual. But this is challenging, because when you try to be close to good people, the bad ones will often try to drag you down. They act as barriers, obstructing your progress. The prison environment is even more difficult than life outside, as there are many individuals here who will try to manipulate and control you if you let them.

I aspire to be a good person for the rest of my life. In the past and even now in prison, most people don’t truly care about my goals. They see me as a source of entertainment, as someone they can use to fulfill their desires, or as a way to gain status among other inmates. True friends, those who genuinely care for my well—being and encourage me to be a better person, are rare here. The small circle of friends and family I have now are the ones who stand by me, and I’ll stand by them until the end of our lives.

Reflecting on past mistakes, I realize that I placed too much trust in people I shouldn’t have. I hoped for more from them than they were capable of offering. In some instances, my trust in others led to disillusionment. Many of the people I believed in ended up betraying my trust. I take full responsibility for these misjudgments.

Through my time in prison, I’ve learned two fundamental, yet incredibly important lessons. First, the quality of friendship is worth far more than the quantity of acquaintances. A true friend is infinitely more valuable than a million people who are only around when they can benefit from you, for when you no longer serve their needs, they disappear.

Brandon

6.20.    Karma

Karma is a simple concept, yet it lies at the core of our actions, thoughts, and beliefs. Whether or not we become aware of its influence doesn’t change its presence. The cycle of cause and effect, good or bad, continues through the endless patterns of birth, aging, illness, and death.

We have the power to create positive outcomes. Positive thoughts and actions lead to happiness and favorable results. However, this is easier said than done. Looking at my own journey, from where I was to where I am now, it proves that change is possible. We can reshape our entire perspective on life, existence, and our place in this world. What I’ve realized is that the more I detach from the ego, the easier life becomes. The more I understand that the “self” isn’t at the center of everything, the more I desire to serve others for the benefit of all. What once seemed like a difficult task—helping others—has become a source of joy in my life. It’s a joy that inspires me to make a meaningful impact in the world, aligning with the wisdom of the 14th Dalai Lama, who said: “The purpose of life is to serve others.”

I would have killed myself that day if I hadn’t believed in the concept of rebirth. Now, I fear hell and nothing could be worse than the solitary confinement I am in. Rebirth signifies death, but not the end. Sitting here, consumed by fear, I had to face the consequences of my past.

One day, a prisoner approached me and asked, “Are you part of my gang?” I responded, “I’m not a henchman.” I went back to my room and took control of my life again.

I was tired of the mistakes I made when I was sixteen and twenty, and now I wanted to leave behind that negative, stagnant existence. Even being in solitary confinement felt like a significant change for someone like me, and now it seems to define my life.

Do I seek redemption? Am I sure about that? I don’t believe in the possibility of being saved. Do I see something sacred in the Buddha’s teachings? Not really. In truth, I don’t know what “sacred” even means. I’m just a twenty—year—old drug addict serving time for murder. Sacred or holy aren’t terms that fit into my mindset. My life has been filled with misery, and I don’t need to prove that to anyone. I know this from deep personal experience. This idea is the driving force in my life now. This is my form of transformation, and it’s why I choose to practice Buddhism every day, every moment. I practice because it feels natural, not because it’s something transcendent, and I can still practice even in this high—security prison.

Gabriel

6.21.    Solitary Confinement

Solitary confinement (administrative segregation) is like a trap, where you’re regarded as a person, but more for your financial worth than your inherent dignity. It’s a punishment, a direct result of breaking the law and causing harm to others.

When I was just sixteen, I caused pain to others. I was a drunk, a wanderer, unafraid of anyone or anything. I grew up with the contempt of those around me. By the time I was sixteen, I had already experienced so much pain inside me. I had reached a point where I felt it was

time to let the world see the weight of my suffering.

At eighteen, I entered prison with a hopeful attitude. Just two days in, I had a conversation with another prisoner who tried to convince me that, based on his experience, prison would be easier if I joined his gang. This decision, made in haste, not only kept me in prison, but it also led to me being placed in solitary confinement, a place where I experienced a level of suffering I could never have imagined. It took me over two years to fight my way out of that hellhole.

Now, at twenty, I find myself in solitary confinement again. Looking back on my life, it’s clear it’s been nothing but suffering. I’ve ruined my life to such an extent that I can barely remember it. I spent half my life drunk, leaving pain and destruction in my wake. I’m exhausted by the anger, the drugs, the constant arguments with my family and the murder trial that dragged my loved ones and the victim’s family through unimaginable pain. I don’t want to carry that past any longer. Looking ahead, the reality is clear: the rest of my life will be spent in prison. My heart and mind are weighed down by the intense suffering that has come to define my existence.

One day, a prisoner came to me and said: “Will you join my gang?” I replied: “I am not a lackey.” I went back to my room and got my life back. I was bored with the mistakes of my twenty—year—old life. Now I want to leave that boredom. Everything, even being put in solitary confinement seemed like a big change for a scumbag like me and now it seemed like it was my life.

Do I want to find a savior? Absolutely not! I don’t believe that possibility. Do I recognize something sacred in Buddha’s teachings? Not exactly. Actually, I don’t know what is sacred. I am a twenty—year—old drug addict who is in prison for murder. Sacred or holy was not in my mental vocabulary. A little painful life. I don’t need to point this out. I know from personal experience, deeper than anyone else. This is the idea of having a choice and that is the hook that pulls my life. This is an uplift for me and why I choose Buddhism to practice every day, every moment. I practice because this is a natural thing. There is nothing transcendent and I can practice even in this extreme prison world.

Anonymous

6.22.    It’s Their Fault

In the first verse of the Dhammapada, the Buddha taught:²⁶

“All mental phenomena have mind as their forerunner; they have mind as their chief; they are mind—made. If one speaks or acts with an evil mind, dukkha follows him just as the wheel follows the hoofprint of the ox that draws the cart.”

If you’re like me, this verse will make you pause and reflect. As I look back on the long journey of my life over the past twenty—seven years, I see the marks left by all the burdens I’ve carried.

26. Dhammapada, the first verse. Ven. Thích Minh Châu translated into Vietnamese Buddhist Research Institute. 1994. Việt Nam. http:// www.buddhismtoday.com/viet/kinh/pali/phapcu1.htm

As a child, I was burdened with anger, a bitterness I inherited from my family. Being short and overweight, I was often called names like “cart” or “pig.”

As I entered my youth, I believed my anger stemmed from inequality. I blamed my father and stepmother for everything. I resented them for the pain they caused and dismissed any efforts from others to help me. I felt as though the world couldn’t hear my cries.

In my teenage years, I began to direct my anger toward the authorities—the courts, prosecutors,   detectives, and everyone involved in the system. Their actions and accusations only fueled my resentment.

At twenty, my anger and destructive lifestyle were further fueled by a traumatic experience. While I was lying in bed, my roommate left the door open, and I was raped by another prisoner. This event became a painful catalyst for the anger I was already struggling with.

Anger was not the only weight that kept my life mired in darkness. Along with it came deep shame, disappointment, suffering and addiction, all of which dug me deeper into despair.

At this point in my life, Dharma arrived like a bitter medicine, but one I desperately needed. The Buddha’s teachings on forgiveness resonated deeply with me. If I wanted peace and happiness, I had to understand the power of saying “sorry.” This was the first step towards freeing myself from the cycle of pain.

For the first time, I offered an apology. It wasn’t easy. I struggled with the words and how to express them. From my solitary cell, during my monthly phone calls, I asked my sister for my stepmother’s address. When she asked why, I told her that I wanted to let my stepmother know that I had forgiven her.

Why would I apologize to someone who had hurt me? That was when I realized my stepmother had acted out of her own suffering. In her heart, she believed that her actions would end her own pain, not add to mine. She never intended to increase my suffering, but rather to reduce her own. What I needed to say was that I didn’t understand her pain. I am sorry that I didn’t help her end her suffering before I went to prison. I’m sorry for not taking action to prevent the karma I created. For years, I carried anger that I placed squarely on her.

Though I never fully spoke these words, I knew that day brought something more profound than simply saying sorry. I also sat with the spirit of my late father and apologized for not understanding his suffering. I didn’t realize that he had cancer and that like me, he was hurt by my anger. I told his spirit that I am sorry, and I will never bring up that pain again. The list of people I owe apologies to is long and difficult to count.

Finally, I sat with the person who had been my enemy, the one person I considered my true adversary, and said, “I’m sorry for the pain I’ve caused, and for the pain I’ve had to endure myself. Please forgive me.”

With all my heart, I vow to end the cycle of anger and greed in my life, and to instead cultivate love and compassion for all beings. At the very least, I will do this for myself.

Robert

6.23.    Read Between the Lines

Life is like a circle There is no next day What day is possible There was no yesterday Will it be no tomorrow? Hours without minutes

Is any moment without stretching? Read between the lines

To find the truth Very simple Very simple

Because it’s simple, we miss it every second. The sixth partriarch of the Chinese Zen lineage asked:

Where does the dust cling? Where do people stop?

What is a human being?

The snow winter on a warm sunny day. The sun set; the sun rose.

Clouds flying over the moon.

The summer wind

A sip of tea

A piece of cake

Do you take sweet sugar?

Like rivers, clouds, and oceans.

Dogen’s walk in the fog

Let it be all wet.

Sōsaku, tháng 5, 2007

Ryan Kelsheineir

6.24.    Challenging the Bodhisattva Vow

Dear Sư cô Giới Hương,

You asked why I ended up in solitary confinement. Here’s the situation. There’s a person here who has been trying to blackmail me. He lives in the same prison as I do. What does he want? He’s demanding $200 from me. He’s serving a life sentence and lives in despair, channeling his anger and frustration into violence, both toward himself and others. He’s the type of person they say is an “angry fish on the cutting board.”

I became his target because he knew I was a nonviolent Buddhist. In such a position, with no real way to defend myself, I approached him with mercy. I asked the prison guards to move me to solitary confinement to protect myself from his threats. So, though it may seem like a punishment, I voluntarily chose to be placed in isolation to avoid further harm. Yes, I was afraid of him, especially when he threatened to stab me, but I didn’t let those fears lead me toward revenge or violence. Instead, I practiced mindfulness and reflected on my emotions, something I had learned since becoming a Buddhist. In the past, I would have reacted with violence, but now, I was grateful for the precepts I had taken. They helped me avoid foolish reactions and allowed me to recognize the suffering that drives others to act violently. This experience in prison was a meaningful lesson for me.

There’s a story of a monk who went into the forest to meditate. One day, he encountered a tiger. Fear surged within him, and his instinct was to flee. But he realized he should not give in to that fear. He thought to himself, “It’s better to be eaten by the tiger than to live in fear. If I’ve created bad karma, the tiger will attack regardless. If not, it can do nothing to me.” The next time he saw the tiger, he sat still, refusing to run. The tiger simply looked at him and walked away. Over time, the monk mastered his fear of the tiger. Eventually, when the monk grew old, no one saw him again. Some wondered if the tiger had finally taken him, but what mattered was that he left this world peacefully, without fear or hatred toward the tiger.

Returning to my own story in prison, a month after being placed in solitary confinement, I was released and rejoined the rest of the inmates. The environment didn’t seem all that different from the isolation I had experienced. I realized that my own mindset had made the difference, not the external circumstances. The environment can be either good or bad; it’s how we choose to perceive it. If I see the environment as frightening, it will be frightening. But now that I’ve found some peace, I can live with other prisoners without fear, because I’ve learned to see them differently. People, whether good or bad, reflect my own

thoughts and how I approach them.

There’s another conflict I face. One inmate insists that I owe him $30, even though I have nothing to do with it. He’s demanding that I pay him the amount another prisoner claims I owe. This is another version of my “tiger story.” I’ve come to accept that this is my karma. I created this situation, just as I created the blackmailer in my life. His actions, like the tiger, are a manifestation of my own choices and the selfishness in my heart. This is the karma I have made.

James

6.25.    Tiger Inside the Mind

I often get scared. I worry about someone touching me, and my response is to lash out with anger. If it weren’t for that fear, I wouldn’t be here in prison today. The man who died in my case had threatened to kill me, or at least, that’s how I perceived it at the time. Now, I wonder if I exaggerated the danger. Regardless, fear was the driving force behind my actions. It was what pushed me into motion. At that time, I was angry because of that fear, and in the end, I hurt him, the person who scared me.

Now, I find myself laughing a lot. I’ve come to realize that what I was really expressing was my fear of my own fears. It’s such a silly thing! Whether it’s foolish or not, it’s still the way I experienced things. I was afraid that if I were attacked by a tiger, my fear would drive me to react in a way that only led to harm.

Owen

 

6.26.                             Where Does Fear Come From?

Dear Sư cô Giới Hương,

You asked me, “Where does my fear come from?” This is a difficult and subtle question. I’m not sure how to explain but I’ll try. When I was a child, fear arose because of injury. Later, I went through a period of life where a lot of suffering dominated me, mastered me. Then I became a violent, rude, and addicted person.

After being arrested, I generated a new fear. My fear was not of pain or death but fear of mental and emotional struggle. Why? Because I hurt so many people. It felt as if I was always pushed to the brink, and that constant, obsessive fear drove me to act violently. Now, I’m more afraid of that than anything else. When I think about a tiger, it’s not the tiger itself I fear, even if it were to attack. What I truly fear is that in the moment of attack, I would lose my rational thinking.

Sebastian

6.27.    Four Noble Truths and Buddha Nature

Dear Sư cô,

I have suffered and disappointed myself and others for twelve years. I tried to commit suicide by stabbing, burning, and torturing myself. My mindset remains troubled. For me, it stems from family issues. I grew up in a harmful environment, marked by my stepmother’s abuse and my father’s mistreatment of my siblings and me. In addition, I was assaulted and sexually assaulted while here in prison. All these experiences led me to feel impure and morally depraved.

How can I break free from these negative patterns? My answer came through the simple yet profound teachings of the Four Noble Truths and Buddha Nature. One day, someone gave me a book called The Way to Peace and Happiness. In it, I learned about the Four Noble Truths: that life is filled with suffering, and it is our own actions that create and sustain this suffering. This resonated with me, as I often thought, “I’m not good.” The book also spoke of liberation from suffering, Nirvana, and the concept of rebirth. What is rebirth, really? I can’t get out of this suffering by killing myself, can I?

Believe me, I truly wanted to embrace this insight. The idea of rebirth is the only thing that has prevented me from committing further harmful acts. What is hell? Hell exists deep within, hidden beneath the surface.

Once again, is the cessation of suffering true inner purity? I have spent my entire life causing pain, hurting others and harboring hatred towards people and everything around me. I killed people.

What is the Buddha nature? I realized that all things are imbued with suffering. I am aware that I have caused suffering to others. There were times when I desperately wished for death, but I knew that death would not free me. I was trapped, with nowhere to go, no way out. Then, hope was offered to me. Sư cô Giới Hương and other monastics taught us about Buddha nature. My future is neither inherently pure nor impure. I possess the Buddha nature within me. This was exemplified in the story of Angulimala, a killer who met the Buddha and transformed into an arahant, whose mind was like the earth, capable of turning all impurities into gold. This gives me hope.

Though I still carry habits of impurity, I now understand their consequences, and I know that one day I will transcend them in this saha world. Deep down, I feel the presence of the Buddha nature within me. I also recognize that the ultimate truth of the Four Noble Truths lies in the Noble Eightfold Path, the way to end suffering (the Noble Eightfold Path).²⁷

We possess numerous sources of hope, including Buddha—nature. How can we allow negative and

27. The Noble Eightfold Path (Pali: ariya aṭṭhaṅgika magga; Sanskrit: āryāṣṭāṅgamārga) is an early summary of the path of Buddhist practices leading to liberation from samsara, the painful cycle of rebirth.

The Eightfold Path consists of eight practices: right view, right resolve, right speech, right conduct, right livelihood, right effort, right mindful- ness, and right samadhi (‘meditative absorption or union’). In early Bud- dhism, these practices started with understanding that the body—mind works in a corrupted way (right view), followed by entering the Buddhist path of self—observance, self—restraint, and cultivating kindness and compassion; and culminating in dhyana or samadhi, which reinforces these practices for the development of the body—mind. In later Bud- dhism, insight (prajñā) became the central soteriological instrument, leading to a different concept and structure of the path,[ in which the goal of the Buddhist path came to be specified as ending ignorance and rebirth.

The Noble Eightfold Path is one of the principal teachings of Buddhism, taught to lead to arhatship. In the Theravada tradition, this path is also summarized as sila (morality), samadhi (meditation) and prajna (in- sight). In Mahayana Buddhism, this path is contrasted with the Bodhisat- tva path, which is believed to go beyond Arhatship to full Buddhahood. In Buddhist symbolism, the Noble Eightfold Path is often represented by means of the dharma wheel (dharmachakra), in which its eight spokes represent the eight elements of the path. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Noble_Eightfold_Path frustrating forces to dominate us?

Devin

6.28.    Holding the Dharma

Dear Sư cô,

I asked Sư cô Giới Hương about my symptoms, and you provided me with the remedy to heal. This medicine is helpful because it addresses my condition. If I begin to feel better, I should stop reaching out to the doctor (meaning, I should stop writing to Ven. Giới Hương for Dharma guidance). While I’m still adjusting to the treatment, I trust that I will recover soon.

This is why you haven’t heard from me in a while. Actually, I’ve gained a lot from Buddhism and have decided to take my own path and follow the prescribed remedy. If I experience any side effects, I’ll reach out to the doctor (Ven. Giới Hương, the monastics, or other masters). But if everything progresses smoothly, as the doctor has suggested, I won’t want to trouble anyone. If not, I will schedule regular check—ups (visits from the monastics) to continue my treatment.

Based on the symptoms of my condition, I may not yet be a fully trained Buddhist, but over time I will become one. As Aryadeva Bodhisattva once said, “Nothing is harder than breaking old habits.” So, if I haven’t yet become a devout Buddhist, I will keep striving. In truth, I can feel positive changes happening within me.

Yes, I’ve experienced many ups and downs here. I

can’t express enough how frustrating my desires have been at times... .

Antonia

 

 6.29.    Mutual Respect

Dear Sư cô,

I was reading Tricycle, a Buddhist magazine, when I noticed three Muslims walking to a corner of the hallway, preparing for their prayers. I observed them standing, hands clasped, chanting softly before prostrating towards the sunset. They performed their ritual with genuine sincerity, fully immersed in their faith. The Buddha never forced his followers to accept his teachings blindly; instead, he encouraged them to verify and experience the benefits for themselves before deciding whether to follow.

In this prison, there are fifteen different religions practiced by 900 inmates, and there is no conflict between Muslims and Christians. Just last night, I witnessed Muslim prisoners studying the Koran, while Christian inmates were learning Christian scriptures. There was no tension or competition between the groups. All of them showed mutual respect and harmony.

What is happening here is simple yet profound. I believe we should practice respect. Respect is vital in prison, an ideal that doesn’t need to be stated but simply lived. Prisoners must recognize their suffering, and each individual is seeking their own happiness. I understand this deeply. It is through our shared efforts to overcome suffering that we, along with others, walk the path toward happiness, whether through Judaism, Hinduism,

Christianity, or Buddhism. We honor and respect each other’s spiritual journeys, knowing that we are all heading towards the same destination, albeit through different paths.

I look forward to that day!

Richard

6.30.    Few Lines

How often do I sit and reflect on the teachings of a great figure from 2,600 years ago in India, whose wisdom has traveled thousands of miles to reach the Extreme Security Correctional Institution in Green Bay, Wisconsin, USA? It is within this prison that I discovered these profound teachings and found the path to liberation, both within my cell and within my heart.

It is truly valuable to come across a book on Buddhist philosophy to learn about his enlightenment and the path to happiness and awakening. He taught that he was simply a human being like us, not a god, and that the Dharma he shared with humanity is a guide to liberation based on his own experience.

This is a precious gift available to us all, and it comes at no great cost. Even within the prison library, we have access to these teachings. I encourage you to read and practice and enjoy the wisdom they offer!

Sōsaku, tháng 11, 200,

Tojin

6.31.    Overcoming Disappointment and Anxiety

Prison is a place of shame, a destructive experience, not only for you but also for your family. The moment you’re handcuffed, your life changes forever, your spirit goes down in despair. As I went through the system—from municipal, local, and eventually federal prisons, I fell into a haze of frustration and anxiety. After years of worry and frustration, I became trapped in harmful habits: excessive sleeping, loss of appetite, overeating, fatigue, anger, a sense of hopelessness and an obsession with suicide. I feel all of them are myself.

After many years of meditation and psychotherapy, my mental conflicts have diminished. Buddhists believe that we all have Buddha nature, pure mind, compassion, wisdom, and bliss but this awakened nature is obscured by self. Our self is attached by the delusion that causes suffering. We had prejudice and thoughts like, “He’s a fool, I hate when he does that,” or “My life is boring,” which became a part of my identity, clouding the true nature of my mind.

Through meditation, I began to understand what my mind is. How do I create frustration, anxiety, and imbalance? The Buddha taught, “ The past is already gone, the future is not yet here.” When I awoke, I found that much of the time I spent in the past was full of sins and worry about the future.

I contemplate the streams of thought that arise in an instant: too much craving, aversion, frustration, restlessness, and I let them dissolve according to their impermanence. I learned not to hold these thoughts and

not foolishly follow them. I can remain awake in the flow

of mind and not react.

Slowly every day I meditated, and I began to transform, becoming calm and clearly aware. I became less frustrated and bored. When delusions arose, I practiced with them. I observed them and let them go, avoiding sinking in the swamp of despair.

I also found that by meditating on the antidote to disturbing thoughts, my perspective gradually shifted to a more positive one. I no longer view phenomena and situations through a lens of negativity. For instance, when I want to calm my anger, I focus on patience and compassion. The antidote to anger is kindness, and meditating on impermanence helps detoxify attachment. Meditation truly aids in shifting a self—centered perspective to one that is more beneficial to others.

You can transform your mind. You can overcome the negative and practice positive factors. Buddhism has provided you with a method of mastering your mind.

One of the Buddha’s earliest teachings is centered on the Four Noble Truths. These teachings reveal that our existence, our sense of self, is the source of the pain we create. However, we can also end our suffering by practicing the Dharma and deepening our understanding of delusion.

Miguel

6.32.                                 Ineptitude and Potato Chips

There’s a Buddhist film worth remembering. Among

movies like Seven Years in Tibet, Kundun (about the 14th Dalai Lama), and The Little Buddha, the one I appreciate most might be The Jerk, starring Steve Martin from the 1970s. It seems like a comedic take on the suffering caused by attachment, self—identity, and compassion, all presented with humor.

Who could forget Steve Martin’s excitement when the phone book was delivered to him? When he saw his name printed in it, he was overjoyed. This is a perfect example of attachment. Later in the film, Bernadette Peters makes a statement about clinging to materialism and possessions. There’s a scene where she and Steve, playing wealthy characters, are kicking a soccer ball in a mansion. Suddenly, they hear on the TV that they’ve lost all their money due to a market crash. Their friends and servants, realizing their loss, abandon them. Bernadette laments, “It’s not just that I lost money, but I lost everything.”

At the end of the film, Steve Martin’s character, a broker, leaves his mansion with just a few leftover belongings, crying out, “All I need is a pot of ashes. I need this bottle and jar of ashes.”

This illustrates how, trapped in samsara, our ignorance makes us vulnerable to collapse. We cling to whatever we believe will bring us happiness—money, beauty, fame, material possessions and self. Our attachments prolong our suffering in this world.

I have personally gone through phases of attachment: alcoholism, smoking, unhealthy eating habits, and an obsession with material things like sports cars and television. Despite practicing the Dharma, I eventually realized that my attachment to the world would only lead to pain, as I was living imprisoned by my attachments.

In our youth, we were taught that things like alcohol, opium, brand—name clothes, and other material pleasures would make us happier. We became trapped in an endless cycle of desire, a battle we were destined to lose.

You might think of a prison as a place where you lose your possessions, reputation, and friends. In reality, these losses can serve as a cure for attachment. Yet, even in prison, many cling to their identities, trying to present themselves as tough, coldhearted individuals.

I recently had a problem with potato chips. Every other week, I’d receive cheese bread and a bag of chips, which I loved. Soon, a friend began giving me more bags of chips, and before I knew it, I was eagerly anticipating the chip distribution day.

One day, a friend who hadn’t eaten his chips sat next to me. I eagerly watched him open his bag, but instead of eating them, he poured them into his bowl of soup. Surprised, I asked why, and he calmly said, “I like to eat them like this.”

I took a deep breath, feeling okay with it. Then, another friend ate the chips, and when he realized he hadn’t given them to me, he looked at me apologetically. I glanced at the empty chip bag, feeling a wave of sadness as I realized that my attachment had vanished with the chips.

That night, while meditating, I reflected on the potato chips as a lesson in greed within the world of samsara. When my friend first gave me a bag of chips, it was enough. But over time, one bag wasn’t enough anymore—I wanted more, consumed by desire. I found myself waiting eagerly for the next opportunity to receive three bags of chips. Once again, I became a victim of worldly desires and insatiable greed.

I had been running around in samsara, trying to find happiness, but I hadn’t yet understood the true nature of suffering. It wasn’t until I began to understand the Four Noble Truths and realized the impermanence and non— self of all things that I began to see my attachments for what they were. By meditating on emptiness and non—self, I started to rid myself of cravings. I no longer clung to this self or the material world. Through this understanding, I could develop compassion for others and serve all sentient beings, ultimately seeking true happiness.

This is not easy. Breaking free from samsara and the cycle of birth and death requires effort. The story of the potato chips left an impact on me, reminding me of how easily we can get caught in the cycle of attachment. How do we break free from this fascinating, yet distracting cycle?

The Buddha taught us that we must strive to escape samsara, to break free from the cycle of reincarnation in order to find true happiness. Like the foolish man in the story, we often cling to our mistakes. But this is our choice.

Jeffrey S. Bell

 6.33.    Reunion

Dear Sư cô,

A few days ago, I recited the Sutta of the Eight Great Enlightenments of the Blessed One). I found the Blessed One was very firm and very wise in these eight things.

How much of the time, energy, and affection we have is spent chasing after wealth, happiness, fame, compliments, indignation, craving and so on ... but it’s all impermanent.

The meaning of happiness and success in the West is earthly wealth. Wealth is the greedy craving that haunts us and keeps us entangled.

What do we focus on when we talk about the eight enlightened qualities? It all revolves around ego, our sense of “me” and “mine.” The self is selfish and self— important. We desire wealth, happiness, fame, and praise, while avoiding poverty, suffering, ignorance, and criticism.

Reflecting on my life, I see that Dharma practice has helped me eliminate negative aspects like suffering, criticism, and defamation. In the past, I was consumed by illusions, disappointments, doubts, and anger. These emotions ultimately overwhelmed me and led me to prison.

Obsessing over the self isn’t just about craving. It’s also about self—disgust. I felt ashamed of my body and wanted to build a pure reputation by praising others. However, I ended up in jail, facing the consequences of my distorted self—image and poor choices. It was here that I began studying Buddhism, learning about the suffering caused by the self and how to cultivate positive intentions for the benefit of others. I realized that the happiness of others is more important than my own.

Breaking bad habits is difficult, especially in the context of Western culture, which often elevates individualism and idolizes those who stand out. As individuals, we want to be admired, to be those “idol figures.”

The Buddha’s path helps shift our focus from the individual to the collective. We must first understand our own suffering and its true origin, which allows us to empathize with the suffering of all sentient beings. We are all in the same situation, trapped in samsara. As long as we remain in samsara, true happiness is elusive.

Recognizing the suffering of others gives rise to compassion. Our ultimate goal is to cultivate great compassion, to benefit all beings, and to become awakened. Acknowledging our limited ability to help others, we realize that to attain Buddhahood, we must nurture the seeds of compassion.

This process involves practicing equality with all beings and cultivating a mind free of attachments and anger. We must reflect on samsara and its nature.

Prison is one of the most challenging realms, yet it is also the most meaningful place to practice bodhicitta. Here, I strive to develop equality with my fellow prisoners. I have learned to forgive, even when they’ve stolen my radio, sneakers, marzipan, pants, and more. I have to cultivate compassion for those around me, even if they are “bad” people.

For me, meditation alone isn’t enough. I must put effort into interacting with the world outside, maintaining a free mind that is detached from worldly attachments. I began serving as a guide in hospice, helping to care for dying prisoners, so that I could be of benefit to others.

I’m practicing altruism. Change, transformation and progress are slow, but they are happening within me. The root of this change is compassion, even though moments of ego attachment still arise. That’s okay. I’m learning compassion for myself. I must be patient and remember how long I’ve been focused solely on my ego.

We should remember that the potential for compassion is inherent in every sentient being. Greed and ignorance obscure our Buddha nature, but we must reconnect with it to awaken.

Julian

6.34.    Self-Devils

Recently, I faced the demons of self and restrained them. Demons are the thoughts and fears that automatically come into our lives at a time when we are more vulnerable to attacks and thus, more stressful and experiencing pain.

For example, I recently started attending a Vajrasattva retreat with eighty—two others around the world. Some were prisoners in other states, some were Buddhists, and all gathered to practice eliminating bad karma. The first night we had to chant 108 mantras that were difficult to recite and difficult to remember and then visualized the Vajra Bodhisattva transforming his purity into our bodies. After forty—five minutes of chanting, I found that my knees and back were extremely sore. I was heartbroken and thought that I couldn’t practice for another ninety days. In the end I gave up and did not attend anymore.

A few days later, I did not practice meditation, set down the altar and let the evil rule over me. I believe these are self—destructive thoughts and they have been my lord for the past forty—five years. When I was young, someone called me stupid. As I grew older, I felt incapable of doing anything because of that label. It led me to think negative thoughts and consider harmful actions.

It wasn’t until recently that I realized what I had been doing was self—destructive. I failed to take responsibility for my actions, seeing them as something outside my control. I deceived myself and caused myself pain. This way of thinking became such a habit over the years that I had lost sight of who I truly was. Now, I understand that the real issue lies in my own thoughts, not in external forces that undermine the inherent goodness and positivity within me. I can now manage these thoughts and take steps towards living a positive life. During my retreat, as I meditate with my friends, if negative thoughts or distractions arise, I simply smile, let them go, and focus on my breath.

Sean

6.35.    Buddha Nature

With large, warm eyes filled with the Buddha’s heart, one inmate shared that she had received our candies and this was the only gift she had received that Christmas.

To me, this was a beautiful reflection of Buddha’s message of compassion. It showed how his teachings bring joy to others, especially during the time of the Lord’s birth. The Buddha’s mind was evident in these people as they extended their compassion to me and others. I recognize and connect with this part of myself, and I share it with those around me.

With heartfelt respect, I greet you, future Buddhas,

and offer my deepest thanks.

Mrs. Hilzarie

6.36.    Do No Harm

Shakyamuni Buddha spoke about the outcome of altruism and helping others. If we cannot help, at the very least, we should avoid causing harm to others. This means refraining from adding to their suffering.

From my experience, when someone approaches me with violence, sometimes even holding a weapon ready to strike, I remain calm, smile, engage with them and try to persuade them to stop the violence. At times, I must accept some responsibility for having upset them (even if I think I am not at fault) in order to calm the situation. Then, I speak to them about the importance of non—harm and explain that violence stems from ignorance. Through compassion, I try to help them see this, and often, they leave feeling as though they have done something good by receiving my blessing.

In prison, conflicts often arise when one person perceives another as disrespecting or defaming them in front of others. This inflated sense of self can be healed. If we consider ourselves devout Buddhists, the teachings of the Dharma offer us the tools and wisdom to handle such situations with skill and compassion. These teachings help us prevent harm to ourselves and others.

We often think of meditation as the primary arena for challenges, but the real tests occur outside, in our daily interactions with fellow prisoners. Patience is not truly tested when we sit quietly on our cushions. It is tested when we engage with others. The ability to show kindness and generate compassion is measured when we face others, with their emotions and actions, in real—life situations.

While we can spend an hour each day meditating, perhaps we should strive to spend even more time—two or six hours a day on the cushion. This practice helps us become more centered. However, much of our time is spent walking, talking, eating, working, interacting with others, and sleeping. If we can transform these activities into opportunities for spiritual practice, we can bring mindfulness into all aspects of our lives.

Adversity offers countless opportunities to transform challenges into spiritual growth. When we face obstacles, they are like gold tested in fire. Every moment in our thoughts and actions is an opportunity to cultivate patience, compassion, serenity, love, awareness, and peace. If we avoid these opportunities, we will never practice them. But if we bring awareness to the present moment, peace is here and now. In this way, the prison environment offers us great support on our path to awakening.

Salome M. Fonseca

6.37.                                                                                 Seeds

May 21, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

Many metaphors are used to describe and compare the teachings of the Buddha and the experiences of practitioners, and I’d like to share one with you now.

By reciting a sutta, I was reminded of the true power that lies in the seeds we plant within ourselves. This serves as a reminder that we are constantly planting seeds of various mental states, nurturing them every day. We plant these seeds through our thoughts, words, and actions (body, speech, and mind). Some of these seeds are positive, such as compassion, kindness, generosity, understanding, and wisdom. Others are negative, like indifference, jealousy, and ignorance. It is up to us to choose which kind of seeds we wish to grow. However, when planting them, we don’t always see the results right away, which can be frustrating.

I believe that every situation requires a decision from us, and ultimately there are only two choices. If we react negatively, it’s because we’ve consciously decided to plant bad seeds. On the other hand, we can choose to respond in a positive way because we’ve decided to plant good seeds. We live in a shrinking world, especially in the context of prison. We can’t run or hide from our problems; we can only create them. Many of us have been to several different prisons, even multiple interstate prisons. Through it all, I never knew exactly who the other prisoners were, or which prison I would go to, but I knew exactly what seeds I had planted with those people in any given prison or with any inmate.

Most of us have faced problems or tragedies in prison, and in those moments, we are presented with an opportunity to decide which seeds to plant.

In this environment, strange transformations can occur. Many prisoners have spent decades in solitary confinement and gained a reputation for their violent actions, leaving behind a trail of fear. But one day, on a sunny day, in good weather, they suddenly change, planting positive seeds and transforming into someone with wisdom. These notorious prisoners have the opportunity to plant the seeds they wish to cultivate. “The candle has been lit and moved to a new realm.” We too have the opportunity to make a difference by focusing on practicing positive attitudes. Growing good seeds with a positive mind will certainly bring good results.

I used to find the idea of “planting seeds” tiring, but now it has become my mantra. What I do today will shape what happens tomorrow. Every time we interact with others, whether with prison staff or fellow inmates, we are planting seeds that will be evaluated later. All we need to do is remain mindful of our thoughts, words, and actions in the present moment. We should not rely on habitual thought patterns but rather focus on our true nature and how we choose to respond.

By cultivating this practice, the roots, stems and fruits that grow from the seeds we plant today will be like the plum branches of Eihei’s staff, full of ripe, red fruits.

Douglas Stream — Tojin

6.38.    Compassion Sutra

Dear Sư cô,

Every time I thought about it, I felt a deep sadness. I would always regret not acting more decisively, instead of just observing. However, it was that very sadness that often motivated me to take action, allowing compassion to dissolve my greed and selfishness.

For a long time, I practiced the fundamental Buddhist teachings. I understood that Buddhists must let go of all attachments to the outside world, eliminate craving and end suffering. My life felt like a half—realized story, distant and disconnected. Although I remained peaceful and quiet, I felt my existence was lacking in purpose and meaning. Then one day, I read the Sutta of Compassion, and suddenly, everything became clear to me.

I realized that the Buddha taught that compassion is the antidote to anger and ignorance. I had tried to practice compassion and altruism, but I found it incredibly difficult. The more I tried, the harder it became. For example, it’s easy to offer help to someone in need, like giving a hand to a person who has fallen. But it’s much harder to give money for a sick person’s surgery, especially if it means sacrificing something important to you. It’s simple to offer a ride to a neighbor, but how many of us would offer that same ride to a beggar, even if it meant letting them sit in our car for shelter from the cold? Even when we have more than one car, how many of us would take that extra step?

We all know that the lives of others are priceless and more valuable than any material possessions. But how do we push aside our ego and prejudices to truly help others?

Colin

6.39.    The Miracle of Kwan Yin Bodhisattva

The inmate Cong D. Tran shares the following Kwan

Yin Bodhisattva’s miracle:²⁸

28. Inmate Cong Tran shares the Kwan Yin Bodhisattva’s Miracle.

http://www.thubtenchodron.org/PrisonDharma/kwan_yin.html

I would like to share with you a little about the bodhisattva known as Avalokiteshvara or Kwan Yin. “Bodhi” means being awake and “sattva” means living being. So “bodhisattva” means an awakened being.

Avalokita is also a short name for Avalokiteshvara. This bodhisattva had many virtues, including omniscient wisdom. Shakyamuni BuddTheha encouraged us to invoke or pay homage with sincerity of heart and mind to Avalokita when we are in the midst of danger or in need of help.

Names of the Bodhisattva of Compassion: This bodhisattva has many names, images, and emanations. Avalokita appears in male or female form in order to meet the needs of all living beings. In Chinese we call her Kwan Yin, in Vietnamese we say Quan The Am, in Tibet he/she is called Chenresig, and in India Avalokiteshvara or Avalokita. We also know of this bodhisattva as Kannon or Kwannon or Guan Yin in Japan, Korea, and other parts of Southeast Asia. The Buddha referred to this bodhisattva as Avalokiteshvara. I call her Quan The Am Bo Tat, the Vietnamese name.

In Chinese, Kwan—Yin literally means “she who observes sound.” In Vietnamese, Quan The Am means “the one who listens and hears the cries of the world” and thus listens and hears in order to come and help. In Vietnam we pay homage to Quan The Am Bo Tat as our mother because of the great love this bodhisattva has for all living beings. She loves us as any great mother loves her own children: like an ocean of mercy without end. In Tibet and India this bodhisattva is also well known in the Perfection of Wisdom Sutra.

Compassion and transcendence: Shakyamuni Buddha gave Dharma teachings to people like us in the Mahayana texts. Here it was taught that through the compassion of Bodhisattva Avalokiteshvara we can transcend our fear, and that our every need will be quickly answered when we pay homage or invoke this name with sincerity of heart and mind. This is what the Buddha said: Any human being who invokes Bodhisattva Avalokita with sincere heart and mind will be saved even from fires. A fire will become like water. If a person wishes to cause you harm and you chant this name, you will not be harmed or even lose a single hair on your head. If you meet your enemy and quote this name, this enemy will become your friend. If a person is persecuted, and that person invokes this name with sincerity of heart and mind, he or she will be free from bondage and all chains around that person’s neck will be broken. If a person has to travel to a place with no goodness and a lot of fear, that person has only to invoke this name without delay. That person will have no fear and he or she will return home safely. If a person has a lot of anger, greed, or ignorance, they should chant this name with sincerity of heart and mind, and they will be released from the bondage of hatred, ignorance, anger, or greed.

Avalokiteshvara can appear to be anyone in response to our prayers and request for help. Avalokiteshvara can be our father, our mother, our teacher, our family member, our friend or even our enemy.

For the Vietnamese, Quan The Am Bo Tat is an awakening being full of mercy and compassion. When Bodhisattva Avalokita reached the gate of Nirvana this compassionate bodhisattva turned back and would not pass, instead vowing not to enter Nirvana until all sentient beings realize enlightenment. Right now, Avalokita is still preparing for us the journey to enlightenment. Avalokita is truly a Buddha of omniscient wisdom and compassion.

Cultivating mindfulness and abandoning harmful actions: I also want to say that we need to become more peaceful towards ourselves and towards others. I know this is not easy. I still struggle with my own suffering and delusions in samsara. What I mean is this: in order for our lives to be happy and our prayers to be answered, we need to cultivate mindfulness and change our mind to be more positive and wholehearted. Quan The Am Bo Tat can help us only if we make an effort to abandon harmful actions and create beneficial ones.

May this little note help you to understand more about the compassionate bodhisattva named Avalokiteshvara. May all living beings, including myself and my family, be free from the sufferings and delusions of samsara. May we all find happiness in life and quickly become enlightened.

Cong D. Tran

6.40.    Life Change

Growing up, I didn’t know how to find happiness. There were many things people said would bring joy— careers, friends, lovers, beautiful women, children, new cars, big houses, fame, and fortune. But for some reason, none of these things truly interested me. I had new games, but they quickly lost their appeal.

Women became more important to me, and I began to believe that true happiness could be found in a loving wife and two or three children who wouldn’t cause trouble in school. After rushing through my studies, I tried relationships but failed. What we see in movies isn’t always the reality in life.

So, was I the only one responsible for my happiness, and did I just not know how to achieve it? I began to envy those with a spiritual path, thinking they were the fortunate ones who had it all figured out. Over the years, I became sad, drifting through life without direction. I spent all my time watching movies and fantasizing about becoming a Buddhist monk. I studied Buddhist scriptures and found myself agreeing with the Buddha’s teachings.

At that point, I was smoking too much and had no money to do anything I truly wanted. I felt lost and unmotivated. This went on for one or two years. Women came and went, but without true love or anything lasting, they left me with an emptiness inside.

Eventually, I was arrested and imprisoned. Before this happened, I had grown so bored with life, longing for change, that I actually welcomed the idea of being locked up. A year later, things did change. I had a real desire to learn about Buddhism. It became an inner opportunity to focus and reflect. Slowly, I began to meet like—minded people, and I found time and energy to practice. Like a rolling ball, my progress could only speed up unless I chose to stop it.

Now, practicing the Dharma has become my life. After I was released, I went to the temple five days a week to do good deeds. I didn’t want to go home. The emptiness I felt

came from realizing how lonely I had been and how much I had relied on others. Now, I understand that religion is neither about God nor the devil; it’s the path we take to seek peace within our minds.

Devin

6.41.    Meditation

Every week, my wife and ten—year—old son come to visit me. We share funny stories and talk about life. One day, my son asked, “You’re someone who values peace and happiness, so why are you here?” And this is the story I told him.

I practice harmlessness (ahimsa). I chose this path because years ago, I was a marine police commissioner. Back then, my mind was consumed by anger and material desires. I had little love for others, including myself. Those thoughts eventually led to actions. One night, I walked into a pub, shot the cashier, and robbed the place. My victim suffered both mentally and physically. The pain I caused didn’t stop with him; it extended to his family, my family, and the entire community. Through my actions, I created even more suffering in the world.

I’ve had to bear the consequences of what I did. Instead of truly reflecting on my situation, I spent my time dreaming of a better past and reinventing my life through fantasies of material wealth—a beautiful house, an expensive car, a dog waiting at the door. When my family visited and brought gifts, I felt empty. But when I returned to my prison cell, the cold and depression swallowed me. The fear of being alone and the pain I carried surfaced again.

Within hours, I was back in my past life, remembering the days as a sailor.

In 1990, a friend taught me how to meditate, observe the precepts, practice prajna paramita, and deeply reflect on the obstacles in my life. Slowly, the spiritual path began to open up for me.

Now, I meditate until 3 a.m. I sit and contemplate my thoughts, fears, anger, and negative feelings. Between the tears and my breath there is silence—a space where everything aligns. At first, when I began practicing, I focused on the present moment and took responsibility for every aspect of my life, whether it was eating, washing, listening, or practicing silence. Slowly, everything started to shift. Only when I fully experience my breath and live in the present can the constant flow of thoughts become clear. In the pain of others, I see their search for peace and equality, just as I discovered my own path. Through each breath, everything becomes clearer.

Sebastian

6.42.    What Brings Happiness

There are things we hold onto, unwilling to let go. But what do we truly need or want? I have often been a person of absolutes, locking myself into a box of desire, contentment, and attachment. When I arrived in prison, I had everything I thought I wanted, but in the end, it only placed me in a lower position. I had a home, a nice car, but they became meaningless. Now, without those material possessions, I have discovered true happiness within myself. Over time, I’ve come to realize that genuine happiness doesn’t come from relying on others, houses, jobs or entertainment. True happiness is something that lies within, and I no longer need to expand my ego to seek it.

Chasing material fulfillment is what led me to prison. My desires were insatiable—three houses, two wives— yet nothing was ever enough. Now, I have my practice, my work, but I don’t place my happiness in these external things. I wish for the well—being of all, without attachment to any particular outcome or possession.

In the past, I thought love meant clinging to people and things, not wanting to lose them. But in truth, the only thing I truly possess is my mind and spirit. Freedom from attachments is the path I am now on. I am climbing the ladder of practice, seeking enlightenment and the ultimate truth.

I was once Christian, and I loved listening to basic scriptures. Exploring the teachings of other religions helped me better understand myself—who I am, and where I am going. Why did I choose to follow the Buddhist path? It was through the philosophy of Buddhism that I found a way to understand myself and my place in the world. In over three years, I have been given the opportunity for a suspended sentence, a chance to go home without breaking the law. But what I truly seek is to free myself from attachment, to know my mind, to understand the Dharma, and to realize bodhichitta—the awakened heart of compassion.

Knowing myself is the first step. The thoughts that lead to actions help me follow the mental path towards freedom from the trap of self—view. This transformation allows me to assist others and stay free, or to face the consequences of my actions if I stray from the path. It’s simple: when I am free, I will seek guidance from masters and monastics, learning the rules, meditation and scriptures. Yet, I understand that life is uncertain, impermanent, and death is inevitable.

Wyatt

6.43.                                Praying With Hospice Patients

Working with individuals from different religious backgrounds, particularly those who believe in God, can be both exciting and challenging, especially when volunteering to “pray” for terminally ill prisoners. At times, I struggle with the conflict of faith that arises when praying for others who have different beliefs. I strive to be sincere and supportive, remaining honest with both the patients and myself.

In many cases, differences in religious beliefs are set aside, and what remains is a simple, shared compassion between the one offering prayers and the dying person. There is a mutual recognition of the profound spiritual significance of life and death, sometimes communicated without words.

The core of providing care to those nearing the end of their lives is simple. During their illness, we aim to meet their needs and offer our support, much like close friends or family would do. The key focus is helping the patient avoid negative, self—destructive reactions, especially considering the harsh and cold conditions often found in prison.

We work to guide the patient in exploring their own spiritual sources, helping them find meaning in their remaining time. If the patient asks us to pray for them, their family, or unfinished matters, we are more than happy to offer our assistance.

As the dying period begins, which may last from a few days to weeks, the priority is addressing physical pain, grief, and fear. Our aim is to provide reassurance and comfort during this time.

This stage often brings out spiritual or religious concerns, prompting the need for prayers and rituals. I recall performing multi—religious rituals for dying prisoners. Many chaplains and spiritual leaders encouraged the dying to put aside their religious differences to participate in prayer or rituals, and I realized this was an essential approach for patient care.

At first, I was hesitant to pray with patients or use religious concepts I didn’t personally believe in, even though I was raised Christian. I was willing to read from the Bible or assist with spiritual practices, but I didn’t feel comfortable praying myself. For that, I would call upon chaplains or volunteers who shared the same faith as the patient. As a Buddhist, I felt it wasn’t my place to pray in ways that weren’t aligned with my beliefs.

However, there came a time when I found myself alone with a close, dying friend who needed someone to pray with him. I took his hand, and together we prayed. After that experience, I found myself praying in that way many more times, each time with a different, more open attitude.

Over time, I came to realize that as a Buddhist with

a deep spiritual understanding—not bound by the belief in a theocratic system yet fully engaged in life—I could participate in these multi—religious rituals. Buddhism teaches a pragmatic, non—idealistic view of samsara and embraces the reality of impermanence. It also emphasizes the fundamental practice of unconditional kindness, or Buddha nature, which aligns well with the compassion needed in these moments.

Each year, prisoners are given a few days off from work. During this ten—day break, I like to retreat to my personal room for solitude, focusing entirely on meditation.

Nathaniel

6.44.    Lonely

During the meditation session, with guidance, I focused on reflecting deeply on my loneliness—the origins, the progression, and the impact it has had on me. I realized the following:

Smoking, listening to music, and being an accomplished artist were ways I tried to appeal to women. I saw myself as a “fisherman,” using these things as bait to attract and possess women. Looking back, I see that the reason these relationships failed was because I was unfaithful to them. I only engaged with these relationships to satisfy my physical desires and avoid confronting my loneliness.

In the past, I often clung to associations with famous people or groups, hoping that their recognition would help me assert my own identity. I sought to find meaning and escape suffering through transient, external phenomena rather than looking within for true and lasting happiness.

I now understand that ignorance was at the root of my suffering. I was unable to see that the fleeting experiences I sought couldn’t end suffering permanently. I kept looking outside myself for solutions, not realizing that these external distractions were illusions—delusions reflected through my senses. I searched for relief in the outside world, trying to numb the pain in my mind, but this approach was misguided.

It would have been absurd to think I could escape loneliness in prison, a place with no privacy or solitude. Yet, since discovering Buddhism, I have not felt so alone. I now know that the Buddhas and bodhisattvas, as awakened beings, are always aware of me. My own impurities blocked me from seeing this truth, but I am now transforming. I can sense their compassion and wisdom reaching out to me.

Furthermore, I now realize that I am not isolated. I share in the collective suffering of all beings, especially the suffering caused by ignorance. We are never truly alone, and we are responsible for the countless beings around us. It is not just due to ignorance, but also our selfish actions that harm others. Our responsibility is to work together, guided by compassion and wisdom, to help all sentient beings awaken.

As the Buddha taught in the Majjhima Nikaya: “Just as one would entrust themselves to a brave person when greatly afraid, by entrusting yourself to the awakened mind, you will swiftly find liberation, even if you have committed grievous errors.”

Luis

6.45.    Goodness

When I first arrived, I secured a position in the prison’s education department, where I could earn money honestly and use my skills and knowledge to assist other prisoners. I worked full—time, teaching inmates how to read and helping them prepare for the GED (General Educational Development) test. I felt excited and fulfilled in this role. As a senior lecturer, I earn $60 a month.

It is challenging to completely avoid involvement in the black market. Whether I like it or not, the world of crime is the environment I live in, and I often have to find a way to balance my commitment to Buddhist precepts with my desire to help others. The temptation in prison is immense, making it an extremely difficult challenge.

Mrs. Calix

6.46.    Accusation

I was reflecting on why we are so quick to resort to violence. Much of our time is spent engaging in meaningless actions. For example, if someone points out our weaknesses based on their perspective, we quickly become resentful and find ways to protect ourselves. Let me illustrate with an example:

A kidnapper demands ransom and kills a five—year— old hostage in a Milwaukee park. People are deeply saddened by the loss of such a young life. Sympathy is extended to the boy’s family, but rather than praying for the boy’s soul, the focus shifts to seeking revenge on the criminal. The boy’s life is soon forgotten, and all attention is diverted to the crime and the desire for vengeance.

At that time, I didn’t show mercy to the perpetrator (perhaps because I hadn’t yet learned the Buddha’s teachings). What I want to ask is why do we react with anger and accusations so easily, instead of practicing loving—kindness or trying to understand the causes and effects of our feelings?

In the Book of Questions and Answers, a Dharma master recounts the story of a monk who was a pratyeka Buddha living in the mountains. One day, the monk hung his dark red robe out to dry. Nearby, a farmer had lost a cow, and upon seeing the robe, mistakenly thought it was a calfskin. The farmer reported this, and the monk was wrongfully imprisoned for twelve years. The monk’s disciples thought their master was missing, and after twelve years, one of them visited him in prison. The disciple, upon hearing the story, asked the monk why he hadn’t spoken the truth to avoid the wrongful imprisonment. The monk replied that there was no injustice in this. The disciple asked, “Did you steal the cow?” The monk gently explained, “I did not steal the cow, but in a past life, I wronged someone, causing them to be imprisoned for twelve years. Now, I am simply repaying that debt.”

This is the work of a saint. But what about us?

Logan

 

6.47.    Practicing in Prison

There are times when I just want to forget everything, using my time in prison to simply socialize with the other inmates, watch TV, play cards and so on. My mind often becomes cluttered with restless thoughts. Yet, when I engage in these small distractions, I quickly feel bored. Returning to reality, I realize how fleeting time is. As I reflect on everything, the idea of becoming a simple, peaceful, and liberated nun enters my mind, like a gentle breeze. I begin to dream about the meaning of renunciation, imagining a life in a nunnery. These thoughts bring me comfort, and I find a sense of peace as I continue to survive and practice Buddhism within the prison.

6.48.    My Life Has Meaning

Dear Sư cô,

When I tried to focus on my meditation practice, my neighbors would often play music or talk loudly. However, I chose to ignore the distractions and continued sitting as if nothing had happened. If it became unbearable, I would gather my cushion and invite a few companions to join me in the chapel for silent meditation.

When the chaplain announced the end of the meditation session, we rang the bell to signal the end of our practice. As all the prisoners left the room, their faces radiated with a sense of calm. I was the one who encouraged them to meditate more, even after the session ended, and this brought me great joy. It made me realize that my life had meaning, after all.

Dear Sư cô,

Thank you for answering my call yesterday. I know that the ten—minute conversation came at a cost of $10, as this is not a regular phone call but one that goes through the prison’s recording system, which requires payment. I apologize for the inconvenience this may have caused you, especially since you had to navigate the link between the two networks.

My parents sometimes call me this way, especially during holidays like birthdays or New Year, and I was very happy that you patiently listened to my thoughts and guided me through them. As I reflect on what you said, I realize how important it is to be patient with the process and avoid rushing for quick results. The more I crave fast outcomes, the more unsettled my mind becomes. Instead, I must let go and allow my thoughts to settle like mud sinking to the bottom. Over the days, I’ve noticed my mind feeling lighter and more at ease, and this shift seems to positively influence those I interact with as well.

I’ve come to realize that meditation can be effective even in the challenging environment of a prison if we practice patience. It’s like the fragrance of flowers blooming even in the harshest conditions. I am deeply grateful for the peace and benefits meditation has brought into my life.

Totsesu

6.49.    Clinging

When I was young, I loved eating tomato soup with celery. I dreamed that when I grew up and had plenty of money, I would buy a large basket of tomatoes and cook soup every day, avoiding the need to go to the market. I imagined eating as much as I wanted. However, as I grew older, I realized I couldn’t store a lot of tomatoes for long periods, and eating tomato soup every day caused stomach aches and eventually became boring. Meditation and the Dharma have helped me release this false attachment I had carried for years.

I have read many Tibetan Buddhist books about the monks who were killed when China attacked. I learned how they did not resist and why they sat fasting, calmly facing death. They understood that nothing is truly lost. These monks did not give up, even to their last breath. They overcame violence with compassion, endurance, and kindness—not only for those who took their lives but also for themselves.

After being freed, some monastic inmates were asked by the Dalai Lama about the most fearful and difficult moments they experienced in prison. The monks replied that the greatest fear was losing compassion while being tortured by the guards. The hardest part was maintaining respect and kindness toward all prisoners and guards, without discrimination. Despite the darkness, despair, and frequent violence in prison, they strived with strong, clear willpower.

With the guidance of monks and nuns, fellow practitioners, Buddhist scriptures, and Tibetan monks, we can learn to understand ourselves, cultivate compassion,

and forgive in order to transform our prison environment.

Romijin

6.50.    The Vajrayana Retreat

I believe that sincere practice gradually eliminates negative karma. My dedication to practice has made me more aware of my past wrongdoings, even in my thoughts. I regret that according to the law of cause and effect the consequences of my actions could manifest in this life or cause me to be reborn in a lower realm. The Buddha taught that even a small amount of delusion can lead to bad karma and negative consequences. But the past is behind me, and now is the time for me to repent and focus my mind on the present moment. I realize that my understanding of the past shapes who I am today, and it is essential that I purify my negative karma. All I can do is sincerely repent for the harm I’ve caused and make a conscious effort to stop creating bad deeds.

I am doing my best to purify my negative karma, and gradually, I am learning to live fully in the present moment. I practice meditation to eliminate delusion, and sometimes I wonder, “Why am I here?” This question arises in my mind every day. But then, I took refuge and made a vow. My vow is simple: I fear being reborn in a lower realm, so I promise to help others avoid the suffering I have experienced. To do this, I must understand the causes of suffering and how to remedy them before I can truly help others begin their journey. I know that I must always strive to improve my own attitude.

I am grateful for the opportunity to share my thoughts with others. Like a branch swaying in the wind, my actions ripple and grow, impacting those around me. I consider my life a blessing because I have encountered the Buddha Dharma, the monks and nuns, and my fellow prisoners. This is a precious gift to me.

Ms. Cairistiona

6.51.    Inmates and Buddhism

Ngày 15, tháng 2, năm 2008

February 15, 2008

Dear Sư cô,

It was snowing a lot yesterday. Today, I went outside to see if the cold was bearable, and the snow had blanketed the ground and branches, creating a beautiful winter scene.

As I mentioned before, when I first understood the Dharma, I observed a Buddhist living in this prison. His way of life deeply intrigued me. His confidence and actions inspired me to learn more. Since deciding to dedicate my life to Buddhism, I’ve noticed that other prisoners have also shown an interest in following my example. They observe how I spend my time, finding stability amidst the chaos of prison life, and are curious about my practice. I’ve shared my thoughts and some of the Buddha’s teachings with them. While my goal is to share my practice, I know it’s a difficult task. Some have embraced it, but I’ve had little success with others.

It’s surprising how, when prisoners enter the system, many turn to a higher power or religion. I believe this is because it offers them a chance to reflect on their lives and search for truth. As a result, many inmates move from one religion or philosophy to another until they find one that resonates with them. This is true for many Buddhist prisoners I know, and I’ve also encountered Christians and Muslims who found value in Buddhism. We’ve had some fascinating discussions.

I think most prisoners choose Buddhism because it doesn’t require extensive study to see results. It’s practical and the results come quickly. This was my experience. When I spent two and a half years in solitary confinement, I was left with no choice but to reflect on my actions. Once released, I discovered Buddhism, and its teachings perfectly aligned with my thinking. Since then, I’ve devoted myself to the practice.

One of the recurring topics of discussion in prison is personal responsibility. It plays a significant role in the lives of many prisoners here. Over time, I’ve observed that some people consider me a Buddhist philosopher, as I have found answers to my questions. I see myself in the same light as others who seek understanding. For the most part, I believe I’ve chosen the best path for myself, and I often try to guide others towards what might be best for them. I am becoming more skilled at helping fellow inmates gain insight, as I’ve spent twelve years in prison and have undergone a transformation. However, I also realize that I am not yet ready to teach everyone, as my own knowledge remains limited.

I believe everything in life requires balance.

Tojin

6.52.    Equal Compassion

January 21, 2008

Dear Teacher Sư cô,

I have just finished reading the book, Zen Master, by Irmgard Schloegl, and I found it to be incredibly insightful. After finishing it, I felt compelled to write to you about it as part of my own learning process. I’ve come to realize that, to some extent, life’s obstacles have caused me to lose parts of my life. However, as I reflect on this and the progress I’ve made, I feel fortunate to be in prison. I may be incarcerated, but I have a loving family, good friends, and teachers. Despite having what I consider to be a happy life, I sometimes wish I could share my good fortune with other inmates. Yet, this is difficult while I’m still here. When I try to be kind and share my experiences with others, they often see me as an easy target to manipulate, which can be frustrating. However, I know that love must be mutual and should not be based on favoritism or preference.

January 21, 2008

I set aside my typewriter to finish lessons for the Buddhist Press class. I had to answer a few questions before the prisoners woke up and began causing a ruckus. There are times when the behavior of others is maddening. For example, one prisoner refused to leave his cell. I too, was once in that position, though I’ve never joined in the shouting, cheering, or complaining about my situation. In situations like this, the whole group is confined to solitary rather than having the opportunity to eat in the dorms or exercise outside. I tried to focus on answering the teacher’s questions about the Four Noble Truths, but the noise from the other prisoners made it impossible to concentrate. One neighbor even banged his hand on the wall until it swelled, continuing to scream in frustration. It’s hard to deal with the characteristics of these people, and it often seems that they only understand when they’re physically punished. But I choose not to take that path.

The weather is growing colder. I’ve only been outside for two weeks, and each time, the ground was covered in snow, with only a few trees standing bare along the path, enduring the harsh conditions. Despite the chill, it’s pleasant to admire the snowy landscape, and it reminds me of the vast sky beyond these walls. I try to hold onto these moments in my mind for as long as I can. A good friend visited me the other day with her sister, and they planned to find a lawyer to help reduce my sentence. I’ve been waiting for such a glimmer of hope for a long time, and I am grateful for their kindness. I often think of the day when I might be able to return to the beach, walk by Lake Milwaukee, or stroll through the red—leafed forest at sunset.

I looked up at the small window overhead.

Tojin

Giới Hương in front of

Oshkosh Correctional Institution, Wisconsin

                                                     *********

Chapter 7

THE FUNDAMENTAL TEACHINGS THE BUDDHA’S TEACHINGS ON THE DEATH PENALTY

B

uddhism, a religion of compassion, loving— kindness   and   wisdom,   always   respects   and dignifies the lives of all living things and living beings. Buddhism appears in the world to bring peace and happiness to the gods and human beings. Indeed, in ancient as well as modern times, Buddhism has never brought suffering to anyone. Buddhism only provides the path of transformation of suffering for anyone who has an

inquiring mind and a need to reach that path.

Today, on the occasion of the Peace Fellowship of Milwaukee holding a Buddhist Conversation with the topic, “Buddhist View on the Death Penalty,” we shall elucidate it with the following ideas:

7.1.    The Five Precepts

The most basic and important set constituting a course of training rules for the path of personal spiritual development in Buddhist Vinaya is well—known to most Buddhists as the five precepts (Panca Sila):[1]

1. I undertake the precept to abstain from taking life. (Pānātipātā ṇī Sikkhāpadaṃ samādiyāmi)
2. I undertake the precept to abstain from taking what is not given.

(Adinnādānā veramaṇī Sikkhāpadaṃ samādiyāmi)

3. I undertake the precept to abstain from misconduct in sensual

(Kāmesu                micchācārā                veramaṇī Sikkhāpadaṃsamā— diyāmi)

4. I undertake the precept to abstain from telling (Musāvādā Veramaṇī Sikkhāpadaṃ samādiyāmi)
5. I undertake the Precept to abstain from liquor that

causes intoxication and indolence.

(Surā—meraya—majja—pamādaṭṭhānā veramaṃī sikkhā padaṃ samādiyāmi).

In the negative meaning, these are five precepts of prohibition, i.e., not to commit any sin or crime. The nature of the prohibition was twofold:

• Prohibition in order to safeguard one from sin or crime, like the prohibition of drinking an intoxicating liquor, which may lead to a sin or
• Prohibitions of actual crimes, such as killing, stealing, committing adultery, lying, etc. which are in our evil nature.

In the positive meaning, the first precept helps to promote loving—kindness and goodwill. The second can nurture our honesty, generosity, non—attachment and right livelihood. The third helps to cultivate self—restraint, safeguards over the emotions and senses, and controls worldly lust. The fourth precept leads to the development of reliability, honesty, and ethical integrity. The last helps to return our mindfulness, awakening and insight.

Therefore, the practice of Buddhist precepts helps us to lead a moral life Therefore, practicing the Buddhist precepts helps guide us in living a morally upright life. and to advance further on the spiritual path in personal life. It helps to promote peaceful coexistence, a cooperative spirit, mutual trust in society, and promotes social progress and development.

7.2.    The First Precept

The first precept advocates against the destruction of life. This is based on the principle of goodwill and respect for the right to live of all living beings.

In the first Bodhisattva precept of the Brahma Net Sutra, the Buddha teaches it in detail: “A disciple of the Buddha shall not himself kill, encourage others to kill, kill by expedient means, praise killing, rejoice at witnessing killing, or kill through incantation or deviant mantras. He must not create the causes, conditions, methods, or karma of killing, and shall not intentionally kill any living creature.” [2]

There are five conditions [3] that constitute the immoral act of killing: (1) the fact and presence of a living being, human or animal; (2) the knowledge that the being is a living being; (3) the intent or resolution to kill; (4) the act of killing by appropriate means; and (5) the resulting death. In the absence of any one of these conditions, the act would not constitute killing even though death should follow. The event would be considered an accident and would not entail any evil effect for the performer of the act.

There are six means of killing [4] (1) killing with one’s own hands, (2) causing another to kill by giving an order,

(3) killing by shooting, pelting with stones, sticks, (4) killing by digging trenches, and entrapping a being, (5) killing by the powers of iddhi, or occult means, and (6) killing by mantras, or occult sciences. Whatever device may be used, the individual who kills or destroys the psychic life of a sentient being commits the evil deed of panatipata kamma patha.

Therefore, a true Buddhist cannot do or support the death penalty toward others because the death penalty means taking a human life or ending a human life with five conditions and any of six means of killing.

7.3.    Compassion

In the Brahma Net Sutra [5] the Buddha says in the first precept that “As a Buddha’s disciple, he ought to nurture a mind of compassion and filial piety, always devising expedient means to rescue and protect all beings. If instead, he fails to restrain himself and kills sentient beings without mercy; he commits a parajika (major) offense.”

By observing this precept we learn to cultivate loving— kindness and compassion. We love others as ourselves. We see others’ suffering as our own and endeavor to do what we can to help alleviate their problems. We nurture love, compassion, and develop an altruistic spirit for the well—being of others, cultivating awareness of respect for and the protection of all beings.

In the Karanaiya Metta Sutta, the Buddha also says:

Let no one deceive another or despise anyone anywhere, or through anger or irritation wish for another to suffer.

As a mother would risk her life to protect her child, her only child, even so should one cultivate a limitless heart with regard to all beings. With goodwill for the entire cosmos, cultivate a limitless heart. [6]

7.4.    Buddhata (innate goodness of the mind)

Another reason the Buddhist world does not support the death penalty is that the Buddha taught that the basic nature of every sentient being or creature (human or animal) is pure, that the deeper nature of mind is something pure, the essence of which is enlightenment or enlightened knowledge known as Buddha nature (Buddhata), the knowledge possessed by a Buddha.

The Buddha always confirmed, “And I see beings who observe the precepts, no flaw in their conduct, pure as jewels and gems, and in that manner seeking the

Buddha way.” [7] So, if human beings become violent, it could be because of many reasons but one of them must be the negative thoughts which arise as a result of their environment and circumstance. However, they do have the potential to improve as well as return to their ever— true nature.

7.5.    Do Not Kill Animals

As it is mentioned above, all creatures possess Buddha nature. So, we not only do not kill humans, but we do not even harm animals. Moreover, in some circumstances in accordance with the law of karma, humans can be reborn as humans and animals can be reborn as humans. In Buddhism the most fundamental guideline for conduct is ahimsa, the prohibition against the bringing of harm or death to any living being. Since we wish to live, we should not kill human beings or even any other living beings. Furthermore, the karma of killing is understood as the root of all suffering and the fundamental cause of sickness and war, and the forces of killing are explicitly identified with the demonic. The highest and most universal ideal of Buddhism is to work unceasingly for a permanent end to the suffering of all living beings, not just humans.

In the Brahma Net Sutra, [8] the Buddha says: “Whenever a bodhisattva [9] sees a person preparing to kill an animal, he should devise a skillful method to rescue and protect it, freeing it from its suffering and difficulties

7.6.    Vegetarianism

The universal loving—kindness towards all also means that we not only do not kill humans and animals but should observe the rule of keeping ourselves as vegetarian. This is the definite and positive instructions from the Buddha with regard to the development of the perfect manner in humans.

All beings, human or beast

Love life and hate to die.

They fear most the butcher’s knife

Which slices and chops them piece by piece. Instead of being cruel and mean,

Why not stop killing and cherish life? [10]

The Buddha advocates a completely vegetarian diet as a natural and logical requirement of and adherence to the moral precept against the taking of life. The Bodhisattva Precepts also obviously prohibit the eating of non— vegetarian food.

Mahakashyapa asked the Buddha, “Why is it that the Thus Come One does not allow eating meat?” The Buddha replied, “It is because meat eating cuts off the seeds of great compassion.” [11]

We should not limit our compassion to animals and to those of like mind, but extend it to all living beings, even if we feel that some are clearly in the wrong. Compassion should be the basis of all our interactions with others, regardless of what their views and actions may be.

7.7.    A Form of Revenge

In our legal systems there are said to be certain reasons and purposes for employing the death penalty. It is used to punish offenders, to prevent them from ever repeating their misdeed and to deter others. However, it is also very obviously a form of revenge in an inner subtle meaning.

We should reduce the fear, hatred and thoughts of revenge generated by torturing and killing. The concept of revenge is totally foreign to the Buddhist world. The death penalty is an especially severe form of punishment with the intent that life will stop forever. The human life is ended, and the executed person is deprived of the opportunity to change, to restore the harm done or compensate for it. Would implementing the death penalty on a convicted murderer resurrect his or her victim? Of course, it is not. Thus, the death penalty is useless.

The Buddha teaches that:

Hostilities aren’t stilled through hostility, regardless. Hostilities are stilled through non—hostility. This is an unending truth. [12]

7.8.    Psychology

According to Buddhism, the conditions of the next lifetime (reincarnation) depend on the last thoughts, the last state of mind of the one dying. A violent criminal’s mind or psychology is not exactly in a peaceful state. Subjecting him to an execution is going to make his state of mind even more violent, filling him with anger and fear. As a result, he is going to be reborn an even more violent person than he is now. He is going to grow up, committing even worse crimes than he did before.

In the Culakammavibhanga Sutta [13] (The Shorter Exposition of Kamma) of Majjhima Nikaya, the Blessed One said this:

“Here, student, some woman or man is angry, much given to rage; even when little is said, he is furious, angry, ill disposed, resentful, he shows ill temper, hate, and surliness. Due to having performed and completed such kammas, on the dissolution of the body, after death, he reappears in a state of deprivation. If instead he comes

to the human state, he is ugly wherever he is reborn. This is the way that leads to ugliness, which is to say, to be furious, angry, ill—disposed, resentful, and to show ill temper, hate and surliness.”

Therefore we should avoid bringing about the psychology of unpeace to the criminal as he must then face death unwillingly and un—deliberately.

7.9.    Law of Karma

Karma or action is the energy that is generated by human thoughts, words, and deeds. It can be positive, negative, or meditative, and can have a profound effect on the next incarnation of any sentient being.

“Negative karma results in rebirth in one of the three lower realms (the hells, the ghost realms, or animal world); positive karma produces rebirth in the human, demigod or sensual god worlds, and meditative karma brings rebirth in the higher heavens of form and formlessness.” [14]

The Telakatahagstha states:   “He   who   destroys the life of any being may, in his next birth, meet death unexpectedly while in the prime of life, even though he is possessed of all the amenities of life, wealth and beauty, like an Adonis.” [15]

“The Blessed One [16] said this: Here, student, some woman or man is a killer of living beings, murderous, bloody handed, given to blows and violence, merciless to all living beings. Due to having performed and completed such kammas, on the dissolution of the body, after death, he reappears in a state of deprivation, in an unhappy destination, in perdition, in hell. If, on the dissolution of the body, after death, instead of his reappearing in a state of deprivation, in an unhappy destination, in perdition, in hell, he comes to the human state, he is short—lived wherever he is reborn. This is the way that leads to a short life, which is to say, to be a killer of living beings, murderous, bloody handed, given to blows and violence, merciless to all living beings.”

“But here some woman or man, having abandoned the killing of living beings, abstains from killing living beings, lays aside the rod and lays aside the knife, is considerate and merciful and dwells compassionate for the welfare of all living beings. Due to having performed and completed such kammas, on the dissolution of the body, after death, he reappears in a happy destination in the heavenly world. If, on the dissolution of the body, after death, instead of his reappearing in a happy destination, in the heavenly world, he comes to the human state, he is long—lived wherever he is reborn. This is the way that leads to long life, which is to say, to have abandoned the killing of living beings, to abstain from killing living beings, to lay aside the rod and lay aside the knife, to be considerate and merciful, and to dwell compassionate for the welfare of all living beings.”

So with the logic presented here, it is clear that killing even a violent criminal will creates some serious bad karma for the killer, and reduces the potential for a peaceful death for the criminal.

7.10.    Buddhist Texts

Abolition of the death penalty is a regular theme in Buddhism, we shall see the implications from the great voice of the Buddha in the scriptures and treatise of Theravada and Mahayana (here I mention only a few) as below:

1. Theravada Suttas
   • Dhammapada

All tremble at the rod. All are fearful of death. Draw the parallel to yourself. Neither kill nor get others to kill. [17]

All tremble at the rod. All hold their life dear. Draw the

parallel to yourself. Neither kill nor get others to kill. [18]

Having put aside violence against beings fearful or firm, he neither kills nor gets others to kill. He is what I call a Brahmin.[19]

A.2.  Jatakas

i.  Banian Jataka and others:

In Jataka [20] the Buddha in a former life was reborn as a deer king named Nyagrodha. He offered to substitute his own life for that of a pregnant deer who was about to give birth. In another previous lifetime, the Buddha sacrificed his own life to feed a starving tiger and her two cubs who were trapped in the snow. He reasoned that it would be better to save three lives than to merely preserve his own. It is better to lose one’s own life than to kill another being. There are many other stories about the Buddha’s immeasurable rebirths that illustrate the relative value of one’s life and the momentous precepts that one must not kill creatures and that preserving physical life is relatively unimportant. For the sake of upholding the precept, he sacrificed even his own life. The Buddha said:

“Furthermore, one [should] consider [thus]: “From the past on up to the present, I have lost my life an innumerable number of times. At times I have incarnated as a malevolent brigand, as a bird, or as a beast where I have lived merely for the sake of wealth or profit or all manner of unworthy pursuits. Now I have encountered [a situation where I might perish] on account of preserving the pure precepts. To not spare this body and sacrifice my life to uphold the precepts would be a billion times better than and [in fact] incomparable to safeguarding my body [at the expense of] violating the prohibitions. In this manner one decides that one should forsake the body in order to protect [the integrity] of the pure precepts.”

ii.   The Butcher’s Son Jataka

The story of the Butcher’s Son and the Killing Precept narrates that there once was a man who was a sotapanna

• born into the family of a He was on the threshold of adulthood. Although he was expected to pursue his household occupation, he was unable to kill animals. His father and mother gave him a knife and a sheep and shut him up in a room, telling him, “If you do not kill the sheep, we will not allow you to come out and see the sun or the moon or to have the food and drink to survive.”

The son thought to himself, “If I kill this sheep, then I will [be compelled to] pursue this occupation my entire life. How could I commit this great crime for the sake of this body?” Then he took up the knife and killed himself. The father and mother opened the door to look. The sheep was standing to one side whereas the son was already expired.

At that time, when he killed himself, he was born in the heavens. If one is like this, then this amounts to not sparing [even one’s own] life in safeguarding [the integrity of] the pure precepts.

The rite of liberating living beings is a Buddhist practice of rescuing animals, birds, fish and so forth that are destined for slaughter or that are permanently caged. They are released to a new physical and spiritual life. The practice exemplifies the fundamental Buddhist teaching of compassion for all living beings.

iii.  Janasandha Jataka

This jataka [22] is a story said to be told by the Buddha to the king of Kosala. It tells the tale of a certain prince Janasandha, the son of King Brahmadatta of Benares:

Now when [prince Janasandha] came of age, and had

returned from Takkasila, where he had been educated in all accomplishments, the king gave a general pardon to all prisoners and gave him the vice royalty. Afterwards when his father died, he became king, and then he built six almonries. There, day by day he used to distribute six

hundred pieces of money and stirred up all India with his almsgiving. The prison doors he opened for good and all, the places of execution he destroyed ...

iv.  Muga Pakkha Jataka

This jataka, said to be told by the Buddha to his monks, illustrates that punishment can affect those who impose it as well as those being directly punished. The Muga Pakkha Jataka [23] makes this point graphically. The story revolves around the young prince and only child of King Kasiraja named Temiya—kumaro, or simply Temiya.

Temiya is an extremely sensitive child. One day, when he is only a month old, he is playing with his father, the king. The king is then called upon to judge four robbers. The king sentenced the first to be whipped a thousand times, the second to be imprisoned in chains, the third to be killed by a spear, and the fourth to be impaled. Overcome by the karmic consequences of his father’s actions and fearing what would become of him if he did the same after succeeding to the throne, Temiya refuses to speak or otherwise act like a normal child for the next sixteen years.

Finally, Temiya solves his dilemma by becoming a recluse and converting the royal household and many others. This story parallels the life story of the historical Buddha who grew up in a palace but renounced the world in order to seek spiritual truth.

A.3.  Majjhima Nikaya

One of the 152 suttas in Majjhima Nikaya is the Angulimala Sutta (Discourse with Angulimala), [24] a famous sutta dealing with the power of rehabilitation.

There was a much—feared robber and murderer by the name of Angulimala, which literally means “garland of fingers.” The namesake garland was said to have been made by using the fingers of his victims.

Understandably, the locals are all afraid of Angulimala. Nonetheless, the Buddha, who is staying in the area at the time, insists on heading alone down the road where Angulimala is believed to be hiding. Through his unique persona, the Buddha manages to convert Angulimala and ordain him as a monk.

Meanwhile, the king, urged by the public, heads out with a large entourage to find the evil Angulimala. He comes across the Buddha and explains his situation. The Buddha then shows him the reformed Angulimala living peacefully as a monk. The king is quite taken back by all this. He is amazed at how the Buddha was able to change Angulimala.

This points to a Buddhist notion of rehabilitation. Naturally, rehabilitation and death penalty are mutually exclusive concepts.

Nevertheless, in strictly moral terms, Angulimala still had previously created considerable bad karma, and he would eventually die a painful, accidental death because of this. Yet, rehabilitation is clearly the main theme of this text.

Rehabilitation enables the convicted criminal defendant to realize his or her mistakes and to attempt to avoid them

in the future. In Buddhist terms, a rehabilitated offender, even a murderer, will remember his or her Buddha nature. For society, reforming a wrongdoer means regaining a productive member who can somehow contribute to the general welfare.

1. Mahayana Sutras

B.1.  Avatamsaka Sutra

Although rather unusual, another treatment of capital punishment comes from the lengthy and highly symbolic Avatamsaka Sutra which is also known as the Buddhavatamsaka Sutra. This sutra or scripture tells the saga of a bodhisattva named Sudhana Sresthidaraka or simply Sudhana is on a pilgrimage to visit various spiritual teachers whom he is told to seek out for guidance.

One of the teachers is a king named Anala. King Anala lived in an indescribably beautiful palace in a far off, magical land, yet, he does have a crime problem. To keep the populace in line, he conjures up frightful images of prisoners on whom he passes judgment and then brutally executes or otherwise severely tortures.

In reality, the king does not harm anyone because the prisoners, as well as the penal officers, are all just illusions. As the king explains to the seeker, these magical projections are meant to be acts of compassion to get actual people to give up evil.

B.2.  Brahma Net Sutra

In the Brahma Net Sutra, [25] the Buddha says: “Whenever a bodhisattva sees a person preparing to kill an animal, he should devise a skillful method to rescue

and protect it, freeing it from its suffering and difficulties.”

The Buddha taught the twentieth bodhisattva precept that: “A disciple of the Buddha should have a mind of compassion and cultivate the practice of liberating sentient beings. He must reflect thus: throughout the eons of time, all male sentient beings have been my father, all female sentient beings my mother. I was born of them. If I now slaughter them, I would be slaughtering my parents as well as eating flesh that was once my own. This is so because all elemental earth and water, fire, and air, the four constituents of all life, have previously been part of my body, part of my substance.”

1. Mahayana Treatise

C.1.  Rajaparikatha Ratnamala:

The Rajaparikatha Ratnamala or “The Precious Garland of Advice for the King” [26] is a treatise attributed to the famous South Indian Buddhist philosopher, Nagarjuna (third century AD). [27]

In this work on Buddhist statecraft, Nagarjuna gives King Udayi of the Satavahana Dynasty advice on a variety of matters. [28] Here is how Nagarjuna handles the death penalty:

O King, through compassion you should always Generate an attitude of help

Even for all those embodied beings Who have committed appalling sins. Especially generate compassion

For those murderers, whose sins are horrible, Those of fallen nature are receptacles

Of compassion from those whose nature is great ... Once you have analyzed the angry

Murderers and recognized them well, You should banish them without Killing or tormenting them. [29]

C.2.  Buddhist Kings in India

i.  Buddhist King (northern India)

1. Asoka, [30] one of the first rulers of ancient India, rejected military conquest in favor of spreading a philosophy of nonviolence and respect for Asoka’s edicts, proclamations written on rocks and stone pillars, reveal him to have been a surprisingly forward—thinking monarch.

The following section summarizes a number of Asoka’s edicts:

Prohibitions:

—No sacrifice of animals for religious rituals will be

permitted in the capital.

—The slaughter and mutilation of specific animals

and birds by anyone is forbidden.

—The king will no longer go on royal hunts.

—The king renounces victory by wars of conquest. The Beloved of the Gods considers victory by Dharma to be the foremost victory.

Public Works:

—Hospitals for people and animals will be built.

—Gardens for growing medicinal plants will be

established.

—Wells, trees, and rest houses will be put along roads for the comfort of travelers and animals.

Human Relations:

—People should obey their parents and religious elders.

—People should not mistreat their servants and slaves.

—People should be generous to religious persons, relatives, and friends.

Religion:

—Religious sects “may dwell in all places.”

—People should not attack the religious beliefs of others “so that men may hear one another’s principles.”

Welfare of the People:

—My officials will attend to the welfare of the aged,

the poor, and prisoners.

—My officials who are reporting the public’s business

will have immediate access to me at all times and places.

—My officials will make sure that the government of the empire is run efficiently for the welfare and happiness of the people.

Justice:

—Judges will be independent and will exercise uniformity in procedure and punishment.

—Wrongdoers should be forgiven as much as possible.

—Capital punishment should be used with restraint and the condemned should have three days to appeal their sentence.

— “It is good not to kill living beings.”

In his last edict, inscribed in 242 B.C., Asoka wrote: “The advancement of Dharma amongst men has been achieved through two means, laws and persuasion. But of these two, laws have been less effective and persuasion more so.” Especially trained officials, called Dharma— mahamattas toured the empire regularly to assess the views of the people and to instruct them in the meaning of Dharma.

This is obviously to let us assume that Ashoka advocated ahimsa and disliked the death penalty. He was a sincerely devoted Buddhist who embraced Dharma, so he could not allow some executions to take place.

1. In the sixth century, Chinese pilgrims Sung Yun and

Hui Sheng visited India and wrote:

We entered Ouchang country (Oudyana). On the north this borders on the Tsung Ling mountains; on the south it skirts India ... The king of the country religiously observes a vegetable diet ... After midday he devotes himself to the affairs of the government.

Supposing a man has committed murder, they do not kill him, they only banish him to the desert mountains, affording him just food enough to keep him alive. After examination, the punishment is adjusted according to the serious or trivial character of attending circumstances. [31]

ii.   Buddhist King (Mid—India)

An early Chinese pilgrim to India, the monk Fa—hsien (337—422), mentioned of an abolitionist Buddhist king:

The king [of Mid—India] governs without decapitation [i.e., capital punishment generally] or (other) corporal punishments. Criminals are simply fined, lightly or heavily, according to the circumstances (of each case). Even in cases of repeated attempts at wicked rebellion [i.e., treason], they only have their right hands cut off ... Throughout the country the people do not kill any living creature, nor drink intoxicating liquor, nor eat onions or garlic.[32]

iii.  Buddhist king (Central India)

Hye Ch’o, an eighth—century Korean monk, made a pilgrimage to India similar to Fa—hsien’s, but about three centuries later.

He too describes Buddhist kings in central India who rule without resorting to the death penalty: “The national laws of the five regions of India prescribe no cangue, beating or prison in accordance with the degree of the offense committed. There is no capital punishment.” [33]

iv.  Buddhist King (West India)

Hye Ch’o found an almost identical situation in west India: “Here there is no cangue, beating, prison, capital punishment, and similar affairs.” [34]

C.3.  King in Japan

In 724 AD in Japan, Emperor Shomu (724—749), a devout Buddhist and follower of the Kegon School who built Todai—ji, a famous temple that still stands in Nara, forbade the use of the death penalty. This was during the end of the Nara Period (715—794). Likewise, there were very few executions during the Heian Period (794—1185). [35]

C.4.   Dalai Lama in Tibet

Thubten Gyatso, Dalai Lama XIII of Tibet (1876— 1933), as the predecessor of the current Dalai Lama, Tenzin Gyatso, Dalai Lama XIV (born 1935). The Thirteenth Dalai Lama struggled to modernize Tibet and to maintain the country’s sovereignty against the British and later the Chinese. He also reformed Tibet’s feudal legal system. Among the changes was the abolition of the death penalty by 1920. Before that time, the Dalai Lama would avoid any direct involvement in cases of capital punishment because of his religious role. [36]

C.5.  Practical Application

Training is based on the axiomatic assumption that human beings have potential for development. We should not be prey to negative emotions or violence. They compound the problem. Real solutions come from changing people’s minds rather than from creating confrontation and friction.

The death penalty is not the best solution to prevent people from doing evil. It is only a temporary solution to prevent them from doing evil. However, if we use this severe solution and execute people, then this is not an appropriate and meaningful action. Doing this would lose all the meaning of compassion and the heart of loving— kindness in us.

The appropriate and meaningful action would have to be that when a person commits an offense, he is imprisoned or is under house arrest and be given a short or long time to correct his wrongdoing. He has the ability to recognize his wrong action and to repent. Because he is a sentient being with consciousness, he also knows to be ashamed of his wrongdoing. Wanting him to improve his behavior, we must place emphasis on education or the development of human values through moral religious teachings or social programs and entertainment for him. We should give more support to education and encourage a greater sense of universal responsibility. We need to explain the importance of the practice of love and compassion for our own survival and to try to minimize those conditions which foster murderous tendencies, such as the proliferation of weapons in our societies ... We should suggest some concrete methods of education to compel him to practice as following:

1. He should live alone for a period of one or two months, one or two years to repent, and to recognize his
2. He should do good deeds to help others.
3. He should practice meditation in his daily life to transform his wrongdoing into good deeds.
4. He must contemplate about where his wrongdoing
5. The wrongdoing could originate from taking life, stealing what is not given, sexual misconduct, telling a lie, utilizing alcohol and drugs ...
6. The methods for treating the wrongdoings are Right View, Right Thought, Right Speech, Right Action, Right Livelihood, Right Effort, Right Mindfulness and Right Concentration.
7. He would become a good person as ever Buddhism is the path of transforming suffering. We can all be subjected to negative disturbing emotions and negative mental qualities, with or without offense, but by applying the above methods of education to our daily life, we can gather flowers and fruits of peacefulness and happiness in the here and the now in the present life. The best solution is prevention rather than intervention. Teaching comes before punishment. A good cause would produce a good effect.

It is a fact that throughout the Buddhist scriptures, Buddhism has a strong stance against killing in general, and in some cases against the death penalty. There is no doubt whatsoever that the Buddha did not approve of the death penalty. No practicing Buddhist should support the death penalty. But we must understand that those teachings are not Buddhist dogma, they are the fruit of wisdom. They are simply advice from the Buddha with clear explanations as to why we should not kill, mostly on moral ground and related to the karmic law.

The Buddhist stance against the death penalty is based on the philosophy of Buddhism and at the same time on the realities of society.

First, there is the possibility that a given state’s system of capital punishment could result in the execution of innocent people, and this has happened in the most advanced countries such as the USA The execution of a criminal, once it’s done, is irreversible and irreparable if the criminal later on proves to be innocent.

Second, Buddhism conceives that all human beings are fundamentally good, and the main purpose of the Buddhist teachings is to educate, to transform and reform and not to destroy. If there is a disease, Buddhism tries to get rid of the disease rather to destroy the being who has the disease. Buddhism views criminals as having a mental problem combined with ignorance. So, the main purpose of Buddhism is to eradicate ignorance rather to destroy an ignorant person. This can be done by educating, transforming, reforming them, in other words, help them to see things as they really are. In Buddhism, there is a saying: “It is better to save a human being than to build nine stupas.”

In short, based on the fundamental teachings of the Buddha from Buddhist texts and the generous and insightful mind of Buddhist kings in ancient Asian history as mentioned above, we wholeheartedly support an appeal to leaders of countries around the world who employ the death punishment to order the abolition of it in keeping with the ultimate and unconditional compassionate spirit of Buddhism.

Dr. Bhikkhunī Giới Hương Phuoc Hau Temple, October 28, 2006

 http://quangduc.com/English/canon/vinaya/05. bikkhu—rules— html#5precepts; http://www. unfetteredmind.org/articles/precept1.php;

• The Brahma Net Sutra, by the Buddhist Text Translation Society in USA, see http://www.purifymind. com/BrahmaNetSutra.htm
• Dhammasaṇganī Aṭṭhakathā (Atthasālinī),

1. Müller, 1897, PTS, p. 129; Saddhammo pāyana, ed. Richard Morris, V, PTS, 1887, p. 58; Kaṇkhāvitaranī, ed.

50. A. L. Maskell (néc stede), 1957, PTS, p. 50. [4]Dhammasaṇganī Aṭṭhakathā (Atthasālinī), ed. E.

Müller, 1897, PTS, p. 129; Kaṇkhāvitaranī, ed. D. A. L. Maskell (néc stede), 1957, PTS, p. 30.

• The Brahma Net Sutra, by the Buddhist Text Translation Society in USA, see http://www.purifymind. com/BrahmaNetSutra.htm
• Khuddhaka Nikaya (belongs to the Sutta Nipata),

trans. by Thanissaro Bhikkhu, I.8, Karanaiya Metta Sutta.

• The Lotus Sutra, by Burton Watson, Colombia Univeristy Press, New York, 1993, pp 10—11.
• Brahma Net Sutra, I,
• A Buddhist vow to keep the precept of “Do not kill humans and animals.”
• Cherishing Life, I, 83.
• Cherishing Life, II, 5.
• Dhammapada, by Thanissaro Bhikkhu,

Verse 5 of Chapter 1, MA 01005, USA, 1997.

• http://www.vipassana.com/canon/majjhima/ php
• Mullin, Glenn H., Death and Dying: The Tibetan Tradition, Boston: Arkana Penguin, 1986, 17.
• Telakaṭāhagāthā, v,
• http://www.vipassana.com/canon/majjhima/ php
• Dhammapada, by Thanissaro Bhikkhu, verse no. 129 of Chapter 10, MA 01005, USA, 1997.
• Ibid, verses no. 130 of Chapter 10.

• Ibid, verses no. 405 of Chapter 26.
• Jataka, V. Fausboll, London: PTS, 1962; ed. E.B. Cowell, trans. by Robert Chalmers, Stories of the Buddha’s Former Births, I, Story Banian, Low Price Publications, Delhi—52, p. 149.
• A first stage known as a stream—winner or seven

rebirths.

• The Jataka or Stories of the Buddha’s Former Births, Vol. 4, Bk. 12 (E.B. Cowell, ed.; W.H.D. Rouse, 1957) pp. 109—11.
• The Jataka or Stories of the Buddha’s Former Births, 6, Bk. 22, pp.1—19.
• The Collection of the Middle Length Sayings (Majjhima Nikaya), Isaline B. Horner, trans. 1957, pp. 284—92. See also, Hellmuth Hecker, Angulimala: A Murder’s Road to Sainthood (The Wheel Publication No. 312, 1984).
• Brahma Net Sutra, I, See http://www.ymba.

org/bns/bnsframe.htm.

• Nagarjuna and Kaysang Gyatso [Dalai Lama VII], The Precious Garland and the Song of the Four Mindfulnesses (Jeffrey Hopkins et al, , 1975).
• The Encyclopedia of Eastern Philosophy and Religion, 237—38.
• For an interpretation of the text and some background on King Udayi, see Robert A.F. Thurman, “Nagarjuna’s Guidelines for Buddhist Social Action,” in The Path of Compassion: Writings on Socially Engaged Buddhism (Fred Eppsteiner, 1988); Robert A.F. Thurman, “Social and Cultural Rights in Buddhism,” in Human Rights and the World’s Religions (Leroy

148. Rouner, ed. 1988), p. 148. A brief overview of the Satavahana Dynasty can be found in Rama Shankar Tripathi, History of Ancient India (1942), pp.191— 201; Etienne Lamotte, History of Indian Buddhism: From the Origins to the Saka Era (Sara Webb Boin and Jean Dantinne, trans. 1988), pp. 474—81.

• The Precious Garland and the Song of the Four Mindfulnessess, 66—67.
• Asoka Rock and Pillar Edicts, translation by

1993. Dhammika, Kandy, Sri Lanka; Buddhist Publication Society, 1993. http://www.thenagain.info/Classes/ Sources/Asoka.html

• Travels of Fah—Hian and Sung Yun, Buddhist Pilgrim,s from China to India (400 A.D. and 518 A.D.), 188—89.
• A Record of Buddhist Kingdoms: Being an Account by the Chinese Monk Fa—Hieh of His Travels in India and Ceylon, 43.
• Hye Ch’o, The Hye Ch’o Diary: Memoir of the Pilgrimage to the Five Regions of India (Yang Han—Sung et al, and ed. 1980) pp. 40—41. Also see, Damien

1. Horigan, “A Buddhist Perspective on the Death Penalty of Compassion and Capital Punishment, The American Journal of Jurisprudence, Volume 41(1996), p. 271—288

[34] Ibid., p.44.

• Damien Horigan, “A Buddhist Perspective on the Death Penalty of Compassion and Capital Punishment,” The American Journal of Jurisprudence,

Volume 41 (1996), p. 286.

• Franz Michael, Rule by Incarnation: Tibetan Buddhism and Its Role in Society and State (1982), pp. 70, 109. For a glimpse of the traditional Tibetan criminal justice system, see Rebecca Redwood French, The Golden Yoke: The Legal Cosmology of Buddhist Tibet (1995), 315—25.

Tojin (Douglas Stream) works as a carpenter in prison

                                        **********

Chapter 8

ADDICTION

T

he most common crime in state and federal

prisons is drug crime. Drugs are classified into two categories: legal and illegal. Alcohol, cigarettes, and coffee are legal drugs, while illegal drugs include cocaine and heroin. The drug eradication campaign focuses on illegal drugs.

Many countries have spent a lot of money on drug detoxification tactics.²⁹ The Nixon administration spent US $65 million, the Reagan administration spent US

$1.65 billion, the Clinton administration spent more than US $17.9 billion and the Bush administration spent more than US $18.8 billion on drug addiction programs.

From 1984 to 1999, the number of “addiction” crimes 

29. Costs of Substance Abuse. https://www.drugabuse.gov/drug—topics/trends—statistics/costs—sub- stance—abuse

Substance Abuse Prevention Dollars and Cents: A Cost—Benefit Anal- ysis https://www.samhsa.gov/sites/default/files/cost—benefits—preven- tion.pdf

in federal court each year increased from 11,854 to 29,306. Despite the reduction, addicts are flooding prisons throughout the country. Many guards, judges, and other competent officials know this and try to improve it. In fact, drug addicts often are not imprisoned as they are so rich and so smart that it’s hard to catch them. They hire addicts or kids, sometimes only about eleven or twelve years old, to take the risks on their behalf.

Michael in Racine prison suggested that the government should promote improved drug laws—not legalizing all drugs, because it is not so simple. But it is advisable to validate the use of these drugs, considering these are public health issues. No longer detaining the drug addicts, the prison will have enough room for more dangerous offenders. As a result, we do not need to build new prisons, saving the national budget five billion dollars a year. We only need to use part of that money to build nursing centers and detoxification programs in the community and we will push drug dealers to permanently close stores by drying up their markets.

Walking out on the street to look around, we see everyone just like us walking hastily, with our eyes glancing at the clock. How can we run to get the bus in time for work, our faces looking so haggard? All are running to earn for a life. We run from morning to night, month after year. We run forever. Finally, at the time near death, we know we are chasing death. We do not have enough time to take care of our family. Children lack care. The heaven of love is also gradually lost. Young people do not have mental support, are depressed, easily go the wrong way, destroy themselves because they no longer trust anyone and anything else in this life.

Young people chase after pleasure in drugs, sensuality; adolescents have let go of the future, forgotten the present, and then deceived themselves with an opioid illusion to find the heavenly feeling on earth. They are pitiful because they have lost themselves. They are like wild beasts suffering and crying loudly.

8.1.    Choice and Consequences

Bo Flack was a twenty—year prisoner for smoking and selling drugs. Here is Bo’s explanation³⁰ and advice on the options and consequences of this habit:

Even though I graduated twenty—nine years ago this June, I remember high school very well. I went from being a jock as a freshman to being a “stoner” as a sophomore. I started smoking weed and doing speed and downers when I was thirteen.

Unlike many of my contemporaries, I haven’t developed a selective memory of those days as I have aged. I never married and settled down or had children. I partied pretty hard almost all the way up to the time I was arrested at age thirty—two. Drugs, booze, and partying were a big part of my life because I was in the drug business. I grew up in the drug culture of southern California in the late sixties and early seventies and it was a wild time. Interestingly, I had been clean for five or six months when I got busted. I made the decision to get straight and sober before I was

30. “The Story of Bo ” http://www.thubtenchodron.org/PrisonD-

harma/choices_and_consequences.html

arrested and sent to prison. So prison wasn’t the reason I quit, although it did reinforce the decision that I had made before I ended up in jail.

I don’t claim to be an expert on drug addiction and alcoholism. But I am knowledgeable because I have experienced it firsthand and, in recent years, have studied it in college. I have literally spent years in thought and reflection, actively studying the things I did, the motivations behind them, and their results. I’m not interested in judging anyone else and don’t want to dictate how others should live their lives but hope my story may help in some way.

I started smoking dope and taking pills at thirteen. Coming from an alcoholic family, I had already been drinking for three years by then. By the time I turned fifteen, I was already doing large amounts of LSD, mescaline, and peyote. We were using a lot of downers and booze back then, too. We took barbiturates like Seconal and phenobarbital as well as Thorazine and Methaqualone. When I was sixteen, I started using heroin and opium, including pharmaceutical morphine that we used to score from a guy that worked at a hospital and Tussionex which is a synthetic opiate in cough syrup. By the time I was eighteen, I was using anything and everything. We were doing PCP, synthetic cannabis, THC, cocaine, crystal meth, Dilaudid, quaaludes, etc, etc, etc. We smoked, snorted, shot up and drank, whatever. All the time we were using drugs, we were drinking too—whiskey, vodka, beer, tequila, Bacardi rum, anything. My point is that I have been there and done that.

Personally, I hate it when someone who doesn’t have firsthand knowledge tries to give me advice. Sure, you can learn a lot from a book about many things, but when it comes to booze and drugs, the best advice comes from those who have been there.

I remember very well the time in my life around eighteen or nineteen. I think more than anything I wanted to be accepted by the group. I wanted to be popular and cool. Trying to fit in, be accepted, and be cool is still probably the biggest thing for most young people. For guys, that time in life is also really crazy because there’s all this testosterone running around in our veins making us crazy with overwhelming sexual libido. From sixteen on up, we guys aren’t really thinking very smart; we’re thinking about sex. That’s one of the biggest reasons we need to be accepted and need to be cool. Cool dudes always seem to get the chicks.

Depending on the crowd you run with, booze and drugs come into play in varying degrees. Booze is more prevalent than drugs in some circles, like the jocks and the goody—goody kids. Drugs and booze are the thing for the stoners, surfers, and partiers. Even in the partying crowd, there were the people that took it to the extreme, the party animals.

To those of you using, I won’t say “Stop!” or “Don’t do that!” You are young adult human beings who must make your own decisions. Let me tell you something much more important though, a concept that you may not have considered yet. It’s what I like to call the “truth of choices and consequences.” It is a very simple yet often overlooked truth. For example, if you choose to stay up all night, what happens? You usually wake up late and are

late for school or work. Or you might not get enough sleep and be tired and irritable the next day. Or you might be late for an appointment and get a speeding ticket because you were in a hurry. Or a million different things could happen as a result of your staying up late.

Choice and consequences: I would like to stress that you start to take an inventory of your past decisions, to pinpoint and recognize them, and then look at what the decisions led to. Especially the seemingly unimportant decisions or “SUDS” of the past and present. Examine and try to understand the powerful consequences of SUDS. When you choose to use drugs and booze, you are making a choice. This choice is a SUDS although at the time it may not seem like it. The choice to use drugs and alcohol may have consequences that follow you throughout the rest of your life. The decision I made at thirteen to smoke dope made all my subsequent decisions about drugs pretty much a foregone conclusion. That decision that I made thirty—three years ago still affects my life every day. When I look around and see the bars, the concrete and the razor wire, when I miss my home, my family and my freedom, I know that SUDS I made over the years all contribute to my being here. I know now that this prison that I have been locked up in these last fourteen years is partly a consequence of that decision I made when I was thirteen.

I think the thing you need to understand more than anything is that the decisions you are making right now—good ones, bad ones, whatever—will lead to more decisions in the future. They will color and flavor those future decisions. These decisions taken together will determine who you are and what your life will be. Simply stated, life is the end result of the choices we make. Period! Yes, sometimes outside influences and chance happenings will inexorably change your life, but your decisions are what place you in the position. Your decisions are an integral part of your karma. The better your decisions, the better your karma.

The decisions you are making right now as high school students or young adults will affect you for the rest of your life. They will affect the people you choose to have in your life, and those people will affect what you do, where you go, and what you experience. You are currently writing the opening chapters in the book known as your adult life. You are making the decisions that will determine your life. Dad and Mom used to make decisions for you, but it’s no longer up to them. You are becoming adults and with adulthood come many responsibilities. Good decision—making is crucial at this point in your life. However, as teenagers we usually aren’t qualified or experienced enough to make good decisions yet. I certainly wasn’t. That’s part of the irony of being a teenager—we’re adults physically and sexually, but we’re not adults mentally and emotionally. But we think we are! We think we know what it’s all about. But we don’t. When I was sixteen I knew everything. I’m forty—six now, and I clearly see that it’s taken me thirty years to figure out that I don’t know anything!

As teenagers most of us don’t look at life as choices and consequences. We don’t look at the long—term. “Teenage” is synonymous with spontaneous. Long—term is next week or next year, not thirty years.

The stupidest things I’ve done in my life were done when I was shit—faced drunk or loaded out of my brain. In the beginning, it was fun to drink and drug, but as I aged, it became less and less fun. Drugs turned from fun to subtle addiction, and then to obvious addiction. Booze turned from being cool and part of the crowd, to unbelievably horrible hangovers, drunk—driving tickets, and regrettable actions. It went from being one of the most seemingly innocuous social activities, right up there with cigarettes, to one of the most damaging habits a person can acquire.

There were many adverse health effects from drinking and drugging—some are subtle and insignificant short— term. Others are powerful and negative. Do too much coke and see how fast cocaine—psychosis turns you into a paranoid schizophrenic. Shoot heroin a few times, get that monkey on your back, and you’ll sell everything you own and steal anything of value to get that next fix so that you won’t get dope—sick. Snort crystal meth hardcore for a couple of years and watch your teeth fall out and your complexion turn to sores, scabs, and leather. Eat LSD for a couple of years and you won’t even be able to remember your Grandma’s phone number that you’ve known by heart your whole life. Drink to excess and sooner or later you’ll get a drunk driving charge and an overnight visit to the pokey, if you’re lucky! And if you’re not? Drunk driving is the biggest killer of young people under thirty. Every substance you use has negative health effects of varying degrees. These short—term and long—term implications need to be considered.

Drugs and alcohol are the underlying cause of the deaths of many of my family and friends. If drugs and alcohol didn’t exist, there would literally be dozens of people that I have known throughout my life who would still be alive. Car crashes, suicides, overdoses, degenerative physical conditions, loss of mental acuity took the lives of many people I knew and cared about. Long and short—term, booze and drugs will have an ultimate negative effect on our lives. Take some time to think about what you’re doing to yourself.

Before you get drunk, smoke green bud, or snort crystal, think about what you’re doing to yourself, your body, mind, health, relationships, goals and dreams. Make a list of your long—term goals and then think about what it’s going to take to get your life to where you want to be. Choices and consequences—think about it.

I won’t tell anyone to quit using drugs and booze. That’s not my decision to make. But I will talk about choices and consequences. If I told you to quit using drugs and drinking, that would make me a bit of a hypocrite because when I was that age, I was a hard—core party animal. But I will tell you that if I had it to do over again, it’d be very different. I have many regrets about decisions I made in the past. I know now the importance of doing what is good and honorable, of doing things that are necessary to point our lives in a direction necessary to find a lifetime of happiness, contentment, purpose, and satisfaction. My life is now so much better without drugs, booze, and tobacco, and I plan to stay clean and sober for the rest of my life.

One thing that I’m really cool with at this point in my life is that I know that now my choices/decisions are much sounder. They are not made impulsively. I’m not the spontaneous youngster of twenty years ago. Now I’m a pragmatic middle—aged man. Peer pressure, hormones, and material wealth no longer influence me like they once did. The result is that my decisions are based on right and wrong, good, and bad, and where I want to be twenty years from now instead of twenty minutes. My decision— making process now considers one thing I seldom used to think about: How will this affect other people? It used to be all about Me, but now that doesn’t wash. I like being this age, I sort of wish I could stay in my forties for another ten or twenty years. It’s a good stage in life because you finally have some sense, and the sexual pressures and fitting—in dilemmas of the teens and twenties are long gone.

You asked me what made me decide to quit using drugs. There were several reasons, but I think the most important one was that I was terribly unhappy with who I had become. I had gotten to a point in my life and in a relationship with a woman where I was just so screwed up, it seemed I couldn’t do anything right. My life had become a revolving carousel of money, lust/love, material possessions, and drugs. I was miserable and was slowly killing myself. I made the decision to get straight Thanksgiving Day, 1989, and quit using drugs, but it took me months to extricate myself from the relationship.

Bo Flack

8.2.    Happiness and Joy

“Wow! How beautiful the spring day is!” I told myself as I walked out of the drug house early in the morning to start looking for guests to have the money to buy the cocaine that I liked. A few minutes later, even though my dirty clothes and shoe bottom had a hole as big as a golf ball, I felt comfortable. At least it didn’t rain, I could walk along a dry street, with a sadness in my heart.

My life is almost a deadlock. I am well aware of the despair of an addicted whore. All because of cocaine, I can sleep with anyone. I lost everything, two lovely children, land, a house, and a husband. Sometimes I want to commit suicide, but today it no longer haunts me, because a positive opportunity taught me about the meaning of true joy.

Wandering around, I have no money. I’m hungry, dirty, and craving for cocaine. I began to pass by a blooming jasmine flower. When I got approach it, I stopped to cut off a branch of jasmine and continued to walk. I start passing on the first, second, and third jasmine trees ahead. Oh, why does this flower smell so good! There are the fourth, fifth, sixth trees. Oh! I am not sure how long it has grown there? The nineth, tenth, eleventh flower trees which are truly wonderful. The fifteenth, sixteenth, seventeenth nice trees and I don’t know how many people come across this path every day and discover these beautiful wildflowers. The nineteen, twentieth, and twenty—one jasmine trees are standing here. Oh! There are twenty—one beautiful jasmine bushes growing along the road.

In the dark hours of homelessness, addicted to alcohol and working as a prostitute to have money for drugs, I just received the pleasure of seeing jasmine petals on the side of the road. There is a fragrance of flowers blowing against the wind and what I thought of the fragrance of life I lost.

Sylvia B.

8.3.    Hold on for Life

My time in prison was a turning point that led me to become a Buddhist.

Thanks to my Dharma practice, what was once a sad place during those six months became meaningful. It was wonderful, the daily meditation practice and the strict observance of the precepts— a simple and happy time I haven’t had for many years. Although alcohol and drugs were available (as in many prisons), I no longer used drugs. I was allowed to bring in [into my cell] a cushion, a Buddha image, and a Buddhist scripture.

Although the time in prison brought many difficulties and was no less dangerous, I look back on those six months with an incredible sense of attachment. In addition to meditating and not being exposed to drugs or alcohol, I also did some good works in the prison, like cleaning the library and helping in setting up basic classes for prisoners. I delighted in helping the inmates with their homework and write letters. Every time I look back, I find that the simple formula of “meditating every day, free from addiction, beneficial activities” has helped me to enrich my life, once filled with anger, anxiety, and discontent.

Dharma helped me to keep my life stable and up.

Mrs. Habiba

8.4.    Fighting Addiction

I am at the Wisconsin Resource Center (Winnebago, Wisconsin), where there are often mentally ill prisoners. Usually when the temperature is too hot in summer, my mental state is always stressful. However, when I was awake and well, I wrote letters and talked normally.

I couldn’t live without drugs, and from the moment I stepped into the college sky as a fifteen—year—old youth, I dropped into the world of addiction. At first, I only used the light euphoria drugs, but then I was not satisfied with the mild pleasures, I went on to use heroin and other drugs made from opium. My habit started to worsen due to the addiction and stimulation of the drug, but when I realized this, it was too late because I couldn’t live without drugs. I tried to stop many times with my own mind, but then completely lacked energy, because I never faced the fact that I was a drug addict.

But today the light has come. I made friends with the Buddhist detainees who detoxed and joined them in their struggle against addiction. Our weapon is meditation and forgetting opium. I had to fight for many years, sometimes meditating, and the addiction makes my body tremble. I gritted my teeth and contemplated the compassionate eyes of Buddha covering my body to helping me overcome that negative state.

May the Budha ease our pain.

Bill

8.5.    The Flow

I was tired of hearing the other prisoners talk about their physical parts and how they wanted to have sex with each other. I’m tired of hearing the eighteen—year—old guy who knows everything about the world talking about the heroic gangster past world and how they will continue that once released. I was tired of hearing the screams and the shaking of the iron doors opening and closing. I was also tired of hearing my poor groaning.

A few years ago, I had a short course at a drug treatment center. Here, I met a woman who said, “When you can’t run and can’t fight, be flexible in the course.” I love this quote. I don’t know where she found it but that sentence was still in my head.

I couldn’t run, only managing about six steps in any direction within my cell. I couldn’t break down the concrete wall, so I imagined that my only option was to go with the flow. In this hell, it felt like there was nothing to do. In hell, there seems to be no work to do.

“How do I flow in the stream?” I asked myself. I recently read the book Working with Anger, which says, “Before you transform or eliminate anger you have to identify it.” Yes, I recognize that I am angry.

Everything around me annoys me. But wait a minute. Actually no one has ever made me angry. I choose to react either one way or another and I’m choosing to be angry.

Now that the accusation was clear, I got a little puzzled (often shifting between standing or moving). I realized that I don’t like anger, especially when I am the one causing it. I need to find relief and comfort, as Shantideva Bodhisattva once pondered, “Why is it painful if it is a cure? Why is it painful if it is not a cure?”

So I think the situation is treatable because I am the one who creates anger. With that in mind, I picked up a pen and began to write. Before I knew it, my anger was gone and I enjoyed the coolness of it.

A smile appeared on my face as I saw a path unfold—

the flow of my handwriting on the page.

Elijah

8.6.    Smoke From a Coffee Cup

Amy N. recounts: One of the biggest misunderstandings today is that most addicts are poor, uneducated, and unemployed people, who come from unhappy, unhealthy, or immoral families. I want to draw another more realistic picture for you.

When I was thirteen, I got my first opium shot. Three years later, I started trading in opium to get opium injections. For the past eleven years, I’ve used and sold heroin. Thanks to the heroin trade, I bought a five— bedroom house, two cars, a small business, and have several hundred thousand dollars. Currently, I’m twenty— four years old and have been imprisoned for two years. Everything I did was confiscated or sold to have money to pay lawyers. Not only did I lose everything to state and defense lawyers, but I also lost the more precious things. I lost my freedom, my dignity, and my basic human rights. Is it worth it? There are things that you can’t replace— time is one of them.

I have been exposed to many addicted guests. Every day of the week, I sell to the wealthier intellectuals rather than those commonly known as “casual guests.” I will present this in more detail to let you know my sales average on a day. Each day begins at 5 a.m. I wake up to a knock on my door. I open the door without previewing who is there, because I already know. Joe and his fiancé have just come from the hospital where they practice. Both of them are medical students and are studying at a prestigious university. I see them every day at this time.

After they leave, I hurriedly prepare for that day. I have to go down the street within forty—five minutes. Mark will stop on his way to work. He’s worked for a lawyer’s office for about five years. Mark has been married for seven years and has two children. He has a habit of buying

$200 worth of heroin every day.

After the sale, I went to my usual breakfast spot. During two hours I eat breakfast and study. I will sell more to five customers: a customer service employee of a famous department store, an owner of a sports bar, a small contractor of an electric company, a computer software engineer, and a lawyer. Everyone was on their way to work and dropped by to see me.

Now it’s time for school. I am studying in the chemical engineering program at university. For seven hours at the school, I sold to many other students and a math professor. When I left school, I had to go to a provider to give money and get more of the drug. Keith is married and has a baby boy. He works for a pharmaceutical company and his wife works as accountants. They, like me, have an expensive habit of smoking opium and drugs, and have been forced to work continuously to live together. This is the string that ties us to this group of people. We are addicted to “normal activities.”

In two hours, I have to drive to the beach to see Ellen. She is a successful banker and a real estate entrepreneur. I only have to drive to the ocean once a week, so it was not troublesome. Ellen has enough money to buy medicine for the whole week.

It is nearly 8 p.m. and the end of my business day. I wasted no time selling to unemployed criminals and children in the city. They cannot afford it. Billions of dollars are spent on drugs each year in the United States. Unemployed illiterates, ordinary addicts cannot afford to keep the illegal drug industry running.

You think you know who is addicted, but now you know the truth. Later, it becomes difficult to believe the societal prejudices about addicts in this country.

(Names in this story have been changed to protect privacy.)

Amy N.

8.7.    Overcome Your Alcoholic Error

No one really likes impurity and ignorance. There was a time when I realized I was immersed in these feelings. I also came to understand that we are the ultimate source of our own liberation and refuge. There is no all—powerful God who gives us everything and makes everything perfect. How can I expect to eliminate disturbing emotions from my mind if I continue to create new causes for future suffering?

We aim to abandon the root causes of addiction (sugar, caffeine, nicotine) and the associated addictions (such as opium, alcohol, etc.). Our goal is to undergo a transformation that eliminates the belief that these substances offer genuine, lasting refuge, and replace them with healthy habits.

I have read much about habits passed down through generations. Liberation will not come if we continue to nurture the habit of addiction. How can I claim to seek enlightenment if I cling to harmful habits I am unwilling to let go of?

Intellect and compassion are essential. With self— awareness, we must rid ourselves of what harms us and choose to eliminate addiction. The suffering of addiction though, is always a challenging experience, affecting not only ourselves but also our family and friends, and harming everyone we care about. Our addictions and harmful actions touch those we love. Suicide is never the answer or a means to escape the consequences of our actions.

With intelligence, we are capable of understanding every aspect of our lives. We can discard the illusion that these addictive substances bring an end to suffering. We must have faith in the path we choose and in our capacity to heal the wounds of our hearts.

Through this detoxification process, we witness our progress. We do not rely solely on faith to recognize these changes. We realize that our previous beliefs in external pleasures or sufferings were misguided. We see that our experience is shaped not only by past causes but also by how we investigate, influence, and respond to situations as they unfold.

One of our sources of strength is recognizing that within ourselves lies an area of purity and unconditional potential—the Buddha nature. I see how my ordinary mind has been tainted by substances that distance me from the goodness of Buddha nature.

I have carefully discerned this, but I do not cling to these thoughts. Instead, I feel calm in body and mind. I can meditate on the Buddha nature. I vow to myself and to the

Buddha that I will let go of addictions that harm me and have negative consequences for my body. This is the foundation of Dharma practice.

Alberto

8.8.    Drug Rehabilitation Center

The drug rehabilitation center³¹ only works if the clients—patients have already decided to heal themselves. Once a person makes that vow to himself or herself, the healing can happen anywhere, even in prison. The real prerequisite is the individual’s disgust with their addictive behavior. They have to be sick and tired of repeating the cycle of suffering perpetuated by their dissatisfaction with their life and compounded by their belief that the substances can make them feel better.

Addicts are fearful. They’re afraid to admit it of course. They are so afraid that they do dangerous things to themselves and others in an attempt to avoid all they fear.

Love for ourselves must get established on that narrow

strip of beach—head perched between the ocean with its

31. “Drug Rehabilitation Center” by M. P. http://www.thubtenchodron.org/PrisonDharma/leading_ourselves_out_ html

nectar and sharks behind and the steep cliff ahead which they must climb to reach a place of health and happiness. Hard work is always painful. It’s easier to just give up and slide back into the waters, tasting the nectar until the sharks come again and bring blood and pain. Climbing the cliff is hard. There’s little confidence that it will be any better up there anyway. This is where meeting a true path can prove effective. A rope that works in the beginning brings some immediate good effect that instills confidence and compassion for self. In the middle it shows a methodology that is consistent and believable to a battered cynic. A foothold is established if someone can be convinced to alter his or her diet and activities, exercise moderately, read, study, do yoga and meditation of a non—sectarian nature. They will get calmer, and some fear will dissolve.

During my drug days, I would spend more time running around trying to find the substance of my choice and more money daily using it than I would ever have working a straight job. I was miserable because I didn’t have a good—paying job, but I spent money and time that could be used in getting one on drugs and alcohol. If I had used my time and money wisely, I wouldn’t have had to blame anyone else.

Most addicts want to get clean, but they lack confidence in the system, the clinic, and the therapists. Now in prison, I counsel others. I talk as a recovering addict. My motivation is based on compassion and the wish to benefit (not some kind of agenda to get them to change). If they don’t see it and believe it, they’ll never come out to meet me in the middle. Sometimes people thank me for helping, but I remind them that they did the work. They cleaned up their lives on their own, without a clinic or a therapist. They were their own therapist. Clinics and drug rehab. programs need to empower the individual.

Happiness—outside or inside. An essential point is to see that outside people, objects and events do not make us happy or miserable.³² Our happiness or misery depends on how we interpret things. We have to stop blaming others for our unhappiness. Do we blame outside because we have no self—esteem? Do we really find ourselves worthless and incapable of helping ourselves? Or are we caught up in the myth that exterior things bring internal peace, happiness, and meaning in our lives?

Nothing outside ever makes us completely happy. My life wasn’t what I wanted it to be. I felt unhappy with who I was because I felt incapable of correcting what was missing in my life. I was incapable because I kept looking for the big help to come from outside. The big miracle was going to be out there. In Buddhism I’ve learned that no lasting peace can be found in material things because they’re constantly changing. I’ve begun to look inside for the source of happiness. There’s no happiness to be found in the past or the future. Neither of them is happening right now. We exist solely in the present. Maybe it’s called the present because it’s a gift. It’s in the present moment that we receive the gifts of life, of loving—kindness, of happiness. We all want happiness that is, not was, not will be. Those things do us no good now. Now is where we want to be happy.

The difficult situations are really excellent opportunities. When we are confronted with something that would have sent us running for the dope—house, the bottle, the needle— these are the times we test our progress and resolve. The same type of circumstances seems to happen throughout our lives. We can change the way we react to them. That’s how to change our life. We must be able to adapt to change, to react to whatever comes up not as though it were something, we had no choice in, but as some things that we do have a choice in. We choose how we react; we choose how to look at the situation.

I can be in a cold concrete cell in prison and complain and be miserable, or I can see it as an excellent opportunity to meditate and practice patience. There is plenty to do in this cell. This “I” is where all the work of a lifetime must be done. I have the tools, the place, the worker— they are all inside me—what else could I request? I have a relationship with a compassionate teacher; I have access to Dharma books enabling me to learn the path. I have everything necessary to do the work that needs to be done inside. I can’t curse the people who imprisoned me. They are giving me the opportunity to meditate in a private space where I can do the most important work of my life. Instead of blaming them, I turn my focus inward towards the real source of unhappiness in my life and take this opportunity to get some work done. There is always work to do on ourselves. We can never be bored.

We have to accept our own share of responsibility for what comes to us in this life. It’s scary at first. If we relate fear to an exterior source, we feel incapable of dealing with it other than through escape. See fear as self—generated. Throw it outside with the other useless things. We have to throw all the stuff we don’t like about ourselves out. This is the process of getting clean and empowering ourselves.

I was never really not empowered, I just believed I was. It was easier to blame something outside so that I could be excused from doing my share of the work.

The healing all gets done in our minds and hearts, here in our mind where the therapists can’t see and where we hide things from them and mock them for believing that we haven’t used in three weeks. If we can look into our minds this far, then we can start to move the mental furniture around. We may need help at first, like sometimes we need a professional mover. But we can get the hang of it ourselves. We know we can penetrate deeper into these rooms than anyone out there can. We can keep things in our mind and keep things out. So let’s keep happiness in and throw blaming others out. Just as we kept our drug addiction a secret by keeping it locked inside, let’s lock our healing inside and send the addiction outside with all the other stuff we have no use for.

One doesn’t need to be Buddhist to successfully stop using drugs. In my case, it made me additionally determined to eradicate addictive behavior.

Teacher and friend: An honest relationship between a qualified teacher and the disciple³³ can never be emphasized enough. I was looking ahead to a time when I would meet a guru and engage in the transformative process. I knew at some point in my life I would need to make commitments to mind training and knew this involved purifying my actions and letting go of attachments (addictions). I knew I needed to do some work prior to making a commitment to a guru. There would be delicate moments when defilements and old temptations would arise in the future, and I was determined to have a head start on acting ethically when it mattered.

Friends are also important. When we use drugs and alcohol, we surround ourselves with others who also use. When we try to clean up, it’s nearly impossible if we continue to hang out with the same people. They continue to use and have all the rationale that we had for using and none of the rationale for stopping. Caring, good friends support each other. If I have a weak moment and want to backslide and am with addictive “friends,” I will fall. If I’m around ethical, clean friends, I’ll be able to rely on their safety net. They’ll be able to rely on mine as well. I think support groups work better when the participants are working on removing all their addictions, instead of leaving the “root” substances unaffected.

1. P.

8.9.    A Funny Story About Saving Beings

Once, my friend, a female Buddhist prisoner, was meditating according to her daily practice schedule. She felt peaceful and received a lot of merit.

She was meditating deeply when suddenly there was a knock on the door with a plea for help. Annoyed at being interrupted, she stood up abruptly, went to open the door and shouted, “Don’t you know what I’m doing? This is my time for reflecting on loving—kindness, compassion, joy, and equanimity.”

I’ve done the same thing. While I was meditating in my cell, I contemplated the sins committed by alcohol.

The inmates nearby kept talking freely. I got annoyed and ran to the door, shouting: “Can’t you shut up? Don’t you know what I’m doing? I am contemplating to save all sentient beings from the samsara world and this prison!”

David

8.10.    Intoxicants

It should have been obvious that fateful day that the use of any intoxicating beverage³⁴ would, at best, be extremely foolish. After all, I had witnessed firsthand the devastation alcohol had caused my own family.

Rather than recall the painful memories of my childhood, seeing my father lying unconscious on the front porch of our home, or the living room floor if he was able to actually make it inside the house, urinating on himself, or returning home after a night of drinking to beat and abuse my mother, younger brother and myself, I ignored those telling memories, and indulged in drinking alcohol.

Empty beer bottles and trash on the ground.

Intoxicants can make our otherwise peaceful and pleasant personality change to a more aggressive and coarser one.

It was a simple enough act in itself, and one that most people wouldn’t think twice about. However, for the biological son of an alcoholic, it was to be the harbinger of death and destruction. After consuming half a case of beer, my otherwise peaceful and pleasant personality changed

34. “Intoxicants” by R.L.

http://www.thubtenchodron.org/PrisonDharma/intoxicants.html

to a more aggressive and coarse nature, to the point of becoming provocative. As a result, when confronted by a young man who found it offensive that I was in a drunken stupor in a public park and threatened to summon the police to have me arrested, I argued with the person briefly, and then repeatedly shot him until he was dead. In my drunken and confused state there was no rational thought process at work, nothing that would leap to the forefront and say, “This is terribly wrong. You cannot take a life.” Instead, within a few short irrational minutes, I had taken the glorious life of another human being. These events took place more than thirty—three years ago, and as a result, I have remained incarcerated since.

In the brief time it took to commit the irrevocable act of taking a life, I also forfeited my own life in many respects. In a convoluted way, I succeeded in bringing devastation to the families and friends of two human beings. People who played no part in the actual event became victims as well.

Throughout these many years since that terrible day, I have relived those events time and time again. And while I am genuinely remorseful, I realize that there is nothing that I can say or do that will ever bring my victim back to life. What I should have done should have been done before I ever took a single drink. I should have acknowledged the fact that alcohol consumption can and often does result in tragedy, and acted accordingly. I should never have imbibed.

If asked today, I would caution anyone against the dangers of drinking alcohol. This should be fairly obvious to anyone, not only in terms of such common place things as traffic fatalities, but in the number of people held in jails and prisons across the country, who committed any number of crimes as a result of intoxicants. There is no way to underscore the dangers strongly enough!

8.11.    Who’s Poisoning Me?

When I was eighteen, ³⁵ I did a lot of hard drugs and ran with a lot of rough people. I sold drugs, burglarized houses, and hustled stolen checks to buy drugs and to live off of. One night three of the guys that I committed these crimes with decided for some reason to kill me.

We were snorting cocaine all evening and ran out of it about midnight. I was watching a documentary about Mike Tyson on TV. They were huddled together on the couch discussing something. Out of the blue, John tells me that he’s going to score some more coke. The other two guys, Tim and Eric, continued watching TV.

John came back about fifteen minutes later and separated four lines of coke on a mirror. Then he rolls up a dollar bill and snorted his line. But instead of snorting it, it looked like he blew it off the side of the mirror. I just thought my mind was playing tricks on me because I had no reason to believe these guys were out to get me.

So I snorted my line next. And as soon as I snorted it, I thought that coke shouldn’t burn your nose this bad. Then I lost my vision for about twenty seconds, maybe longer. When it came back, there were thick red rings around all the lights like a red rainbow. My head felt like it was split

35. “Who’s poisoning me?” W.P. http://www.thubtenchodron.org/PrisonDharma/whos_poisoning_me.html

open, my teeth were clenched, and my heart was racing a thousand miles per hour.

I looked over at Tim and Eric, and they were scraping their lines onto a piece of paper and folding them up, saying that they were saving it for later. Well, drug addicts don’t save drugs for later. I knew right then that they had poisoned me.

I looked back over at the TV, trying to keep my composure while I figured out what to do. But I couldn’t think because of the poison and the fact that I was panicking. Then I noticed that someone turned the TV off. I don’t know how long it was off. But I’m sure they noticed me watching a blank screen.

I decided that I had to get out of there fast. So I looked around the living room and noticed that two of John’s kids were sitting on the floor playing. So I didn’t think they would resort to violence if I got up and left. The only problem was that I didn’t have my car there. So I took a gamble and told Tim to give me a ride to the store. They all looked shocked, but Tim agreed.

I chose Tim because I went to school with him and knew that he couldn’t fight. He was a thief, but not a man of violence. Anyway, when we got in the car, I told him to give me a ride to my mother’s house, thirty miles away. He tried to talk me into going back to John’s house, but finally gave in.

He didn’t say anything on the way. But he kept glancing over at me out of the corner of his eye. I didn’t confront him though. I was too busy trying to hold my composure together. I was debating whether to have him turn around and take me to the hospital. My heart kept beating faster and faster, and my headache was getting worse. Before I had made up my mind, we arrived at my mom’s house.

I went into the kitchen and got gallon milk out of the fridge and started drinking it. Then my heart started to skip beats and slow way down to one beat every five seconds. Then it would start racing again. It kept doing this over and over.

I thought, “Oh well, I guess they got me.” So I got a piece of paper and wrote all their names on it along with a sentence saying they poisoned me and stuck it in my back pocket. Then I grabbed the cordless phone and the gallon of milk, went into my mom and stepfather’s bedroom, and sat down in my stepfather’s recliner. He woke up and asked me what I was doing. I told him that I felt sick and was sitting there in case I needed him to call an ambulance. He didn’t say anything else. So I sat there for the next three hours, saying every kind of prayer I could think of while drinking the milk.

I woke up the next day in my old room, and my first thought was to go find a gun and shoot the three guys. But by the time I took a shower and got something to eat, I realized that they didn’t try doing anything that I wasn’t already doing to myself. The cocaine, crack, and acid that I was doing were all poisons. And if I’m voluntarily using these poisons, why should I kill these guys for giving me a different one?

So I decided not to retaliate and laid low for a while. I got a job in a trailer factory and moved back in with my mom for a while.

That was the last time I used hard drugs. Unfortunately, I soon got hooked on alcohol, and it is worse than all of them. I quit using drugs, drinking, and even smoking cigarettes, but I still crave alcohol. Staying away from it when I get out will be a challenge, but I think I can make it.

W.P.

8.12.    Compassion at a Juvenile Reformatory in Michoacan, Mexico

The hall of the juvenile re—education camp in Michoacan was filled with five girls and about sixty boys,³⁶ fifteen of them in white shirts, as they were in a higher risk category. Venerable and Israel (who was interpreting English to Spanish) were seated on the stage and a crucifix and painting of Our Lady of Guadalupe was above. Venerable spoke first about her shaved head, red robes and explained a bit about Buddhism and being a nun. She told the children that they have goodness in them and needed to become friends with themselves. She went on about how to deal with anger, how to notice our physical reactions first as early signals of it. Leaning forward, she asked the children what happened when they got angry. There was a shy silence. They did not seem used to answering questions from a teacher. Venerable smiled widely, coaxed and finally a boy said that when he got angry, his blood went into his head.

Sometime during this conversation, my mind began to question what good a one—hour Dharma talk could do for these kids. Some of them have committed robbery, assault, and murder. Many have been constantly

 “Compassion at a Juvenile Reformatory in Michoacan, ” Zopa Herron. http://www.thubtenchodron.org/PrisonDharma/kindness_and_compas- sion.html

assaulted themselves. I went kind of gray inside. Then I remembered that it was my mind that was doing this. I looked around. The children were mostly listening well, despite much fidgeting. Elana and Gabriela, also from the Dharma Center, looked excited and interested. Venerable and Israel were smiling and working together well. The director of the center stood on the sidelines, her large soft arms folded across her chest, looking pleased. One of the guards, a tall young woman, was listening closely. I noticed that the discouragement, the doubt, was mine. I thought “Well, if I follow this doubt all the way, it leads to the thought that there is no use in even coming here at all. And I doubt if anyone in this room would agree with that.”

On the other hand, I thought of our presence as a gift, generosity. Giving it and letting go. I pictured Green Tara and her blue Utpala flowers. This was all empty of solid, inherent existence—anything was possible. One of these children could become a great leader for peace, a Buddha in this lifetime. How did I know? I didn’t. Another boy opened up, telling us about his drug addiction. He asked what he could do about it. Venerable asked him if the feeling of addiction was more physical or more emotional. He answered without hesitation, “emotional.” Then she talked about working towards a happiness that could fill that hunger, so the craving could subside. She shared that she also took drugs when she was young; then got bored with the highs and lows over and over. He listened carefully, as did many of the others. “How do you show kindness to one another?” Venerable asked. One small boy answered, we are listening now. Another said we help each other go forward. Kindness in a juvenile reform school. Yes, I saw that. Venerable gave the children her book, Open Heart, Clear Mind, translated into Spanish. One boy asked her, “What solutions to our problems lie in this book?” I hoped with all my heart that he would get the opportunity to explore his own wise question.

We ended with chocolate milk and a traditional Mexican cake for the celebration of the January arrival of the Maji, three wise men at the stable in Bethlehem, just after the birth of Jesus. Everyone joined in the snacking— the guards, the director and the children. Nine—year—old Juanito ran up to Elana and me for his second piece of cake and told us that Jose makes him angry. Jose slowly shook his head and smiled. Elana asked Juanito if he made himself angry. He stared at her and wandered away, then back, and hung around her until we had to go. This was the happiest I had ever felt visiting children in prison. Kindness really is everywhere and can increase.

Zopa Herron

8.13.    Addiction and the Four Noble Truths

In the Dhammapada, ³⁷ the Buddha described the harm of craving:

“As creeping ivy craving grows in one living carelessly.

Like this, one leaps from life to life as an ape in the

forest seeking fruit.”

I am a Buddhist, and I am also an alcoholic, which is not a combination we often hear associated with one another.

37. Dhammapada, Verse 24. Ven. Thích Minh Châu translated into En- Vietnamese Buddhist Research Institute. 1994. Việt Nam. http:// www.buddhismtoday.com/viet/kinh/pali/phapcu1.htm

However, an alcoholic may have right understanding of the Noble Truth, in which the Buddha presents the cause of suffering comes from the craving.

I was not only addicted psychologically but also physically. After many years in prison, we changed our drinking or marijuana habits. I’ve abandoned them for six and a half years and now I don’t want to use drugs or alcohol anymore. I view this quitting drinking as a spiritual experience. There is neither blindness nor prediction from the Buddha’s teaching, but a process. By learning the basic principles of Buddhism and trying to practice them in your life. I began to have a change. My shortcomings have changed. My values increased and I began to have a purpose in life. I vow to keep the five precepts,³⁸ especially abstaining from intoxicants as tending to cloud the mind. Yes, I gave up drinking.

The Buddha taught: “Whenever craving covertly rooted, suffering will arise again.” My addiction is an insidious craving. If I drink once, it will float and prompt me to drink more times. If I try to drink a few drops, it means that I have returned to this state of suffering. So, I give up completely.

The rate of recidivism of prisoners in the United States is very high. Many people are so addicted to alcohol that it leads them to commit crimes, ultimately dragging them to prison. Thus, the Buddha taught about banning drinking

38. The Five precepts: I undertake to observe the rule:
    1. to abstain from taking life
    2. to abstain from taking what is not given
    3. to abstain from sensuous misconduct
    4. to abstain from false speech
    5. to abstain from intoxicants that cloud the mind.

alcohol is a must. It is better to die than to drink alcohol as the Buddha once taught: He who is ever mindful—it is he who will make an end to craving.

Akasha

8.14.    Awakening Ignorance

The Sun, a British daily newspaper³⁹ reported that British rock and roll singer Amy Winehouse was in danger of being kicked off a performance just two hours before the International Music Festival was held in France. Amy Winehouse woke up suddenly about her turbulent life. She chose to embrace Buddhism in hopes of leading a harmonious spiritual life, and above all, she believed that the Buddha’s teachings would help her overcome her drug addiction and alcoholism.

Last year, when singer Amy learned that she had suffered from lung damage that worsened her health, she began chanting Buddhist scriptures regularly. This practice helped her relax mentally and ease the pressures of the hectic life of a rock singer.

According to The Sun, Amy recited Buddhist chanting daily when she wakes up and before going to bed regularly for ten minutes on the advice of her colleagues.

She watched a short interview about the relentless struggles of American rock singer Tina Turner, which inspired her to shift her perspective on her own singing

 

39. “Rock and Roll Singer Amy ” Translated into Vietnam- ese by Dương Tiêu in The Sun, —a British daily newspaper. http://www.buddhistchannel.tv/index.php?id=9,7079,0,0,1,0,

career. She also credited the Buddhist bodhi beads she carried, along with a red bandana, for helping her feel more at peace during performances. Each time she chanted the Buddha’s teachings before going on stage, Amy felt a deeper sense of love for life. She is now working to overcome her bad habits and health issues through the guidance of the Buddha’s teachings.

Amy Winehouse canceled a series of tours, especially the Rock En Seine music festival on Friday, August 29, which made the manager angry because Amy only announced the cancellation at the last hour. Many rock and roll shows are planning to sue her for abruptly terminating her contract.

However, she has   not   received   any   comments or explanations from the singer or Amy’s managers regarding why a world—famous female rock singer chose to embrace Buddhism.

It is also known that, in the past, rock and roll singer Tina Turner became a Buddhist after divorcing her husband, rock and roll singer Ike Turner, in 1975. Similarly, rock and roll singer Amy Winehouse began chanting Buddhist sutras to relax and alleviate the stresses of her turbulent life. Eventually, she decided to use the practice of Buddhist recitation as a way to detoxify from drugs and alcohol.

From the Sōsaku Newsletter by Buddhist prisoners in the state of Wisconsin

                                                         *********

Chapter 9

LIFE AFTER PRISON

H

ow can the inmates change their behavior, so that after being released from prison, they can adapt

to society, do good deeds and minimize imprisonment or addiction again?

More than 2.3 million inmates are being held in prisons in the United States.⁴⁰ More prisoners are imprisoned in the United States than anywhere in the world. Detained women and teenagers are also on the increase. The majority of prisoners currently detained are involved in addiction. Three—fourths of the inmates are addicted to drugs or alcohol or both.

There are approximately 630,000 addicted prisoners planning to be released back to the community each year for a period of ten years. As a result, the number of prisoners released has quadrupled compared to twenty years ago. Unfortunately, recent statistics show that two—

 “How many people are locked up in the United States.” https://www.prisonpolicy.org/reports/pietwentytwenty.html

 

thirds of the released prisoners will be returned to prison within four years. These statistics highlight the fact that most national prisons lack programs to properly prepare prisoners for a useful return to life after their release.

The latest statistics show that only 6.5 percent of the federal government’s funding for the national prison system is used in programs to help prisoners learn how to make a living to avoid being arrested again after released. The environment and character are the factors that lead to an increase in the probability that former prisoners will relapse and will continue to commit violence and return to drugs. It is unrealistic to expect prisoners, after many years of imprisonment, to engage in activities different from those they were involved in when they were first incarcerated, as they lack the means to change their lives. Often sinners, before being imprisoned, had an inferiority complex and imprisonment only made them increase the resentment they had before. The question becomes: “How do we want the prisoners to be released—in a state of crisis, dissatisfaction or in the ability to adapt to a new situation that supports a meaningful life?”

9.1.    Probably Worse

It’s sad that people have so many good things to do but still can’t be happy. I sometimes compare myself to people outside and remind myself of “maybe worse.” This is my mantra.

Yes, sure enough, when I was free, I would venture into Buddhism and meet many Buddhist friends. I have a cushion to sit on (now in jail, I sit on a soft rolled blanket).

I said outside “it could be worse” because I heard that many monasteries in Tibet that are facing China’s harsh policy of imprisonment that may be worse situation than I am in here in this prison camp. Every day, I had an hour out to exercise. I was locked up for twenty—three hours but I still wasn’t beaten. My mother and friends sometimes send me some money, so I can still buy what I need, such as a cake or a letter. I have a prison guard to protect. I have three meals a day, sometimes going back and forth outside in the labor area. I can also be contacted to request Buddhist monastic chaplains to come and guide religious practice into prison and I do not need to go anywhere.

I want to tell prisoners when they are depressed or dissatisfied with their inner lives, it should be remembered that “prisons in other societies may be worse than in the US.”

Abbott

9.2.    Detention and Freedom

After six years in prison, I was finally released with a renewed spirit of integrity. It has been an unbelievable journey filled with both pain and regret, as well as moments of joy and blessings. The journey in prison has ended and new journey has just begun. More than two months of after returning home, I started participating in a retreat.

When I was arrested, my heart was overwhelmed with chaos, disappointment, shame, and a deep sense of emptiness. At the time, I felt mentally incapable of coping with the weight of it all. But as time passed, I made the conscious decision to lift myself up, determined to save a spirit that had felt hopeless. I adopted a mantra: “All things will pass away, and I will be better.”

After more than a year in prison, I began to see meaningful change. I grew stronger mentally and emotionally, learning to accept my mistakes rather than avoiding them. Facing my sins directly became a crucial part of my transformation, and this acceptance helped me move forward with clarity and resilience.

The process of healing was gradual. Initially, I spoke with a counselor about the mental struggles I was facing and started taking antidepressant medication to calm my mind. Under the counselor’s guidance, I also quit smoking and enrolled in various classes to help uplift my spirit. Over time, I completed a nearly four—year course and participated in several meditation classes. Dharma became a vital tool for my recovery, and I came to understand that mental factors are key to any true recovery program.

I am deeply grateful to the mentors in the recovery program, particularly the compassionate and skillful nuns, who were hardworking, tough—minded, and profoundly dedicated. These nuns left a lasting impact on me, reaffirming my belief in the power of humane actions.

During my time in prison, I discovered numerous opportunities for personal development and healing, regardless of race, social class, or background. The prison became a place for me to improve and become more helpful to others. I began to embrace the Bodhisattva ideal of compassion in both words and actions. I worked diligently but also made sure to find joy in my work, lightening the weight of my progress with humor and laughter. This wisdom was passed down to me by the great masters, scholars, and saints whose teachings I encountered.

Prison also gave me the opportunity to study and become a scholar. I have read from Dickens, Darwin, Dostoevsky to Jung, Lao—Tzu, Joseph Campbell and the Buddha. I also practice meditation, recite Buddha’s name, make four great vows,⁴¹ practice altruism, and so on. I am now beginning to familiarize myself with those spiritual methods.

 

41. The Four Great Bodhisattva Vows:
    1. Creations are numberless, I vow to free them.
    2. Delusions are inexhaustible, I vow to transform
    3. Reality is boundless, I vow to perceive it.

I came to realize that I had my life back, and that karma is not a punishment but a result of the causes I created. Meditation on the Buddha Dharma led to a fundamental change in my perspective on imprisonment. I no longer saw prison as a punishment, but as an opportunity. Time in prison, rather than being a source of suffering, became a chance for growth. I understood that I had created the causes for my own circumstances, and that my choices had led me here. If I had seen my imprisonment as hell or a punishment, it would have felt that way, but I chose to see it differently. My suffering was based on my perspective, and I refused to let negative thoughts dominate my mind.

Through practicing Dharma, I began to recognize my potential and embrace a more positive outlook. I started believing that we are pure at our core, and that even in difficult circumstances, we can find the potential for growth. I surrounded myself with like—minded individuals who wanted to improve, have fun, and live virtuously.

It became clear to me that karma is not punishment, but the result of cause and effect. I had sown the seeds of my actions, and now I was reaping the fruit. Prison was not a burden, but an opportunity for personal transformation and spiritual practice. Without the distractions of life outside—no bills, no taxes, no family obligations—I was able to focus fully on my practice. I felt a freedom that allowed me to let go of vices like alcohol and sex, and I was able to engage deeply in my Buddhist practice.

I changed my perspective from fear and anger to gratitude for the opportunity to transform myself. I thank the mentors and those who guided me along this path. My

 The awakened way is unsurpassable, I vow to embody it.

time in prison improved as I changed my mindset, giving up harmful habits like smoking and pornography, and starting to work regularly. I became more moral, honest, and upright in my interactions with others. Though I am far from perfect, I diligently practice taming my mind and uprooting negative thoughts with the Buddha Dharma.

In short, I found a new sense of happiness, hope, and a better life through Buddhism. My experience has deepened my understanding of peace. While I am happy to be free, I also know that true freedom comes from within, and I strive to create happiness through the practice of Dharma. I’ve learned that practice is key—patience, perseverance, and dedication to the path. The results will come in time.

Andrew

9.3.    Fear of Progress

A prisoner, sentenced to three terms of twenty years, was eventually released. After being freed, I pondered the difference between life in prison and life outside. Here is my answer.

A common view is that prison separates you from the “outside world,” which is locked away behind walls. This perspective focuses entirely on the prison environment, drawing a clear boundary between the world inside and outside. At first, this mindset might be useful, helping prisoners focus on the present moment and stay mindful of their circumstances.

Over time, however, prison became just another place

we lived. The punishments lost their sting, and we became accustomed to the environment. It even became a place of comfort for some. After five years, the objectives of imprisonment—rehabilitation or punishment—had either been achieved or were still unfinished. Some prisoners embraced the prison life, becoming perfect inmates— adopting tattoos, working out, dressing neatly, speaking correctly, and fitting into the situation.

But not all of us chose that path. Some of us focused on understanding who we truly are, even though we were far from perfect. We knew that, despite the harshness of the world, we were safe in our identity. We understood that although life in prison might be temporary, one day we would re—enter the outside world, seeking connection and redemption.

Those who were released faced uncertainty. Some, after being sentenced to long terms, grew worried about whether they could reintegrate into society. Some even went to extreme measures to stay in prison longer— committing crimes or engaging in violent behavior to extend their sentences. They sought comfort in the familiar, even if it meant prolonging their suffering.

However, for some, prison can be a powerful opportunity for transformation. It acts as a mediator, a space for self—reflection where prisoners can examine their actions, recognize their mistakes, and decide what they want to do differently moving forward. For those who truly seek change, prison can offer the time and space necessary for personal growth.

Many prisoners, including myself, seek to understand the root causes of our suffering and work toward eliminating them. We don’t want to hurt ourselves or others. We don’t want to destroy relationships with our families, friends, or loved ones. For some of us, we realize the pain we’ve caused and strive to make amends, but the path towards change isn’t always easy.

While in prison, I explored many spiritual paths— Christianity, Islam, Buddhism—and met others who used religion as a means of gaining early release. Some pretended to be sincere, while others genuinely accepted their past mistakes and sought to transform themselves. I chose to embrace Buddhism and let go of my old habits, committing myself fully to spiritual practice.

I have been incarcerated three times. The first time, I was released early due to addiction problems. Unfortunately, I didn’t embrace the rehabilitation program, and my inability to confront the root cause of my addiction led me back to prison. Afterward, I encountered criminal groups and drugs, which pushed me further into violence and destruction. Even after being released, I continued my old ways, succumbing to drugs and alcohol.

It wasn’t until my third imprisonment that I began to understand the depth of my problems. I was arrested for possessing a weapon and faced fifteen more years in prison. This time, I was truly forced to confront my demons. I had no choice but to face the consequences of my actions.

Over the past ten years, I’ve experienced profound transformation. I’ve come to realize that I am the source of much of my own suffering. Through this realization, I have developed a deep sense of gratitude for my time in prison. Despite its harshness, it has provided me with the space and the challenge to purify my mind. I now understand that true liberation lies in transforming my inner world.

Through my study of the Buddha’s teachings, I have learned to accept my imperfections and let go of my past attachments. I no longer see temporary pleasures, like drugs and alcohol, as sources of happiness. Instead, I have developed a deep faith in the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha, and I vow to abandon my old habits. I seek to live a life of virtue, guided by the teachings of Buddhism.

I write these letters as a way to further purify myself and seek guidance from wise spiritual teachers. I want to make sure that I never deceive myself again. I recognize that Dharma practice is my path to transformation, and it has already begun to change my thoughts, words, and actions. The teachings have helped me see that there are no down times—every challenge is an opportunity to practice and grow.

Now, with many years of quiet reflection behind me, I feel protected and empowered, much like a marathon runner who has built up the stamina to face any challenge. I am committed to learning and growing every day, striving to be the best version of myself.

I no longer want to harm others or myself. I strive to help others as much as I can, and when I can’t, I make sure not to cause harm. In the prison world, where violence, theft and deception are commonplace, I no longer want to participate in these destructive behaviors. I now see them for what they are—sources of suffering and sin—and I encourage others to avoid them.

When I am free, I will live a clean life, because I am already practicing that now. I am preparing for the future by making the present count. Every moment matters, and if I live with care and mindfulness, success will follow.

For me, Buddhism is a straight path towards enlightenment, realized in the present moment. I am committed to living fully in the now, and to practicing virtue every day. I believe that true change comes from within, and that by changing our minds, we change our lives. I vow to continue on this path of transformation, guided by the wisdom of the Buddha.

Sophia

9.4.    Peace in Prison

I regret causing harm to others, but I do not regret being detained. Prison prevented me from being led astray by illusions and forced me to confront my own self— deception. During my time alone with this deception, I witnessed many strange and unsettling truths. It became clear to me that, in order to overcome this self—deception, I needed help.

That help came through Buddhism. Without the guidance of the Buddha Dharma, I wouldn’t have even noticed something as simple as my breath. I never truly paid attention to it until it was almost too late.

Each day, I struggled with the greed, hatred, and selfishness of my ego. But with each passing minute, I became more aware of my true self. This awakening became a powerful tool, like a sharp sword, cutting through my delusions. I learned to master my mind, and through this process, I realized that if I had not been imprisoned,

I would never have faced these delusions or learned how to combat them. In a way, I was freer in prison than I ever could have been in society, where I might have been physically free but still trapped in the prison of my desires and senses.

William

9.5.    Finding Happiness

Many years ago, I aspired to be a rebellious hero, embodying the “cool” image of youth culture. I drank heavily, smoked opium, and sought to stand out within my social circle. I wore dark clothes, drove flashy sports cars, and positioned myself as a key member of my group. In doing so, I missed out on many opportunities—like pursuing a career in college, managing an Australian company and experiencing genuine love and honesty.

After being imprisoned, my perspective shifted. I longed for a simple, normal life—a steady job, a loving wife, a child, and the responsibilities that come with family and society. But now, I no longer chase those dreams. I’ve realized that when I become attached to such external expectations, I merely set myself up for further desires and disappointments. There is no ultimate source of happiness that will provide lasting peace.

Now, I no longer search for happiness outside of myself. I’ve discovered that true happiness is always within me. When I feel frustrated or disappointed, I recognize it as fleeting or illusory, and I let go of it. These emotions dissolve once I stop clinging to them. I see that happiness is not something to be pursued or found elsewhere; it’s already present within me, beyond the distractions of the external world.

This realization has filled me with gratitude for the happiness I’ve already found, and I hope that all prisoners come to understand how to break free from the cycle of samsara within these prison walls. Be happy now, and don’t wait until tomorrow or until you are free from prison, for everything is impermanent.

Andrew

9.6.    Prisoners

The majority of prisoners in the United States struggle with issues such as drug and alcohol addiction, low levels of education, unemployment, and a high prevalence of AIDS. Many come from unhappy or broken families, with some having parents, siblings, or children who have also been incarcerated. Prison policies play a significant role in shaping the future of these individuals. Overall, the conditions of prisoners can be summarized as follows:

1. About two million people are imprisoned in the United
2. America now holds six to ten times more criminals than other industrialized countries.
3. In the US, one person out of every 150 people is imprisoned every day.
4. American prisons have become the largest “home for the elderly” in the world. In 1994, California detained 5,000 people over the age of According to the detention rate in 1998, the number of older people in custody will be 50,000 by 2005.

5. Billions of dollars have been transferred from the national treasury to private companies to design, build and maintain prisons. These are happening while fourteen million children in the United States are living in
6. The tremendous increase in the number of prisoners in the US can be explained largely by the nonviolent criminals. Seventy—one percent of the people imprisoned in 1996 were convicted of nonviolent crimes (including 30 percent for drug use and 29 percent for property destruction).
7. The growth rate of female prisoners has nearly doubled in the past two One third of female prisoners were convicted for drug use.
8. Since 1991, the level of violent crime in the US has decreased by 20 percent, while the number of prisoners detained in prisons or prisons has nearly
9. Over 94 percent of nearly 2 million prisoners will

return to civilian life.

Ven. T.N. Giới Hương

9.7.    Nervous

Many former prisoners struggled with transformation when approaching life outside. They often find it difficult to get a job with a criminal record, especially if that prisoner has left society for decades. Many inmates said they were nervous for months before they were released because they had no homes, money, transportation, no friends or family support, no promises of a job in the prison, when they still have to pay damages and parole orders.

Also depending on each person’s career, some people have stabilized their life after being released from prison and returned to participate in volunteer activities in prison. They begin to live a bright and happy life.

Anthony

9.8.    Release From Prison

After graduating from high school, I set out to learn a trade, hoping to become either a worker or a teacher. But instead, I went down a darker path, turning to alcohol and drugs. This became the most sorrowful chapter of my life. The soul of a prisoner torments me, filled with regret from the past and endless thoughts about the future.

I have now prepared myself for life after being released from prison, ready to face the reality that lies ahead. I confront the present moment, carrying with me the regret of yesterday and the uncertainty of tomorrow. Despite feeling disheartened at times, I walked through the trap of fear and discovered the strength of faith within myself, realizing that I am capable of achieving whatever I set my heart to.

My battle has been one of forgiveness. I learned that love has the power to heal all wounds, a mysterious and surprising power that I never fully understood before. I began by forgiving myself, and from there, I was able to let go. Love saved my life in prison and continues to protect me.

I’ve learned to embrace the fact that even in the darkest of times, survival and sustenance are still possible. While I must leave the prison experience behind, it will always be a part of me.

Prison shapes the identity of its inmates, and there is no escaping that reality. Though prisoners often have few choices, the most important one is how they allow their circumstances to shape them. True freedom, I’ve realized, is found within ourselves. I am hopeful that a bright future awaits me. While I was in prison, I was miserable and certainly didn’t want to be there. But looking back now, I am grateful because prison changed my life.

Some of my fellow prisoners continue to practice after being released, though others I’ve lost contact with once they returned home. Regardless, I know that Buddhism has had a profound and positive impact on us all. My Buddhist brothers and sisters shared so much with me, and I saw the truth of their words in their letters. I believe that the seed of the Buddha Dharma is planted in their hearts, and I hope it grows to guide them as they step into life beyond prison.

Ms. Sahirah

9.9.    Worry

I was born in Waynesville, North Carolina, near the Cherokee Indian lands in the Blue Ridge Mountain range we call West Carolina. This region borders with the states of Georgia, Alabama, and Tennessee. I am the oldest of nine. I grew up in a sick family. My father was an alcoholic and violent. Dad often had to travel far for work. He got a job digging a tunnel for Blue Ridge National Parkway. When Dad was at home, he used to treat my mother very cruelly. He hit me more than other siblings because I was the oldest and had the most responsibility.

We were in an old mountain house. There was no electricity and no pipes or drains in the house. We often took the bucket to take water at a spring a few hundred meters from home. For all heating and cooking we used wood stoves and we had to cut trees down for firewood by ourselves. Clothes had to be washed by hand. Most clothes were handed down from the oldest child to the smallest child. We went hunting and we canned vegetables grown in the garden. In the mountains, there were bears, deer, black panthers, racoons, groundhogs, rabbits, and fish. We tanned (peel, claw) the skin with ash and water to clean the fur, then we dried it. We used the animal skins to make shoes and sandals. My mother cared for us with all her heart. She worked seasonally, laboring in tobacco or tomato fields from early morning until late evening. I was responsible for taking care of my younger brothers and sisters.

I drank alcohol for the first time before I went to school. Since the age of sixteen, I have been an alcoholic. I have a feeling that my alcoholism is hereditary. My behavior is inherited from my family. I became angry, violent, and self—destructive. I hated my parents. I hated my father because he beat me and disliked my mother because she endured such a man over the years. I left my family when I was seventeen. During those years, I worked in construction jobs, driving heavy trucks, manual labor, working a sawmill, and many other jobs. I married at twenty—one. The marriage lasted five years. We have two children, one girl and one boy. For twenty—four years, I haven’t seen them.

My alcoholism got worse and worse. Sometimes I got so drunk that I didn’t know anything. At one point, when I was drunk, I became violent and received a ten—year sentence when I was forty years old. I also played with cocaine. I consider myself a lone wolf.

In 1990, my first experience in prison was at a facility known as “The Rock,” home to some of the most violent and hardened inmates. I witnessed many brutal events, including stabbings and beatings with iron pipes, and I was involved in two fights myself. We were often slandered, threatened, and sometimes beaten up by the prison guards. The inner workings of the correctional system are complex, and prisoners often seek reforms that require compassion and care from the authorities, along with a genuine effort to assist in their rehabilitation.

It’s like putting an animal in a cage and mistreating it daily; when the door finally opens, it will likely attack. The same holds true for prisoners—years of mistreatment foster anger, which can only be suppressed while incarcerated. But once released, that anger often explodes into society. If prison staff treated inmates with care and respect, fewer would return to prison. Unfortunately, the prison environment often causes distrust, as prisoners learn to deceive each other, forming distinct groups based on their adherence to prison rules. Some follow the prison’s regulations, while others create their own “criminal code,” a kind of subculture within the walls.

In 1994, I found myself at the Avon Park Correctional Institution. I was given the job of charging water heaters in the kitchen and washhouses. During my free time, I spent hours in a small 7x10 meter yard, tending to some flowers I had planted. Surrounded by a high barbed—wire fence, I would sit, watch the flowers grow, listen to the birds, and reflect on the trees outside. For the first time, I truly observed my life and asked myself profound questions about my existence. It felt like an awakening, a moment of clarity where I questioned my purpose and realized I no longer wanted to return to prison.

This led me to seek a deeper meaning in life. I knew I needed to change. Having never been raised with a spiritual foundation, I now felt the urgency to find one. I turned to the library and began exploring world religions. It was Buddhism that resonated with me, offering practical teachings based on self—reflection rather than dogma. I applied to change my religion to Buddhism and began receiving Buddhist texts from China and Japan. As I read, I began to practice meditation, which began transforming my mindset. I stopped engaging in negative activities and became an exemplary Buddhist prisoner, even as some of my fellow inmates mocked me. But I remained focused on my practice, turning their taunts into sources of encouragement.

I also volunteered for various educational programs, such as Managing Anger, Victim Awareness, Family Development, Life Skills, and the 12—Step Recovery program. In a special section of the prison, I worked with a group of about forty fellow inmates, most of whom were recovering addicts.  My experiences with  them greatly

accelerated my own recovery, as addicts often benefit most from the stories of those who have been through similar struggles.

After spending ten years in prison, I was released from the Florida Correctional Institution on December 22, 2000. Walking out of the prison gates, I felt a mix of anxiety and uncertainty. But when I arrived in Gainesville, I was met by Master K.C. Walpole from the Gateless Gate Meditation Center, whose presence immediately brought me a sense of relief. He helped me with everything I needed, and by December 28, I was attending a five—day retreat at the center. The retreat helped alleviate much of the fear, anger, pain, and loneliness I had been carrying.

I am deeply grateful for the support I received from people like Keith Smith, who allowed me to stay at his house, and from the Kwan Um Meditation Center, which provided me with books and resources, including The Compass of Zen by Zen Master Seung Sahm, which deepened my understanding of Buddhist teachings and practice. Above all, I am grateful to my teacher, Mr. K.C. Walpole, whose guidance and compassion have been invaluable to my journey.

As I dedicated myself to my practice, I learned to live more simply—sleeping late when needed, eating when necessary, and meditating in peaceful surroundings. The support and compassion I received from monastics, from the prison system, and from everyone who has helped me along the way have transformed me into the person I am today. For that, I am eternally thankful.

Mitch Medford

 9.10.    The Same Circumstance

I’ve recently been released from a maximum— security prison and faced unexpected challenges, causing harm and creating new problems for both myself and others. I want to share my experience, not only to help others in similar situations—those emerging from years of solitary confinement—but also to provide insight on how to navigate and avoid these challenges.

I know I am not the only one facing such difficulties, and the mistakes I made led to negative consequences and I fully acknowledge my responsibility in this. Over time, I have come to understand the Dharma, focused on my practice, and shared it with trusted Buddhist friends.

Three years after my release, I still struggled with fear and doubt. For some, these emotions stem from leaving a place that felt safe and controlled, like the confined, predictable space of a prison cell where meals are brought to you and you can listen to the radio.

I spent twenty—six years in prison and made many enemies. We were placed among them and told that we would sink if we didn’t swim. To be honest, I sometimes miss the comfort of that old cell. But I also long to visit my mother and embrace her, as it’s been over four years since I last saw her. However, my family has informed me that visits are not possible, and my workplace rejected me when I sought employment. I felt hopeless.

For years in prison, I often wondered how people could become so detached, so willing to bury themselves in their misery. How could they lose all interest or care? Now, I understand. I recognize that the responsibility lies with me. Every day, I must be mindful of the suffering I caused, and remember those who, like me, created their own hells on earth while imprisoned in solitary confinement. This has driven me to understand others and to be compassionate.

Looking back over the past five years, I have learned valuable lessons from the mistakes I made. Some might laugh and dismiss it as ignorance, but I’ve learned to see the bigger picture. I can no longer bear to view people as others did before. I recognize that everyone has strengths and qualities I now want to nurture and protect. I no longer want to cause harm but seek to help, to relieve suffering. I understand that if I can address my own pain and its causes, I can guide others like me towards healing.

I must admit that I have not done this perfectly. But I now understand how a prisoner can lose all hope and care, becoming numb to the world. What we can do in such situations is share our fears and emotions with others who understand. This is part of my journey of study and practice. Each day, I see the benefits of my practice, and I believe you, too, are important in this world. It is my responsibility to do what I can to alleviate the suffering of others. Maybe all we can do is sit quietly, sharing our pain until we find hope. But know this: you are not alone. You are understood, and together, we can help others by showing them care and compassion.

May you find happiness and the causes of happiness. May you be free from suffering and the causes of suffering. May you find peace. The Buddha Dharma offers us guidance, a light in the midst of pain and confusion.

The practice of Dharma is gradual and requires us to address our karmic hindrances. Although I’ve experienced many positive changes, there are still subtle obstacles to overcome.

Some people try to eliminate compassion and distance themselves from those who have harmed others. I do not believe this is the way. The perpetrator and the victim both suffer. True compassion is to care for both. Human value is inherent in the person, not their actions, although they are still responsible for them. Every person has Buddha nature, which is inherently good, despite their negative actions. We should embrace this spirit of Buddhism and act accordingly. Our sinful actions arise from the seeds of desire, hatred, and delusion, and these must be addressed. We should offer kindness both to prisoners and to their victims.

Mercy doesn’t mean excusing destructive actions. We must love the person who committed these acts, ensuring they are in an environment where the conditions for evil no longer arise. Prisoners need psychological care, physical support, and the opportunity to reconnect with their loved ones in order to overcome the roots of their harmful deeds.

Bryan

9.11.    How to Live

Typically, when someone is granted a pardon, they receive $50 and a bus ticket from the prison. To re—enter the free world and reintegrate into society, they must start fresh from that moment.

For me, repeating the offense after my release was a result of the choices I made. The decisions I made in the past led me to where I am now, and the choices I make moving forward will determine whether I become one of the 70 percent of offenders who return to prison.

In prison, inmates often have little control over their daily lives—what they eat, what they wear, where they work, when they practice or worship. These decisions are largely made by the correctional institution. However, we still have choices, and these choices are crucial. We must value ourselves and take responsibility not only for our past actions but also for our future. We can leave here unchanged, just as we arrived, or we can leave with a commitment to make things different—not only for ourselves but hopefully for everyone we encounter. We have the power to change our weaknesses. We can become more aware of our emotions and the impact of our actions. We can expand our education and set goals that will lead to positive outcomes in the future.

Matthew

9.12.    Gratitude

Dianne points out that sometimes I complain when I get frustrated by things not going the way I want them to. This reflects my selfishness, making me the center of everything. I’ve noticed myself slipping back into old habits, overthinking things without making any decisions or taking action. When I reflect on my heart, I see how easy it is to return to old thought patterns and wallow in self— pity: “I’m a criminal, no one will hire me.” Of course, she’s right. I was searching for a solution, and eventually, I found an employer who hired me. I’m deeply grateful for this opportunity. I’ve been honest about my past, and over the past six years, I’ve genuinely changed. I believe my employer has recognized this sincerity. I’ve been working here for more than two months now, and I’m happy with my job. I’m thankful to my boss for giving me this chance.

Through meditation, I began to understand why my mind is so greedy. For instance, I find myself wanting a perfect girlfriend or a new motorbike. I questioned why I fixate on these desires. I know that the pleasures of this world don’t bring lasting happiness—they only lead to suffering.

Eventually, I realized there was no need to hold on to these cravings. Why? Because I already have what I need. I have a roof over my head, food, clothes, furniture, and the kindness of others. Letting go of desire became more important, especially with the support of my Buddhist friends and teachers, who have given me guidance to transform my negative thoughts. We should practice Dharma and learn to be content with what we have.

One evening, after returning home from work, I shoveled snow. Sometimes, I allow myself the time to enjoy the beauty around me. It was a beautiful winter night, with snowflakes gently falling and the moonlight illuminating the white landscape. I paused, took a deep breath, and reveled in the peaceful scene, smiling at the miracle of being alive. This is something I had forgotten to appreciate. Last year, at this time, I wasn’t allowed to go outside at night because I was locked behind four walls. What a remarkable difference!

I am grateful for life and for the people who are destined to be in it with me. I bow with gratitude to everyone I meet.

Dianne

9.13.    The Liberation Prison Project

The Liberation Prison Project⁴² offers spiritual advice and teachings, as well as books and materials, to people in prison interested in exploring, studying, and practicing Buddhism.

A Tibetan Buddhist organization and social services project affiliated with the Foundation for the Preservation of the Mahayana Tradition, since 1996 the project has supported the Buddhist practice of over 20,000 prisoners.

The project started in 1996 with a letter from Arturo Esquer, a young Mexican—American ex—gangster serving three life sentences at Pelican Bay, one of California’s maximum—security prisons.

Arturo had read Introduction to Tantra (Wisdom Publications), a book by Lama Yeshe, the founder of FPMT, and was moved by Lama’s talk of compassion. He wrote to the organization wanting to learn more.

Arturo Esquer wrote the following lines in his autobiography entitled, Finding a Way to Not Forget Someone: The Transformation of a Mexican Bandit.

 

42. Đề án Nhà Tù Giải thoát (The Liberation Prison Project). Thanh Liên translated from English into Vietnamese, Hồng Như Ven. Giới Hương translated into English from Vietnamese source.

Xin xem: http://www.thuvienhoasen.org/deannhatugiaithoat.htm

This autobiography was reprinted with the permission of

Mandala Magazine, November 1997.

“I was born on February 4, 1976, in Montebello, Los Angeles, California. I am the sixth child of a mother of seven children: five boys and two girls. We are Mexican.

“My mother, Lorraine and my five brothers live in a small two—bedroom apartment with one of my mother’s boyfriends. I never met my father. One of my brothers said that he was in prison. That’s all I know.

“For everyone, respect is the key. If you are not respected, you are not a human being. That is clear to me. Because of the fights I attended, everyone in my neighborhood showed me utmost respect, so people never looked at me with unpleasant eyes or talked me disrespectfully. Obviously the most respected people are the guys who are gang members.

[At the age of eleven, Arturo joined a gang in the surrounding area.] “It’s getting more and more violent, and it makes a perfect sense. This is the way to behave in life. At all costs, you need to live strong, live without fear, must be respected by others. You must respect others. I did that.

“I tried to become like one of the lead roles in movies like The Godfather and Scarface, characters who will never accept anyone playing dirty with them, taking care of family and friends and respecting others, but when needed will not hesitate to kill anyone, even family, friends, or enemies.

“The more respect I received from my neighbors, the more authoritative I can be able to help and save others when needed.

“The more respect I received from my neighbors, the more authority I had to help and support others when they needed it.

[At the age of twelve, Arturo was sent to Juvenile Hall for a robbery—related crime. His wrongdoings escalated. At sixteen, he was sentenced to three life sentences for conspiring to murder. Arturo is currently a prisoner at Pelican Bay Prison.]

“In prison I have a lot of time to learn and think. When I understand the suffering of my people in Mexico or here in America, I begin to develop a strong desire to do something. And when I think of people who have money, or have authority, or other people who have considered Mexicans as dirt or wild animals, intense hatred begins to build up in me. I thought: ‘How can a country like the United States, which talks so much about freedom for all people, have a law like the one that was passed in California, denying medical and educational assistance for Mexican women and children?’ Even this country is not theirs! There must be a law that forces the Whites back to Europe!

“One day a friend lent me a Zen book written by a Japanese samurai master. That book really resonated with me, and what my friend explained strongly affected me. ‘People thirst for the truth in this world, because only when the truth is found, will we put an end to our restlessness.’ He also said that every living being has a pure Buddha nature and is one with the entire universe. I find that idea incredibly fascinating.

“First of all, I thought of using meditation (Zen)

as a discipline to refine my character and to help me become steadfast in my efforts to help Mexicans crush the oppressors. But my thoughts were starting to become contradictory and for the first time I wondered if my lifestyle, the gang activities, really helped Mexicans? This wasn’t easy because I’ve always been fully committed 110 percent to my way of life, even if it means paying the ultimate price.

“In the library, I came across a book by Lama Yeshe. The book pierced my heart and slapped my face at the same time. I was forced to realize that the gangster lifestyle only brought more trouble to the people of my country. I have to make a choice, that is clear: either follow the Buddha’s path or continue to cling to my old way of life.

“I made my first Buddhist beads using Cheerios, the round cereal pieces! I filled my days and nights with practice and study. I enjoyed waking up early before dawn when the prison was quiet, which is a rare thing here. Whether I leave or not doesn’t matter. The important thing is that no matter where I am, I should be able to help others.

“I was deeply moved by Lama Yeshe’s Introduction to Tantra and its teachings on compassion. [Arturo wrote to the Foundation for the Preservation of the Mahayana Tradition (FPMT), which was then based at the Land of Medicine Buddha in Soquel, California, saying ‘I am writing in the hope of receiving regular issues of Mandala magazine. If possible, I would like to personally embrace the Buddhist path of life.’]”

Arturo Esquer

Arturo has been greatly assisted in the practice by

 

Bhikkhunī Robina Courtin of FPMT (Foundation for the Preservation of the Mahayana Tradition) and by the Liberation Prison Project of which she is the managing director. The project helps prisoners in the United States and Australia, sending them books on Buddhist literature, guiding practitioners in practicing and visiting them.

9.14.    Tie a Yellow Ribbon ‘Round the Old Oak Tree

This song was quite popular among people in the 1970s. “Tie a Yellow Ribbon ‘Round the Ole Oak Tree” is by Irwin Levine and L. Russell Brown.

The song tells the story of a husband who has spent three years in prison and is now being released. He has a wife and two children, but they’ve had almost four years without contact. During this time, his wife has found a lover. He writes a letter announcing his release, asking that if his wife has forgiven his past mistakes and is willing to let him reunite with his family, she should tie ten to twenty yellow ribbons around the oak tree in front of their house.

When the bus passes by, if he sees yellow ribbons, he will get off and return home to reunite, but if not, he will leave, which means he will not receive forgiveness from his wife and children. But oh my! When the bus is about to reach the end of the alley, hundreds of yellow ribbons flutter in the wind and a song is sung in the air as follows:

“Tie A Yellow Ribbon ‘Round the Old Oak Tree” (Irwin Levine and L. Russell Brown)⁴³

43. “Tie A Yellow Ribbon Round the Old Oak Tree” Irwin Levine

I’m coming home I’ve done my time. And I have to know what is or isn’t mine. If you received my letter

Telling you I’d soon be free Then you’d know just what to do If you still want me

If you still want me

Oh tie a yellow ribbon ‘Round the old oak tree It’s been three long years Do you still want me

If I don’t see a yellow ribbon Round the old oak tree

I’ll stay on the bus, forget about us Put the blame on me

If I don’t see a yellow ribbon ‘Round the old oak tree

Bus driver please look for me

Cause I couldn’t bear to see what I might see I’m really still in prison

And my love she holds the key

A simple yellow ribbon’s all I need to set me free 

and L. Russell Brown. https://www.lyrics.com/lyric/1635289/Dawn/Tie+a+Yellow+Rib- bon+%27Round+the+Ole+Oak+Tree

I wrote and told her please Oh tie a yellow ribbon ‘Round the old oak tree It’s been three long years Do you still want me

If I don’t see a yellow ribbon ‘Round the old oak tree

I’ll stay on the bus, forget about us Put the blame on me

If I don’t see a yellow ribbon ‘Round the old oak tree

Now the whole damn bus is cheering

And I can’t believe I see A hundred yellow ribbons

Round the old, the old oak tree

Tie a ribbon ‘round the old oak tree

Ven. Giới Hương having lunch by the Green Bay River (Green Bay Correctional Institution) in Wisconsin, waiting to guide prisoners

                                                 ************

Chapter 10

CONCLUSION

L

ama Thubten Yeshe: “If you’re a human being,

it doesn’t matter whether others think you’re a

human being or not. You’re still a human being.”

Yes, whether we are prisoners or not, we are still human. In the past, it was clear that I (Venerable Giới Hương) wanted to avoid fear of the correctional institution and violent criminal personalities. Prisoners’ confinement, iron bars as guards, and cold cells for inmates are something far—fetched and scary for most of us, especially women, but over a period of contact (even a short time) with the inmates through correspondence, I realized the quality of the gentle nature and enlightened Buddha essence in them, just like us. One moment of ignorance led them to commit a crime, and now they are spending a lifetime regretting it behind cold bars.

We should not label inmates as rapists, thieves, assailants, or murderers and then ignore or isolate them. In fact, they are people with much experience of suffering, and a rich spiritual life. Prisoners’ insights, shared through letters or face—to—face, actually enhance what we have learned in the temple, school, and society. We listen to a certain prisoner who grows up in poverty, with their parents drinking, causing them to commit a crime and then they go to jail. Hearing another prisoner share his experiences of life on the streets since he was just seven years old, smoking cigarettes and engaging in robbery, will help us gain a deeper understanding of social realities, politics, and ethics.

America is a prosperous and beautiful country, but alongside its towering buildings, there are also images of poverty, homelessness, crime, unethical behavior, and widespread unemployment. These reflect a certain side of the reality of society and economics.

Having met with prisoners through Dharma talks and correspondences, I found that most of them are sincere, enthusiastic, eager to improve, smart, and full of potential. Although there are many obstacles, challenges, struggles and failures, they try to unleash their human potential. Thus, prisons are a good environment, a place for them to try and find the truth. The harsh prison environment, with its suffering, stress, and insecurity, drives prisoners to seek mental escape, find spiritual refuge, and train their minds. As a result, many American prisoners turn to religion and Buddhism. Thus, time in jail becomes a valuable opportunity for spiritual growth. It can be seen as a key to unlocking the door to their spiritual journey

The correctional insitutions have changed people. There are also many who cannot be redeemed, and others whose situation continues to deteriorate. But for some Buddhist prisoners, if they had not been detained, perhaps their life would be worse. Of course, if they continue living in debauchery and are unaware of Buddhism, the path they follow is wild, crazy, and dangerous. If they don’t get a chance to escape that depraved way of life, they will either remain trapped in it or perish. Now, they remain incarcerated, counting their prayers and grateful for the time in confinement. Away from the toxic environment, they have been changed, transformed, and have rediscovered themselves. How much better they have become! Yes, prisoners truly can change. By practicing Buddhism in such a violent and hostile setting, the cultivation of compassion becomes not only essential but also deeply valuable.

I’ve encountered many prisoners who are truly spirited. Hearing them speak about their struggles to overcome challenges, I met those enduring even more difficult circumstances than I could have imagined. This has been an inspiration to me. Some prisoners are battling AIDS, cancer, extreme poverty, or the trauma of being victims of rape, yet they continue to strive for improvement. Meanwhile, we, who are healthy and free, should make the most of our time and resources, avoiding complacency and not wasting a single moment

There’s a fascinating story, “The Bet,” by Anton Chekhov, which I learned about in my World Literature class at Milwaukee Area Technical College in Wisconsin. The story involves a banker who bets a young lawyer that if he can remain in solitary confinement for five years, he will be rewarded with two million dollars. The young lawyer confidently responds that he could stay even longer, up to fifteen years. The bet was set to begin at noon on November 14, 1870, and end at noon on November 14, 1885. The young lawyer was to be confined in a small, old warehouse behind the banker’s garden, with food being brought to him daily by a gardener through a window. He was not allowed to leave the locked warehouse.

In the first year of imprisonment, the young lawyer spent his days eating and playing the piano. By the second and third years, he requested reading material, and with the banker’s permission, the gardener brought him philosophical, religious, and linguistic books. Over the next four years, the lawyer read more than 600 books. As the years passed, the variety of books continued to grow, and by the end of fifteen years, the lawyer had accumulated a vast collection covering many different subjects. Then, as the end of the term drew near, with only an hour left in his confinement, the banker began to regret his foolish bet. Fearing the large sum of money he would have to pay, he contemplated killing the lawyer to avoid the financial burden.

At 3:00 a.m., with everyone asleep and a storm raging outside, the banker saw an opportunity. The guard had sought shelter from the rain, leaving the path clear for him to act. Stealthily, he crept toward the warehouse. In the dim light, he saw a flickering candle and noticed the prisoner resting his head on the table, surrounded by a disordered room. The lawyer, now so thin he resembled a walking skeleton, had long, unkempt hair, resembling a man much older than his forty years. On the table lay a small piece of paper. The banker glanced at it quickly and read:

“Tomorrow, at the appointed time, I will be free. I have earned the right to live in the outside world. Before I leave this room, I want to say a few words to you. My conscience is clear, and I stand before God, who sees all. In the past fifteen years, I have learned a lot. Through books, I have known many worlds and gained profound knowledge. Your books gave me wisdom. I know I’m smarter than you. You were foolish and went wrong. You do not understand the truth, or the folly hidden in beauty. I refuse to accept your two million dollars. Can your money buy wisdom? No, it cannot. Tomorrow, I will break our bet by leaving here before noon, so the money will remain yours.”

Upon reading these words, the old man was so moved that he bent down to kiss the prisoner. Tears rolled down the prisoner’s face.

Around noon the next day, the guard informed his boss that the prisoner had escaped and his whereabouts were unknown. To prevent any rumors from spreading, the old man quietly took the note and tucked it away.

The story holds deep meaning in life. The prison in “The Bet” can be seen as symbolic of any prison in America. If a prisoner uses their time in confinement for a noble purpose, they may find more freedom to achieve their goals than those caught up in the demands of social obligations. As the prisoner in “The Bet” declared: “Money cannot buy wisdom. Thank you for providing me with an environment to unlock my intellectual potential.”

In American prisons, there are many good conditions that are effective for practice. The prison environment is relatively clean and tidy and most of the prisoners look healthy and neatly dressed. They attend many training classes and have time to practice in the chapel, working to improve their character. Venerable Tonen always said: “If a person doesn’t change inside, it doesn’t matter where they go. They can go to the moon, and if they haven’t changed inside, they’ll be the first person on the moon in jail.”

Similarly, we are imprisoned by our own selves— by ignorance and anger, which act as cold bars. Some inmates are confined by physical fences, while others are trapped by wealth, ego, drugs, alcohol, food, and other worldly attractions. These things draw us into cycles of happiness, anger, love, hate, sadness, craving, frustration, and anxiety. Drifting through the cycle of samsara, our ignorance makes us vulnerable to depression driven by desires. We hold onto things we believe will bring eternal happiness—money, beauty, fame, material possessions and the self—yet these attachments only prolong our suffering. True happiness can only be found by changing our mindset and freeing ourselves from the shackles of desire, anger, and ignorance. Without this transformation, no matter where we go to escape the world—even if we travel to the moon—we will remain imprisoned. A prisoner today can become a saint tomorrow by changing and escaping the prison of their own mind.

Buddhism is not merely a religion; it is an ideal of service grounded in the wisdom of non—self and compassion. How can we remain idle when there is so much suffering, hatred, ambition, and injustice surrounding us? Buddhism dedicates itself to life through acts of charity, spreading Dharma in prisons, hospitals, leprosy camps, and remote villages, in order to share the Buddha’s message of liberation and happiness with everyone. Meditation is a common practice among prisoners. It transforms disturbing and jealous thoughts into tranquility, gentleness, and insight. Meditation truly helps prisoners shift from chaos and selfish perspectives to becoming awakened, calm, and compassionate.

Anyone has the ability to transform their own mind. We can overcome negativity and cultivate the positive aspects of our Buddha—nature. The Buddha taught the method of mastering the mind based on his own experience. One of the Buddha’s earliest teachings, the Four Noble Truths, reveals that our existence and sense of self are the sources of the pain we create. However, we can end our suffering by letting go of our thirst for ignorance. Through meditation on emptiness and non—self, we can free ourselves from attachments. All phenomena are impermanent, without inherent nature, and there is no “I” or “myself” in them. With the methods of contemplating the four characteristics in the Theravada Suttas (suffering, empty, impermanence, and non—self,⁴⁴ the four characteristics in the Mahayana Sutras (true permanence, true joy, true self, and pure truth),⁴⁵ we can come to understand the profound suffering of both ourselves and others, cultivating compassion and serving sentient beings, with the ultimate goal of seeking true happiness. The Buddha taught us to be diligent, not complacent, in order to break free from the cycle of reincarnation and find genuine happiness. This is our choice. If we only dwell in frustration, anger, sadness, crime, and hatred, we will fail to see the altruism, joy, and 

44. Please read The Cycle of Life (Vòng Luân Hồi), Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhà sách Phương Đông: Tủ Sách Bảo Anh Lạc,
45. Please read Rebirth Views in the Śūraṅgama Sūtra (Luân Hồi trong Lăng Kính Lăng Nghiêm), Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhà Xuất bản Văn Hoá Sài gòn: Tủ Sách Bảo Anh Lạc, 2008.

goodness that lie hidden beneath, shining and sparkling like diamonds. They are always present, waiting for us to recognize and reflect upon them.

Compassion is the greatest force on this planet. It has the power to alleviate suffering, bring happiness and even create miracles. Even if we offer material gifts to the poor or donate parts of our own body, if these acts are not motivated by compassion, they hold no true benefit. In this life, there is much giving, caring for others and sacrificing to help, but without love and understanding, we lose our Bodhi roots. Without compassion, what may appear as acts of kindness can become driven by self— interest or ego (as when we give to those who are kind to us but withhold from those who hate us).

Regardless of color, race, or religion, people should love and understand one another. We share the same sky and live on the same planet, and as such, we are bound by communal karma, co—living, and co—existing. If we adopt a perspective rooted in cause and effect, the prison system will reduce the number of inmates involved in racism, segregation, and discrimination. Religions will find common ground in the practices of love, understanding, compassion, and service. Buddhism offers a realistic and pragmatic view of the cycle of samsara, acknowledging the impermanence of life. Buddhism also emphasizes the importance of unconditional compassion, which is the essence of our Buddha—nature. In the Dhammapada, the Buddha taught: “Conquer the angry one by not getting angry (by loving—kindness); conquer the wicked by goodness; conquer the stingy by generosity, and the liar by speaking the truth.”⁴⁶

Clearly, the government’s laws impose severe penalties for hate and discrimination, but it is difficult to extinguish the source of jealousy caused by ignorant prejudice. The Most Venerable Nhất Hạnh in Peace is Every Step said that “The essence of love and compassion is the understanding of each other. The ability to recognize other people’s physical, material, and mental suffering, to take us ‘deep inside’. If we gain the ability to see through the eyes of others, we will see no difference between them and us, because all have the same needs: to avoid misery, joy, and happiness.”

To combat this destructive nature of jealousy, we must use the greatest tools, the sharpest sword, and the most effective remedy to serve (labor or charity to earn merit). Our service to others is the growth of love and compassion in our lives. Through service, we can overcome hate and anger in the world. And most importantly, through service, we gain insight and understanding of the true nature of things. Engaging in service is one of the main focuses of each religion. Our spirit is reflected in our daily lives, helping to dispel our worries and suffering. Through selfless service, we can transcend egoism, cultivate nobility, and find harmony with others.

In his Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech, the 14th

 

46. Dhammapada, Verse 223. Chapter 17. “Angry.” Ven. Thích Minh Châu translated into English. Vietnamese Buddhist Research Institute. Việt Nam. http://www.buddhismtoday.com/viet/kinh/pali/phap- cu1.htm

 

Dalai Lama, Tenzin Gyatso⁴⁷ said, “Because we all share a life on this small earth, we must live in harmony with each other and with our nature. This is not a dream but a necessity. We depend on each other in many ways. We do not have to live in a single community and forget what is happening outside in other communities. We need to help each other when we are in trouble and share the good opportunities we have. I tell you as a person, a simple ordinary monk. If you believe what I say is valuable, I hope you will try it for yourself and practice it, then you will see the results.”

Whenever we commit a selfish or immoral act, we do not expect it to bring peace, understanding, and happiness to this world. Instead, it adds confusion, jealousy, and suffering. Bliss is a state of tranquil lightness and should be embraced regularly. Therefore, we should use gentle words, forgive, and appreciate others. When others are in need, especially those outside our community, we should go and help them. We must help them with love, compassion, and understanding. By doing so, we will break through strongholds that distinguish religion, race, culture, and eventually, our world will be peaceful and happiness.

Tojin explained that “It is difficult to be a Buddhist in prison, especially in an American prison. I honestly think that most people who find Buddhism while in prison and stay with it for even a short period do attain or achieve some level of awakening. We are glad to see that we are making

47. Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech, the 14th Dalai Lama, Tenzin Gyatso https://vn.dalailama.com/messages/acceptance—speeches/no- bel—peace—prize/nobel—peace—prize—nobel—lecture

 

progress on the path of the Buddha’s teachings. I didn’t understand why I was in prison, but now I understand. Everything has its cause.”

The prison is created by people. It can be a dreadful hell to avoid, or it can become a sacred space where prisoners practice, following the Buddha’s teachings to free themselves from ignorance, attachment, and deceit. The aspiration to practice, the vow to become a vegetarian amidst the chaotic prison world and the lack of nutritious food is a true challenge. It is true that the lotus blooms in the fire. A difficult vow to uphold in such a hellish place.

May the ambitions and obstacles be transformed, and the dawn of future awakening remain with the prisoners. May all prisoners be like lotuses blooming in the dark mud, like the bright orange uniforms standing out against the gray prison walls.

What wishes did the Buddha and bodhisattvas have? In their practice, the bodhisattvas chose to be in the most difficult and painful circumstances, often in the darkest places, to guide sentient beings. They helped them abandon their delusions, so that they could awaken and attain liberation.

A disciple asked his master, “Where will the master go after you die?”

The master answered, “I go to hell.” The disciple was surprised: “Why?”

The master answered, “Because that place needs me the most.”

Ksitigarbha Bodhisattva made a vow: “If there is a being in hell who has not yet become a Buddha, I will

remain. If there are no longer any suffering beings, only

then will I become a Buddha.”

What an eternal example of a great vow, one for us to respectfully follow. Clearly, while government laws impose severe punishments for hate and discrimination, it remains difficult to eliminate the root of jealousy, which is driven by ignorance. As the Most Venerable Thích Nhất Hạnh said in Peace is Every Step: “The essence of love and compassion is understanding one another. It is the ability to recognize the physical, material, and mental suffering of others, taking us ‘deep inside.’ When we learn to see through the eyes of others, we recognize that there is no diference between them and us, because we all share the same fundamental need: to avoid suffering and to find joy and happiness.”

The serene Zen garden is adorned with the practices of Bodhi.

Namo the Sanctuary Ornament King Bodhisattva Mahatat

Inmates at Green Bay Correctional Institution

created Buddha cards to celebrate Vesak Day.

                                     ************************

REFERENCES

*Haiku in front matter courtesy of:

xAI. Grok. Version 3. Software. https://x.ai. Prompt

by pk 2/25/25.

Dharma in Hell, Fleet Maul, Prison Dharma Network,

2005.

Sitting Inside, Buddhist Practice in America’s Prisons,

Kobai Scott Whitney, Prison Dharma Network, 2003.

Sosaku, Ven. Tonen and Douglas Stream, Milwaukee Zen Centre, Wisconsin, 2005—2009.

Websites: www.milwaukeezencenter.org www.engaged—zen.org/ www.thubtenchodron.org/ www.prisondharmanetwork.org/ www.hatecrimes.com www.prison.com www.inmates.com www.lionheart.org

Google: Wisconsin Prisons

Yellow leaves begin to fall in front of the prison yard in Green Bay, Wisconsin.

BAO ANH LAC BOOKSHELF

Dr. Bhikṣuṇī TN Giới Hương composed

 

 

1. Boddhisattva and Sunyata in the Early and Developed Buddhist Traditions, Bhikṣuṇī Gioi Huong, Delhi-7: Eastern Book Linkers, 1^st print 2004. Tái bản 2^nd reprint 2005 & Vietnam Buddhist University: HCM City: 3^rd
2. Bồ-tát và Tánh Không Trong Kinh Tạng Pali và Đại Thừa, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Delhi-7: Tủ Sách Bảo Anh Lạc, Tái bản lần 2 & 3, NXB Tổng Hợp Tp HCM, 2008 & 2010.
3. Ban Mai Xứ Ấn (3 tập) – Tuyển tập các Tiểu Luận Phật Giáo, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Delhi-7: 2005 và 2006. Nhà Xuất Bản Văn Hóa Sài Gòn,
4. Sārnātha - Vườn Nai – Chiếc Nôi Phật Giáo, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Delhi-7: 2005 và NXB Phương Đông, 2008 & 2010.
5. Xá Lợi Của Đức Phật, Tham Weng Yew, Thích Nữ Giới Hương chuyển ngữ, Delhi-7: 2005 và 2006. Tái bản lần 3, NXB Tổng Hợp Tp HCM,
6. Quy Y Tam Bảo và Năm Giới, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Wisconsin, USA, Tái bản NXB Hồng Đức, năm 2010 & 2016.

7. Vòng Luân Hồi, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Phương Đông, 2008, 2010, 2014 và lần thứ 4, 2016.
8. Hoa Tuyết Milwaukee, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Văn Hoá Sài gòn, 2008.
9. Luân Hồi trong Lăng Kính Lăng Nghiêm, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Văn Hóa Sài gòn, 2008, 2012, 2014 và lần thứ 4, 2016.
10. Quan Âm Quảng Trần, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Tổng Hợp, 2010, 2012, 2014 và lần thứ 4, NXB Hồng Đức, 2018.
11. Sen Nở Nơi Chốn Tử Tù, nhiều tác giả, Thích Nữ Giới Hương chuyển ngữ, NXB Văn Hóa Sài gòn, 2010, 2012 và 2014.
12. Nữ Tu và Tù Nhân Hoa Kỳ, (2 tập), Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Văn Hóa Sài gòn, 2010, 2011, 2014 và lần thứ 4, 2016. NXB Hồng Đức,
13. Nếp Sống Tỉnh Thức của Đức Đạt Lai Lạt Ma Thứ XIV: (2 tập), Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức, năm 2012, 2014, và 2016.
14. A-Hàm: Mưa pháp chuyển hóa phiền não, (2 tập), Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức, năm 2012, 2014, và lần thứ 3, 2016.
15. Góp Từng Hạt Nắng Perris, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức,
16. Pháp Ngữ của Kinh Kim Cang, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức, Tái bản lần thứ 2 & 3: 2015 & 2016.
17. Tập Thơ Nhạc Nắng Lăng Nghiêm, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức,

 

18. Rebirth Views in the Śūraṅgama Sūtra, Bhikṣuṇī TN Giới Hương, Fifth Edition, NXB Hồng Đức, 2018.
19. Commentary of Avalokiteśvara Bodhisattva, Bhikṣuṇī TN Giới Hương, Fourth Edition, NXB Hồng Đức, 2018.
20. Nét Bút Bên Song Cửa, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức,
21. Danh Ngôn Nuôi Dưỡng Nhân Cách - Good Words Nurture a Good Manner, Thích Nữ Giới Hương sưu tầm, NXB Hồng Đức,
22. Hương Sen, Thơ và Nhạc -Lotus Fragrance, Poem and Music (Song ngữ Anh-Việt), Nguyễn Hiền Đức. Chuyển Anh Ngữ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức,
23. Cách Chuẩn Bị Chết và Giúp Người Sắp Chết-Quan Điểm Phật Giáo (Preparing for Death and Helping the Dying – A Buddhist Perspective), Sangye Khadro, Chuyển Việt Ngữ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, tái bản lần 5, NXB Hồng Đức,
24. The Key Words in Vajracchedikā Sūtra, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức Publishing,
25. Văn Hóa Đặc Sắc của Nước Nhật Bản-Exploring the Unique Culture of Japan (Song ngữ Anh-Việt), Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức, 2020.
26. Take Refuge in the Three Gems and Keep the Five Precepts, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Hồng Đức Publishing,

27. Sống An Lạc dù Đời không Đẹp như Mơ-Live Peacefully though Life is not Beautiful as a Dream (Song ngữ Anh-Việt), Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức,
28. Sārnātha —The Cradle of Buddhism from an Archeological Perspective, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Hồng Đức Publishing,
29. Hãy Nói Lời Yêu Thương-Words of Love and Understanding (Song ngữ Anh-Việt), Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Hồng Đức Publishing,
30. Văn Hóa Cổ Kim qua Hành Hương Chiêm Bái -The Ancient- Present Culture in Pilgrim (Song ngữ Anh- Việt), Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức, 2020
31. Cycle of Life, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức, 2020.

32. Nghệ Thuật Biết Sống-Art of Living (Song ngữ Anh- Việt), Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Hồng Đức Publishing,
33. Ni Giới Việt Nam Hoằng Pháp tại Hoa Kỳ, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Hồng Đức Publishing,
34. Sharing the Dharma -Vietnamese Buddhist Nuns in the United States, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Hồng Đức Publishing,
35. Tập Thơ Nhạc Lối Về Sen Nở, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức,
36. Hương Đạo Trong Đời 2022 (Tuyển tập 60 Bài Thi trong Cuộc Thi Viết Văn Ứng Dụng Phật Pháp 2022 - A Collection of Writings on the Practicing of Buddhism in Daily Life in the Writing Contest 2022), Thích Nữ Giới Hương biên soạn, NXB Hồng Đức, 2022.

37. Hương Pháp 2022 (Tuyển Tập Các Bài Thi Trúng Giải Cuộc Thi Viết Văn Ứng Dụng Phật Pháp 2022 - A Collection of the Winning Writings on the Practicing of Buddhism in Daily Life in the Writing Contest 2022) Thích Nữ Giới Hương biên soạn, NXB Hồng Đức,
38. The Ceremony for Peace, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
39. The Lunch Offering Ritual, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
40. The Ritual Offering Food to Hungry Ghosts, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
41. The Pureland Course of Amitabha Sutra, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
42. The Medicine Buddha Sutra, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
43. The New Year Ceremony, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
44. The Great Parinirvana Day, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
45. The Buddha’s Birthday Ceremony, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
46. The Ullambana Festival (Parents’ Day), Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,

47. The Marriage Ceremony, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
48. The Blessing Ceremony for The Deceased, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
49. The Ceremony of Praising Ancestral Masters, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed. Hương Sen 2023.
50. The Enlightened Buddha Ceremony, Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
51. The Uposatha Ceremony (Reciting Precepts), Bhikṣuṇī Thích Nữ Giới Hương composed, NXB Hồng Đức,
52. Giới Hương - Thơm Ngược Gió Ngàn, Nguyên Hà, NXB Tôn Giáo.
53. Pháp Ngữ Kinh Hoa Nghiêm (2 tập). Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Tôn Giáo,
54. Tinh Hoa Kinh Hoa Nghiêm. Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Tôn Giáo,
55. Buddhism: A Historical And Practical Vision, Edited by Dr. Thich Hanh Chanh and Ven. Dr. Bhikṣuṇī TN Gioi Huong, Tôn Giáo Publishing, 2023.
56. Phật Giáo – Tầm Nhìn Lịch Sử Và Thực Hành, Hiệu đính: Thích Hạnh Chánh và Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Tôn Giáo,
57. Contribution of Buddhism For World Peace & Social Harmony. Buddhist Studies Seminar in Kolkata, Edited by Ven. Dr. Buddha Priya Mahathero and Ven. Dr. Bhikṣuṇī TN Gioi Huong, Tôn Giáo Publishing, 2023.

58. Global Spread of Buddhism with Special Reference to Sri Lanka. Buddhist Studies Seminar in Kandy University. Edited by Dr. Ven. Kahawatte Siri Sumedha Thero and Bhikṣuṇī TN Gioi Huong, Tôn Giáo Publishing, 2023.
59. Buddhism In Sri Lanka During The Period of 19^th to 21st Centuries. Buddhist Studies Seminar in Edited by Prof. Ven. Medagama Nandawansa and Dr. Bhikṣuṇī TN Gioi Huong, Tôn Giáo Publishing, 2023.
60. Nhật ký Hành Thiền Vipassana và Kinh Tứ Niệm Xứ -

Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Tôn Giáo, 2024.

61. Diary: Practicing Vipassana and the Four Foundations of Mindfulness Sutta. Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Tôn Giáo Publishing,
62. Dharamshala - Hành Hương Vùng Đất Thiêng, Ấn Độ, Dharamshala - Pilgrimage to the Sacred Land, India. Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Tôn Giáo Publishing,
63. Nghi cúng Thánh Tổ Kiều Đàm Di, Thích Nữ Giới Hương biên soạn, NXB Tôn Giáo,
64. Kỷ Yếu Lễ Tưởng Niệm Thánh Tổ Kiều Đàm Di tại Chùa Hương Sen năm 2024, Thích Nữ Giới Hương biên soạn, NXB Tôn Giáo,
65. Phật Giáo và Thánh Tích Sri Lanka, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Tôn Giáo,
66. Đấu Tranh Bất Bạo Động Là Nền Tảng Xây Dựng Hòa Bình Toàn Cầu (Bài thuyết trình cho Hội Nghị Thượng đỉnh về các Vấn đề Nhân đạo, An ninh Y tế và Hòa bình Toàn cầu ngày 26-31 tháng 8 năm 2024 tại Missouri, Hoa Kỳ), Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Tôn Giáo,

67. Nonviolent Struggle - The Foundation for Building Global Peace (Presentation at the Humanitarian Affairs Health Security and Global Peace Summit August 26- 31, 2024, Missouri, USA). Bhikṣuṇī TN Gioi Huong, Ton Giao Publishing, 2024.
68. The Great Contribution to World Peace and Social Harmony of Emperor Ashoka and Emperor Trần Nhân Tông - Sự Đóng Góp cho Hòa Bình Thế Giới và An Toàn Xã Hội của Hoàng Đế A-Dục và Vua Trần Nhân Tông, Bhikṣuṇī TN Gioi Huong, Ton Giao Publishing, 2025.
69. COVID-19: Vai trò Phật Giáo trong Việc Chữa Lành,

Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức, 2025.

70. Đại Dịch Coronavirus trong Thế Kỷ XXI, Thích Nữ Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức,
71. A Buddhist Nun and American Inmates. Bhikṣuṇī T.N. Giới Hương. Hong Duc Publishing,
72. Đóng góp của Phật Giáo cho Hòa Bình Thế Giới và Hòa Hợp Xã Hội, Hòa thượng Tiến sĩ Buddha Priya Mahathero & Ni sư Tiến sĩ TN Giới Hương, NXB Hồng Đức,
73. Phật Giáo Toàn Cầu - Đặc Biệt Liên Kết Với Sri Lanka, Hòa thượng Tiến sĩ Siri Sumedha Thero & Ni sư Tiến sĩ T.N.Giới Hương, NXB Tôn Giáo, 2025.
74. Phật Giáo Sri Lanka từ Thế Kỷ 19-21, Hòa thượng Giáo sư Medagama Nandawansa, Ni sư Tiến sĩ TN Giới Hương, NXB Tôn Giáo,

BUDDHIST MUSIC ALBUMS HUONG SEN PAGODA

1. Đào Xuân Lộng Ý Kinh, Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc: Nam Hưng, Album 1, năm 2013.
2. Niềm Tin Tam Bảo, Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc: Hoàng Y Vũ & Hoàng Quang Huế, Album 2, năm
3. Trăng Tròn Nghìn Năm Đón Chờ Ai, Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc: Võ Tá Hân, Hoàng Y Vũ, Khánh Hải, Khánh Hoàng, Hoàng Kim Anh, Linh Phương và Nguyễn Tuấn, Album 3, năm
4. Ánh Trăng Phật Pháp, Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc: Uy Thi Ca & Giác An, Album 4, năm
5. Bình Minh Tỉnh Thức (Piano Variations for Meditation), Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Độc Tấu Dương Cầm và Hòa Tấu: Nữ Nhạc Sĩ Linh Phương, Album 5, năm
6. Tiếng Hát Già Lam, Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc: Nam Hưng, Album 6, năm
7. Cảnh Đẹp Chùa Xưa, Nhạc: Hoàng Quang Huế, Hoàng Y Vũ, Võ Tá Hân & Khánh Hải, Album 7, năm
8. Karaoke Hoa Ưu Đàm Đã Nở, Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc: Nam Hưng, Album 8, năm
9. Hương Sen Ca, Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc: Nam Hưng, Album 9, năm
10. Về Chùa Vui Tu, Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc: Nguyên Hà & Nam Hưng, Album 10, năm
11. Gọi Nắng Xuân Về, Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc: Nam Hưng, Album 11, năm 2020.

12. Đệ Tử Phật. Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc: Uy Thi Ca & Giác An, Album 12, năm 2023.
13. Hoa Pháp Cú. Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc: Nam Hưng, Album 13, năm 2024.
14. Vu Lan Báo Hiếu. Thơ: Thích Nữ Giới Hương, Nhạc:

Uy Thi Ca, Album 14, năm 2024.

Mời xem: http://www.huongsentemple.com/index.php/ kinh-sach/tu-sach-bao-anh-lac

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ISBN: 978—604—613—418—3

Please read the whole book with color photos: 45-A_Buddhist_Nun_And_American_Inmates-Inside-20250320.pdf